Sleeping Arrangements (31 page)
Read Sleeping Arrangements Online
Authors: Madeleine Wickham
'Yes,' said Hugh, smiling back. 'Absolutely.'
Chloe looked up. Something about Hugh's voice was wrong. And his smile.
'Perhaps we'll end up stripping for a living!'
'Maybe,' said Hugh, and smiled again. 'Maybe we will.'
What was it? thought Chloe. Something about him just wasn't ringing true.
'Philip,' she said suddenly. 'Go and put this note somewhere prominent in the hall. And leave some extra money for the maid.'
'OK,' said Philip, walking towards the villa. 'How much, do you think?'
'It doesn't matter,' said Chloe. 'Whatever you think. And check under the beds again!'
She waited until the door had closed behind Philip, then looked directly at Hugh.
'You haven't resigned at all, have you?' she said. 'You haven't really left your job.'
Hugh stared at her as though he'd been slapped. He opened his mouth, then closed it again.
'Oh Hugh,' said Chloe. 'What have you done?'
Hugh didn't reply. He began to fiddle with the wing mirror of the car, his face averted from her gaze.
'Hugh . . .'
'I tried to resign,' said Hugh in a rush. 'I tried to. I phoned up and told the head of human resources exactly how I felt. At some length. And . . .'
'And?'
'And he told me to have a month off.'
'A month,' said Chloe. 'And you agreed to that?'
Hugh was silent. The sun passed behind a gauzy cloud. There was the distant sound of an aeroplane passing over, far away.
'Chloe, I don't want to be unemployed,' he said at last. 'I'm not strong. I'm not a pioneer, like you and Philip. I haven't got your . . . guts, I suppose.'
'What about spending more time with your family?'
'I'll do that!' said Hugh. 'I've got a month off. Everything will change.'
'In a month?'
'I'll change the whole way I work. It'll be different from now on. It will.'
'Does Amanda know?'
'Not yet. That's the point. This will give her a shock. Then we can regroup, start again, do things differently . . .'
As he spoke, Chloe stared at him, and felt a sudden jolt of recognition. Hugh was wearing exactly the same frozen expression she'd seen on his twenty-year-old face at the instant he'd realized who Sam was. An expression she hadn't understood at the time, but had analysed during a thousand sleepless nights since. Ashamed, aware of his own weakness, apologetic—but determined not to let his boat capsize. The self-preservation instinct rode so high in Hugh Stratton, nothing else could compete.
She exhaled sharply, feeling something released inside her.
'You never could take that chance, could you?' she said simply. 'You never could take that leap.'
Hugh took a step towards her, his eyes fixed determinedly on hers.
'I would have leapt this time,' he said. 'If you'd said yes, I would have leapt.'
'Would you?' Chloe smiled disbelievingly.
There was silence between them. Inside the villa, a door slammed; from around the corner, voices were approaching.
'Chloe, don't think badly of me,' said Hugh quickly. 'Last time we parted . . . you despised me. Don't despise me this time.'
'I don't despise you,' said Chloe.
'I want you to think better of me than you did then.' His voice was pleading. 'Do you think I'm a better person now?'
'Come on, Octavia!' came Amanda's voice. She was striding towards them, disgruntled children in tow.
'Do you?' said Hugh urgently. 'Do you, Chloe?'
'Chloe!' called Amanda. 'Chloe?'
Shooting Hugh a helpless glance, Chloe turned her head.
'Yes?' she said.
'Have you seen a pot of Factor Twelve sun cream? Lancôme?'
'I . . . I don't think so,' said Chloe.
'I know it was by the pool this morning.' Amanda shook her head. 'Oh well. These things happen. Now, where's Jenna? Jenna!'
'All done,' said Philip, emerging from the villa.
'Good,' said Chloe. She shot another glance at Hugh, then moved away, towards their own car.
Jenna and Sam appeared in the drive, both a little pink in the face.
'Bye,' said Jenna casually, and hefted her knapsack onto her back.
'Bye,' muttered Sam, and gave a nonchalant shrug. 'See you around.' They touched hands briefly, then moved to their respective cars.
'Yes,' said Amanda. 'Well of course, we must all meet up. For a drink or something. As soon as the house is finished, we'll have you over. We could make it dinner. Or brunch!'
'Maybe,' said Chloe.
'Maybe,' said Hugh.
As she met his eyes, she knew it was never going to happen. They would never meet again—at least not deliberately. Perhaps by chance. She had a sudden glimpse of them bumping into each other, in ten years' time. At the theatre, or out Christmas shopping. Older, set into middle age; the two Stratton girls sulky teenagers. Sam well into his twenties. A surprised greeting, polite enquiries, laughter at this remembered holiday—now just an anecdote in the file. A quick, silent glance between her and Hugh. A promise to meet up again. And then away into the crowds once more.
'Maybe,' she said again, and looked away.
'Right,' said Hugh. He turned to Octavia and Beatrice. 'All set? In you get.'
'If Jenna sits in the middle . . .' said Amanda, frowning thoughtfully at the car. 'That means Beatrice must get in first . . .'
'I want to sit next to Daddy,' interrupted Beatrice. 'I want to play silly faces.'
'I'll play silly faces,' said Jenna.
'With Daddy,' whined Beatrice, and a ripple of pleasure passed over Hugh's face, like wind across the sea.
'We'll play silly faces when we stop,' he said, his voice light and happy. 'I promise, Beatrice.' He got into the car and unwound the window. 'Bye, Philip. Bye, Chloe.'
Next to him, Amanda was buckling her seat belt. She leaned down to get something from a bag at her feet, and Chloe moved towards Hugh's window.
'Hugh,' she said hurriedly. 'Hugh, what you asked before . . .'
She hesitated, and he turned towards the window, his face taut.
'Yes,' said Chloe simply. 'Yes, I do.'
A slow, happy expression grew on Hugh's face.
'Thanks,' he said, his voice deliberately casual.
'No problem,' said Chloe. 'Have a . . . have a good journey.'
A flicker of emotion passed over his face. He nodded, then started up the car. Beside him, Amanda sat up, holding a small make-up bag, and said something to him which Chloe couldn't hear. She turned and waved brightly at Chloe; after a pause, Chloe waved back.
She stood quite still as the car proceeded down the drive, paused, then disappeared out of the gates. For a few moments she stared, transfixed, at where they had been. Where he had been. As Philip put a hand on her shoulder, she turned with an easy smile.
'OK?' she said. 'No point hanging about, is there?'
'No,' said Philip, and put an arm tightly around her. 'No point at all.'