Southern Hearts (Southern Love Series) (16 page)

"Only to have those words not be true," he
finished the sentence for her.

"Yeah." Farrah wiped at the tears that fell from
her eyes. "I've had a few months and days to think about our relationship.
Would you believe I have actually done a lot of soul searching and uncovered
family secrets?"

Farrah sat down on the bed and told Austin what she'd
learned from her grandmother. He held her hand tightly as she told him about
her trip to New Orleans.

"You met your biological father, Farrah. You have the
power in your hands if you decide to have a relationship with him. It seems to
me that he tried to be there for you without you even noticing it. I guess he doesn't
want to cause any more pain in your life."

"Yeah, but he told me not to make the same mistakes.
You only find that one true love once; don't squander away the time you have
with that person."

"Let me tell you a story." Austin kneeled in
front of Farrah. "My mother, Charlene McBride, knew you."

"I don't recall ever seeing or meeting a Charlene
McBride," Farrah said as she racked her brain, trying to put names with
faces.

Austin went over to the nightstand and retrieved his
wallet. Opening it, he reached for the picture of his mother sitting on top of
Snowflake. He handed the picture over to Farrah.

Farrah looked up at the older blonde-haired woman
sitting at the table in the back. Her grey eyes seemed to be troubled. Cutting
a slice of fresh pecan pie and pouring fresh coffee into a mug, Farrah walked
over to the table where the woman sat.

"I didn't order anything, sweetheart," the
woman said.

"You have that look on you face, ma'am, and my
momma used to always say that when a woman is down, it's time to indulge in
something sweet," Farrah said with a smile. "Plus, it's on the
house."

"Well, I must say that your mother is one smart
cookie."

"She was." Farrah sat down in front of the
woman. "I'm Farrah, by the way."

"It's a pleasure, Ms. Farrah. Everyone calls me
Ma."

"So, Ma, why the sad face?"

"Well, honey, it's not every day that you get told
you only have six months to live," Ma said sadly.

Farrah's hand instantly found the woman's. "You're
right. Nothing I can say will comfort you, not even this darn piece of
pie."

"I don't have any regrets in my life. I was married
to the man of my dreams for thirty-two years until he died two years ago to
this day. I have this amazing son who any mother would be proud of. I hope and
pray that he will be well when I'm gone," Ma said and smiled.

Farrah cleared her throat and recited her favorite
quote.

"'Somebody should tell us, right at the start of
our lives, that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every
minute of every day. Do it! I say. Whatever you want to do, do it now! There
are only so many tomorrows.'"

"Pope Paul VI."

"Yes," Farrah said excitedly. "After my
momma died, I used that quote as a centerpiece for my life. I can assure you
that your son will be well."

"How do you know?"

"Because you and your husband raised him right. I
can tell." Farrah kissed Ma's cheek before walking away from the table.

Farrah put her hand to her mouth in shock. Ma, a.k.a.
Charlene McBride, had visited her until she was no longer able to, when cancer
overtook her body. Ma used to always tell Farrah that she wanted to introduce
her to her son. Farrah had no idea whatsoever that Charlene was Austin's
mother.

"I had not the slightest clue that she was your
mother. She came into Southern Rose, and we started to talk over pecan pie. She
told me she was dying, but we made each other smile." Farrah looked into
Austin's watery eyes. "Ma said she didn't have any regrets, but she was
worried about her son."

Austin laid his head in Farrah's lap and felt her fingers
running through his hair. He knew his mother didn't want him to witness her
dying; when he'd told her that he was going to take time off from a tour he was
headlining to be with her, she told him no. He always regretted not being fully
there for his momma.

"Charlene didn't want you to see her at her worst. You
know what she told me?" Farrah continued to stroke Austin's head.
"Charlene didn't want to burden you with the sickness. She wanted you to
remember her being healthy and stubborn as an ox."

"Our paths were destined to cross," Austin said.
"Yours and mine."

"Maybe."

Farrah thought of her conversation with Elspeth in New
Orleans
. Child, you and this man have people cheering you guys on from the
sidelines.

"Austin, I'm going to cook us some breakfast and start
the search for an obstetrician."

"Does that mean we will live here in Nashville
together?" Austin could hear his heart racing as he waited for Farrah's
response.

"We'll talk over breakfast."

Farrah kissed Austin's forehead before leaving the room.

***

Farrah was preparing turkey bacon, strawberry pancakes, and
scrambled eggs when Austin walked downstairs wearing a white undershirt and
blue jeans. He looked so fine that she was on the verge of telling him to
forget about breakfast, that she was hungry for something else that wasn't on
the menu.

"You know, I was going to hire a chef," Austin
said as he took a slice of bacon from the platter.

"That would be a cruel joke." Farrah laughed.
"Besides, I like cooking."

"I see." Austin looked over the platter of food
Farrah had prepared. He was only in the shower for twenty minutes, and she had
managed to prepare a breakfast fit for a king. "Here, let me take over. Go
sit. You already did too much this morning."

"Austin—" Farrah started to say, but Austin gave
her a look that said he was in control.

"Fine."

She stuck her tongue out at him and marched over to the
breakfast table in the kitchen. Sunlight streamed directly into the kitchen
through the large window. She could see Snowflake out in the pasture.

"No horse riding." Austin smiled as he put the
last platter on the table.

"I know." She turned her attention to Austin.
"I'd like us to say grace."

"I'll say it, darling." He took Farrah's small
hands in his. "Dear Lord, thank you for this meal that my Farrah prepared
this morning. Thank you for bringing Farrah and me back together. We're so
blessed that we will be proud parents in a few months. All I ask is that our
child is healthy. I can't ask for more. Amen."

"Amen," Farrah echoed as she took a bite of
pancake.

After making small talk at the table, Farrah decided that
she couldn't keep holding off her answer to Austin regarding their living
arrangements. She knew that she wanted to be with him and didn't want to waste
any more time apart from him.

"Do you love me?" Farrah asked.

Austin stopped chewing and looked at Farrah. "I'm
madly in love with you."

"Why do you love me?"

"I fell in love with your character and your natural
beauty. When I first laid eyes on you, I felt something happening to my
insides. I felt like I needed to be around you every waking moment. I love the
fact that you're caring and grounded. Money doesn't sway how much you love
me."

Farrah nodded.

"The day I met you at that wedding," she said,
"I was intrigued by your southern charms. I didn't even know who the hell
you were. All night long, my employees teased me because I didn't know country
superstar Austin McBride. We came to share so much of ourselves with each
other. I tried every day not to like you and not to fall for you. Every day that
we were together, it was like you were breaking every barrier I had put up to
protect myself."

It was time for Austin to turn the tables on Farrah.

"But do you love me?"

"Yes. I love you so much that it hurts, Austin. When
everything between us was out in the open for everyone to judge, and you left
me confused and hurt, I couldn't stop loving you. We have this bond and
connection that I never shared with anyone in my life. Our time apart was a
learning process for the both of us. I learned that I can trust you, and most
importantly, I feel safe with you." Farrah stood up and sat on Austin's
lap. "You asked me if I love you, and I do, so much, Austin. I'm willing
to make this journey with you."

"Good." He kissed her lips softly. Reaching into
his pocket, he started to pull something out when Farrah got up and paced the
kitchen.

"I know you are a musician and a public figure. I know
our relationship has been dissected and scrutinized by the media. I think I've
had my share of the limelight. So I'm proposing that we must never be seen out
in public together."

"What about doctor appointments?" Austin asked.
"Farrah, I will be in every aspect of our child's life including being
there for you and your every need. I don't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks,
and you shouldn't either."

Farrah saw the determination in Austin's eyes.
"Austin, please don't make this difficult. Come on. One of your crazy fans
burned my restaurant down with me in it. I received so many death threats. I
don't want this"— she pointed between herself and Austin—"to be the
victim of another crazy fan. It would just finish me off."

"Okay, hiring two bodyguards is on my to-do list
today."

"Austin, I'm serious. I cannot and will not put our
baby in jeopardy because of what other people think."

"And you think I will?" he yelled.

"No! Please just listen to me." Farrah took a
deep breath. "I would never want you to choose music over me. I love
seeing you perform and your happy fans. I'm just saying that in order for me to
have peace of mind, I propose that we never be seen out in public together.
That's all I ask."

"Fine," Austin said reluctantly. "If I have
to choose between music and the woman I love, remember this, Farrah Rue: I will
always choose you."

He knew there was no way he would win this argument with
Farrah. Really, he didn't blame her at all. She was scared, and being pregnant
would only amplify that.

"I'm going to hire security on the ranch, though. Just
to make you feel at ease."

"Make me feel at ease? Are you sure you don't mean to
make yourself feel at ease?"

Austin nodded. "I want you to be protected whenever
I'm gone away on business."

"Fine."

Farrah continued to eat the rest of her breakfast. She
wasn't crazy about the idea of security or bodyguards following her around, but
she knew Austin was probably still reeling from the whole incident with the
burning of Southern Rose in Dallas.

***

"Wait. One more time. What are you saying?"
Rocky, Austin's road manager, asked again.

"I'm going to take two months off to spend time with
my soon-to-be wife. Farrah is in her first trimester, and I want to be close to
home until the morning sickness subsides."

"Are you freaking kidding me? Do you even know what
you're talking about?"

"Farrah comes first. The tour is over. I'm going to
spend the next couple of months recording my new album at the ranch in
Nashville."

"The record label is not going to like this."
Rocky rapidly typed on his computer.

"I couldn't care less what you or anyone thinks,
honestly, because if people ask me to choose family over music, it would be
family any day of the week."

"The label is so not going to be happy. Especially
after the cheating scandal."

"My touring obligation is over. The album went
platinum. We have two songs at the top of the charts."

"I'll let you know what the label says."

"You do that." Austin tipped his hat before
exiting the conference room.

All Austin wanted was time to show Farrah that he loved her
and wanted her. He knew he'd caused her so much pain, and he needed to make up
for it. Hopefully, during his time off, he could get them back to where they used
to be. He took the ring out of his pocket and kissed it. He was planning on
asking Farrah to marry him— properly this time. He had never been this nervous
in his entire life. He was so afraid she would say no.

Farrah lay on the table. She smiled at Austin as he very
intently studied the pregnancy stages poster on the wall beside them.

"Having a baby should be easy, sugar. I remember
watching a filly being born."

Farrah sat up and looked over at him. "Really,
Austin?"

"What?" He grinned at her.

"Nothing." She laughed. Farrah couldn't wait to
see Austin in the delivery room when the time came.

They had decided to go the midwife route instead of having
a hospital birth. The moment she first stepped into her new home, she knew it
would be the perfect birthplace for the baby.

Delores Betts, an older woman with a southern accent, was
their ideal midwife candidate. She'd been a midwife for forty years, and she
didn't mince words.

"Our goal is to have a healthy baby at home."
Delores smiled as she turned her attention to beginning the ultrasound.

As Austin held Farrah's hand, a sound he would never forget
for the rest of his life filled the room. The only word he could use to
describe the sound of his child's heartbeat was
extraordinary
.

"The baby has a great heartbeat at twelve weeks,"
Delores said. "Our next appointment will be more fun. Do you have any
questions?"

"No," Farrah answered.

"I do." Austin went to his book bag and took out
what appeared to be an iPad. Farrah was surprised as he shot question after
question at Delores.

"How much weight should Farrah gain? What do you
recommend? I was thinking I should hire a dietitian."

"Do I need to lose weight, Austin?" Farrah said
as she looked over at him.

"Um, no, I just want you and the baby to get the right
nutrition," he said and looked at Delores for help.

"Eating a healthy, balanced meal is very important so
the baby can get the proper nutrients. When people say to 'eat for two,' it
doesn't mean to go overboard. You only need to gain about twenty-five pounds
during your whole pregnancy. Healthy mom equals a healthy baby."

"So, one pound a week?" Austin asked as he
continued to type on his iPad.

"That's about right." Delores tried not to smile
at Austin.

"For a few days, I witnessed Farrah having morning
sickness all day long. Is there something that can help her?"

"Try to eat smaller portions. Try ginger ale or ginger
tea. Saltine crackers help. Also, just taking it easy will help."

Farrah couldn't help but smile as Austin fired off question
after question and took notes. Their appointment lasted longer than expected
and ended with Delores telling Austin he could forward any questions to her
email, or she could come by the ranch. He requested Delores to come to their
house for lunch sometime next week.

"Honey, enjoy Austin. He's a first time dad,"
Delores said to Farrah when Austin stepped out of the room.

"So, he is only going to get worse?" Farrah
laughed.

Delores laughed. "Check with Faith at the front desk
for your next appointment."

"Thanks." Farrah smiled.

"Come on, let's get you dressed," Austin said as
he handed Farrah her dress. "What do you want to do? It's past your
lunchtime. Do you want to grab some food?" Austin could see a slight
hesitation in Farrah's eyes.

"Don't worry; I've got a place in mind that doesn't
require us to eat out in the open."

"Okay," she said softly.

***

"Sonic?" Farrah laughed as they pulled up to the
restaurant, where the servers delivered food to you on roller skates.

"I told you that we didn't have to get out." He
leaned over and kissed Farrah as soon as he'd parked.

"Thanks."

Farrah looked over the menu. She was craving a chili cheese
dog with onion rings and a large blue coconut slush. After all the questions
Austin had asked the midwife about her weight, Farrah wondered what he would
think of her order, but he placed it without hesitation.

"Tomorrow, you guys will have a balanced meal,"
he said.

"Austin, I hope you're not going to be this
overbearing for the next seven months."

"Actually, I will." He intertwined his fingers
with hers. "I'm going to cut back on my traveling so I can be with you. I
had a recording studio built at the ranch, so I can always be nearby."

"You don't have to change your lifestyle because of
the baby."

"Farrah, you and the baby are my number one
priority." Farrah nodded her head and looked out the window.

Austin patted his pocket where he kept the ring. He watched
as Farrah continued to stare out the window. He knew exactly what he wanted,
and that was for her to be his wife.

"Remember when we talked about where we wanted to be
five years from now?" Austin asked.

Farrah turned in her seat to look at him. "We both
said we wanted to be happily married with children."

"I don't want you to hate me or feel like you can't
trust me." He took her hand in his. "I knew that you were the one for
me when I looked into your eyes on the first day I met you. When I was a young
man, my daddy used to always tell me about finding a best friend, one who would
love me through thick and thin, a friend who'd be my comfort during the storm.
You're that best friend, Farrah. You are my soul mate."

Austin took the ring from his pocket and tried to control
his trembling.

"Austin." Farrah's eyes widened as she looked at
him.

"No, listen to me." Austin took a deep breath.
"You love my flaws, and I love yours. I don't think I knew exactly what
love was until three months ago. You're the one who moves me like no one else.
I know if I fell down, you would be the one there to catch me. Today, Farrah
Rue, I'm asking you. Will you be my wife? Will you be the song that plays
forever in my heart? If you listen closely, Farrah, I swear to God you can hear
that love song right now."

Farrah exhaled the breath she didn't know she was holding.
"I have been without you too long. I've always run from love, Austin,
because I have been too scared to get hurt. Then, you came in my life, and you
broke every wall I put up. If I said no right now, I would still be running,
and I'm tired, Austin. I'm tired of running. I want to love you forever until
my last breath."

"No more running," Austin said as he slipped the
shiny platinum diamond ring onto her finger.

Farrah looked down at the ring—three shining diamonds
surrounded by sapphires—and she adored it.

"My grandfather gave this ring to my grandmother, who
gave it to my father, Sean McBride. Sean McBride presented this ring to my
mother thirty-seven years ago, after their second date. He said he knew my
mother was the one for him after just a week. He said love has no
timeline." Austin became choked up. "When my momma gave me this ring
on her deathbed, she made me promise to only give it to the woman I love."

"You didn't give it to Rebecca?"

"No, deep down I knew Rebecca wasn't the woman for me.
This ring has only graced the fingers of three women. My grandmother, my
mother, and now you."

Farrah felt honored and blessed to be part of Austin's
family tradition. She could see herself thirty years from now giving her son or
daughter the ring.

"I love you," she said in between kisses.

"Does that mean yes?"

Rebecca laughed. "Yes."

"Good, because we're getting married in two
weeks," Austin said quickly.

"In two weeks?" she shouted. "What's the
rush?"

"I don't want us to waste any more time." He
handed Farrah a chili dog. "We could have a small wedding on the ranch,
with just our families and friends. Don't overthink it all, Farrah. Actually,
you don't have to worry your pretty little head about anything. I'm taking care
of everything."

"Fine, but since we're making plans, I have one of my
own. No sex until after we say 'I do.'"

Farrah laughed when she saw the look of horror on Austin's
face.

"Okay, darling," he said, chuckling. "That's
okay."

***

Farrah had to admit that since moving to Nashville, she had
been
so bored
. At least when she had Southern Rose to run, she was
always busy with making new dishes and working there. Now that her business was
burnt down to the ground, she was at home with nothing to do. She didn't have a
restaurant in Nashville, but she wouldn't let that stop her. She decided that
she would cook for the employees on the ranch.

"What is my baby cooking today?" Austin said as
he came up the stairs from the recording studio downstairs.

"Well, Mr. McBride, I cooked dinner for everyone. I
thought we could eat outside on the patio," Farrah said excitedly as she
moved around the kitchen.

"Farrah, you know the workers have been complaining about
you. They said, 'Mr. McBride, your fiancée is making us fat.'"

"Oh, really!" Farrah laughed.

"Yeah." He laughed and plucked a strawberry from
the fruit salad she'd made.

"Hey!" She popped his hand with a wooden spoon.

"We should open a restaurant here." Austin
watched Farrah's smile fall.

"I don't know," she quickly said as she checked
on the homemade mashed potatoes.

"No pressure, baby." He pulled Farrah into his
arms. "Just think about it, okay?"

"Yes, sir!" She leaned back and kissed him.
"Now, help me set the table."

"Yes, ma'am!" He saluted Farrah as he walked
through the French door that led to the stone patio. "We haven't told
anyone that we're getting married. We could tell them today."

Farrah stood in the doorway holding a peach cobbler. She
wasn't sure if she wanted to tell people yet.

"I don't know," she said. "Are you sure it's
the right time?"

"Don't tell me you're embarrassed of me?" he
teased.

"Okay, we can tell them." Farrah put the cobbler
on the table.

"Great," Austin said as he went back into the
house to grab the remaining dishes.

Lunch consisted of buttermilk fried chicken, homemade
mashed potatoes, and mini corn on the cobs with butter biscuits.

"Damn, girl," Hank said as he sat down at the
table. "If my Natalie could cook like you, I think I would be in heaven
every night."

Farrah laughed when Natalie slapped Hank's shoulder. When
Austin had introduced the pretty, heavyset brunette with friendly blue eyes as
Hank's wife, Farrah instantly thought they were destined to become good
friends.

"I think if I could cook for you like Farrah, I
wouldn't be able to get you to do squat."

Everyone at the table laughed at the banter between the
husband and wife. Farrah noticed the couple wasn't being openly affectionate
towards one another. They seemed rather more like friends than lovers. Farrah
sensed there was something going on between them that she couldn't put her
finger on.

"Have you heard Austin's new tracks for his upcoming
album?" Julius asked.

"Don't even ask her that," one of Austin's
producers chuckled. "Austin serenades her every night."

"Does he?" Natalie asked.

"What? He likes my opinion," Farrah said
innocently.

"Actually, Farrah is my muse. This new album is
dedicated to her and the love we have for one another."

Austin looked at Farrah as he continued to talk. "The
start of our relationship wasn't perfect, but then again, nothing in life is
perfect."

"I'd like to make a toast." Farrah stood up with
her mason jar filled with iced tea. "I'd like to thank everyone at this
table. I didn't have a family, but I've gained both a family and friends since
Austin came into my life."

Austin stood up and held her hand, and she continued.

"So, today, I stand here telling family and friends
that in two weeks, I will be marrying my soul mate and the father of my child.
See, there was this time in my life that I was lonely and sad, but God brought
this amazing guy into my life to love. If you don't have that person in your
life to love, I hope you find them."

Farrah caught Austin's gaze and saw that his eyes shimmered
with unshed tears.

"Cheers!" everyone said as they clinked their
glasses together.

***

Austin walked towards the wooden fence that Hank was
repairing. "What's on your mind?"

"What makes you think I have something on my
mind?" Hank said as he pounded the nail into the wood.

Austin snickered.

"One, you're hitting the shit out of that nail, which
is already in there as good as it's going to get."

Hank shouted as he threw the hammer on the ground.
"Nothing is wrong!"

"Okay, you don't have to bite my fucking head
off." Austin shook his head. "You know what Farrah told me?"

"What did she say?"

"My sugar dumpling thinks something is wrong with your
marriage. I told her that you and Natalie have been together for ages and that
every couple goes through a dry spell."

"You sound like your momma." Hank said as he took
a swig of water.

"Well, what's going on with you and Natalie?"

"You ever felt like you weren't appreciated, like what
you did for someone wasn't good enough?"

"So, you feel like you're not good enough for
her?"

"Man, I don't even know. I'm tired of being sick and
tired." Hank picked up the hammer, threw it back onto the ground, and
walked towards his pickup truck. He turned to face Austin. "The more I sit
here and watch you with Farrah… and now I'm hearing about Shane, too."

"If you are so miserable, why stay with Natalie?"
Austin asked.

"That's all I know. Natalie and I have been through so
much together. She had two miscarriages. I blame myself at the end of the
day."

"So, you are going to stay with someone you don't
love?" Austin shook his head in pity. "I'll be damned. Aren't you the
same man who told me to go after the woman I loved?"