Something Old (35 page)

Katy considered the implications of the little girl’s question. Had her interviewer been married twice? She searched his face and then quickly scanned the room for photos, trying to piece the puzzle together.

Next, the doorbell chimed.

“Excuse me.” Harry Chalmers rose. His son took a fearful look at Jake and churned his little legs, running after his dad.

Once the family had left the room, Katy looked at Jake and shrugged. He seemed as uneasy as she. From the entryway, angry voices carried into the great room. Jake patted her hand. The voices escalated.

“But I want to go with Mommy, too,” the little boy begged.

“No, it’s not your turn today.”

Then an older boy, whom they hadn’t seen yet, entered the room from the direction of the entryway. He was almost as tall as his father and wore jeans and a black T-shirt. He was using an iPod and halted when he saw them sitting on the couch. Then he hitched up his backpack and strode past them with a curious look. Once he reached the stairway, he bounded up to the second level and disappeared, but Katy heard him slam a door.

The situation grew increasingly uncomfortable with Harry and the children’s mother still arguing in the entryway. The little boy increased his cries whenever his parents allowed a silent moment. It seemed Harry wanted her to take all the children at the same time, and she wanted to spend quality time with each one. Harry claimed she just wanted to make it hard for him to have any time to go out with his friends. He accused her of being jealous of his secretary and trying to control his life. He didn’t sound like a grieving widower. Their youngest son’s cries suddenly drowned out their conversation.

Jake squeezed her hand. “Sorry,” he whispered.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” she whispered back. “We can’t leave; they’re blocking the entrance.”

“Let’s wait.” His Dutch accent thickened. “Maybe Chalmers will enlighten us about his personal situation. Otherwise, this is not the job for you.”

Before Katy could decide if Jake was overstepping his bounds by saying the job was not for her, Harry rejoined them, carrying his son. The little boy struggled in his father’s arms, his face tear-streaked. When the boy calmed a bit, Harry gave Katy a sheepish grin. “Sorry about all that.” Then his voice hardened. “She’s such a—” But his voice broke off, as if he suddenly realized he didn’t want to speak harshly of the woman in front of his son. Or perhaps in front of strangers, for the couple had been arguing in front of the children. Shoulders slumped, he tenderly patted the little boy’s back.

When she felt Harry intended to let the matter drop, Katy withdrew her hand from Jake’s and squared her shoulders. “Normally, I don’t pry into personal affairs, but under the circumstances…well your ad stated you were a widower.”

Harry placed his son on the floor and ruffled his hair. “Your brother’s home. Why don’t you scoot up and say hi?”

The boy nodded and tramped partway upstairs. Then he turned back and jutted his lower lip out. “I wanted to go with Mommy.” He swiped his forearm across his eyes and sullenly went up the stairs.

With a sigh, Harry sank back onto the sofa. “Okay, look. I’m not a widower. I’m divorced. I haven’t been having any luck getting a housekeeper. I just thought if I implied I was a widower, it might help. I can’t afford an agency. The divorce really cost me. I’m a good guy. You’d be safe working here. We need help. But I can only pay ten dollars.”

Katy met Harry’s gaze, unswayed by his sentimental act. “Implied? You gave me false information.”

“I just thought that once you met me, you’d see I was a good guy.”

She narrowed her eyes, wondering if that was what his secretary thought. Then she snatched her references off the coffee table and stood. Jake quickly jumped to his feet, and reassuringly, touched her elbow.

“I can’t accept the position,” Katy said. “It’s not about the money anymore. But if you lied to me once, I don’t feel I can trust you.”

“But you can trust me.”

Did all men think trust could be earned so flippantly? She wanted to add that she didn’t like the way he’d looked her over, either. Instead, she said, “I’m sorry, Mr. Chalmers.”

He rose, following them to the door. “You’re sure? I wouldn’t even be here. The kids, either. You’d have the place entirely to yourself.”

She hesitated. That did sound inviting. Her gaze swept over the grand entry, taking in the elegant furnishings and marble floor, but her heart sank when she felt uneasiness in her stomach and recognized the little warning voice. This time she listened to it. “I’m sorry.”

Chalmers opened the door, and they stepped into the sunny March afternoon. Jake matched her hurried strides.

“Good choice. I didn’t like him,” he said. “I didn’t like the way he looked at you. Especially after what his ex said about his secretary.” So she hadn’t imagined that. But while Jake intended to show his support, he made her feel worse, reminding her of how deceptive a man could be. This new peek into the outsiders’ ways disturbed her peace of mind.

Jake opened the truck door for her, and she climbed up into the cab. As soon as he jumped up and seated himself behind the wheel, he went on, “We’ll put another ad online. I know there’s the perfect job out there for you.”

“No. This isn’t working out.”

Jake turned the key, and his truck rumbled to life, but he let it idle while he studied Katy. There was an edge to the tone of her voice that insinuated more than disappointment. She had shot the remark at him as if she were speaking of their relationship and not the computer ad service. As soon as she’d gotten inside the cab, she stiffened her shoulders and clenched her jaw, not looking his way but straight ahead out the windshield. No doubt, she blamed him for owning the computer that set up the failed interview.

How illogical. He’d only wanted to help her see that she needed to come out of the Dark Ages. He pulled onto the suburban street and glanced over again. Her shoulders had relaxed a bit so he tried to put it as logically as he could manage. “The point of job interviews is weeding out the undesirables. The right one will come along. There was no way of knowing that man was a liar.”

She turned glittering, brown eyes in his direction. “I should have known. He’s an outsider.”

Again, her frustration seemed personally directed at him. “That’s rather harsh.”

“Is it? Or are you so close to…them…that you can’t see the difference anymore?”

How did Katy always manage to turn everything inside out and hurl it back at him? “But you like your job at the Brooks. There are a lot of good outsiders, Katy. Good jobs waiting for you.”

Her jaw dropped open momentarily. Then she flew into a passionate protest. “Surely you know how many struggles I’ve had with the Brooks’ job? It’s tested me in every aspect of my faith.”

He quirked his mouth, trying to lighten her mood. “And that’s a bad thing?”

“Of course it is,” she snapped.

Her narrow-mindedness was increasingly irritating. “I disagree. It’s how I found my faith.”

“At the expense of others. Your little fling caused damage, Jake. How can you be so flippant?”

Her retort cut deeply. He braked for a light, hurt that she felt the need to continually punish him. He lived with the pain of his sister’s rebellion and of the damaged relationship with Katy. He had already bared his past like an open book, hoping she would understand that he hadn’t intentionally set out to hurt her. But Katy wouldn’t forgive him or believe that he’d changed. She kept ripping open the old wounds. She would never let them heal. It was unfair.

He slapped the steering wheel with both palms, and then gripped it firmly. “You think you are so perfect, living your self-righteous life. But I’m not your puppet, and I don’t want a mean-spirited woman.”

Her eyes widened and her sulky lower lip dropped. Then suddenly her nostrils flared. “Right. I remember your type.”

“At least Jessie was an honest person. She didn’t pretend. She was kind and fun to be around. You may look good on the outside, but you have an unforgiving heart.”

“Don’t try to put the blame on me. You
are
just like Tammy, trying to get your own way and not caring how it affects people around you.”

Jake laughed out loud in disbelief. Katy crossed her arms and jerked her gaze to stare out the passenger window. He shook his head. No use in talking to someone so stubborn and deceived. They drove in charged silence until they reached the doddy house.

He hurt bad inside because he knew this time there would be no reconciliation. They’d spoken words they could never retract. He needed to say something before she jumped out of the truck. He reached over tentatively and touched her arm.

She looked up at him, the stubborn set of her face slackened lightly, and he glimpsed something vulnerable. Somewhere in there was the woman he had once known. That was the woman he loved. He wanted nothing more than to lean over and kiss her. But she’d forbidden that, hadn’t she? She’d kissed David, but she refused him. His pride swelled, and his resolve hardened. This woman was impervious, and he just didn’t have the heart for it anymore, so he told her what she’d been trying to tell him all along. “You’re right. It’s not going to work between us. We’ve both changed. I’m sorry.”

She yanked her arm away. “I’m sure it won’t take you long to find a woman on
the Internet.
Somebody who understands you. Or maybe Jessie will take you back.” Tears streaming down her cheeks, Katy jerked the door handle and jumped out. In her wake, the door slammed and shook the cab.

He refused to watch her walk away and kept his gaze straight ahead. It was all he could do not to spin his tires in the gravel. In his mind’s eye, he could see her marching to the doddy house. Stubborn, foolish woman who made him furious. If he had a hammer in his hand, he would surely demolish something.

Jake drove, hardly noticing the traffic signs, his mind churning with anger and guilt. Finally he pulled over, his wheels partly on the road and partly on a sloped embankment. He no longer felt like swinging a hammer; he felt like crumbling. He couldn’t talk to Chad or Cal. Guys didn’t take much to weakness, weren’t good at helping a guy deal with a broken heart. He’d never had one before, but he felt like he’d explode if somebody didn’t help him. He tried calling Lil, but she didn’t answer. For several minutes, he sat with his phone against his forehead. He tried again. Still no answer. Then he tried his sister. When she answered, he blurted out, “Katy and I broke up. Can I come over?”

“Sure. I’ll meet you outside the dorm.”

“Twenty-five minutes?”

“Okay.”

When Jake reached the southern edge of the manicured lawns and red-bricked university buildings, he calmed a bit. It helped just to get away from the country and everything that reminded him of Katy. He pulled to the side of the road in a no-parking zone and glanced at Canfield Hall, wondering if he should text Erin.

But then he saw her standing on the sidewalk near the residence halls. When she started running toward him, he jerked his gearshift in P
ARK
and jumped down out of the cab. Erin pulled him into a firm embrace.

“I’m so sorry,” she said.

He didn’t say anything. Erin knew how much he loved Katy. She’d conspired with him the afternoon of the ballet, jumping in to entertain Addison so that he could spend time with Katy. He clung tight to his little sister, leaning his head on top of hers. Just feeling the beat of her heart brought him a sense of assurance. Finally, Erin drew back, touched his cheek. “You can’t park here. Can we go someplace? Wanta go get coffee?”

“No.” He shook his head. “Someplace private.”

“Let’s go down to the lake.”

He agreed, and at Mirror Lake, they found a vacant bench, but the location probably wasn’t ideal. Many lovers strolled through the park, reminding him of his great loss.

He slunk forward. “It’s over.”

“You want to tell me what happened?”

“She’ll never forgive me. She thinks I’m contaminated. Says my falling away has done irreparable damage to others.” He looked at Erin, and her face had paled. Yet he needed to get it all out. “She’s right. Because of me, she’s changed. I’ve ruined her.”

Erin sucked in a deep breath. “No. She’s responsible for who she is. She can’t blame you for that.” Erin brushed his hair with her hand. “I don’t understand why she can’t see how you’ve changed.”

He shrugged. “You’re the one taking psychology. The thing is, I want the old Katy. It’s hopeless. All we do is fight when we’re together.”

Erin rubbed her forehead with a ringed hand. She lifted her gaze out across the water. “This is awful,” she said. “I thought Katy would take you back.”

He stared at his sister, who had changed so much in the past six months. She dressed in jeans and wore jewelry and makeup. Although her hair was still long, in many ways she resembled Jessie. He grabbed her by her upper arms. “The Bible’s right about one thing.”

“What?” she asked, widening her eyes.

“We reap what we sow. Erin, don’t let the same thing happen to you. Promise me, you won’t let your falling away ruin your life.”

“You’re scaring me. Your life’s not ruined.” She cupped his face with her hands. “It’s all reversible, right?”