Stanton Unconditional (7 page)

Adrian walks through the door, smiling. “Hey, I bought you coffee.”

My eyes flick up to him. “Do you have your laptop with you?”

He frowns. “Yes, in the car. Why?”

I drop my head in shame. “I need it to find Natasha.”

“What do you mean?” He puts the coffee down so hastily it spills. “Where is she?”

“Amelie told her that I slept with her and Tash has freaked and taken off.”

“You slept with Amelie!?” He gasps.

I drop my head. “Sort of.”

“What the hell does that mean? You can’t sort of sleep with someone you idiot!”

I nod as I type. “It just happened and then I realised what I was doing and I stopped it midway.”

“You are the biggest fuckwit I know. Why in the hell would you give that stupid bitch ammunition against you?” He sighs as he runs his hands through his hair in frustration.

I keep typing.

“She won’t come back. You’ve done it this time. She will never forgive you.” He shakes his head in disgust.

“Shut the fuck up and get your computer!” I yell as my heart starts to speed with panic.

He runs out of the room. Cameron comes through the door and throws me a piece of paper. “This is the hospital security system. I brought my laptop for you.” He throws it onto the bed.

“Thanks. Cameron, what if those people have her? What if she is danger?” I stammer nervously.

Cameron puts his hand on my back. “I thought you were going to tell her. She would have understood if you just had told her.”

My lip quivers in regret. “How do you tell someone you love that you had sex with someone else? I tried. A couple of times I tried, but the words wouldn’t come out of my mouth.”

“They came out of Amelie’s mouth easily enough though,” he says, void of emotion.

“I thought…” I sit back and put my head into my hands. “This is all my fault.”

“You are an …” he shakes his head, “imbecile.”

Max walks back into the room. “I’m going to go outside on the street and ask a few questions. See if anybody saw anything.”

“I don’t think she would have left the hospital. She has no money on her. I am tracking her now. I will hack the security system to check the exits and see if she left. This hospital is so huge. How in the hell are we going to find her?” I say, defeated.

Max walks over and puts his hand on my shoulder. “She will be ok. She’s tougher than you think. When she calms down she will hopefully come back.”

My eyes meet his. “She doesn’t deserve this Max. I’ve totally messed up. It just happened. I didn’t mean to hurt her. I thought we were broken up. She left me.”

He gives me a sympathetic smile and nods. “I know. Shit happens.” With that he leaves the room.

Adrian runs into the room and starts to set up his computer on the table.

I quickly start to hack the hospital security on his computer as I track her phone on mine. My heart is in my throat … Where are you Tash?

Ben comes rushing in as I crack the security code and he starts to watch the replays of the last twenty minutes on all doors of the hospital. I send the immediate visual to Adrian’s laptop. Once again I try to text Natasha:

Natasha please.
We need to talk.
It’s not how it looks.
I love you.

Why isn’t she returning my call? What if she is in danger? She is so trusting. She would go with anyone to try and get away from me without any money. I should have told her about the attack. I should have told her about Amelie. Regret slices through me … she deserves better. Amelie. What a bitch, she has turned this totally around to make Natasha think that I am in love with her. It looks as though I have been sleeping with Amelie all along. I close my eyes and put my hand over my mouth as I wait for the track to kick in. My god, please be ok, please come back to me.

Ben gasps from the other side of the room.

“What is it?” I ask.

“We have a bigger problem,” he says.

I frown. “Not possible. Natasha running off takes the cake.”

Cameron walks over to Ben and watches his screen. “Hell! Joshua get over here.”

I walk over to see what they are looking at and watch the footage that Ben is replaying. Two men walking into the hospital. One with short dark hair and an arm cast, the other a man with red dreadlocks and two black eyes entering the hospital. Horror dawns.

“How long ago was this?” I rub my hands through my hair.

Ben pushes some buttons and the tape rewinds. “Thirty minutes.”

“What! Holy shit. They have her. That’s them, two of the dudes from Friday night.”

“Calm down, you don’t know that. This could be coincidental,” Ben asserts.

Adrian runs back into the room. “Any sign?”

“It is not fucking coincidental. Call the police, Adrian,” I yell frantically

“Huh, what’s going on?”

“The guys that attacked Joshua on Friday night are in the hospital. We just saw them on the CCTV footage. Call the police,” Cameron stammers.

Adrian’s mouth drops open. “They are here now to … hurt you … Like in this hospital? Do these kinds of people do this kind of thing in a public place?” he stammers, wide-eyed.

Ben shrugs as he continues to watch the screens.

Adrian dials the police. “Hello, I would like to speak to Detective Johnston please. Hurry it’s urgent.”

“Josh, I have her,” Ben snaps.

We all run back to his screen and he hits replay. It’s a fire escape, the door bursts open and she runs out. She’s crying … actually she’s hysterical, gasping for air. She looks around frantically and runs for the road. Our eyes are all locked onto the horror opening before us. My heart sinks again. Look at her. She’s openly devastated … what have I done? She runs in front of a cab and it stops and she dives into the back seat. It slowly drives away. My head drops in shame as my heart rips in two. The only woman in the world I love is the only woman in the world that I hurt. What in the hell is wrong with me?

My computer beeps and I rush back to it. It’s an aerial shot and a red cross shows where her phone is. I quickly scribble down the address. “She’s at McDonald’s just two blocks away. Hurry.” Ben, Cameron and I run for the door.

“What will I do?” Adrian asks while still waiting on the phone.

“Wait here for the police. Keep the door locked.”

“What if the hit guys come and get me!” he shrieks.

I shake my head in disgust. “It’s hit men, not hit guys. Wimp. Keep the door locked.”

“This isn’t funny, Stanton,” he yells as I run down the hall.

I sit in the back of the bus shelter, curled in a ball in the corner chair, my legs tucked under my body. I know if Max has betrayed me and Joshua turns up, I will have no choice but to go with him. But what choice do I have? I don’t know who to trust anymore. At this point in my life if I can’t trust Max, I really have no one on my side. I feel like a vulnerable child, so lost and homesick. The tears run freely down my face as the reality hits home. My worst fear has become my reality. I know he loves her, I felt it in the barn that day. She said that he was with me out of obligation. Is that true? My mind goes back to when we started hooking up.
I can’t be monogamous, so I guess it’s not fair.
Why did I think he was different to other men? Why did I think I could turn the ultimate player into husband material? My mind goes over our relationship so far. I have always been the pursuer—it has always been me. I am an idiot—how did I not see this coming? I even had to bribe him with sex to be monogamous while he was in Sydney and that didn’t even work. My memory brings forth the prostitute that Abbie calls TC which is short for tunnel cunt. I sob out loud as I realise he didn’t even tell me he loved me until I told him I hadn’t slept with anyone else. Amelie is right; he is with me out of obligation and even if he’s not I am definitely not strong enough to deal with this at the moment. I need time to think. Was he really with me out of guilt? He thinks he wants me … but deep down is he really in love with her? Do they share a bond that I can’t compete with? They have common interests, and they are close friends, companions. He and I share amazing sexual chemistry, but we fight like cat and dog. I hate horses, know nothing about computers and if I am honest with myself want to stay living in Australia. We were never going to work. I just wish I had never killed my father in pursuit of the ultimate happiness. Joshua’s unobtainable love. I just need to get home and forget I ever met this destructive man. They say everything in life has a reason. What in the world could be the reason for the amount of hurt I have endured in the last two months? What have I done that is just so bad that it deserves this kind of punishment?

Max walks through the double doors and I half expect to see Joshua behind him, but he’s not. Max has stayed true to his word. I sit still as he walks over to me.

“Come on crybaby. Up,” he whispers.

I smile as I shakily take the hand he is holding out for me. He pulls me into an embrace and I burst into full-blown sobs. I hate it when people are nice to you when you are on the edge—it makes you fall apart. I stand for a minute in his arms crying hysterically.

“Tash, let’s go back. Try and work this out with him. He loves you. He’s frantic,” he whispers into my hair.

I shake my head. “He has been sleeping with Amelie,” I sob.

“Honey, you left him. Remember. I don’t think he was sleeping with her all the time. I think it was just one time from what I heard.”

“What did you hear?” I sob.

“He was screaming at her and telling her that he loved you and that he was going to kill her if she didn’t get away from him.”

I start to really sob. “What was she doing?”

“She was crying, and then she went outside and Cameron and she had a big fight. When I was leaving Adrian had asked the bodyguards to escort her from the building.”

I cry again, out of pity for her. I put my head into my hands and slump back into the chair. Maybe he does love her and she knows it and yet he is denying them a future together out of obligation to me. This is my worst fucking nightmare. He’s sacrificing his own happiness to give me mine.

“Get me back to Australia, Max, I need to get out of here. This isn’t my happy ever after I dreamt about.”

“But Tash.”

“No … are you going to help me or not, because if not you can fuck off right now too!”

He smirks. “Really, fuck off.”

I smirk back. “Basically.”

“So you want me to basically fuck off.”

I smile through my tears as I nod.

“I will go and buy us some bus tickets to another state and then we will get a plane back to Australia. But I want you to ring Joshua and tell him you are safe first.”

My eyes widen with horror. “I am not ringing him Max; he will just talk me around. I have no resistance against him. Please, you text him and tell him you are coming with me and that I’m safe.”

He rubs his face in frustration. “Tash, you are asking too much of me. I will lose my job.”

“Please Max, I’m begging. I need your help. I have no other options.”

His eyes hold mine as he thinks. “Let me buy the tickets and then we will go for a walk and text him before we dump the sim.”

An hour later we have caught a cab to the other side of town and Max takes out his phone. He blows out a heavy breath as he types the text.

I have found her.
She’s safe.

He rubs his forehead in frustration and a text bounces immediately back.

Thank god.
Where are you?
I will come and get you.

“Natasha, honestly. Can’t you just talk to him? He will never forgive me if I do this. Joshua has been very good to me,” he urges.

“Please Max, he’s confused and is only with me out of obligation. He just wants me to be safe and in time this is what is best for him. He will eventually understand.” My lip quivers with unshed tears again.

I’m sorry.
She won’t come back.
I am taking her home to Australia.
I will call you when we land.
Once again, I’m really sorry.

With that he pulls his phone apart, takes the sim out and throws it into the bin. He looks at me solemnly. “Our bus to San Diego comes in two hours. From there we will get a plane to Honalulu and then fly direct to Sydney. I hope you know what you are doing Natasha. Are you sure you won’t regret this decision?”

My eyes fill with tears as pain lances my heart. “Every day,” I whisper.

Chapter 7

“
T
ash, put your
seat up.” I force my bleary eyes open. “We are in Sydney, honey.”

I nod gratefully, unable to speak. Only five days ago I boarded a flight to LA filled with such hope, such joy in my heart. Now I am returning empty and tired. I am emotionally exhausted. I have nothing left.

An hour later I stare out the window in silence as Max manoevres his Audi through the city. We are both lost in thought. What am I going to tell work? Where do I start? I fell in love with my cousin who turned out not to be my cousin, murdered my beloved father and left my so-called boyfriend. He then took a drug overdose because he may be a cocaine addict and he nearly died so I went to him and then found out he is sleeping with the other woman he’s in love with. This is like the world’s worst James Bond film … on steroids. I frown as I summarise the events so far. I am so being punked—where are the fucking TV cameras? They are going to think I am the world’s biggest loser … and guess what? They’re right, I am. We park out the front of my building and Max parks the car.

“I’m going to text him now.” He pulls out a phone we have just stopped and purchased. I swallow and nod as he starts to type.

We are out the front of Natasha’s house now.
She’s home safe.

He pushes send and blows out a breath. We both sit still, waiting for a response. It beeps a message.

You’re fired.
Another guard will take over in three days.
I am giving you one month’s notice.

Max closes his eyes in regret and my eyes fill with tears as the lump in my throat burns. “I’m sorry Max. I had to get home. I couldn’t stay there with him,” I sob.

He nods but doesn’t speak. He gets out of the car and retrieves our things and we head upstairs. As we get to the front door we hear a noise inside and Max pushes me behind him. He holds his finger to his mouth signifying silence.

I roll my eyes. “You should take up acting you know, you really are good with the dramatics,” I mutter under my breath.

He bursts open the door like in an episode of
NCIS
. Mum, Bridget and Abbie are all lying on the lounge and scream in fright.

Mum falls off the lounge in fear. “Shit!” she screams.

I laugh out loud. Honestly what has my life come to … this is just totally fucked up.

“What the hell!” Abbie yells. “Are you trying to frighten us to frigging death Max?”

He relaxes. “Sorry.” He gives a stifled smile.

“How did you guys know I was coming home?” I mutter flatly.

“Joshua rang me,” Mum says as she pulls me into an embrace.

I pull back to look at her face. “Joshua rang you. Did he tell you what happened?”

She smiles sympathetically. “Yes love, he did. Can you ring him? He’s distraught, Natasha.”

I screw up my face. “Did he tell you he slept with Amelie?”

She nods again. “Yes.”

My eyes flick to Bridget and Abbie.

“Natasha, you left him. He thought you weren’t coming back,” Bridget sighs.

“What! You’re on his side? You’re taking his side.” I frown as I pull out of her embrace. I need support, not a fucking lecture.

“No love, there are no sides. But I know Joshua has had just as hard a time as you and I understand. We all understand. He’s suffering too, Natasha,” Mum says as she rubs my arm.

I stand still in shock as my eyes hold hers. I can hear my heartbeat in my ears as my anger hits a crescendo.

“Get out! All three of you. Get the fuck out! You may condone my boyfriend playing up on me, but I don’t. And I never will.” I storm to the bathroom and lock the door.

I run the water as hot as I can stand it, get in and sink to the bottom of the shower as silent acid tears roll down my face and the distinct taste of betrayal burns my stomach and lines my mouth.

An hour and a half later I leave the steamy bathroom to find the girls all lying on my lounge watching
True Blood
. The girls are filling Mum in on the storyline, which she doesn’t seem to be getting. Hmm. I walk past them in silence and into my kitchen to make a cup of tea. Shit, I don’t have any bloody milk. I open the fridge to find it stocked with groceries.

“Who went shopping?” I yell from the kitchen.

“I did,” yells Abbie.

“Thanks,” I reply flatly.

“Does that get me out of the bad books?” she yells again.

I narrow my eyes. “Just,” I snap.

“Does anyone want coffee?” I ask.

“Yes I will. Milky Milo actually,” calls Bridget.

“Can I have one of those Latte Sachet thingys?” Abbie yells.

“I want a chai latte or do you have any lemon tea?”

I roll my eyes. “Fuck off, this isn’t a cafe. I’m serving coffee, plain fucking coffee! If you don’t like it leave.”

I hear them all giggle.
Bitches.

Ten minutes later I walk into the lounge room with a tray of coffees, they all take them in silence and smile.

The thing is, I know that they know that I’m a donkey on the edge. But what they don’t know is that I am so on the edge, I don’t even care anymore. Anyone who messes with me tonight is going down.

“Where’s Max?” I ask.

“We gave him the night off to go and see his girlfriend. We are going to stay with you for a couple of days.”

I roll my eyes. “Can you keep your Joshua-sleazebag-loving mouths shut?”

They all stifle a smile and nod.

“Good, then fast forward it to the Alcide bits. Only Jo Manganiello can get me out of this funk. And nobody talk, I’m not in the mood to listen to your shit.”

The three of them exchange small smiles and lie back in comfortable silence.

I wake to the sound of the jug boiling and Mum talking to Max, toaster popping, and Bridget and Abbie talking about some boring subject on a way too high decibel. I blow out a breath. How is it that the rest of the world is just carrying on as normal when my world is literally crashing around my feet? I feel different today … I’m angry. So angry, at myself mostly. I am a psychologist and I ignored every warning sign. Went against everything I preach in order to hold a man that was never actually mine to hold. I was totally delusional. Joshua Stanton is not my happy ending, he is not my soulmate as I once previously thought. What a load of shit that term is … soulmate. I don’t even believe in that word anymore. He has bought me nothing but heartbreak and you know what? It’s time to grow up and get on with it. I need to pick myself up and dust myself off. My heart is safe as long as I am away from him … so that’s how I am going to keep it. I’m done. I get up and walk out into the lounge room.

“Hi love, how are you today?” asks Mum

I smile. “Better. Max, you don’t need to guard me anymore. Joshua and I are finished so I am not in danger of being stabbed or something equally ridiculous. I’m going to the gym. Go back to your girlfriend’s house,” I announce confidently.

He narrows his eyes at me. “Natasha, I am not leaving you unaccompanied until I get the go ahead, so you can forget the spoilt brat routine. I’m not copping it,” he snaps.

Abbie bites her lip to stifle a smile. “You should use that as a pick up line Max. It sounded totally hot.”

He shakes his head in frustration. “I agree actually Abbs.” Mum laughs.

“God … you girls are ridiculous,” he sighs.

Two hours later we have been to the gym. Max worked out with me so that was … different. I want to call into work to pick up my laptop. I have some patient notes to go over before the court case I am going to next week.

We walk through reception and I smile at our secretary. “Hi Belinda, I just need to get my laptop from my office.”

“Oh, you’re back already. I thought you were away till Sunday.” She raises her eyebrows in question.

I fake a smile. “No, got back last night.” I grab my laptop and am walking out of the office with Max when Nicholas Anastas walks out of Henry’s office. I stop dead in my tracks. Lordy lord he is one delicious man, once again I am stunned to silence.

His eyes light up when he sees me. “Hello … Natasha isn’t it?” I hunch my shoulders like a juvenile delinquent. Holy shit, he remembered my name.

“I was hoping to see you today.” He smiles

“You were?” I smile as my brain turns to mush.

“Yes, can I have a private word?”

My eyes widen. “Of course, come into my office.” Max frowns at me. “It’s ok Max, I know this man.”

Nicholas frowns at our exchange. “Why are you so heavily guarded?” he asks as we walk into my office.

I shake my head in embarrassment. “My boyfriend … ex-boyfriend is a little on the protective side.”

He nods. “Was that your boyfriend I met at the restaurant that day? Joshua Stanton.”

I nod glumly. “Yes that’s him.”
Fucking scuzbuckett
.

“Oh right. So you had another man with you, Adrian Murphy.”

I smile, oh my god I know where this is going.”

“Yes.” I can’t hold the smile that is splitting my cheeks.

He looks around in embarrassment. “I am going to America for a couple of weeks and I wondered if I could get his number off you. I thought we might hook up.”

I give him a resigned smile as I frown. How do I put this? “Umm, Adrian … isn’t really the kind of guy that hooks up.”

He frowns. “Sorry, that came out wrong, I meant catch up.” He raises his eyebrow as he contemplates asking me a question. “Not that kind of guy, hey?” he adds with a trace of a smile on his lips.

I smile broadly as I picture the beautiful Adrian. “Adrian is a romantic, he believes in love. Trust me, he doesn’t hook up with random people.”

I can almost see his brain ticking as he licks his scrumptious lips. His eyes hold mine with renewed determination. “So … can I have his number then?”

Hmm ok, I’m going to make Adrian a little hard to get. Right, what would Abbie do in this situation?

“Look I don’t know, he doesn’t like me giving his number to anyone. I get asked for it a lot.” I inwardly cringe, oh boy was that too cheesy?

He nods and passes me his phone. “Call him. See what he says.” I smile as I look at his hand outstretched with his phone in it. Determination in a man is so damn hot.

“No, I am not calling him on your phone because then you will have his number in the call register.” I smirk.

He smiles as his ploy to trick me is uncovered. “Touché,” he whispers as he raises an eyebrow. He passes me his business card. “Call him tonight and then call me back and tell me what he said.”

Hmm … so dominant. So bloody sexy. “Why don’t I just tell him to call you?”

“I’m pretty sure we both know if we leave it up to him I won’t be getting a call anytime soon.” He smirks.

I scrunch up my face in uncomfortableness. “I wouldn’t take it personally. He doesn’t call anybody back.” God … I should shut up now, I’m blowing it.

He nods. “Yeah I get it. I will speak to you tonight.” He smiles and leaves my office.

I blow out a breath that I didn’t even realise I was holding. If Adrian doesn’t go out with him, he’s crazy. That man is frigging hot. I regain my composure and leave my office. “Ready to go?” I smile at Max.

He nods and we leave the building. Suddenly cameras start flashing and two men start to scream. “Natasha Stanton, is your husband going to make a full recovery?” Huh?

“Is your husband still a sex addict, Mrs Stanton?”

What the hell? My horrified eyes meet Max’s.

“Is he still currently in rehab, Mrs Stanton?”

Max steps in front of me and holds out his arm to shield me, obviously much more accustomed to this than me. We make a run for my car with them chasing us. This is ridiculous, is this really what the world has come to? How could anyone be interested in this trivial nonsense?

“Is your husband a sex addict and a cocaine addict, Mrs Stanton?”

I get into the passenger seat of Max’s car and he speeds away. He looks into the rear-view mirror to check we are not being followed.

“Shit, that was intense,” I whisper to Max wide-eyed.

He nods. “I was wondering how long it would take for them to find you. Just make sure you don’t give them a reaction when they ask you any questions. It just amps the assholes up.”

“I would really like to answer their questions with yes he is a sex addict, possibly a cocaine addict and a total adulterer prick and I’m not his fucking wife, asshole. Not even close,” I snap as I throw my handbag into the backseat.

He smirks at me. “Tough.” He smiles.

I rearrange my cardigan and fold my arms as my anger rises again. I can’t believe I am now being followed, by his paparazzi. For his mistakes. This has got to take the cake.

“I am going to ring Joshua and tell him you need extra protection for a while.” Max mutters while watching the road, and the wipers come on automatically as it starts to sprinkle rain.

My heart sinks. I wish I could ring Joshua. I would dearly love to hear his velvety deep voice. I miss him … already. My sad eyes stare out the window—this is so unfair. He has made this painful bed for me and now unfortunately I have to lie in it … alone.

“You can tell him that you are the only bodyguard I will have, or he can forget it.”

Max’s eyes flick to me. “I’m not telling him that—you should ring him if you have something to say.”

I fake a smile. “Nice try Max, I am not ringing him. I am not texting him and I am definitely not thinking about him. If you don’t tell him that then I won’t have a bodyguard at all. I don’t care, it’s up to you.”

“Natasha, you have cost me my job already. Do not start pulling your two-year-old tantrums now, because I won’t stand for it,” he snaps.

I narrow my eyes as my temperature rises. Now even Max is pissing me off. Actually is there anything in the world that doesn’t piss me off? I nearly punched the screen on the treadmill today when it wouldn’t give me my calories burned. I have some serious anger issues going on. It will be better when I get back to work next week—I just need to keep busy.