Spark (Black Legion MC Book 1) (5 page)

CHAPTER NINE

“Thought I’d find you here.”

Lena blinked as she saw Jax looming above her, his green eyes soft as his mouth stayed fixed in a straight line. His stare seemed soft, and she started to fall into him when she remembered who he had become.

“Just a hunch?” she asked as she pushed away from him.

A light gasp left his lips, and he tried to bring her back into his arms. Something in his hold… no. She knew what it was. Too close to the darkness, and Lena kicked away from him and turned her back.

“What the hell, Lena?” he demanded. “You were never like this.”

Not when she still had a hope of having him, not when he met her at her stoop and carried her books as he peered like a hawk when it came to her day-to-day. Should she have told him when it all went south? Part of her wanted to try her luck now, but her mind spun with the fact that he was right here at the supposed perfect moment. Was is sweet, or had he learned more from Eric than she had ever imagined?

“Are you suddenly keeping tabs on me?”

“Keeping tabs? What are you talking about?”

Lena charged back to his side and started to grab his neck when she suddenly held back and pressed her hands to her sides.

“Maybe you just couldn’t resist to get in another jab,” she spat. “Feeling me out for the others.”

Jax’s eyes blazed as he started to speak, but Lena held her ground as her lip quivered slightly.

“Try to take it back,” she challenged. “

“I didn’t mean it,” he muttered. “I know you.”

Extending his arm, his fingers flexing against the supple line of her wrist, Lena savored the feel of his skin on hers for all of a second before pulling away again. “Don’t be so sure,” she started. “I’m sure as hell not.”

His lips curled into a tight frown, and she watched with baited breath as his hand curled and uncurled into a tight fist. “Don’t say that, Lena,” he whispered. “I said I’m sorry, okay? But please…” As their eyes locked, the anguish plainly masked his face. “I was pissed, okay?” he confessed. “All that time without seeing you. And then we get into it before I even knew why you left.”

Relieved that the secret was still hers, Lena sighed softly and turned away from him. “Thanks for that,” she said. “Glad that you don’t really think that I’m a whore.”

She tried to step away when Jax grabbed her arm. “You know I don’t, Lena. You’re the sweetest thing. Of course you’re not. You never could be.”

“Don’t say that!”

Lena started to meet his mouth, forgetting what he had said and what she had done. But for a second, for what might be the last time that she could stand to stay at his side without a twinge of regret, she kissed him lightly. His lips were soft, and her pulse intensified as took her into his arms. His hold was strong and, as the creek swirled behind them, she wanted nothing more than to get back to the place where his soft touch and his sweet smile was her entire world. Pushing away from him, she saw his eyes full of the hope, and she took his hand. Studying the lines of his palm with a small sigh, Lena’s body started to sigh as he touched her back, and she nearly sank into his touch as she left his hold and kicked close to the edge of the creek.

“You should forget about me, Jax.

“Lena, listen, I---”

“I’m not sweet,” she muttered. “Lots of things you don’t know about me.” Watching her reflection as it peered up at her through the ripples, Lena wanted the image in the water to belong to someone else, someone who might be worthy of him and the feel of his body surrounding hers. If his halting breath so close to her back was to be believed, he might’ve press her to the edge of the water and taken her. She wouldn’t fight; in the end, that did no good. But it wasn’t how she wanted him most, and Jax laid his hand on her shoulder.

“So there’s someone else,” he said.

Lena froze as she turned to meet his eyes, and she trembled under the force of his stare. “Someone else?” she echoed. “So you do think that I’m easy?”

“What? I… no, Lena.”

“I was at school, Jax. Remember that?”

“So who looked out for you?” he spat. “I wasn’t there. You had to have had someone.” His voice stopped as Lena’s heart shook in her chest.

“No one looked out for me,” she muttered. “Had to look out for myself.” But no one on campus scared her as much as a single moment from her past.

“Is that a fact, Lena?”

His words still hurt, but Lena managed to find his eyes. Maybe she could tell the truth about something. “No one’s touched me since I went away.”

Jax’s face stayed like slate until a smile poured across his cheeks, and she froze as he took her into his arms and tried to kiss her again.

“Jax, please don’t.”

“I’ve been waiting for you, too,” he insisted. “Forget everything I said. Just let me show you.”

He kissed her quickly, and Lena’s hands started to move to her thighs. In some ways, it was like every dream she’d ever had coming true. How many times has she pictured their bodies mingling beside the creek as they stroked one another and kept kissing? Starting to sink to her knees, Lena met his eyes when he spoke again.

“Let me be your first.”

Reeling away from him, Lena slapped a tight fist to her palm as she kept her eyes on his prostrate form and twisted her head over her shoulders. “You so sure of that?” she asked.

“Lena,” he started. “You just said that---”

“What if it happened before I left?” she said. “Did you ever stop to think of that?” She had already said too much, and Lena tried to move away when Jax took her into his arms, his breath hard and fast as he peered into her eyes.

“No,” he said. “You would have told me."

“Don’t be so sure.”

“I always have your back, Lena.” His words tugged at her soul, and Lena sighed as she started to move back to his mouth. He would feel so good, taste even better, and she was on the verge of falling into his kiss and trying to tell herself that there was still some chance of everything that invaded her dreams night after night. She was nearly sure when all that what she would have to tell him in time was too much to stand, and she pushed him back with tears in her eyes. “I can’t do this. It hurts too much.”

Jax’s stunned expression singed her soul, and his eyes went wide as he forced a shaky smile and tried to make sense of her change of heart.

“Why would you say that?” he asked, confusion coloring his tone as she pressed her palms to the air and started to back away.

“Just listen to me,” she pleaded. “I’m forgetting. You need to… you---”

Her voice came to a halt as she started to slip against the bank. Her arms flailed wildly, and as the water came close to her eyes, she feared that this was her destined end, to drown in the spot where she had first loved him most and best. Resigned to her fate, Lena continued to slip when Jax’s arms surrounded her and he dragged her back to solid ground.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” he asked.

“Jax, let me---”

“So I was a jerk,” Jax went on. “But you don’t have to be so afraid!”

“It’s not you,” she said. “But I still can’t.”

“Lena, please!”

He tried to bring her back to his chest, and when his lips were nearly at her ear, Lena moaned for all of a second before she pushed him back and clenched her fists.

“You have to let me go,” she said. “Think good thoughts if you can, but---”

“My Lena.”

“But I’m not yours!”

He looked stunned as she slapped his hand away, and she was almost ready to fall back into his arms and calm the tension poking forth through his shoulders when she pressed her hand to her mouth and shook her head. “I need to… I have to go,” she said. “Don’t follow me.”

“Lena, I just---”

“We can’t get it back!”

Breaking into a run, she pumped her legs as she fought to move away from what never could be.

CHAPTER TEN

“There he is! So what’s the good word?”

There were no good words. Nothing but the sight of Lena darting away from him like he carried some dark plague that would infect her to the core if she dared to get too close. In the split second following her unexpected departure, he made the move back to his bike and started after her, watching her hair whipping in the wind as she intensified her speed. As soon as she was back on the main strip and racing her way home, a gnawing in his gut caused him to bring the bike to a halt. Confused as he was, longing to know more, like why and how he could fix whatever had her so spooked? He couldn’t bring himself to keep up the pursuit. If it – he – scared her so much, better to give her some space until he could try another run at her. But would he ever even get that chance?

Artie was already on his second beer as Jax stomped into the Black Legion clubhouse. Day was already turning to night; Jax had spent more hours than he could count moving in circles as he tried to understand. Not another living soul was to be found, and Jax snorted at the sight of the older man perched on his stool.

“Know what they say about drinking alone,” Jax cautioned.

“Then how about you join me?” Artie offered. “We’ll make it a regular old party.”

Jax barely touched his brew as he twirled his finger around the rim of the glass, a heavy sigh escaping his chest as kept his head bowed towards the bar.

“Take a load off, kid. Whatever it is can’t be that bad, right?”

“Think I screwed up,” Jax confessed.

“But I thought you were like the man with the plan or something. Like you’d meet her in your hideout or whatever and just make with the sweet talk.”

That was, indeed, the idea, and just the sight of her slender frame below the trees, her golden hair spilling over her shoulders gave him the supreme sense that the power to turn back time was something somehow suddenly at his disposal. The smell of her skin still wafted into his nose, almost felt as if it were running through his veins when words far worse than goodbye penetrated his brain.

I can’t do this. It hurts too much.

Why should his apology, his admission that they could get back to a sweet place and go further be something she could not bear? He never should have gone back to her uncle’s, never should have put her down, speaking first and asking questions later. No turning back the clock now. And if there were no going forward with her hand in his, maybe it was best for time to stop altogether.

“Buck up, boy,” Artie said as he slapped his hand to Jax’s back and motioned for him to take a drink. “Give her a day or two to cool off. You said she’s sticking around, right?”

“Has no choice now,” Jax mumbled. “Kind of feel like that’s my fault, too.”

“At least it’s not the same as last time,” Artie asked as he started off his stool to fetch another round. “Now if that shit had come out, bet that would have set old Sully straight for good and all.”

Jax was barely listening, still searching for what else he might have done and what he could have gotten right when something in Artie’s throwaway comment perked his ears to total attention, and he turned his head over his shoulder and watched Artie moving towards the pool table with a fresh mug clenched in his fist.

“Want to rack ‘em up?” he offered. “Good game might help take your mind off of---”

“What the hell did you just say?” Jax asked as he sprang to his feet and stared at the other man hard.

“What? What did I say?”

“Not the same as the last time? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

“You know, when…” Artie’s voice trailed off and cut out altogether as his eyes went wide and he shuffled his feet against the cold concrete floor as he fiddled with a pool cue and took another pull from his beer.

“When what?” Jax insisted, his eyes narrowing into a questioning glare.

Artie gave him nothing but a goofy grin and a half-hearted shrug as he tried to turn back to the felt. “Don’t mind me, man,” Artie said. “Probably just getting my names and my faces all mixed up” A sharp cry left his lips as Jax slapped the mug from his hand. A thousand splinters of shiny glass hit the hard floor, and Artie tried to talk again. But as Jax charged toward him, hissing as his chest heaved, Artie raised the pool cue in a defensive pose as Jax watched him try to backpedal. “It’s nothing, kid. Forget I said it.”

“Like hell, Artie,” Jax spat. “If there’s something I don’t know about her and need to fucking know, sure as shit you’re gonna tell me right now.”

“Jax, you don’t want to---”

Wrangling the pool cue from Artie’s hands, Jax brought it down against his thigh and snapped it in two like a hollow reed. Flinging one half to the side, Jax wielded the other piece with the sharper edge like a sword. His free hand curled its way around the back of Artie’s head, he grabbed hold of the man’s chrome dome and forced him to meet his eyes, and he touched the tip of the shattered cue to his neck. “Tell me right now,” Jax threatened. “Or I swear to God, I’ll show you what it feels like to break in two.”

Artie cowered as he frowned. This was wrong. Artie hadn’t done anything. The man had a code. But he also kept every one of the crew’s secrets buried in the back of his brain. Like a lock box, he usually knew when to spill and when to keep the lid slammed shut. Now he slipped. First time for everything. But Jax was not about to let this slip of the tongue pass him by.

“Okay,” Artie said. “How about you let a guy up and grab a cold one first?”

Jax loosened his grip, but he still stood between Artie and the bar, the shattered pool cue never leaving his hands. “Get a drink after,” Jax said. “Explain yourself right now.”

Artie started to object when he simply cracked his knuckles and hung his head. If the bald man couldn’t even bring himself to meet Jax’s eyes, this had to be far worse than anything that he could have ever imagined. “It’s like this,” Artie said. “Sully’s a fiend when it comes to the numbers.”

“Tell me something I don’t know,” Jax countered. “What does this have to do with Lena?”

Artie’s eyes darted around the room. It was as if he suddenly seemed scared that someone might overhear whatever it was that he had to say. But Jax would not relent, and Artie started to fill in the blanks.

“It was like right before she took off.”

When she had changed towards him, when she had grown cold. He had no desire to linger in the mystery. All he wanted was the why.

“Come to think of it, I kind or remember you coming to me about that – had all those questions as to what you might have done wrong. Pretty sure I told you there was no stain on your hands.”

“Stop dancing, Artie,” Jax hissed. “Get to the god damned point.”

Jax threatened him with the pool cue again, and Artie looked like he was beat as he waved his hands before his face and spoke fast. “All right!” he bellowed. “Old Sully was in for more than he could even hope to get his hands on. Even if his luck started to change. Word was that the Boss was going to bust him up so bad so he’d have to like eat through a straw.”

Jax searched his memory for something even close to the confession, but nothing sprang to the front of his mind, and he told Artie as much.

“Like you wouldn’t have challenged him,” Artie continued. “We all knew you were sweet on the blonde – even then.”

“Fine,” Jax said. “But last I saw, old Sully is still walking and playing the fool. So where did he come up with the money?”

“It was Lena,” Artie admitted. “Just like now, the little girl came through for him.”

“But that doesn’t make any sense. How could she have gotten her hands on that kind of money?”

Artie’s face darkened, and Jax’s heart burned in his chest as he spoke softly. “Other kinds of currency, kid. You know how he rolls.”

No. No he wouldn’t have…

A question started to form around his lips when the door crashed open. Jax turned hard at the sound of Eric whistling a flat tune, and as their eyes locked, Jax forgot Artie and turned his rage on his stepfather.
“You bastard! You son of a fucking bitch!”

Eric was too stunned and too slow to speak as his stepson charged towards him and grabbed his collar.

“It was you!” Jax screamed. “Fucking asshole!” Plowing his fist into his gut, Eric doubled over, and Jax took advantage of his weakness to force him towards the pool table. Holding him down there, Jax struck him again and again, barely registering the feel of Artie’s hands as he tried to pry him away.

“Don’t do it, Jax!” Artie said. “I shouldn’t have said anything!”

Jax tried to push him off as Eric kicked his legs out from under him. Falling to the floor, Artie braced Jax’s body before the point of impact, and Eric struggled to his cheek as he wiped away the blood dribbling from his mouth. Spitting a loose tooth at Jax’s feet, Eric looked at the pile of shattered glass with a smirk.

“What’d I miss?” Eric asked. “Must have been something major.”

Artie kept him at bay as Eric stepped back to the bar and pulled out a bottle of whiskey. He took a straight swig and grimaced as he tapped his fingers against the hardwood. “Someone gonna start talking? Or do I need to call the rest of the boys back from the run?”

Whispering for Jax to stay still and cool down, Artie moved to the bar and suddenly spoke fast. “My fault, Boss,” he said. “Sort of let something drop.”

“Something?” Eric asked as he took another sip. “So you ladies gonna keep me in suspense, or maybe I can guess.”

Jax struggled to his feet, seething with each step as he glared into Eric’s eyes. “What the hell did you to Lena?” Jax demanded.

“Oh for Christ’s sake! Can’t you think about anything like that little piece of tail? Why not just find her and get your rocks off. Bet that’d do you a world of good.”

“Like you did?” Jax asked.

Eric’s eyes were cold as he took another drink. “Artie, Artie, Artie,” Eric chided. “Thought you were made of stronger stuff.”

“Slip of the tongue, Boss,” Artie pleaded. “Won’t happen again!”

“Not when I’m through with you!” Eric barreled toward the bald guy and looked ready to smash his face in when Jax intervened. Pushing Artie back, he raised his fists and sneered.

“Pick on someone who can really fight back!” Jax spat.

Eric started to unspool his belt as he laughed. “Maybe it is high time that I put you over my knee, boy. Pound some sense into your head.” He snapped the leather against Artie’s abandoned stool, but Jax kept his glare hard and focused as his mind filled with Lena and what she might have endured.

“You hit her, too?” Jax demanded.

“Hit who?”

“Lena! My Lena! You gonna stand there with a straight face and tell me that you didn’t hurt her?”

Eric smirked and shrugged his shoulders. “Kid, the cunt came looking for me,” Eric said. “Said she’d do whatever it took to keep her own safe. So I just---”

“You just took it to your disgusting level and you demeaned her.”

Jax kept his fists in check as Eric kicked the broken glass under his feet and licked his lips. “You’re just steamed that you didn’t get to ride her first,” he said.

“Don’t even talk about her like that.”

“And what’s the problem now, little man?” Eric smirked. “Girl’s back home, and you can’t even get a taste?”

Everything clicked. Why she left, why she kept pushing him away when he tried to pull back and make it right. “How could you?” Jax muttered. “She was… she
is
pure.”

“Not so pure,” Eric said as he flicked a smoke from his pack and struck a match on the heel of his boot. “Give you a play by play if you want?”