Soul Conquered (11 page)

I reach for the door and hear something behind me. I
spin around, and it takes a moment to realize what’s different. Randy’s
missing. He must’ve slid beneath the water in the tub!

Damn it all. I run over to the tub and reach blindly
beneath the bubbling liquid, groping until I find arms. Then I pull, heaving
with all my strength and trying to keep my footing on the slippery steps. I
adjust my stance so that I can grip Randy beneath both armpits as I pull him farther
above the water level. He starts to cough, and his muscles tense and jerk, not
understanding what’s happening. He twists hard, and I fly right inside the
Jacuzzi on top of him. Water squirts up my nose, and I cough and gasp as I
fight to find my footing. In moments we’re both standing in the center of the
oversize tub, bubbles rushing over our thighs. Randy holds me tight to him as we
both catch our breath.

“Are you okay?” I ask finally. My heart beats like a
jackhammer against his slick, hard chest, but he keeps hold of me like he’s
afraid to let go.

“
Me
? Are you okay? Were you trying to surprise
me or something? Because I’m surprised.”

I have to laugh at his expression. “You slipped under.
You fell asleep waiting for me. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, baby, nothing to be sorry about. You’re here
now, and I like the outfit, if I may say so.”

“Oh.” I shift awkwardly as he holds me at arm’s length
for just long enough to get a good look. “See, that’s the thing, Randy. I just
came over here to save you. You fell under the—”

Randy pulls me in again and covers my mouth with his.
His tongue glides into my mouth, and his hand presses me close, which might be
nice if I actually wanted to kiss him, but right now I just feel trapped. I
hate to use my Demon strength, but it looks like I’ll have to again.

I put my hands on his shoulders and shove, but nothing
happens. Meanwhile, his free hand explores more of my body, and I don’t think
he’s paying any attention to my actual body language.

Lucifer’s voice sounds in my head.
He’s had a lot
to drink tonight, too. He followed your lead. You can’t really blame him for
misreading the signs.

I stiffen as the reality hits me. Lucifer’s taken my
Demon powers long enough to make sure this happens. He’s also trying to take
away my choice in the matter. Randy wouldn’t do that, though. Not if he
understood. I know that much about him. I have to tell him no.

I struggle against him, but he seems to think I’m
urging him on because he’s managed to relieve me of my top with one hand. I try
to turn my head so that I can speak but find that Lucifer’s also stolen my
voice. Panic starts to set in as he moves his mouth down my body. I try to turn
and get out, but my legs are stuck to the bottom of the Jacuzzi like they’ve
been cemented there, and my wriggling is once again egging him on.

Tears flow from my eyes from fear and frustration as I
try to yank Randy back up or poke him hard, but my body won’t obey. When I
touch him, it’s only softly, and my hands linger longer than I want them to,
sending him the wrong message.

Lucifer laughs in my head.
Relax, Grace, I bet he’s
better than Josh. You should test the waters a little while you two are on the
outs.

I yell back in my head.
I’m not doing this
willingly. You haven’t succeeded.

But my pulse and my tears tell a different story as
Randy works his way back up my body from behind.
I don’t blame Randy,
either,
I shout inside my head.
I forgive him because I know it’s you
that’s doing this.
You’re
raping me, Lucifer. Are you even allowed to do
that?

It’s a desperate call and my last option. But
Lucifer’s silence gives me hope despite Randy still hugging me from behind and
kissing my neck. Still, I’m stuck. I can’t protest or move other than in ways
that encourage him to keep going.

Help! Josh, help me! Please, Mr. Griffith! Someone!

“Oh, relax,” Lucifer says from right in front of the
Jacuzzi. It’s then that I realize Randy’s frozen behind me, still attached to
my neck in a rather awkward position. “If I want someone to rape you, Grace, it
won’t be this pleasant. Remember, it’s your choice, but you have your orders,
and your punishment for disobeying will come directly after your visit with your
brother tomorrow. It all depends on whether you misbehave right now. In fact,
I’ll make it even easier for you to choose correctly.”

Lucifer’s fathomless black eyes capture mine and pain
sears through every inch of my flesh. It’s a reminder of what I’m in for. Is
this supposed to make it an easier choice?

Lucifer disappears, and Randy comes back to life. That
same scent wafts up and surrounds me like a comforting hug, and again I yearn
for Josh.

I want him so bad that when Randy spins me around,
it’s Josh’s body I feel against mine, and I keep my eyes closed for just one
moment more as his lips tease mine, just like Josh’s do when we kiss. I melt
into him, willingly this time, wrapping my arms around him and tangling my
fingers in his curls.

Wait.

I open my eyes and blink. It’s Josh that I’m standing
with in the tub. He’s the one naked and pressed against me. Kissing me.
Embracing me. The sheer giddiness of the moment propels me farther into his
arms for the kiss. I jump up and wrap my legs around him, tears of joy flowing
over my cheeks.

“Oh, Grace.”

But when I hear Randy’s voice and not Josh’s, I
realize this is what Lucifer meant by making it easier. It’s not real. It isn’t
my Josh. It’s still just Randy.

Randy kissing me.

Randy touching me.

Randy ready to make love to me.

But it would be so easy to pretend. It would feel so
good to be with Josh again, even if it’s not real. And would it be so horrible
to make Randy happy and appease Lucifer?

Josh—Randy—walks out of the tub with me
still wrapped around him. We drip our way over the carpet to the sofa where he
lays me back and then slides over me, our skin slippery and hot from the
Jacuzzi.

He tastes like Josh.

He feels like Josh.

But he isn’t Josh.

He positions himself over me, and I roll quickly to
the side and off the sofa. “Stop,” I say.

“Babe?”

When I look again, it’s Randy’s dark, glistening face
that greets me. His expression is almost pained.

I cringe. “I’m so sorry. I can’t. I can’t do this. I
love someone else.”

Randy stares at me for a minute, and I twist a wet
curl around my finger as we continue to drip water all over the sofa and floor.

“I hope you can forgive me.” My voice is hoarse, but
at least it’s finally mine to control.

“Babe, I don’t know what kind of game you’re playing,
but this is not cool.” It’s the first time I’ve heard anger come from Randy.

“It’s not a game. It never was. And I really am sorry.
I didn’t mean to lead you on—”

“‘Didn’t mean to’?” He laughs. “Really? That’s… Yeah.
What are you on?”

“Nothing. I was trying to apologize, but you know
what? Just go on with your life. Have fun. No harm done.” I turn around and move
toward the door.

“Are you crazy?” Randy grabs my arm before I can get
there. “You can’t go out like that. Put on some clothes, at least.” He rubs his
hands down over his face. “Damn, girl, you a psycho or something?”

I sigh. How do I explain that the Devil removed all my
clothes? “Just don’t worry about it. It’s not your problem.”

“Grace, you are one crazy girl.” Randy kicks the sofa,
and I jump a little. “Damn. This is not how tonight was supposed to go.”

He moves toward me, and I back away a little toward
the door. “I’m sorry, Randy.”

“Where are you gonna go like that?” he asks as I
finally make it as far as twisting the knob.

I hesitate, then dive out into the hall, letting the
heavy door shut behind me. Tears stream down my face yet again, but this time
they’re accompanied by manic laughter in my head. I’m going to be tortured
tomorrow in some horrible and unfathomable way. But it’s okay. I finally stood
up for what was right.

Score one for Grace Howard.

Keira

I’m no longer in the Pit, and
yet I still feel it. Horrific images plague my thoughts. I may as well still be
there in the darkness. And there’s pain. So much pain. The sounds of suffering
scrape at my ears.

I rock back and forth on Noah’s floor, hugging my
knees to my chest, trying to erase it, or at least shove it down inside with
the other retched memories I’ve tried to forget.

Noah touches me, his hair mussed and his brow creased
with worry. I snatch my arm away and immediately regret it. For a moment, I
forgot where I was.
Who
I was.

“Keira?” he asks, carefully.

I stop rocking and press my eyes closed.

“Talk to me, babe. Tell me what happened.” He scoots closer;
I can feel it even though he refrains from touching me again.

I shake my head. I don’t want him to know. Not now, not
ever.

“I know he hurt you. I will never forgive him for
that. I promise you, I will make him pay.”

I whimper at his words. They’re poison. You can’t best
the Devil. Oh, Noah. You’re heading for disaster, and I can’t save you. No one
can. Not even Grace.

“Lucifer’s not listening, I can tell. Relax. At least
let me hold you.”

I nod and let Noah pull me onto his lap and close his
strong arms around me. I lay my head against his shoulder and inhale his scent,
feel his unshaven face scratch against my head. The shaking stops. This is
warm. This is safe. It may be an illusion, but it’s an illusion I can believe
in for a minute. And it’s the exact opposite of the place I was.

This is Heaven. It must be.

But then how could Grace have ever left?

“Noah,” I whisper against the skin of his neck.
“Please don’t fight him.”

Noah holds me tighter but turns to look into my eyes.
“I won’t let this stand. I can’t. Keira, before I met you I had nothing to
fight for. Nothing to live for. Just a big chip on my shoulder because I felt
cheated. But now?” He smiles, and my heart both swells and sinks as he tilts my
chin up. His mouth is a breath away.

“Now?” I ask.

“Now I see the truth. I don’t think you see it,
though. You’ve been through too much. Grace doesn’t, either. In fact, I don’t
think Lucifer even sees it.”

I’d ask what truth he’s talking about, but it doesn’t
matter because no one can beat Lucifer at his own game. Especially not a mortal.
“You’re…human.” I carefully omit the word ‘just’ from the sentence.

Noah’s eyes are sharp and his smile, breathtaking.
He’s beautiful. He should be an Angel.

“Yeah. I am. And I think that’s exactly why I’m
needed.”

I want to beat my fists into his chest until he sees
how ludicrous that is. But his lips find mine, and instead I put all the
passion and frustration into the kiss. I climb over him, knocking him onto the
ground, kissing him back, both of us fierce and determined to make it count.

I’m wild, even for me. But he meets my enthusiasm with
equal fervor as we devour each other. His skin is hot, almost feverish, and I
soak in it, trying to erase the obscene cold of the Pit.

I touch and kiss every inch of him, memorizing every
curve and muscle. Every beautiful and tender human bit. We roll over and over
again, tangled and twisted, lit only by the moonlight shining through the slats
in his blinds. I land on top of him and reach up to hang on to the throne
behind his head, accidentally tearing through the leather in the heat of my
passion.

Lucifer won’t like that,
I think
as I settle back into Noah’s arms, satisfied. Maybe I’m destined to suffer in the
depths of Hell, but at least I also get to touch Heaven.

Josh

The gates tower above everything,
glistening in the diffused light of Heaven’s glow. Souls appear at the
entrance, confused and awed, where Angels greet them and introduce them to
their new afterlives.

It’s a sight I could care less about, but I know it
meant something to Grace. To me, the pain and confusion of death are best left
to others, and besides, the fluffy white mist curling around my legs annoys the
crap out of me.

The minute this thought occurs to me, the mist
dissipates around my body and swirls out of my way as I walk forward, like I
have an invisible shield around me. Another perk of Heaven, I suppose. I’d
rather have Grace back.

“Josh?” Shona separates from a young boy of about
eleven in golden robes. “Go ahead and take the next entry, Kobe,” she says to the
kid. “You’ve got this!”

The boy nods and smiles, giving her a thumbs-up before
turning toward an elderly Indian man in a turban who’s just stumbled through
the gate.

“Don’t tell me you’re here to learn to be a greeter?”
Shona asks.

“Funny!” I say, full of sarcasm. “No. I’m here because
I talked to Mr. Griffith, and I’m done trying to make sense of everything or
find some magic solution. Archangels and humans—it’s a bunch of bullshit.
They aren’t any better or that much different than us as far as I can tell.”

“Whoa. Slow down there,” Shona whispers, pulling me to
the side to make sure no one’s listening. “I take it you didn’t like what he
had to say.”

“No. I didn’t. And it all comes down to The Man
Upstairs—um, that wasn’t meant to be a pun.”

Shona smiles and adjusts her glasses.

“I asked how to talk to Him, and Mr. Griffith told me
to pray.
Pray
, Shona. I’m already a frickin’ Angel. If He was interested
in making sure good people didn’t suffer, then He’d already have done
something. I mean, do we even know He exists?” My hair is sticking out at crazy
angles because I keep pulling my hands through it.

“Josh, I know you’re upset, but let’s not go down the
road of blasphemy, eh?”

I sigh. “All I’m saying is that I’m sick of sitting
around and trying to research some loophole. I’m going to do something.”

“Like what?” Shona challenges, crossing her arms and
cocking her head.

I shuffle my feet on the spongy white ground, trying
to think of a good answer. All I know is that I need to do
something
—something
to alleviate this frustration. Something other than tearing my hair out. “I
don’t know. Go smack some sense into Noah, for starters.”

“You can’t touch him, remember? That could easily be
literal, Josh.”

“Then what? What’ll happen if I do? Maybe it’s worth
it!”

Shona steps into my personal space. “Josh. Stop it.
It’s not funny. You could die if you touch him. Remember what you told me
happened to Keira when you touched her? This may be the same in reverse.”

I can still hear Keira’s scream and smell the burnt
flesh of her hand. I shudder. I hadn’t intended to do that, at least not
consciously. I remember being so filled with anger and thinking she was evil.
She was part of Lucifer and his dominion. “It’s all about belief. What if I
believe it’s bullshit?”

“Well, what I believe is that you came here so I could
talk you out of it. You’re supposed to be following Grace’s wishes, remember?”

“She wants me to save Noah. Maybe smacking some sense
into him will save him.” I say it, but the wind in my sails started to deflate the
moment Shona reminds me about Grace’s wishes. She’s right. I probably did come
here first so she could talk me out of it. Damn it! There has to be something I
can do.

I spin around and howl in frustration. There’s so much
crying and screaming from the newly dead that I doubt anyone even glances my
way.

“What do we know so far?” Shona asks, taking my arm
and leading me farther from the influx of people. “Let’s review.”

“We know Grace belongs in Heaven.”

Shona smiles sadly. “Yes, I agree. We also know that
Noah is the One. And that though we cannot touch him or Grace, someone from
elsewhere may be able to.”

I nod, following her line of thought. “
If
Lucifer lets them. Fat chance.”

“We know that Lucifer became jealous of humanity. That
he believed they didn’t deserve to share Heaven with his kind.”

Shona’s calming presence finally starts to break
through my desperate urge to act. I take a deep breath and try to focus. “We
know that Mr. Griffith could have broken the rules, but was afraid he’d end up
like Lucifer.” That thought continues to piss me off, and I feel justification
from the surprise on Shona’s face. “I wouldn’t have cared what happened to me.
I would’ve done what was right.”

“Your judgment might be clouded by love, Josh.” Shona
grasps my hand. “Are you sure about what’s ‘right’? It seems to me that’s a
very slippery slope.”

The fire ignites in my gut again, and I pull my hand
away. “Are you saying Griffith was right to banish Grace?” I back up several
steps like the thought might be contagious.

“No. Wait, Josh!” she calls as I turn on my heels to
run. “I just meant it isn’t that simple.”

But I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to hear any
of the excuses anymore. It’s time someone did something to fix things instead
of philosophizing while Grace suffers. Enough is enough.

I still don’t know what the solution is, but I know
I’m not going to find it in a book.