Authors: Cynthia Wright
"How nice to see you, Mrs. Beauvisage." Hot color flooded her cheeks. "Ah—Nicholai, now that you are awake, I will bring up a pot of tea and some muffins. Would you care for eggs?"
He was ravenous, but decided to wait and help Lisette cook a more substantial meal after his mother's departure. Remembering the day they made succotash with bear meat at the CoffeeHouse, Nicholai's mouth curved upward on one side.
"Nicky, are you there?" Antonia nudged him. "Honestly, will you answer Lisette?"
"Oh, sorry! I thought I had—you know how forgetful we invalids can be." He gave her a grin designed to defuse any anger she might still feel from their little wrestling match. "Muffins will be fine for now, thank you."
"All right, then, I'll be—" Lisette averted her eyes from Nicholai's face, then widened them in alarm at the sight of his bare shoulder. Sure his wound looked worse! "Your bandages! I—you—I mean—"
He rushed to her aid. "Don't worry, Nurse Hahn! I forgot to tell you that Dr. Wistar said my wound should—ah—
breathe
from time to time. So, I took off the bandages when I had my bath last night."
"Oh!" Maddeningly, she blushed again. "Well, I would say that enough breathing has been done. I'll put on some fresh bandages after breakfast."
Watching Lisette's graceful form depart, Antonia thought of all she had heard in recent years about the Austrian ice maiden and her aversion to men and romance. She knew that Katya adored the girl, but Lisette had always been so conscientious about her work at the CoffeeHouse that she had never been able to accept any of the Beauvisages' invitations to join them for supper. So serious—and independent! How could Nicky, who had always been innately charming and quick to laugh, be involved for long with a girl like that?
"Maman, you are doing it again!
What
is on your mind?"
"Dr. Wistar told us that you are well enough to return to Philadelphia; in fact, he thinks it would be beneficial for you to complete your recovery in the familiar surroundings of your own home," Antonia replied bluntly. Unsure of how to proceed next, she paused and observed the shadow that darkened her son's face. He shifted restlessly against the pillows and the sun momentarily illuminated a long golden strand caught in the crisp hair covering his chest. Antonia forced her expression not to change, instantly remembering that Nicky had bathed the night before—so Lisette's hair hadn't fallen innocently the last time she changed his dressing! "I have to agree with the doctor, Nicholai," Antonia continued, "You have healed enough to walk around, so obviously the carriage ride to Philadelphia would do you no harm. Your staff can look after you at home and you will be able to take brief walks to visit friends and your family! In fact, we would be delighted to have you take as many meals with us as you like, or even
stay
with us at first, if the idea appeals to you—"
"What has gotten into you?" Nicholai interrupted, obviously annoyed. "I am thirty-two years old and I can make up my own mind about returning to Philadelphia—or any of those other details!"
"Certainly, I am aware of that. You needn't snap at me, Nicky. You know that I have never been an interfering mother, but—"
"I prefer to remain here for the time being," he declared flatly.
After being interrupted twice, Antonia felt herself bristle. Impulsively, she leaned forward and extended a finger to brush the blond hair from Nicholai's chest. It drifted down and settled on the white linen sheet. "The reason why you prefer to stay here is quite clear." One russet eyebrow curved upward sharply. "Frankly, I am ashamed of you, Nicholai. Using Lisette as a plaything, to gratify your desires... how will she feel when this romantic fantasy is ended and she returns to face reality at the CoffeeHouse? I am well aware of the highly principled life Lisette has always adhered to—"
Nicholai wanted to shake his mother. What had come over her? "Maman, I don't like the tone of your voice; reproach does not become you. I can understand that, in view of my long absence, you may have trouble remembering my true age, but this outburst is trying my patience. As for Lisette"—he took a deep breath, locking his emerald eyes with Antonia's—"I am in love with her, Maman. I am planning, today, to ask her to be my wife."
Antonia's mind whirled; she felt as though a sudden blow had knocked the wind out of her. "Well," she managed weakly, "I certainly do owe you an apology. I'm sorry for behaving like a meddlesome, interfering mother. I lost my head... because I love you so, Nicky." She pressed fingertips against the tears that stung her eyelids.
"Come here," Nicholai said thickly, gathering her close and patting her back. "You mustn't weep, Maman—I haven't a handkerchief! As for the rest, just forget it. We all say and do things that confuse those who know us best."
"I am only concerned for your welfare—I want you to be happy, and I have worried more because of the trials you have, suffered." She sat up, squeezing his hand, and reached for the lace-edged handkerchief inside her reticule. "I realize that the home you grew to love over a decade and the work that fascinated you have been swept away by the Revolution. Your future..."
"It will work out. Together, Lisette and I will make a new future."
"Nicky, you must listen to me." Antonia's voice was calm now, and warm with love. "I was wrong to try to tell you what to do, but I hope that you will allow me to inject a note of reason at this point. There is nothing that would please me more than for you to marry a beautiful, intelligent woman like Lisette Hahn and live happily ever after. Truly! There is, however, more to this situation than you know. Lisette's presence here is a result of a scheme carried out by Caro, Katya, Meagan—and myself. I went along with their plan to throw the two of you together, when all my maternal instincts ached to take care of you myself. I am so pleased that your intentions toward her are serious now... and because of that, you must look past this moment at Markwood Villa and examine other aspects of your life—and Lisette's."
"All right, Maman. I am listening."
"Well, I would suggest that you go slower. Marriage would not be an easy adjustment for either of you—particularly when your love has been flourishing in an environment very different from that of your real lives. There are complex problems for you to work out regarding your plans for the future. Lisette already has an occupation that has been her whole life. Do you want her to abandon that if she becomes your wife? If not, what will you do? I know you too well, son, to believe that you would be satisfied spending your days helping your wife run
her
business. And, what if you should one day have the opportunity to return to France? In the fire of new love, it is easy to dismiss such obstacles. After forty-five years of marriage, I know differently. Love is the primary ingredient, but not the only one—by far."
Nicholai sighed and rubbed his jaw. "I hate to admit it... but what you say does make sense."
"Don't look so dispirited, Nicky! The solution is an easy one, and it will ensure a much more secure beginning for your marriage. Go home—and let Lisette return to her CoffeeHouse. Continue loving her... but this time in the context of your real lives. Woo her with the care and respect she deserves. Share everyday things with her and discuss what each of you desires for the future, until you have reached agreement about the sort of life you both want."
Nicholai sighed. The role of courting beau was one he felt both too old and ill suited to perform; also, it seemed that he and Lisette were beyond all that—and not just physically. Then, he wondered what her feelings would be. She had resented his proprietary behavior so strongly that morning... perhaps, if he wooed her more tenderly, she would realize how greatly she was valued. Yet...
"I will have to think about this, Maman. Some of your points seem valid, but I don't even know if it's possible—I mean, it would seem as though we were going backward...."
"Let me make just one
more
point and then I'll be on my way. You know that I have never been one to care much what the neighbors say, but for Lisette's sake, you ought to consider that aspect of this situation. Already, there will no doubt be gossip when you two return to town. If you marry immediately, it will seem to validate the rumors. However, if you court her respectfully for a while before you marry, her reputation will be preserved."
"I don't really believe that Lisette would care. She knows that we have only shared our love—"
"Of course! And, Nicky, you know I feel the same way. After all, your father virtually kidnapped me at sea, and we 'shared our love' more than once before we were married." Antonia smiled impishly. "However, in this case, Lisette is well known and respected in the community. Unfortunately, people can be cruel and she could be hurt as a result. At the CoffeeHouse, she comes in contact with people all day, and, as you know, some men will say anything after a bit of ale...."
"Are you finished, Maman?" Nicholai was wishing she had never come to inflict all this harsh reality upon him. What a beautiful morning it had been until the sound of his mother's voice turned it upside down! "I appreciate all that you have told me—I suppose. I know that you are much wiser than I about these matters, but I still want to think about this."
Out in the hall, Lisette raised her hand, but stopped before it touched the door. She heard Nicholai's troubled tone and wondered what it could mean. All the time she had been downstairs, cleaning up the mess they had left from the bath as well as preparing the tea and muffins, Lisette had agonized over the fiery events of the previous night... and morning. Had it been wrong? Would he think she was loose-moraled in spite of his protestations otherwise?
It frightened her that she could doubt Nicholai and she felt guilty, remembering the warm magic and emotional rapport that had grown between them and reached its zenith last night. If only her distrust of men was not so deeply rooted... if only Nicholai had not tried to use her so insensitively this morning....
Balancing the tray on one hip, Lisette tried to make out what Mrs. Beauvisage and her son were saying. Never in her life had she eavesdropped, but there was a penetrating tone to their unintelligible words that made her wonder if she might be the subject of their conversation.
Footsteps lightly crossed the rug in the direction of the door and Lisette put her hand on the latch. Antonia, having stopped in mid-exit, turned back to speak to her son—and this time she was close enough for Lisette to make out each word.
"Don't forget, Nicky, that your sister will be married in less than a fortnight... and nothing must dim her brightest day." She gave her son a hopeful expression and heard him sigh.
"You
would
save that for the
piece de resistance,"
he muttered. "If I should marry, I'll be stealing thunder from my little sister—not to mention all the other terrible things you have listed."
In the hall, Lisette made a face. Again, Nicholai had spoken in such a low tone that she only caught words intermittently: "you," "if," "sister," "listed." He was probably going to make a list of all that he could do to help with Katya's wedding—which reminded her of her own obligation to provide the food. An inexplicable chill ran down Lisette's back.
"Nicky, dear," Antonia was saying, "I really must be on my way. I feel certain that I will see you back at home before the week's end."
Lisette realized that she would have to open the door first, or be caught eavesdropping. Mrs. Beauvisage's words were stunning, but somehow, after the spell of insecurity she had just suffered in the kitchen, Lisette was not surprised. Nicholai was going home. Of course! Did she expect him to languish forever in the bedroom of the Hampshires' country house?
Summoning all her poise, Lisette pulled the door open and entered, carrying the tray. Antonia was just a few steps away, facing her.
"Oh, Mrs. Beauvisage—I hope you are not leaving so soon! I brought an extra setting of china and cutlery."
"I wish that I could linger, Lisette, but I have taken enough of Nicholai's time—and yours. Why don't you share the tea and muffins with him?" Antonia gave her a captivating smile.
"How kind of you to suggest that!" Lisette beamed in return. "Unfortunately, I must finish packing. I may have neglected to mention this to Nicholai, but I will be returning to Philadelphia today. I know that he must be equally anxious to get back to his own home now that he is well enough to travel." She deposited the tray on the bedside table, avoiding Nicholai's piercing stare as she poured the tea. "I'm afraid that the time has come for me to return to work—though this respite has been wonderful! Katya's wedding is approaching and there are so many plans to be made regarding the food...."
Antonia was speechless for a moment, then managed to reply, "It was very generous to offer your help, Lisette. I know that Katya is extremely grateful"
"It is the least I can do for my dearest friend." She was already backing toward the dressing room door.
"Well—" Antonia said uneasily, "I will see both of you soon in town, I hope."
Lisette smiled vacantly and disappeared into the dressing room.
Nicholai looked stunned, angry, and hurt. "Would you mind, Maman, waiting downstairs while I dress? I am coming with you. Suddenly, I am very anxious to get out of this place."
Part IV