Star Girl (2 page)

          They take me to see the zoo, and to see a movie in a theater, something I have rarely done, as most the time daddy just rents video disks. It is so much more fun with the popcorn, and soda pop, as Grandpa Joe calls any soft drink; than just being at home. I love watching movies with daddy and Melissa, but it’s just better somehow at the theater. Maybe it is that Grandma and Grandpa Kilmer know how to have such fun.

          Too soon we are driving back to Omaha, and mommy wants to tell me how she will miss me. I don’t believe her, she’s not a very good liar. She wants to go away, so I say go.

          Carly and I are very sad near the end of our fifth grade year. Next year we will both be attending different schools, and won’t get to see each other every day, though we do know where each other live, so it is not the end of our friendship by any means. I have come to realize that I would really like to kiss her, to French kiss her, and feel her up. She’s so pretty, and cute with her sandy blonde hair and big green eyes. Other girls don’t make me feel like that, and guys certainly don’t, yuck! Just Carly, she’s the girl for me.

          The only problem is, how do I tell her this, without risking our friendship? I know she likes boys, because she has told me who she has a crush on; Billy Hill, a smart mouthed little brat in our class, gross! That’s why I can’t tell her how I feel. I don’t know what to do, and it bothers me big time.

          Of course dad see’s that something’s bothering me. “Steph, what’s going on? Come on, talk to me.”

“Oh god dad, I can’t tell you. You wouldn’t understand.”

“Then let me be confused with you baby. That’s what families do.” He smiles.

“You promise to not be judgmental.” I demand.

“Okay, I promise.” He crosses his heart with his finger.

“I have a crush on someone, but I can’t tell them I do.”

“Oh. Well why can’t you tell them?”

“It would ruin a friendship.”

“I see. That is sticky problem baby. Hmm, are you sure it would ruin the friendship?”

“Probably.”

“Well then, if the friendship is more important to you, probably as it should be, then you’ll just have to suffer the crush, of the crush.”

          Just then Melissa comes home from her work, she’s been living with us for a couple years now.

“Hello my loves. Oh… you so make it worth it. Just seeing you two.” She smiles warmly.

“Make it worth what?”

“All that crap I just put up with.” She sighs.

Dad gives her a big hug and a wet kiss. “You don’t have to work baby, now that I’m a full bird Colonel we can afford it if you didn’t, you know that.”

“I know sweetie, but that wouldn’t be fair to either of you. Besides, I’m saving up for something.”

“Oh? What?”

“You’ll see.” She giggles. “So what’s going on with you two?”

“Oh I was just talking to Steph about her first crush, that’s all.” He shrugs.

Melissa’s eyes light up. “Oh Steph, yeah! Way to go girl, so who’s the lucky guy?”

I can’t say a word, they won’t understand.

“What, the cat got your tongue girl? Oh, I see. It’s a secret crush.”

I nod.

“So, what are you going to do about it?” She smiles real big leaning her elbows on the counter, and she gives me a playful wink.

I just shake my head, and the tears come running.

“Oh, oh. Stephanie baby. I’m sorry.” She is suddenly worried.

Dad rubs her back. “It’s okay baby, she can’t do anything about it, or she’ll ruin a friendship.”

“Oh god. I’m so sorry Steph.” Melissa comes and sits next to me at the table, hugging me with tears of her own falling.

“It’s okay Mel, I just don’t know what to do, that’s all.”

“There’ll be other guys baby, trust me.”

“It’s not a guy.” I let squeak from my lips.

Suddenly it is very quiet.

          Melissa pulls back, still holding my shoulders, and looks me in the eye. Then she hugs me again, even more tightly.

“That’s fine baby. It makes things more difficult for you, but it is how it is.”

“You ain’t kidding Mel.” I shake my head.

Dad lets a deep sigh, and he smiles at me, nodding with acceptance. God I love them both. That was way easier than I thought it would be.

“So this girl doesn’t know that you have a crush on her, and is it your friendship with her that you’re worried about?” Mel rubs my back.

I nod, crying. “It’s Carly!”

“Hmm, that does present a bit of a problem. I am pretty sure Carly likes boys Steph, but you already know that.”

“She has a crush on Hill Billy.”

“Hill Billy?”

“Billy Hill, but that’s what I call him.” I sob.

Melissa turns to dad. “Baby, why don’t you let Steph and I talk for bit, would you?”

He nods with big eyes, and just about runs from the room, I can tell he doesn’t have a clue how to help me.

“Steph, let me tell you about something that happened to me when I was in Junior High. I had a very good friend named Jenna, we are actually still friends to this day. We call each other on our birthdays, but we live so far apart that’s about all we can do. Anyhow, when I was twelve I had a crush on a boy, and didn’t know what to do about it. Jenna helped me out, telling me I should just confront the boy, telling him that we needed to talk, and take him by the hand out of sight. Then she told me to just kiss him. I told her I couldn’t do that, I’d be too frightened, plus I never kissed a boy before, besides family. So Jenna told me to practice the whole thing with her playing the boy. She even told me to really kiss her, so I did. We wound up making out, and she told me that she had a crush on me. My point is that we stayed friends, even though I told her I wanted to be with a boy, she was okay with that. I didn’t reject her as a friend though.”

What she just said might actually work. My tears have dried up, and I have a plan now, yeah!

          The next day I take my bike to go to see Carly at her house, and I make my pitch.

“You need to just go up to Hill Billy, sorry, Billy, and take him by the hand telling him that you need to talk to him. Take him behind the portable buildings, and then just kiss him Carly. It will work, trust me.”

“No way. I can’t do that.”

“Why not? Are you chicken?”

“No, but I don’t know what to do.”

“Watch, just practice like I’m Billy on the playground. Come up to me and tell me that we need to talk.”

“Okay.” She walks away from me, and then back to me. “Billy, I have to talk to you now.”

“Okay, grab his hand, and pull him along with you, don’t take no for an answer.”

She grabs my hand and pulls me with her to the other side of her room. “Okay, then what? We’re out of sight now.”

“Now tell him that you have to kiss him, and do it right away, get a hold of him so he can’t get away.”

She grabs me, and pulls me to her, looking me in the eyes with determination. “Billy, I have to kiss you.” She hugs me and pretends to kiss me.

“That isn’t going to work. Kiss him, get your lips mashed against his girl!”

She smashes her lips into mine, and my heart is beating so hard. She is so soft, and smells so good, I kiss back, and she pulls away.

“How was that?”

“Not bad.” I sigh. “But you can do better. You’re going to have to French kiss him Carly, otherwise you’ll come off as uptight.”

“I’ve never done that.”

“Give it a go Carly, you can do it.”

“What if I do it wrong?”

“Here, like this then.” I grab the back of her beautiful head and plant my lips on hers again. Then I slowly run my tongue between her soft lips, and her tongue meets mine with welcome, and we start making out deeply. She pull’s me closer and really responds, sending her tongue into my mouth. I use my lips to suck on her wet, warm tongue, and she moans. My hands are instinctively draw to grasp her bottom through her tight jeans, she moans again. In a moment one of my hands has pulled back to rub her crotch through her jeans. She really moans, and kisses me back wetly. I rub gently, but faster and faster just over her magic spot. In no time I feel wetness soaking through. She pulls back biting her lip as she thrusts her pelvis at me. I rub faster, and a little harder. Suddenly her crotch is soaked, and she squeals, covering her mouth quickly.

          Carly pushes her self away from me. “Oh…oh…god…what just happened? No…no, you need to go Steph… now. Please you need to leave now. That didn’t happen…no.”

“Oh Carly, god…I’m sorry. I just got carried away…I don’t know what came over me. Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not Steph, but you have to go now!” She points to the door, and I can see the confusion on her face.

“I’m sorry Carly.” I run from her home crying. I know I went too far, way too fast, but she seemed to be enjoying it.

          On the way home on my bike, I can barely see from the tears. I just hope that Carly will forgive me; that was so stupid! No, she hates me now. I don’t blame her, after I molested her like that. Suddenly I hear tires screeching and I go flying in the air as a car hits me.

          I open my eyes from darkness, and see my dad leaning over me, crying. He kisses my forehead. “You are going to be okay Stephanie my baby. Yes, you’re going to be fine.”

“What happened dad?” I look around and see I’m in a hospital room. Melissa is right there by me too, also crying and holding my hand.

“You were hit by a car baby.” He tells me softly. “We’re lucky though, just a broken arm and a concussion. A couple stiches too. You will heal baby.” He kisses me again.

I look down and see my left arm in a cast, and then the aching sets in.

          After a few minutes of them loving me, Melissa asks, “Steph, do you feel like having a visitor. Someone else has been waiting to see you too.”

I nod, and she takes dad’s hand leading him from the room. “We’ll be back in just a few minutes.” She smiles at me.

Just after they leave, Carly comes in holding a bouquet of beautiful yellow tulips.

Tears are in her pretty eyes, and I smile at her.

“Oh god Steph, I’m glad you’re going to be okay.” She sets the flowers on a table with some other arrangements. “I’m so sorry for sending you off like that Steph. I just freaked out, I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

“I’m the one who needs forgiving Carly. I’m sorry.”

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong Steph. I just should have known. The way you are always so glad to see me, and how you are into boys hobbies.” She comes and holds my good hand. “You really are something else girl. I do like you, yes and that was intense, but it’s not going to happen again Steph. I like boys.”

“Please just lets be friends still Carly, please.”

“Of course were still friends girl, you’re my BFF.” She giggles squeezing my hand. “Just don’t try anything like that again, okay?”

“Okay.”

“And quit riding your bike like a damn maniac.”

We both laugh.

          On my twelfth birthday dad gives me a very special treat. He takes me out onto Offutt Air Force base, the headquarters of Strategic Air Command; where dad is now a one star General, and pretty much has the run of the place. He takes me and gets me fitted with a flight suit, and a helmet. I know what’s up now, as I have been bugging him to take me for a ride for a while.

“What are you taking me up in dad?”

“Here’s the deal Steph, when we roll up to the bird, you have to correctly identify it, or we don’t fly.”

“No sweat, I know the whole inventory dad.” One of my hobbies is a strange one for a girl, but I like to build model aircraft, and to learn about them all too. My dream is to be an Air Force pilot like my dad, and I can already out fly him on the computer combat flight simulator program he got for us. He encourages my dream, and has promised to take me up when I got old enough. Well I just did get old enough it seems.

          We are driven in an Air Force SUV to a bird I know well, but I am going to take a close look to see if it has any modifications to it. As I inspect the bird my dad taunts me, “Oh come on! This should be an easy one.”

“It is an RF four E.”

“Oh, so close girl. Maybe next time.”

“You’re full of it General dad. Let’s go!”

He laughs, and after I am in the G-suit the ground crew helps me into, he leads me up the loading platform stairs. A ground crewman then helps me into the rear seat, and buckles me in with the harness. He explains the ejection procedure to me, and I nod. I already know it. Then he hooks up my G-suit, and plugs my helmet speakers into the console. Finally he attaches my oxygen mask to my helmet. In a few moments the loading platform is wheeled away, then I look over all the many intricate looking controls. The engines are started up from the small jet engine in the ground vehicle used by the crew. Our engine’s whine is far louder than the starter’s. When the crew clears away, one of them signals dad to start his taxi.