Sliding Into Home (24 page)

“Tell me more.”

I sort of just volunteered Hank to be in my show, which was not even a real show yet. When I mentioned this to Hank he wasn’t thrilled about it. It was certainly better than my pretending to be single, but Hank had his own career and wasn’t sure being on TV was for him. He’s not a public guy, so I knew it would be a stretch, but it seemed to me like the only way for it to work and for us to be together.

After laying down some ground rules—no sexual stuff, no making anyone look like a fool—Hank agreed to give it a shot. Kevin still looked at Hank like he was a nerd, but he agreed to put him in
the pilot. We thought maybe Hank would just sort of show up in an episode every now and then, but when the people at E! saw the pilot they loved him.

Nothing was definite, though, and no deal was set. Time was ticking and I didn’t have a new show locked in. I didn’t even have Hank locked in. We were a couple, and we were happy, but I had no clue what the future held for us. I didn’t want to pressure him into anything, but it was tough to keep my emotions in check.

Then, even though we were still doing our best to hide the relationship, more and more people were starting to find out about us. I was going to games in Philadelphia and sitting with the coach’s wife instead of in the players’ wives’ section in order to not get caught, but it didn’t work. People were starting to put it all together.

The nail in the coffin, so to speak, came when I was in Philly visiting Hank in the middle of football season. We were out with some friends, who happened to have just gotten engaged, and I took a second to try on the girl’s ring. Not only did it look great on me and probably put all kinds of pressure on Hank, but people in the bar saw Hank and me kissing and me with a ring on and jumped to conclusions. Before I knew it, it was all over the Internet that I was engaged.

Hell, no.
I was not going to let other people decide my future. I denied everything, even the relationship, because I wasn’t going to be pressured into admitting anything about Hank or hurting Hef in any way. Things eventually died down, but I felt awful about all the unwanted exposure.

After trying to lie low for a bit, on Halloween weekend I hosted a big party in San Diego. I got pretty drunk, which was not smart because I had to fly out early the next morning with my family to
Seattle to meet Hank, who was in town playing the Seahawks, and his family. I didn’t know why the hell he wanted to turn a game in Seattle into some big family vacation, but I wasn’t going to argue.

I arrived on Saturday, groggy and hungover, and all I wanted to do was sleep, but our families were dying to be tourists and check out the Space Needle. I actually thought it would be a pretty cool thing to do, if I wasn’t so tired.

“Rest up,” Hank told me when I got to our hotel room. “When I get back from our team meeting we are going to the Space Needle.”

“Nooo, Hank,” I whined. “I’m too tired.”

“It will be fun.”

“If you want me to get out of this bed, you might have to propose to me,” I said, totally joking.

He didn’t say anything. I was kidding around, obviously. Maybe he just didn’t think that was funny?

Hank left for his meeting, so I was able to rest a little bit. But after what felt like ten seconds of sleep he was back, waking me up and urging me to get dressed.

“I’m tired, baby,” I moaned, desperately wanting to stay in bed.

“Come on, it’s time to go,” he said. “Our families are waiting.”

“Look at the weather,” I argued with one eye open to peek out the window. “The Needle is going to be closed.”

I didn’t even know if that made sense, but I was willing to try anything to get him to let me sleep.

“Get up! Get up! Get up!”

“Ahhhh,
fine
!”

I got up slowly and got dressed while Hank did everything possible to speed me up.
What is wrong with this guy?
I thought.

We went downstairs and packed into a car—me, my mom, my
brother, Hank, and his mom and dad. We were like the Griswolds in those National Lampoon’s
Vacation
movies, heading to the big, fancy Space Needle.

When we got to the top it was windy and rainy but Hank was so into it. Actually, when I looked around I thought it was a pretty romantic place, but after all my complaining I wasn’t about to let anyone know that I was having a good time. Eagles TV happened to be filming a segment up there for their pregame show, but this was purely a tourist trip for us. Hank didn’t have to do an interview, and I sure as hell didn’t have any plans to get in front of a camera, but just as we were about to leave Hank decided he wanted us all to take a nice family photo. So we all lined up, and before the shot was taken, Hank popped out of the line and dropped to one knee in front of me.

I looked around and saw everyone in my family looking at me, teary-eyed. I couldn’t believe what was happening. In my head I was thinking,
Are you fucking serious right now?
I thought it was a joke.

Hank looked me in the eyes and said, “Over the past seven months I’ve gotten to know you, and . . .” I think I blacked out a little because it was all a blur to me from then on. Luckily one of our moms pulled Eagles TV over to film everything and capture the moment.

He pulled a ladybug-shaped box that I’d told him I loved way back when we went together to the Del Mar Fair from his pocket. That day I had told him about the ladybugs I found when my mom took me to the bay after my dad left. He’d asked his brother, who was at the fair with us, to buy the box for him when I wasn’t paying attention.

Hank had bought the box—and, it turned out, the ring—before I freaked out about telling Hef, before I pressured him about our
future, before pretty much everything. There had never been any reason to worry. He knew he wanted to marry me from the very beginning.

“Will you marry me?” Hank asked.

In the most serious voice I have ever used I immediately gave him my response: “Yes, I will marry you.”

We kissed and hugged, and I spent the rest of the day staring at the ring on my finger and bouncing off the walls with excitement. I couldn’t believe I was engaged.

When I was able to think clearly again, I called Mary and told her the news; I knew it was only a matter of time before it got out. I was so happy, and she was happy for me. Hef and everyone at
Playboy
loved it, too. They couldn’t believe that the crazy little tomboy party-girl was now engaged. Their baby was all grown up.

The next day we went to Hank’s game, and then we had to go our separate ways again. That really sucked.

It was strange going back to the Mansion as an engaged woman. (I’m sure that doesn’t happen at the Playboy Mansion very often.) We were still filming the show and doing photo shoots, and I had to take the ring off every time I was around the cameras. I was so happy to be engaged that I hated taking it off, but it had to be done.

Finally we finished filming, and then I spent a couple of weeks packing up my life at the Mansion and preparing to move forward.

During one of my last days at the Mansion I took a break from packing my belongings and went in to Mary’s office to see what she was up to. We started talking about Hank and my wedding and, half kidding, I said, “Wouldn’t it be cool if I got married at the Mansion?”

I was only
half
kidding because I really did think it would be an incredible place to get married, but I also thought there was no way
it was ever going to happen. To my surprise, Mary liked the idea. She said she was going to ask Hef, and I figured she meant in a few weeks, after I had left the Mansion—or at the very least after I had left the room. But Hef walked in a minute or two later, and the first thing out of her mouth was, “What do you think about Kendra getting married here?”

“Shut up!” I yelled, my face turning bright red. I ran up to my room.

Hef followed me and sat down next to me on my bed and said, “If you want to get married here, I’d love it.”

“Oh my God!” I replied.

I couldn’t believe it. The only wedding that had ever been held at the Playboy Mansion was Hef’s own wedding, back in the eighties. It really was an honor for him to allow us to get married there.

“Are you serious?” I asked again, just to make sure.

“Of course, darling.”

“Thank you so much,” I said. “Let me ask Hank.”

“The offer is there,” Hef said before leaving my room. “Let me know what you decide.”

It was certainly something to think about.

When the time came for me to move, I was way more emotional than I thought I would be. The scene in the show where they filmed me saying good-bye to Hef, the girls, and the staff was the most genuine scene I ever shot. Those were real tears.

I’m terrible with good-byes; I usually just make them quick and hide behind a tough face the entire time. But for the show I had to stick around, and the tears came pouring down. Hef, Holly, and Bridget were and always will be a huge part of my life, and we’d been through a lot together.

When the cameras stopped rolling I went back and said good-bye to everyone again. I wanted them to know I was really going to miss them and that I wasn’t putting on an act for the show.

I saw these people every day of my life for nearly five years, and while they all hold a special place in my heart, I knew I wouldn’t be seeing them very much in the future. Moving out felt like a graduation of some sort. I was happy to be moving on to a new adventure, but sad about all I was leaving behind. It was definitely a bittersweet moment.

I packed a couple of bags and my dogs into my car and drove to my new town house in the Valley in the pouring rain. The movers had to start loading everything—electronics, memorabilia, and bags and bags of clothes—into my home that night because I had to be settled before starting my new show, which had been officially picked up and was ready to roll.

I got to my new place and at nine o’clock at night I realized,
Oh, shit, I don’t have any furniture.

Everything in the Mansion was property of
Playboy
, so all I had were clothes and the crap I’d accumulated while living at the Mansion (I was a real hoarder back then). I ran to a furniture store that was open late and bought a couch and a bed and everything I needed as quickly as possible. The only problem was that they couldn’t deliver any of it until the next day.

I didn’t know what to do. I had just said all my big good-byes, and I was excited about my new life. Hank and I were engaged and ready to plan a wedding and film all the fun for a new show. Going back, even for a day, seemed strange.

But everyone at the Mansion was like family to me, and I was
stuck. I called Hef and he immediately invited me back. Who says you can never go home again?

I went back to the Mansion, spent one last night in my old room, and then moved out for good. My final good-bye was a big step for me. You usually don’t recognize a life-changing moment as it is happening, but walking out that door—again—I knew that nothing would ever be the same. (For real this time!) In that moment I felt like I was growing up, which was both exciting and scary at the same time.

CHAPTER 20
 

A Biscuit in Mrs. Baskett

From the second I left the Mansion I was busy planning the wedding. We wanted to get married in June, so that gave us less than seven months to pull the whole thing together.

When I first told Hank about possibly having our wedding at the Playboy Mansion, I could tell he had some doubts. He hadn’t met Hef yet, and he thought it would be strange to get married at my ex-boyfriend’s house. While I really didn’t consider Hef my ex-boyfriend, we had enough of a relationship that it was hard to argue with Hank. Beyond that, though, Hank wanted our life as a couple to start new and fresh, and having the wedding at the Mansion reminded him too much of my old life.

I was a little bummed because the Mansion is so beautiful and it meant a lot to me. It symbolized who I was and how I had grown up over the years. But I understood where Hank was coming from.

We went back and forth on what kind of wedding we wanted to have. Some days we’d decide we wanted a big wedding, and other
times we were ready to run to the courthouse and just get it over with.

The one thing we knew was that we were ready to get hitched. After all the sneaking around and long-distance dating came to an end, we were relieved to be able to start a regular relationship. When football season was finally over and Hank and I could wake up next to each other every morning, it was such a great feeling that we just wanted to be married right away.

To that end, a quick wedding at the courthouse seemed like the easiest option, but Hank is a traditional kind of guy, and he thought we deserved a day to remember. As always, he was right.

Then we thought about having a destination wedding in Hawaii, but we knew that would be an expensive trip for our guests. We had no idea what we were going to do, until my mom stepped in.

“Kendra, who gets to have their wedding at the Playboy Mansion?” asked the woman who’d once told me to fear the orgy. “It’s a beautiful place. You’d be making history. What’s better than that?”