Sovereign Hope (17 page)

“
Nothing. I just didn’t know Aldan would be back up and
running so soon.”

“
Surely that’s a good thing?”

“
Yeah.” The word sounded hollow. “It is.”

I couldn’t
make any sense of Daniel and Agatha’s tense exchange, but sleep was
definitely not in the cards. Agatha disappeared back into her room,
promising to discuss what had happened with me in the morning, and
I went back to my own room. After lying in bed for over three
hours, wound up and tense, I eventually decided enough was enough.
I grabbed a light hoodie and a book as well as the flashlight and
then marched to the kitchen. I retrieved some chips and something
to drink before making my way through the maze of dark corridors.
Countless stubbed toes later, I eventually found my way back to the
steel ladder that led up and into the outside world. The service
hatch was heavy, and lifting it nearly resulted in me losing my
footing and tumbling back into the abyss below. I resorted to
gripping the flashlight between my teeth, using both hands to push
upwards, causing the faintest of creaks before it swung reluctantly
open.

It felt like I
was escaping from prison as I climbed out into the early morning
sunlight. I looked nervously back down into the hatch, expecting to
see Daniel or Agatha racing up the ladder to drag me back to
‘safety.’ After last night, I doubted I was safe anywhere if those
guys could just bust straight into my brain. No. Sleep was now out
of the question. Period.

I found a
tattered green and white striped canvas deck chair propped in
between two rusting old oil barrels and dragged it off into the
scrubby grassland, determined to enjoy a few hours of fresh air and
soak up some vitamin D.

In the light of day there really wasn’t much to see out
there. We truly were all alone. I couldn’t even figure out where
the Charger had disappeared. Reading the book provided some
distraction, and when I tired of that I found myself staring
blankly up at the wispy clouds that skimmed across the sky,
wondering what all the ordinary people were doing. Ordinary had
never seemed so appealing as I sat there, wallowing in all the
terror that
extra
ordinary had delivered into my life.

It wasn’t
worth thinking about. Instead, I decided I wouldn’t think about
anything. I would ignore my father’s malicious intentions and how
my best friend probably thought I’d gone insane or been kidnapped.
And I would ignore the fact that the people trying to keep me safe
were okay with putting me in danger occasionally. It hurt all the
more that I was developing an uncomfortably strong attraction to
the most belligerent guy in the world, a guy who really couldn’t
care less if I got smoked in the cross fire of their never-ending
feud. No. Definitely better not to think of anything at all.

A beautiful,
sun-drenched, peaceful hour after I’d slipped out, the echo of the
metal hatch clanging shut reached me. Bracing for an argument, I
leaned back, closing my eyes so I could enjoy my last few moments
of freedom.

Daniel came
racing out of the silo only to skid to an immediate stop when he
caught sight of me. He pretended to look around for who knows what
and then disappeared back inside. A few moments later he appeared
again, carrying a beaten-up metal pail, and stalked off about
twenty feet from where I sat. He upended it and took a seat.

There was no
point asking him what he thought he was doing. An argument would
only ensue and I was too exhausted to deal with that. Instead, I
did my best to block out his presence and accomplished it quite
successfully. Occasionally, I caught him scuffing his toe in the
burnt orange dirt or picking at the long grasses and twisting them
in his hands as he looked off into the uninterrupted distance,
seemingly unaffected by my choice of pastime.

At first it was a battle against my conflicting wills not to
pay him any attention. But after a while, with the sun massaging my
skin, it was my eyelids I was wrestling with. I didn’t want to
sleep.
He
might
be there, waiting. It was no good, though. It wasn’t long before I
slipped under the deep black fold of nothingness that embraced me,
welcoming me home.

******

Daniel’s hand
rested lightly on my arm. I jerked awake, my pulse racing. No bad
dreams. No apparent danger. I quelled the unsettled energy inside
me and looked up at him, resentful that he seemed intent on ruining
whatever potential sleep I might have for the rest of my life.

“
It’s starting to rain.” His voice was hushed and
calm.

He was right.
The sky overhead was blanketed with pregnant grey rain clouds.
Their first swollen droplets were descending to explode mightily on
the marbled, rusty earth, each producing small bursts of dust as
they made contact.

“
I would have carried you in but there’s no way I could have
gotten you down the ladder without waking you up.” His tone was
practically apologetic.

My heart
hammered at the idea of him carrying me, of being lifted in his
arms again. It didn’t help that he was wearing a black button-down
shirt today instead of his usual t-shirt, and he just looked plain
hot. I kicked against the foolish, unwelcome reaction and set my
jaw.

“
It’s fine.”

He held out
his hand. I ignored it and gathered up my stuff, juggling chair,
book, lemonade, and chips, before he took the chair from me and
folded it, carrying it under his arm. He gave me a tight smile and
gestured grandly in front of him, indicating that I ought to go
first.

Ha!
He thinks I’m gonna try and give
him the slip. Where am I going to run to out here? Jerk.

We made our
way back into the silo, dashing the last few feet as the rain began
to fall with purpose, wetting our skin and hair. By the time we
made it under shelter, his shirt was clinging to his back, and my
own pale grey tank top had turned into a second skin. I paused to
catch my breath as we ducked inside the open entranceway.

Daniel stepped
inside and stood with his back to me as I threw a look over my
shoulder to marvel at the sheeting rain. The downpour sounded like
gunfire. It rattled and hammered on the old steel above us, echoing
around the inside of the silo, vibrating in my chest. The rude
volume of it all made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on
end.

“
Would you hate me less if I apologized?” Daniel was suddenly
behind me. I spun to look at him, surprised by how sincere he
sounded. His eyes downcast at our feet, his shoulders hitching up
and down erratically as he breathed, uneasy and unsure.

I did my best
not to get angry. “Well, it would probably help. But I’m not gonna
forget that you threw me to the wolves for your own purposes.”

A succession
of emotions fleeted across his face. He remained focused on the
dirt between our feet, which made it difficult to tell whether he
was angry or upset. The atmosphere intensified as the rain grew in
force, and yet the silence between us roared louder than anything
else.

“
I wouldn’t expect you to,” he murmured.

Oh, no you don’t
, I thought. There
was no way I was feeling sorry for him. He would undoubtedly be
back to his arrogant self in no time, and then I’d feel stupid for
playing right into his hands. For all that, my stomach still
butterflied when he looked up at me. I bit my lower lip, trying to
ignore the heady, powerful feeling mixing with all my
anger.

“
I never wanted you here,” he whispered.

I flinched. It
was one thing knowing something because it was obvious, and another
thing entirely having someone say it to your face. “Wow. Gee, but
you’ve made me feel so welcome, Daniel. I would never have guessed
you felt that way,” I shot back.

“
That’s not…that’s not what I mean.” A shadow of vulnerability
played across his face as he struggled with his words. “You have no
idea—”

“
You’re right, I don’t! Everyone keeps hiding things from me!
I
know
you’re
still not telling me the whole truth. That’s the same as lying in
my book, okay? I don’t like it, and I wish you people would just
give me some credit. Maybe I might be able to handle whatever else
is going on! You all talk about trust. I’ve given you every single
scrap of trust I own and you’ve given me none in return! I can’t
even come and sit out here without you posting a guard to make sure
I’m not going to run away.”

“
I CAME UP HERE BECAUSE I WAS SCARED,
FARLEY
!” he exploded. He reached out to
grip my shoulders in both his hands. “I’m scared
every day
. I’m scared
about the Quorum and their plans. I’m scared when I think about
Elliot getting his hands on you
—
what would happen to you and
everyone else if that were to happen. I’m scared because I
feel
useless.
I
didn’t want you here. I wanted you to have a normal life. I wanted
you as far away from me as possible.” He trembled, the weight of
his words still bouncing around the hollow shell of the
silo.

I gaped up at
him, feeling the pressure from his hands begin to dig into my
shoulders. “You’re hurting me,” I whispered.

He let me go
and stumbled back. I reacted and stepped forward at the same time,
subconsciously wanting to close the gap between us. Beyond that, I
didn’t know what else to do. Standing there, wishing I could find
something, anything, to say to him as he locked me to the spot with
his piercing gaze, felt insufficient.

“
Daniel—”

“
I’m sorry,” he broke in breathlessly. Before I could say
anything in return, he wheeled and disappeared down the
hatch.

“
Well, thanks for clearing that up!” I cried after him. How
could he say those things and run away without explaining himself?
And why the hell was he so worried about me, anyway?

There was no
way I was following him back down into the darkness. Instead, I sat
down heavily on the pail that he had left behind and listened to
the rain, fuming.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Seventy-Thirty

If this is all in Aldan’s mind, why wouldn’t he make sure the
weather was beautiful all day, every day
?
The chilled wind ruffled my hair and penetrated the gaps between my
clothes as I stomped towards the cottage. Wild hair and another
monsters of rock t-shirt greeted me upon entry. Aldan thrust a
scalding cup of hot chocolate into my hands before I could even
take a breath to say hello.

“
So you came,” he said.

I slumped in
the empty chair closest to the fire blazing in the hearth,
relishing the warmth, and placed the mug down on the table to spare
my fingers from blistering. “I guess so. I was pretty mad about
what happened with my… father.” I said the word slowly, the texture
of it foreign and alien in my mouth.

“
I don’t blame you,” Aldan told me, “It was a mean trick. I
would never have considered it under normal circumstances. But
these days, there
is
no normal. We have to be able to bend ourselves a little
without compromising our morals too much.”

He didn’t
sound too sorry. In fact, he sounded quite happy. I didn’t feel
brave enough to request an apology, though, so I just stared at my
hot chocolate and sulked. The wood continued to snap and crack
heartily in the hearth. I could feel Aldan’s amused eyes on me,
studying my pout.

“
Alright, then. That lad’s been in here with a face about as
gloomy as yours so I daren’t ask what’s happened there, but I hope
in time you’ll forgive the two of us. In all honesty, we had no
idea that Elliot could affect you physically in your dreams. We
would never have let him in if we had. We thought he would wheedle
some information out of you and then hightail it, but turns out
he’s a lot stronger than we thought. I
promise
you this much: he’ll never
get in again. I’ve sealed you right up.”

I had no
choice but to take his word for it. “You think Elliot believed me?”
I asked.

“
There’s no way for you to lie to him. Not in there. He could
make you confess your darkest, nastiest secrets, the ones you’d
never normally tell
anyone
, and there’s not a thing you
could do about it. I just snapped your conversation short before he
could ask something we didn’t want him to know.”

“
Yes, but now he knows we have no idea where the talisman is,
and that we have no plan to stop them. Surely we’d want them to
think the exact opposite?”

“
Well…not really. You don’t understand creatures like this. If
they think we have everything we need to implement a plan against
them, then they’ll come down on us so hard we won’t have time to
tie our shoelaces. If they think we’re stranded in open water with
no life line, we buy ourselves some time, you see?”

It did make
some sense.

“
The thing is we
do
have the talisman,” he continued. “It’s just
broken.”

My head
snapped up. “You have it?” Adrenaline coursed through me, turning
my stomach ice cold. If they had the talisman, did they expect me
to play my part in the prophecy?

“
Without it being fully operational we need time to work out
another plan. We’re almost there, though. Trust me, you wouldn’t
like the original blueprints, anyway.”