Somewhere in His Arms (18 page)

             
Lucy hadn’t heard anything from her dearly departed husband since that debacle in Rudy’s living room. She could only surmise it had something to do with the marriage itself. He probably wanted to arrange an annulment. A divorce would be too messy, even though she wanted nothing from him. A mere mention of the baby he put inside her body? Maybe. But she wouldn’t count on it.

             
She hugged her knees to her chest and tried not to let her nerves get the best of her. Lucy wondered what he’d been doing these past few weeks all by his lonesome while she’d been a nervous wreck. She thought it hysterical that she was married to a man that she knew absolutely nothing about. He could be a serial killer for all she knew! Ugh! What if he was some sort of escapee from a mental hospital--or horror of all horrors--a convict? Her frazzled mind ran the gamut of possible scenarios in which her soon to be ex-husband was a spy, a chef, or her personal favorite...an actor

             
It would certainly explain his duplicity. After all, actors were professional liars. She’d learned that the hard way what with Vivian’s revolving carousel of hunks-of-the month. There’d been so many in and out of the house over the years that Lucy had lost count. Some had been friendly, while others had not. Bile suddenly rose in her gullet at one particular memory, and she quickly squelched and forced it to a dark corner of her mind.  

             
Lucy wondered how long Alec had known. She went over his behavior from the day they met till the day she left. While her memories of that night lay scattered in fractured dreams, Alec’s must have lain dormant until those last few weeks when his anger towards her had been at its zenith.

             
She’d never been able to grasp why Alec had suddenly become hostile, almost confrontational. Now she knew. Once he’d recovered the memory of that night, he must have regretted his hasty decision in marrying a complete stranger. When she remembered how he’d glared at her that morning, it sent cold chills down her spine. It was almost as if he...hated her.

             
Another cold chill tickled her back and she shivered, pulling her sweater closer about her. Lucy was becoming restless and nervously drummed her heels against the pavement. She checked her watch again. Nearly four. Maybe he decided against driving all this way just so they could hash out their differences. Maybe he decided it wasn’t worth the effort of easing her mind about the baby. Maybe, maybe, maybe....

             
She’d go mad trying to figure this out and winced as the little man in her skull began to wield his hammer. Her hands flew up to her temples in an effort to stave him off, but it was too late. The migraine was already rearing its ugly head. She needed to eat and soon. Cereal and milk just wouldn’t cut it this morning. Hopefully Alec would get her something to eat. Yeah, right! He probably would love to see her starve to death just so he wouldn’t have to worry about her or the baby. Lucy fumbled in her pocket to see how much cash she had on her.

             
Twenty bucks.             

             
The rest of her money she was saving for the trip east, but she decided she would splurge just this once. She hoped wherever Alec intended on taking her that they had an abundance of cheese. That’s all she’d been craving of late, rich globs of cheese and butter. If she kept this up they’d have to roll her down the tarmac!

             
It was nearly four-thirty. He wasn’t coming. Her heart sank and she stood to brush off the dirt, ready to face another bowl of cornflakes. Just as she turned to head back, a small black jeep rumbled forth, its headlights illuminating the darkness and jerked to a stop.

             
She stood for a moment blinking in confusion and then the door opened. Alec sat at the wheel, looking as if he longed to be far away from the horror. Lucy felt the same way, wanting to fly to some deserted island where she didn’t have to figure out the rest of her life.

             
Alec’s brusque greeting broke her reverie. “Get in.”

             
Shivering again, Lucy hopped up, ignoring the hand that was offered and settling herself into the leather seat. She tried to keep her wits about her as she fastened the seat belt with trembling hands and sat quietly listening to the idling engine. And then there was silence.

             
Oh, the silence! She hadn’t been this close to Alec since the night of the storm when they watched movies by candlelight. He was so close she could smell his aftershave and… he didn’t want her. Hot tears pricked her eyes and she willed them away. This was no time to be hormonal! Lucy straightened her shoulders and steeled herself for the inevitable.

             
“How’ve you been?” he blurted suddenly, his voice sounding like a machine gun, and startling her so much she nearly wet her pants.

             
She held her hands in her lap and tried to still her quivering limbs.
What the hell was the matter with her?
“I’ve been better,” she croaked through a dry throat, not wanting him to get off so lightly. “And you?”             

             
She squinted in the dark to get a better look at him. His hair and clothes were mussed and he sounded tired. “The same,” he muttered under his breath. “How’s the…um…baby...” he began with a nod in their baby’s general direction.

             
“Fine,” she murmured, placing a protective hand over her burgeoning belly. “We’re both fine. I-I have a picture if you’d like to see...” her voice trailed off as he turned away abruptly and stepped on the gas. He pulled out almost as if in a rage, gripping the wheel with both hands, and turning so sharply she had to grip the dashboard for support.

             
He didn’t speak as they sped along I-10, which was partially deserted save a few early risers who wanted to beat the morning rush. Lucy tried to make small talk, but the words caught in her throat when she caught a glance at his clenched jaw. She didn’t have much to say anyway.

             
Then the speeding glimmers of asphalt, and the intermittent flashes of headlights from passing cars distracted her eyes. Suddenly Lucy became aware of a very familiar burning sensation in the pit of her stomach. 

             
“Alec, stop,” she pleaded hoarsely and panicked when he did not. It was almost as if he didn’t hear her. “Alec...” she tried again. She let out a tortured groan and finally Alec turned toward her just in time. He quickly pulled over into the emergency lane, and Lucy clapped a hand over her mouth as he unbuckled her seat belt. As soon as she was free, she flung the door open nearly falling out in her haste, and sped over to the guardrail where she unceremoniously christened a pair of unfortunate cacti.

             
Just as the last of the spasms subsided, Lucy took a few deep-cleansing breaths to calm herself. She attempted to stand upright but found her legs wouldn’t cooperate; they wobbled like Jell-O. When her legs were finally ready, she tried again but tripped over her feet and slammed into something hard. A steadying arm was braced around her waist, and a cool cloth was swiped across her heated cheeks and brow.

             
Alec had come to her rescue at last, and she savored his gentle ministrations no matter how brief they might be.

             
She was still a little in awe of how tall he was, probably because he made her feel so vulnerable. The top of her head barely came to the middle of his chest, and Lucy leaned against him breathing in the soothing scents of soap and fabric softener. She stood still as he bathed her face and she longed for him to tell her that everything would be all right, that she wouldn’t have to go through this alone. But alas, that thought was just as fleeting as the arm around her waist.

             
Alec stepped away, clearing his throat. “Ready?” he asked gruffly, and handed her the cloth to finish wiping her face.

             
Lucy took the proffered cloth and followed behind him meekly, her eyes darting here and there in a sorry attempt to scavenge what remained of her pride. Finding none, she allowed him to help her into the jeep, and looked away as he fastened her seatbelt. She didn’t need a sign to tell her that this wasn’t going to end well. She closed her eyes, listening to the swooshing sounds of traffic, and the way Alec’s shoes crunched on the blacktop. He hopped in and started the engine. “Where to?” he asked casually.

             
The only thing she could think of at the moment was oatmeal.                            

             
“Swingers!” Lucy blurted through a mouth tasting like an old paste pot.

             
“W-What did you say?” Alec choked, mortified.

             
Lucy didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. “It’s a diner,” she explained, trying to stifle a fit of hysterical laughter. “On Beverly Boulevard. I need to eat to settle my stomach.”

             
“Right,” he breathed, slightly disconcerted as he drove off. He didn’t speak to her for the remainder of their trip.

             
Lucy didn’t mind; she was beginning to suspect there wouldn’t be much pleasant conversation where they were headed. She closed her eyes and nodded off until Alec startled her with his sudden announcement, “We’re here.”

             
She waited patiently as he killed the engine and walked around to her side to help her out. Lucy didn’t want to touch him and brushed his hand away and hopped down unassisted. She allowed him to steer her into the brightly lit diner and into a corner booth, away from the scattered groups of exhausted college students studying for finals and the inebriated few who were nursing a nasty hangover.

             
Lucy was still cold and she huddled deeper into her sweater. She finally got a chance to get a good look at Alec. From under long lashes she studied her future ex-husband. Is that what he was? She wasn’t sure. The reluctant father of her unborn child? Probably.

             
He looked none too pleased to be here that much was certain, though no less magnificent than before, he exuded a certain weariness; a faded soul so to speak. His hair was tousled as if he’d just gotten out of bed, and he had at least three days growth of a new beard. He also looked like he’d thrown on whatever happened to be lying around, which was a gray Oxford University hoodie that had seen better days, and a pair of black sweatpants. Dark circles rimmed the bloodshot eyes, and the corners of that chiseled mouth drooped ever so slightly as if he’d tasted something very unpleasant. Was Alec given to drink? She hoped not, she needed him sober...for now.

             
“A-Are you all right, Alec?” she dared to ask. He didn’t look up and seemed intent on reading the menu to death.  “Alec...?”

             
“Hmm....?” he looked up startled to find his wife staring at him with concern etched on her beautiful face.
His wife!
That was a new one on him. His wife and with a child growing in her belly! What the bloody hell was he going to do with a wife and baby? He’d give anything for the answer. If only it was as simple as playing happy families. But life was much more brutal than that, and he didn’t want Lucy in the crosshairs. “Did you…um… say... something?”

             
She didn’t know what the hell was going on with him, but at the moment she really couldn’t give a rat’s ass. She had her own problems, and the sooner they hashed this whole mess out, the better. “Are you ready to order?” Lucy asked instead, fighting an overwhelming urge to smack him upside the head with the sugar dispenser.

             
“Huh? Oh, right...you first,” he offered graciously, and sat back as the waitress took Lucy’s order of Irish oatmeal with brown sugar and milk with a side of toast and a cup of green tea. "I’ll have toast and coffee--black,” he told the girl who was making cow eyes at him. His wife rolled her eyes in disgust and nibbled on a saltine cracker.

             
Neither spoke as they waited for breakfast. Lucy couldn’t think of anything this stressful aside from her mother’s funeral. She kept wondering when Alec was going to stop beating around the bush and get to the nitty-gritty. She had no qualms about an annulment. What if he thought she was going to sue for child support? The money would be nice, but she was more than prepared to go this alone if she had to and with each passing minute of Alec’s silence, it was appearing more and more a possibility.

             
“Rudy tells me you aren’t on speaking terms,” he began, and startled Lucy so much that she tipped her water glass.

             
“We had words,” she said tersely, blotting up the puddle and wanted to leave it at that but Alec decided that this was the perfect opportunity to be chatty.

             
“About...what?” he persisted. “He’s been in an awful snit trying to get a hold of you.”

             
“I’m sure,” she mumbled and munched on another dry saltine. “Leave it, Alec,” she warned, not feeling in the best mood to listen to him pontificate about Rudy’s self-flagellation.

             
“Wanna talk about it?”