Slow Ride Home (The Grady Legacy) (10 page)

“Now I’ve learned that the man I trusted with my life, the man who pounded into me how a man’s word is sacred, lied to me about what he’d done to you. Repeatedly. So you’re not the only one dealing with the past. It’s slammed me in the face too.

“And yeah,” he said settling, “you’d be right to say it’s not comparable to being called a whore. So here’s what we’re gonna do. I know it’s not an easy thing to let go of and pretend everything’s hunky dory, but how about we come to a truce? Acknowledge we were both hurt by my grandfather?” After wiping his hand on his thigh, he held out it out.

The seconds his hand hung out there stretched longer and longer before she nodded and, searching his eyes, placed her palm in his.

It was a step toward trust. A small one. One that wouldn’t erase the doubts about their future. His. Or hers. Maybe they’d end up sleeping together again. Maybe not. Maybe they’d decide to see each other again. Or maybe not. Maybe he’d been an itch for her to scratch. Maybe he’d end up hurt again. Or maybe she would. But he was willing to give it a try.

Sex was easy. Trust took a lot longer to earn.

Chapter Six

“Hey, AJ, when did you get back?”

Allie looked up from the report she was reading to find Kathy leaning against the baffle separating Allie’s office from the next claim investigator’s cubicle. “I got in last night.”

It had been nice to get back to her own bed, away from the memories of what she’d once had and lost. Though her actions in the back of his truck haunted her. It had been a spontaneous act, one she’d sworn not to regret at the time, but at night, in the dark, staring at the ceiling? Yeah, it was a huge elephant sitting on her chest whispering “what did you do?” and “you’ll get hurt again” in a mosquito-like whine.

Kathy rested a shoulder against the baffle and waited with eyebrows raised.

“I’m waiting for a report from our investigators looking into George’s activities.” Allie pulled up the notes she’d taken. “I’ve talked to Ben’s mother, who hasn’t heard about George having any children other than Ed. I also phoned George’s widow, whose companion informed me that any questions needed to be directed to her brother Charlie, who’s been putting me off, claiming he’s too busy to discuss rumors about his dead brother-in-law with me. By the way, Charlie happens to be Charles Carter of Carter, Murphy and Scott.”

Kathy whistled. “They were listed as one of Dallas’s Top Ten Legal firms last year. Impressive. But I notice you didn’t mention a certain cowboy.”

“Ben is a claimant. I am not going to have a relationship with him.” At least, not a long-term relationship.

Kathy moved from the baffle to the edge of the long counter, which made up part of Allie’s desk beneath the window. “I never said you were fixing to have a relationship. Which means you’re thinking about getting back together with him, aren’t you?”

Her stomach flip-flopped as she considered the ramifications of Kathy’s question. As much as she didn’t want to talk about her personal life, it could potentially affect SSTGs liability. Considering she’d already told Kathy she and Ben had once had a relationship, she figured her boss deserved the truth. “We’ve come to a truce.”

A frown creasing her forehead, Kathy nodded slowly. “I know it’s not my place to give advice, but be careful if you decide to get involved with him again. A person can change—you have. Sure as shooting, he has too.”

“Tell me about it.” She may have been a ranch hand’s daughter back then, someone the boss could kick off his land, but now she had a job. A career. Her confidence in herself may not have been as strong as it had been back then, but she had a place in the world she’d carved out herself. If Ben walked away, or if she decided to end things, her world wouldn’t crumble. Her heart might bear yet another scar, but she’d survive that too.

“Am I going have to look for a new claims investigator when we’re done here?”

“No. I’m done with changing my life to suit a guy.” She’d tried changing for Lewis, and look at how well that had worked.
Not
. “I’m not ready for a relationship yet, especially not with Ben Grady.”

“Uh-huh. Well, keep me up to date when you get the report back from the team looking into Gramp’s past. If you need any help with Charlie Carter, let me know. I’ve got a few friends who are members of his club who might give me some leverage with him.” Kathy left, then poked her head back around the baffle and grinned. “Oh, and if you need any help scratching an itch with your cowboy, don’t hesitate to call.”

As if she needed help!
Ha!
Man, she hadn’t realized how itchy she’d been until yesterday. Now her body felt alive as it hadn’t in ages.

Ben feathered his fingers over her skin, setting her nerve endings aflame with need. She’d thought him a good lover back in high school, but they’d taken their time, let their curiosity discover what they liked worked, and what they didn’t. Lewis’s lovemaking had been almost perfunctory. Satisfactory but not high on the wow factor. Even back in high school, Ben had been better than Lewis, but yesterday he’d hit the
Holy cow I’ll burst into flames if I come any harder
end of the scale. Now that he’d awoken her body, it wanted more. Lots more.

Her nipples were still sensitive from when he’d kissed them, nipped them, played with them. Once a breast man, always a breast man, she chuckled to herself.

The first time they’d gone all the way had been in the back of his truck one summer night. In the same spot where they’d had the threesome. He’d packed a picnic, spread blankets in the back of the truck over an old sofa-bed mattress and they’d lain under the stars watching a meteor shower. He’d been slow, almost as afraid as she’d been. Neither of them had known exactly what would happen considering she was a virgin, but they’d both heard plenty of stories, some claiming it wouldn’t hurt, others saying she’d be in pain for days. It had turned out to be an almost non-event. No pain, no blood like she’d heard other girls complain about. Then he’d filled her. Holy cow, she wondered why she’d held him off for so long.

Once they’d found their rhythm, he’d tested her ability to come so many times, to last so much longer than him, something her ex had never noticed or if he had, hadn’t cared. She’d considered it a trade-off for being with someone grounded, not the bronco-riding cowboy Ben was. But after a while, she found herself longing for more than a scheduled sex night, worked in between
Law and Order
and the wrap-up of the eleven o’clock news. Longing to be desired with a passion she’d never doubted when she was with Ben.

Had it been her imagination that some form of tenuous connection been reforming between her and Ben, something beyond the physical? But whether it was old feelings resurfacing or something new, she didn’t know. Or was Ben simply trying to distract her from doing her job? Which reminded her...

After checking the clock at the bottom of her monitor, she lifted her phone. If Logan was on the ball, Ackerman and Freeman should have received the release form allowing the former Bull’s Hollow lawyer to talk to her about ol’ George’s shenanigans. “Watch out, George, because if I find out you kicked me off your ranch for unbecoming behavior after you’d diddled someone other than Agnes, you’ll find yourself kicked out of the Pearly Gates and saying hello to some pretty hot weather.” If he wasn’t already in hell.

Chapter Seven

A week she’d waited. A week she’d been patient. And nothing, Allie fumed. She’d phoned Ackerman and Freeman every day, only to be told they hadn’t been contacted by either Logan or any of the Gradys giving their approval to talk to her. Logan wasn’t returning her phone calls, and when she’d phoned Ben the night before, he hadn’t answered and hadn’t returned her call this morning.

What did they think, that they were her only claimant, her only case? That she would be happy sitting around twiddling her thumbs waiting until they got theirs out of their asses? Gravel pinged off her car’s undercarriage as she turned off the main road and into the Bull’s Hollow work yard.

“Where’s your boss?” she snapped to the first hand who crossed her path once she’d discovered the ranch office empty.

The ranch hand’s eyes widened and, as if sensing her mood, stepped back. “He’s round behind the horse barn, ma’am.”

Ma’am? When had she become a ma’am? She stalked past the machinery and beside the barn he’d pointed to. The four-letter words and shouting she’d planned caught in her throat when she found her target, one foot raised onto the wooden fence, pulling denim tight over his very fine ass, his fingers scratching the neck of a gangly-legged foal who was still unsteady on his feet.

“You’re a sweet boy, aren’t you?” Ben’s husky crooning melted the mental ice shield she’d erected. The foal’s ears flickered as he leaned into Ben’s touch.

She knew first-hand how it felt to be touched by him. Even as they were both driven to satisfy their physical needs in the back of the truck, Ben had been gentle with her. He’d taken his time, made sure he wasn’t just scratching his own itch. They hadn’t just had sex, she’d realized, he’d made love to her.

The realization floored her. She took a step back, her hand pressed to her mouth.

“He was just born last night.”

Allie jumped at the deep voice right beside her. Damn, she’d been so caught up first watching Ben and then in her own revelation that she hadn’t even noticed she wasn’t the only one in the yard, though more likely the hand had been watching the foal, not her. As she turned to face the new arrival, the wind whipped across the fields, sweeping her hair into her face. In an impatient gesture, she shoved it aside and held her hand as a shade to glance up at him. Since he was as tall as Ben, Allie had to tilt her chin high to look up at him.

“I’m Gabe Larson. You must be Miss Allie.” Jet-black hair stuck out from beneath Gabe’s John Deere baseball cap. Unlike the other shit-shoveler, his teeth were perfect, bright white against sun-darkened skin.

“I don’t know about I must be, but I am.”

He tapped his temple and winked. “I’m not psychic or anything, Ben’s been talkin’ about a woman he knows working on his case and since there aren’t a lot of strange women who know their way around the spread, I figured you must be her.”

“Gabe’s a real natural with the horses.” Ben abandoned the foal. His long legs covered the distance between them in an unhurried stride, but Allie’s breath caught with each step. How did he still have the power to affect her even after all these years? “If it hadn’t been for him, I don’t think we could have saved this little guy’s life last night.”

Gabe buffed his fingernails on his shirt. “Not bad for a city kid pulled off the streets. Anyhoo, I gotta get back to work. The boss is a real slave driver.” With another wink, he touched the brim of his hat in an old-fashioned gesture. “I hope I get to meet you again, Miss Allie. Maybe I can show you some of the other colts.”

Ben waited until Gabe had disappeared into the barn before he tucked his arm around her waist and kissed her forehead. “Sorry I didn’t call you back yet, but I was down here helping Gabe last night, and then I forgot about phoning you back. Sorry.”

Her irritation deflated as if he’d pricked a balloon, only to rise again slightly that her body responded so easily to him. “I thought you might be avoiding me, especially since Logan wasn’t returning my calls either.” Damn it, she hadn’t intended to be so strident. She softened her tone. “Randy Freeman’s secretary says he still hasn’t received a release from you. I know you want this wrapped up quickly but I can’t move forward until I’ve talked to him and I don’t have time to play telephone tag between the three of you.”

Ben frowned. “Logan said he’d send the release right over a couple of days ago. I guess he got delayed. From what I hear, Charlie Carter treats the associates like they’re slaves.”

One of the perils of working for a big law firm. Not that it meant she hadn’t busted her ass too. “I’m sure he is busy but he’s delaying your case. The sooner I can talk to George’s lawyers, the sooner I can get out of your hair.” The rest of it could be done from the safety of her desk in Houston. Far away from temptation.

“You drove all the way out here just to say that? You must have really wanted to see me.” A grin flickered across his lips. “Maybe you’re hopin’ for a ride on my bale stacker this time?”

“I didn’t—” she spluttered, then snapped her mouth shut. “Is that what you call it these days?” Why
had
she driven out here instead of just getting on the phone and yelling at Logan?

“Uh-oh, you’re frowning. What’s the matter? You’ve been overthinking what happened last time you were out, haven’t you?”

Had life with Lewis had put her on the defensive too much? She glanced around to make sure Gabe couldn’t overhear them, but he’d disappeared from sight. “What happened last time shouldn’t happen again, and being with you...”
is just too tempting.
“I had to drive into Abilene on another case anyway.” Liar. “It’s too long a commute to come out here for a casual drive-by how-ya-doin’ call.” Or a booty call either.

“I’d drive five hours to see you.” He stroked one finger down her cheek, down her neck and over her shoulder. There was no way he’d miss how her body shivered with his touch, or her nipples jutting against her silk blouse. “Since you’re out here anyway, are you stayin’ for dinner? Maybe some dessert?”

“It’s not a good idea.” No matter how much her body wanted to accept his invitation, she had to keep her distance if she was going to escape with her heart and her reputation intact.

He rocked on his heels, his gaze skimming down her body, lingering on her cleavage—
typical guy
—and landing on her feet. He looked back up, his grin widening. “Sensible shoes today, huh?”

“They’re my driving shoes. I can’t drive in high heels.” Why did he have to be so darned easy to talk to? Why couldn’t he be more like Lewis? Who would close himself off, claiming he was distracted by work—though she hadn’t realized just what type of secrets he’d kept from her using that excuse. With Ben’s easy grin, and “everybody’s my buddy” openness he wasn’t capable of subterfuge and made her want to be around him even more.

Her assertion to Kathy that she wasn’t going to get into a relationship with Ben was looking less and less likely as each minute passed.

“As much as I like the way those other shoes make your behind wiggle when you walk, I like these ones too. Because it means you can go for a walk with me.” He skimmed his hand down her arm, catching her fingers, and led her away from the barn.

As much as she knew she should be saying no, telling him about the work waiting on her desk, she found herself walking beside him, past the pasture filled with colts and away from the barns, two of Ben’s border collies racing ahead of them.

The awareness of how close he was to her, of their fingers laced together, of the way his thumb stroked the back of her hand set Allie to mentally chanting
Be careful about falling for him again
. Which of course made the most obstinate part of her body want to drag him under a tree, unzip his pants, wrap her legs around him and have hot, dirty sex until the cows came home. Literally.

Get your mind off of sex.
Talk about something else.
But what? “Gabe seems nice.”

Wow
,
wasn’t she the queen of small talk today?

“He came to live here just after I left for college. Gramps knew Gabe’s mother or his grandmother, and they were desperate to get him straightened out before he ended up in jail instead of just reporting to a parole officer. Naturally enough Gramps agreed, but rather than dealing with him himself, he shoved Gabe on Pa to deal with.”

“Sounds like what he’d do.”

“What did Pa used to say about him?” He changed his voice and did a fair impression of his father. “‘I about quit and moved to California when Gramps told me I was responsible for this pimply faced fourteen-year-old with a Texas-sized chip on his shoulder and pants that barely covered his skinny butt. And talk about an attitude to boot.’ I can’t tell you the number of times the first year Gabe here, Pop would tell me how he pleaded with Gramps to rat him out to his parole officer, but Gramps was insistent that Gabe would straighten up. Luckily for us all, he did.”

“I bet your grandmother wasn’t thrilled.”

“Ma was more of the problem because Gabe and Jake immediately became fast friends.”

She laughed. “It’s always the way.”

He stooped to pick up a stick one of the dogs dropped at his feet and tossed it, both dogs chasing after it. “Anyway, Gabe drove everyone nuts for about eighteen months, spouting profanities and slacking off, and then all of a sudden something clicked and he manned up. When old Mr. Kyper retired, Dad made Gabe equine manager, and he’s doing a better job than the old man.”

“That’s nice.”

As they continued walking, they fell silent. Allie discovered she liked the silence between them, the way they didn’t feel like they had to fill the space. It was almost like they’d been when they were dating, when they could finish each other’s sentences and didn’t need to speak to know what the other was thinking. Especially since it gave her time to check him out.

The chaps were missing again today, but it gave her a better view of the way his jeans hugged his ass and his thighs. The sun turned the reddish-blond stubble gold. Her free hand touched her shoulder where she’d discovered a light rash after they’d made love in the back of his truck.

They passed a field of fresh-cut hay, the swallows swooping low over the fields to catch the insects the combines had disturbed. A half mile farther, Ben slowed to point out the various cows that were being good mamas, and to another who apparently had abandoned her calf. He had such passion about everything to do with the ranch. It was refreshing compared to the number of people she knew just putting in time to collect a paycheck.

“Logan says you passed the New York Bar. He says it’s one of the hardest bar exams in the country.”

“Not the hardest, but it’s up there.”

He stopped walking, forcing her to stop too. “So why are you working as a claims investigator for an insurance company?”

“You mean, why aren’t I working with a fancy law firm making the big bucks like Logan?”

“Well, yeah. You’re as smart as he is.”

Pleased by the compliment but not wanting him to see it, she bent down to pick a flower—the plant might be a weed, but it didn’t make it any less pretty.

“Most lawyers don’t make more than about fifty thousand a year. Only the few from the top-tier law schools get the big bucks from the high-profile firms. Like Logan. But I didn’t go to a top-tier school.”

The peace she’d found during their walk dissipated. “Not to mention that I don’t have references for my work over the past five years. Which,” she said bitterly, “is a black mark against me.”

“You worked with your ex’s firm.” Understanding flickered across his expression. “That son of a bitch won’t give you a reference.”

“Not him specifically, but his father, who is the senior partner.”

“Why? Because you divorced his son?”

“Partly, but mainly because he never approved of the marriage right from the start. I think he took great pleasure in blackballing me even though it was his son who cheated on me, not the other way around.” Seemed to be the story of her life. “Anyway, I got the job at SSTG because I knew Kathy.” Who had been one of her sister-in-law’s friends—and one of the few acquaintances who had stuck by her during her divorce. “When she heard I was looking for a job, she came up with one. It wouldn’t have been my first choice, but seeing as I had bills to pay in hurry, I didn’t feel I could turn her down.”

“Do you like it?”

“Beggars can’t be choosers.” She kicked a stone with a little more viciousness than she’d planned.

“So find another job.”

“In case you haven’t noticed, jobs aren’t exactly growing on trees these days, and lawyers are graduating at record rates.”

He angled himself in front of her and stopped, frowning. “I remember you lecturing Logan back in high school about how he could do anything he set his mind to. So can you. Don’t let your ex or his family stop you from getting what you want. Explain to whoever you want to work with about what you’ve been doing, and how Lewis’s family is refusing to give you references. I’ll bet a lot of them have been through divorces or represented clients and have seen similar tactics. Hell, sue their asses for...I don’t know, defamation or something. You’re the lawyer, not me.” He cupped her jaw, the fierceness in his expression holding caught in his gaze. “Be strong. Don’t let anyone stop you from being who or what you want. Even me.”

Her breath hitched at his passionate reminder. It had been a long time since any one had believed in her like that. Fifteen years to be precise. Unable to deal with the emotions swirling inside her, she took his hand and dragged him down the path.

At the next pasture, three mares, one heavily pregnant, stopped their grazing to raise their heads and watch them pass. After ordering the dogs to sit beside Allie, Ben diverted from their path to call to one of them. “Hey, Miree, how you doin’, momma?”

The pregnant mare flicked her ears and wandered toward him. Allie never saw Ben reach into his pocket but he suddenly had a carrot stick in his hand.

“That’s my girl.” Once Miree had taken the treat, he lovingly stroked her neck.

Allie climbed onto the wooden fence and perched on the top rung. “I used to dream of them, you know.”