Sophie's Heart (61 page)

Tory’s eyes shot to her sister and then down to her plate. By now the whole table was watching her.

“Is there something you want to tell us, Tory?” Alec’s voice was a mixture of invitation and command.

“No,” she whispered.

“Are you certain?”

Again, Tory only moved her head, her eyes looking frightened yet defensive.

“Are you going to call Sophie, Dad?” Craig asked.

Alec shook his head. “She left me a note saying she was going to take next week off.”

“If she left you a note,” Tory now spoke, “why did you ask us about her?”

“Because she doesn’t say why she isn’t eating with us.”

“Maybe she has a date,” Tory said softly, but with a stubborn look on her face. Again all eyes looked at her.

“Tory,” Craig began, but Alec stopped him.

“Let’s clean up the dishes” was all Alec said.

Everyone rose willingly, but all were quiet. The work was done in an orderly fashion and, when everyone began to go in all directions, Alec snatched Tory into his arms. He hugged her close and then tossed her over his shoulder and carried her into the living room. When he had sat in the big chair, Tory in his lap, he spoke.

“What’s up, Tory?”

For a few minutes she didn’t look at him. Alec didn’t press her, but waited patiently, praying fervently that she would talk to him.

“I don’t want things to change,” she finally admitted.

“What’s going to change?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t want you to marry anyone, and I want Sophie to stay here and take care of us. Why can’t it be that way?”

“I understand how you feel, Tory, but I want you to think about how selfish that is.”

“I’m not being selfish,” Tory protested. “I think you are.”

“Why am I being selfish?”

“Because you want everything to change when it’s fine the way it is.”

Alec sighed. It would be so easy to argue with her, but this would accomplish nothing.

“Why don’t we talk next week at this time. All right, Tory?”

She had been expecting a lecture, so she frowned.

“Why next week?” she asked.

“Because then we will have had a week without Sophie. If you don’t want me to see Sophie anymore, I won’t. But I want you to think about it for a week.”

“You mean,” Tory said now, “if I ask you not to marry Sophie, you won’t?”

“That’s right, Tory,” he told her gently. “You mean that much to me.”

He could see that he had shocked her. She started to speak several times, but just shook her head and laid it against his chest.

Do you know, Tory, just how much I love you? I see my sister’s face when I look at you, and my heart always turns over with love. I believe with all of my heart that Sophie should be a part of our family, but I won’t rush you. Please, Lord, help me to handle this. I want above all else to walk with Your blessing. I will stay away as Sophie asked, but I ask You to show me in Your time.

“I love you, Dad,” Tory suddenly said, and Alec hugged her close.

“I love you, Tory, and I always will.”

They hugged again, and Alec once again prayed for strength. He knew with a certainty that he was headed into a difficult week. Sophie had become a part of him. Had he missed the needs of his children because of her? He didn’t think so, but he simply had to be there for Tory right now.

Please, Lord,
he prayed one last time.
Please let Tory miss Sophie as much as I do already. Please give her a longing that will soften her heart.

“Well, Tory,” Sophie spoke with pleasure on Sunday morning. “How are you?”

“I’m fine,” the little girl said, but looked uncomfortable and wished she’d used the other bathroom. She remembered very well the things she had said to Sophie and still felt ashamed.

“Do you have something fun planned for Labor Day?”

“I don’t think so,” she said and mentally squirmed.

They fell quiet for just a moment.

“Well, I better get to Sunday school.” Sophie could see the girl’s discomfort and knew she had to let her go. “ ’Bye, Tory.”

“ ’Bye.”

Sophie slipped away, but Tory stood still. For the moment she forgot she had to go to the bathroom and that she had to get to Sunday school as well. She did miss Sophie. She missed her something awful. But she still knew that if her father married Sophie, Tory would feel as if she had betrayed her mom. Tears rushed to Tory’s eyes at the thought, and she wiped them away. She then rushed into the stall and ran off to class before she was late. It was not the start of a great day or a great week.

Rita had refused to take anyone home. She had come to Middleton Christian School, picked up Craig and Tory, and then gone directly to Woodman’s. Neither of her siblings had wanted to grocery shop, so they both sat in the van. Rita had not been too happy with them, but she was inside filling the list now. Tory was angry at Craig for the way he had treated her the day before when she’d asked him to watch “The Price is Right” with her, so the atmosphere inside the van was decidedly cool.

Everyone had been so busy. Tory thought that Labor Day was a day to run and play, but her father had worked on the house and yard until late in the afternoon, and Craig and Rita had both pursued their own interests. Suddenly, Tory couldn’t take the quiet any longer. She knew how Rita would answer the question in her mind, so she had to ask Craig before her sister returned.

“Craig, do you want Dad to marry Sophie?”

Craig looked at her. “I didn’t at first,” he admitted, “but I do now.”

“Why?”

Craig shrugged. “I like Sophie a lot, and I can’t stand the thought of Dad being alone.”

“But he has us, Craig.”

“Right now he does. It might seem like a long time to you, Tory, but it’s not. In ten years we’ll all be gone. Even you’ll be in college or married. I mean, Rita’s a senior and already applying to colleges. In ten years Dad will be alone. He needs Sophie, and she needs him.”

He hadn’t sounded angry or accusatory, but Tory still turned tear-filled eyes to the window. She felt so betrayed. That was exactly what Rita had said, and somehow she had believed Craig would be on her side. For an instant she tried to see her father alone. It wasn’t easy because she always saw herself with him. But she gained a sudden glimpse and had to push it away or sob with the pain it brought. She barely got herself under control before Rita came back. Anxious to be home, Craig jumped out to help load the groceries, but Tory remained in her seat where she sat quietly all the way home.

Sophie had a pretty quiet week herself. She spent some time with the Kents, but all in all, she was alone. There were times in her life when she could have said she was alone, but not lonely; she had known real loneliness this week. She missed Alec and the children almost more than she could bear. She knew her decision to take the week off was good and right, but it was not easy. By Thursday she was ready to throw in the towel.

Tory had been heavy on her heart the entire week, and Thursday was especially intense. Sophie spent much of the day praying for her. She didn’t know why, but the little girl was constantly in her mind. Had Sophie been able to see what was going on at the supper table that night, she would have gone to her immediately.

As it was, Tory sat feeling alone and miserable and did little more than pick at her food. Alec did not comment, but prayed that his daughter would come to him. It was tempting to press her, especially since she did not look well, but he only ate his meal, prayed, and debated what to do next.

The meal ended before he could make a solid decision, and the only thing he concluded was that he would stay close to Tory this night. He need not have worried. She shadowed him from the end of supper till bedtime. He tried off and on to engage her in conversation, but her monosyllabic answers did not encourage him. He was careful to keep his expression open, however, and by the time Alec told Tory to get ready for bed, it paid off.

“Can I talk to you, Dad?”

“Sure, Tory.” Alec stopped what he was doing and turned to her.

She licked her lips several times as though nervous, but actual words took some time.

“Both Craig and Rita have told me that we’ll all be gone someday, but I didn’t believe them.”

Alec nodded, but Tory didn’t continue.

“And how do you feel now?”

Tears filled her eyes. “My teacher said something today that no one’s ever said. She said, ‘Tory, you would make a great teacher, because you explain things so well.’ And well, I thought about it all morning. I mean, I dreamed of how cool it would be to have my own class, and then I remembered you.”

She was crying now, but she kept on. “Both Craig and Rita said that in ten years we would be gone. We would be at college or married, and I didn’t believe them because I’d decided I was going to be here with you forever. Then there I was, teaching a class in my mind and everyone calling me Miss Riley, and using chalk and—”

She was nearly gagging on her tears now, and Alec moved so that he could pull her onto the sofa with him. He cuddled her close against his side, and Tory sobbed into his shirt. Rita slipped into the family room and put a box of tissues on the table and then shot out again. Tory never saw her, but Alec snatched one from the box and pressed it into Tory’s hands.

“Rita said I was selfish, but I didn’t believe her. And now Sophie’s been alone all week, and I haven’t been able to talk to her. Rita doesn’t do things like Sophie does, and Craig leaves more messes in the kitchen and in the bathroom when Sophie’s not around.”

“So you just want Sophie back to keep things clean?”

Tory tipped her head back to see her father’s face.

“No, I want her back because I miss her as much as I miss Mom. I can’t do anything about Mom, but if I could apologize to Sophie, she might come back.”

Alec wanted very much to ask what she needed to apologize over, but forced himself not to.

“And what about Sophie and me, Tory? How do you feel about that?”

She cried a little more. “I still think Mom will be hurt, but I don’t want you to be alone.”

“Tory, what do you mean?”

The story came out then. Tory told her father that she believed her mother could see them and would be hurt, so Alec was given the chance to assure her very gently that this would not be the case. He told her that Vanessa was very busy praising and serving God, and that she understood like never before how God was the One in control.

“So you see, Tory,” he finished, “your mother is not up there trying to do God’s job. God placed Sophie in our lives for a purpose, and if God does discuss it with your mom, He’ll tell her that Sophie loves us and takes good care of us. But most of all, God will be able to assure your mother that Sophie loves Him and wants to serve Him with her whole heart. Your mother would never be hurt or object to that.”

Tory needed to cry some more, but these were tears of relief. She asked herself why she hadn’t talked to her dad earlier. He had made it so clear, and Tory’s little heart was comforted for the first time in many weeks.

“I want to talk to her, Dad. I want to talk with Sophie.”

“I know, Tory, but I’ll tell you what we’re going to have to do. We’re going to have to wait until Saturday. Sophie asked for some time and, as hard as that is, I want to give it to her. On Saturday morning I’ll go and see Sophie and bring her here. How will that be?”