Southern Belles, a Novel About Love, Purpose & Second Chances (9781310340970) (10 page)

“So, Hillary thinks I would be a great
candidate for the Tri-Delta. I told her about my mother and she
thinks she’s heard about her. I believe there’s a picture of her
hanging up around here somewhere with her sisters and then one of
her when she was crowned Miss Georgia.” CeCe said giddily.

“Hillary?”

“Or you can call her Pink. She said that’s
what everyone calls her.”

“Oh.” I said, looking interested.

“What about you, Char? Are you
interested—you know in becoming a Tri Delta?

“I don’t know. I think that’s more your
thing Ce. I’d like to join a writer’s guild, maybe.”

“That sounds a bit on the boring side, don’t
cha think Char? We’re at college. You can do whatever you
want.”

“Boring or nerdy? I’m good with nerdy,
besides writing’s cool.” I said, laughing.

“Whatever you call it girlfriend.” CeCe
said, smiling before pulling my arm towards a group of girls where
Pink was standing.

Pink introduced CeCe and I to the sorority
sisters standing there and a discussion quickly ensued about all
the events that they’d put together for this year. They seemed
pretty excited about CeCe—especially after they heard that her
mother was not only Miss Georgia Peach1969 but also a Tri Delta.
Although Bev could easily grate CeCe’s nerves, I could tell that
she was secretly very proud of her mother’s accomplishments. She
was on cloud nine with the girls talking about her and her mother
and the good likelihood of her becoming a Tri Delta. I figured that
CeCe could handle herself if I snuck off for a few minutes. While
she enjoyed her new audience, I slipped away to find a
payphone.

As I walked through the house, I saw guys
and girls intermingling. Everyone seemed to be having a good time.
I was so happy to be here but a part of me felt like it was
missing—at least a part of my heart did. All I could think about
was Skylar, making it hard to be happy in the moment without him
near me. The halls were painted a taupe-gray adorned with large,
antiqued wooden picture frames boasting past Tri Delta sisters.
After searching several hallways I finally came across a quieter
gathering area back by the bedrooms. At the end of the hall I
spotted a small alcove with a phone. Ha! Finally, I could call him
and have a little privacy other than the muffled background music
seeping in from the main living areas.

I took the paper with Skylar’s name back out
of my pocket and felt a tinge of excitement shoot up my heart and a
burst of butterflies took flight. I dialed his number and waited
for the operator to tell me how much money to put in. Sixty-five
cents for three minutes I heard the automated operator say. I
quickly pulled some coins out of my purse and shoved them into the
payphone. I waited for the dial tone and held my breath longing to
hear his voice.

The phone rang once, twice. Suddenly,
somebody picked up the phone on the other end and I felt my voice
go shaky.

“Hi, is Skylar there?” I asked, politely,
trying to cover my excitement and nervousness.

“Hola,
Skylar
no está aquí
.” I heard the voice on the other end
say.

How I wished I knew Spanish. I opted for art
and writing classes, in high school, instead of a foreign language.
I knew she said hi but I thought she said no Skylar here. I grasped
for some sort of understanding. Skylar and his parents were not
Hispanic. What number had I just called? Maybe I dialed the wrong
number. I said thank you and hung up the phone quickly, knowing I
must have misdialed the number. I thumbed around for some more
coins, in my purse, before, carefully, looking at the paper again.
I was starting to panic a bit. The first time I called no one
answered and now some Hispanic woman answered the number I dialed.
I slowly picked the phone back up and dialed each number,
one-by-one, cautious not to punch in the wrong number.

The automated operator came on once more and
asked for another sixty-five cents. I wondered if that was just the
going rate for phone calls from this area. I quickly deposited the
coins into the phone and waited for the dial tone. The phone began
to ring and again I felt the anticipation rise in my chest.

“Hola, beunos noches.” The person on the
other end of the phone said.

Was someone playing a joke on me?

“
Hello, my name is
Char
, I mean
Lucy
. Is Skylar there?” I asked urgently
.

“
Hola, no Skylar aquí.”
Again, the
voice said no Skylar.

“
My name’s Lucy, I
need to get a hold of Skylar. Does Skylar live there? I need to
speak with him.” I said, becoming alarmed now
more
than ever.

“
Lo siento, yo hable no englis.”
The
female voice replied.

Again, I said “thank you”
and
hung up the phone,
crushed. What number had he given me?
I
burst into tears, wondering if
the words he told me were real or just something he said to every
girl he wanted to have sex with. This couldn’t be happening to me.
Was I just too naive? I didn’t—no—I couldn’t think this of him. He
was real and I know he meant what he said to me. He wasn’t like all
the other guys I’d known
.
Why had he given me the wrong number? Did he
accidently transpose a number? He loved God. He loved his family.
He couldn’t have been lying to me. He just didn’t seem like that
kind of person. The tears started to flow harder as I thought of
the possibilities of why he had given me the wrong number, trying
to rectify it in my head. I had given him all of me. Where was he?
Why had he done this? I kept wondering.

“Char, where have you been?” I heard CeCe
behind me, in a giddy voice.

As I turned around, with tears silently
falling, CeCe’s smile quickly left her face.

“Sweetie, what’s wrong?” She said, giving me
a hug.

“I’ve called Skylar three times and I can’t
get a hold of him and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to.” I said
as I tried to hold back more tears from falling.

“How do you know? What happened?

“The first time I called him, no one
answered. Then I called again and a Spanish-speaking woman answered
the phone and I’m pretty sure she said there was no Skylar there. I
dialed the number again because I thought I misdialed it but then
the same woman answered and said there was no Skylar there.” I
began to cry steadily now.

“How could he have done that to me CeCe? I
gave him everything.”

She hugged me and said quietly, “I know
honey”, as she stroked the back of my head.

“Char, maybe something happened. From
everything you’ve told me about him he doesn’t seem like the type
of person to do that.”

“I know, but why would he give me someone
else’s number?”

“Didn’t you give him your phone number too
Char?”

“Yeah, I did, but it’s my number at
home.”

“So, before we both light him on fire let’s
see if he calls your parents.”

“Okay, but he better call. CeCe, I think I
love him and I know it’s totally ridiculous but I’ve never felt
this way about anyone. If he never calls I don’t know what I’ll
do.” I paused. “Oh CeCe, I’m sorry—this was supposed to be our
first night out and I’m ruining it.”

“Charlotte,” CeCe said in a stern motherly
voice, “we have four years to party. One night is not ruining any
of it. Besides, I think I’m in with the Tri Delta’s. I still have
to go through all the rigmarole but honestly I don’t think they
would let this Betty go!”

“CeCe that’s wonderful. Your mother will be
very proud of you.”

She smiled and waited a moment. “Come on
Char. I snuck my mom’s copy of Pretty Woman with me. We have
Mountain Dew, Twizzler’s and Reese cups back at the room. We could
snuggle and watch it?”

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to have to
leave. I know this is important to you.”

“Charlotte Renee Buchanan, you’re coming
with me. CeCe said as she grabbed my arm and stopped abruptly,
cupping her hand up to her ear. “What’s that?” CeCe said, giggling.
“Oh! Richard Gere is calling our name,” she said as she smiled and
looked straight at me, “and we can’t disappoint him.”

How I loved CeCe. She was the best medicine
for some of the hardest times in my life.

Chapter 6: Sick in Love

Weeks
had passed and I hadn’t heard anything from Skylar. I called my mom
several times a day for the first two weeks to see if he had called
but he hadn’t my mother apologized. He had left my life as quickly
as he entered it. CeCe was a good friend about it all. She would
try to get me to go to various Tri Delta gatherings and to the
sports center telling me I’d feel better if I got out. But nothing
made me feel better. I just wanted to be left alone. My mood was
like a roller coaster. One minute I was mad—the next I was crying
and sad and then, came the loneliness. And finally, the reality set
in that I would never see Skylar again and I felt hopeless and
betrayed.

I was tired all the time. I’d lie in bed
until the very last minute and then got dressed to head to class.
Maybe once a day I’d eat if I felt like it; sometimes I just forgot
or slept through meals. I was heartbroken and my body knew it. I
started feeling weak and queasy with any strange smells. When I
managed to get up long enough to brush my teeth, I vomited, gagged
by my toothbrush. Several times I had to run to the toilet with
puke already sitting in my throat. All I wanted to do was
sleep—hoping I would feel better although nothing helped my heart.
I snuggled up to Skylar’s sweater, his scent barely remaining. As
much as I wished I could see him—that things were different—I began
to think it would have been better to never have met him. At least
that way I wouldn’t know the pain and emptiness of a life without
him. The more I thought about him the sadder I felt. I was
paralyzed. And I was afraid if I tried to move on it would mean
that part of my life was over, indefinitely. I didn’t want to hurt
anymore but my heart wasn’t ready to let him go.

“Do I feel warm CeCe?”

With her hand on my forehead she said, “no,
but you look pale. How long have you been sick now?” She asked.

“I don’t know, at least a week maybe. I just
feel so weak sometimes and I can’t stop throwing up.”

CeCe looked at me seriously. “Char, you’ve
been throwing up, tired, and nauseous for the last week.”

“I know.”

“Char, I don’t want to say it, but.”

“But what?” I blurted out. “Just say
it.”

CeCe cautiously waited a moment. “It’s been
five weeks since that night and you started getting sick only about
a week ago. You could be pregnant.”

Speechless, the thought hadn’t crossed my
mind. We were careful. We used protection and it was only once.
There was no way I could be pregnant.

“You said he used a condom that had been in
his wallet for three years. Maybe it broke. Did you see it before
he buried it in the sand?”

“No, I didn’t ask to see it.” I said,
frowning at CeCe in disgust.

“I’m sorry Char. I wasn’t trying to upset
you.” CeCe quickly offered up.

“I’m sorry Ce—I didn’t mean to snap at you.
I just don’t feel good. I’m stressed, I’m mad and being pregnant
right now is not part of my plan…unless there’s a dog, a ring and
Skylar. My parents would kill me.”

“I’m sure you’re not pregnant Char. But if
you want I’ll go with you to get a pregnancy test and then you can
cross that off your list and see the campus clinic for whatever
this is.” CeCe proposed.

“Okay, but I’m wearing sunglasses and your
pink hoodie. I don’t want anyone to recognize me.” I admitted
feeling embarrassed.

“Maybe I’ll wear my fake mustache.” CeCe
said goofing around.

“Cecilia Kathryn, this is serious.” I said
as I threw a pillow at her, barely missing her head.

This was the first time I left the dorm
room, in weeks, other than to go to classes or the cafeteria. As we
crossed the campus to get to the closest drug store I noticed that
some of the trees started to turn a lemony-yellow. I hadn’t really
taken notice of the surroundings since the day we got here. While
we walked arm-in-arm a fresh woody smell, like that of trees after
the rain, lingered in the air. I loved the south. Here and there
other college kids walked past us. I missed being in the outdoors
and realized that my life had come to a halt these last five weeks.
I knew that I had to do something. I couldn’t keep burying myself
in bed all day. It wasn’t what I came here for and I was being a
terrible friend despite my heartbreak. CeCe had been trying to
encourage me all along while I pushed her away so I could wallow in
my sadness.

“It’s this way.” CeCe said discretely as she
ushered us threw the pharmacy door and towards the aisle with
pregnancy tests.

I hadn’t been near this section before. I
never thought I’d suddenly find myself in the aisle with birth
control products like pregnancy and ovulation tests beside it.
Trying to conspicuously look and read the boxes to find the best
and preferably least expensive pregnancy test I scanned the shelf
in front of me. There were so many to choose from. One promised
that it could detect pregnancy earlier than all the other pregnancy
test brands. Most of them said results in five minutes or less.
That would be the longest 5 minutes of my life. Some had plus signs
as if to signify me plus one to show a positive result. Others had
lines, two lines pregnant, one line not. I was counting on one
line. I was too young to be a mother, especially an unmarried
mother.

“I think this one’s your best bet.” CeCe
whispered in my ear.

“It has two tests just in case it’s wrong,
has a plus sign, and you’ll know in three minutes if you’re
pregnant or free.” She said turning towards me with her fake black
mustache suddenly appearing above her upper lip.