Sinner
Authors: Sara Douglass
4 Beggars on the Floor, Travellers O’er the Bridge
12 Council of the Five Families
41 A Town Gained, a Sceptre Lost
54 Journeying through the Night
57 While WolfStar Lay Sleeping
If poisonous minerals, and if that tree
Whose fruit threw death on else immortal us,
If lecherous goats, if serpents envious
Cannot be damned, alas, why should I be?
Why should intent or reason, born in me,
Make sins, else equal, in me more heinous?
John Donne,
Holy Sonnet
no. V
The four craft crashed through the barriers between the outer universe and the planet, exploding in raging flames, creating the portal that later races would call the Star Gate.
The creatures inside fought for control of the craft, fought even knowing it was a lost cause – the craft had ceased to listen to them hundreds of years previously. But even when death was only moments away, their hands clung to navigation mechanisms, hoping to somehow save their cargo…and maybe even save the world to which they plummeted from their cargo.
It was useless. Most of them were drifting ashes by the time their flaming craft smashed deep into the surface of the planet.
Most of them. One, like the four craft, survived.
Within days the craft had shifted comfortably into the pits created by their violent arrival, accepting the waters that closed over their surface. For three thousand years they dreamed. Then they woke and began to grow, spreading their tentacles deep beneath the land, reaching out, each to the other. Their metalled surfaces and
walkways and panels and compartments hummed with the music they had learned in the millennia they’d travelled the universe. But this music the craft kept to themselves, not letting it mix with the sound of the Star Dance that filtered through the Star Gate.
The Survivor occasionally woke from his own deep sleep, wandering the corridors of the craft and those hallways that extended between each craft, looking, looking, looking, but never finding.
“
Katie!” he would cry, “Katie! I don’t know where it is!
”
His searching always left him physically and emotionally exhausted, and within days of waking he would wander disconsolately back to his chamber, and there lie down to sleep yet again.
His dreams were disturbed, wondering why he’d survived, and yet not his comrades.
Wondering what the craft needed him to do.
Wondering whether the cargo was safe.
Wondering whether it would ever be claimed.
Wondering.
Aeons passed.
E
nchanter-Talon WolfStar SunSoar wrapped his wings tighter about his body and slipped deeper into the madness that consumed him. He stood at the very lip of the Star Gate itself, his body swaying gently to the sounds of the Star Dance that pounded through the Gate.
Come to me, come to me, join me, dance with me! Come!
Oh! How WolfStar wanted to! How he wanted to fling himself through the Gate, discover the mysteries and adventures of the universe, immerse himself completely in the loveliness of the Star Dance.
Yet WolfStar also wanted the pleasures of this life. The power he wielded as Talon over all Tencendor, the awe of the masses of Icarii, Avar and Acharite, and the firmness of StarLaughter’s body in his bed at night. He was not yet ready to give all that up. He had come young to the Talon throne, and wanted to enjoy it for as long as he could. But how the Star Gate tempted him…
Come! Join me! Be my lover! I have all the power you crave!
WolfStar could feel the indecision tearing him apart. Stars! What sorcery could be his if he managed to
discover the full power of the Star Dance
and
ruled this mortal realm of Tencendor!
I want it
all,
he thought,
all!
But how?
If he surrendered to the almost irresistible lure of the Star Gate and threw himself in, then WolfStar also wanted to know he could come back. Return and flaunt his new-found power and knowledge.
Revel
in it. Use it. Of what use was power if it could not be used in life?
WolfStar was destined for legendary greatness. He knew it.
He shifted on the lip of the Star Gate and his mouth twisted in anger and frustration. What
more
could he do?
Over the past weeks he had selected the most powerful of the young Enchanters among the Icarii and had thrown them through the Star Gate. Come back, he had ordered, with the secrets of the universe in your hand. Share them with me. Tell me how
I
can step through the Star Gate and yet come back.
They were young, and their lives could be wasted, if waste it was.
But none had returned, and WolfStar was consumed with rage. How was he to learn the secrets and mysteries of the Star Gate, of the very universe itself, if they did not come back? Why did they refuse to come back?
Their weakness, their lack of courage, and their consummate failure meant that the mysteries of the stars were denied WolfStar until after his death. No, no, no…he could not countenance that. He
couldn’t!
“WolfStar?”
WolfStar’s body stiffened and he barely restrained himself from letting his power bolt in anger about the chamber. “My title is Talon, CloudBurst. I command that you use it.”
“Brother, you must stop this madness. Nothing gives you the right to murder so many –”
“Murder?” WolfStar leaped down from the lip of the Gate and grasped his brother’s hair, wrenching CloudBurst’s head back. “Murder? They are adventurers, CloudBurst, and they have a duty to their Talon. And they are doing that duty
badly
!”
“WolfStar –”
“
My title is Talon
!” WolfStar screamed and twisted CloudBurst’s head until the birdman’s neck creaked and his face contorted in agony.
“Talon,” CloudBurst whispered, and WolfStar’s grip loosened. “Talon, you are throwing these children to their deaths. How many lives have been wasted now? Two hundred? More, Talon,
more!
”
“They would not die if they crawled back through the Star Gate. They have wasted themselves, not I.
They
have failed.
Their
blame, not mine.”
“No-one has ever come back through the –”
“That is not to say no-one can, CloudBurst.” WolfStar finally let CloudBurst go and stood back. “Perhaps they are not strong enough. I need young Enchanters of powerful blood. Very powerful.” His eyes locked with CloudBurst’s.
“No!” CloudBurst sank to his knees, quivering hands outstretched in appeal. “No! I beg you. Not –”
“Bring me your daughter, CloudBurst. StarGrace has SunSoar power. Part of her shares my blood. Perhaps she will succeed where others have failed.”
“No! WolfStar, I cannot –”
“I am
Talon
,” WolfStar hissed. “I am WolfStar SunSoar, and I
command
you! Obey me!”
But StarGrace did not return, either. WolfStar muttered instructions and orders to the terrified, sobbing sixteen-year-old girl as he seized her by her wings and hurled her into the Star Gate. But like all the others, she only
cartwheeled into the pit of the universe to vanish completely. WolfStar stood at the lip of the Star Gate for two full days, watching and waiting, taking neither food nor drink, before he cursed StarGrace for all eternity for her weakness and failure and stepped back.
He jumped, startled.
“You are tired, my husband. Will you not take some rest?”
StarLaughter stepped forward from the shadows of the arches. “Come with me, my love, and let me warm and soothe you to sleep.”
WolfStar reached out and smoothed his wife’s dark hair back from her face. She was his first cousin, close SunSoar blood, and second only to him in Enchanter power. So powerful.
Perhaps too powerful. For months now WolfStar had good reason to suspect StarLaughter plotted against him, plotted to take the title of Talon for herself.
WolfStar almost laughed. She must be mad to think she could wrest power from him.
He caressed her cheek, his fingers gentle, and StarLaughter forced herself to smile, even though her love for her husband was long dead.
WolfStar leaned forward and kissed her softly, allowing his hand to slide down over her body until he felt the energy throbbing through her swollen belly. His son, and so powerful, so powerful…did his unborn son conspire with Star Laughter? Was their son the reason she thought she could best him?
WolfStar’s hand stilled. His son. Even unborn he wielded more power than any other Enchanter he’d sent through the Star Gate. His son.
Perhaps
he
could succeed…his
son.
And it would certainly solve the more immediate problem of StarLaughter’s treachery.
StarLaughter’s hands closed over his and wrenched it away from her body.
No!
she screamed through his mind.