Starless Nights (Hale Brothers Series Book 2) (27 page)

“I don’t care how long . . . I just want to be with you.”

We walk into the dunes and I lay down the blanket on a flat area. Leila sits down on the blanket first and I can’t help but stare down at her. Part of me is so happy to be here with her right now, but another part of me hurts knowing that when the sun rises tomorrow, she’ll pretend like this night never existed, and she’ll be gone.

“Are you going to join me?” She looks up at me.

“Yeah, sorry.” Sitting next to her out here, where there is no one around, and no one can see us in the midst of all of the sea oats, my body begins to hum with awareness.

“Can I ask you a question?” She doesn’t face me. She just stares out at the water.

“Sure,” I say while lying down, tucking my hands under my head.

“What happened to us?” she asks softly.

“You know what happened to us. You were there . . .”

“I just don’t understand. Why didn’t yo—”

I can’t get in to this with her. Not right now. I move one of my hands and place it on her back.

“Hey,” I say to her.

She turns angling her body toward mine and looks down at me. I can see the tears shimmering in her eyes and I feel exactly the same way.

“Let’s not do this tonight, okay? It’s a really beautiful night and with you leaving . . . I’d rather remember things this way, with you under the stars, wouldn’t you?”

She nods her head and I pull on her. She shifts her weight, curls up next to me on her side, and lays her head down on my chest.

Time passes and I run my hand up and down her arm that’s draped over me. Her hand runs across my chest and down over my stomach. There is no way I can stop the reaction that this is causing; my stomach muscles tighten and my whole body freezes.

“Beau . . .”

“Mmm hmm.”

She hesitates before speaking and her fingers tangle in my shirt. “I want you to be my first.” She says this so quietly, that I’m certain she didn’t just say what I think she said. I don’t say anything in response, and Leila tenses, pulls off of me, sits up, and wraps her arms around her legs. She looks back out to the water and her face is so sad.

“Wait. What?” I sit up so I’m more on her level. She looks at me. There’s embarrassment written all over her face and I’m sure she can see the confusion on mine.

“I want it to be you,” she whispers again.

“Want me to be what?” A breeze blows over us and I tuck a few loose strands of her hair behind her ear.

She doesn’t say anything. She just looks at me with trepidation.

I’m stunned into silence.

“Lei, you don’t know what you are asking of me.”

“I do know what I am asking. I’ve done nothing but think about this and . . . please it has to be you.”

I understand why she is saying this, I really do. Despite all of the problems that the two of us have had over the years, this pull, this connection between us, we’ve always had it. I think back to when we were younger. I would’ve done anything for her then, and it seems I will now too.

For just a moment, she leans forward and rests her forehead against mine. Her eyes are closed and her hand reaches up to touch my face. Her fingertips still and her pulse lightly thumps on my skin. It’s beating fast and it matches mine. She lets out a small sigh and I breathe in the sweetness of her breath. She’s nervous, but then again, so am I.

I’m not going to make her beg. I’m sure it was hard enough for her to ask me this, and the truth is, I want it with her too. I’ve always wanted her.

Leaning closer, my thumbs press up under her chin and my lips brush against hers. Her fingers slip around and into my hair, bringing us closer. It’s official . . . I’m done.

“Please make love to me,” she mumbles against my lips.

Shifting slightly, I pull back and look at her beautiful face. She’s always been so easy for me to read that I need to know for certain that she really wants this.

Her eyes are warm and excited. She gives me a small smile and I fall in love with her all over again right here, under our stars.

“Okay,” I whisper.

Her smile widens.

My fingers trace down her neck, over her collarbone, and to the swell of her breasts. Endless amounts of time, I have spent fantasizing over what it would be like to taste her skin, see her, be with her, and now, within two months, she’s given it all to me—all of her.

Slowly, with trembling fingers, I pull on one of her dress straps and it slips over her shoulder. Just this one tiny section where the indent between her collarbone, shoulder, and neck meet, it’s so sexy.

Lowering my mouth, my tongue swipes across her skin, and she moans. With very clear purpose, I kiss and lick my way up her neck and back to her mouth. She doesn’t hesitate kissing me in return. She really does want this.

Leila lies back on the blanket and I lean over her. Between Sirius and the moon, up close, I can see every detail of her perfectly—even her tiny freckles.

“You are so beautiful.”

“So are you,” she whispers back to me. My heart squeezes because I wonder if she would still think that if she saw all of me.

“You alright?” she asks.

“Yeah, sorry,” I say blinking away the image.

“Thought I lost you there for a second.”

“No, I’m here. I’m very here.”

She pulls me down and her lips and mouth steal my breath. I’m trying to remember to breathe, but being this close to her and knowing what is about to happen, I keep forgetting.

My hand moves over her breast and I pause to take in the changes to her body from over the last couple of years. Her body really is something amazing and knowing that I get to do this with her, excites me even further. Through the fabric of her dress, my thumb runs over her and her grip on me tightens.

Pulling down the other strap, my fingers trail along the freckles on her collarbone, and then dip inside the edge of her dress. Slowly, I pull it down and leave her top half in nothing but a strapless bra. Her breathing picks up as I lean over and run my nose across her skin. It’s so warm and she smells so good.

Moving one cup of her bra away, I get my first glimpse of Leila in an intimate way. I’m speechless at the perfection of her. She fills my hand. I squeeze her lightly and I just can’t wait any longer to taste her.

My mouth closes over her and she arches her back and moans. It’s the sexiest thing I have ever heard. Spending equal amounts of time on both sides, I can’t get enough of her.

Eventually, I push the bra back into place and I return to her mouth. A few weeks ago, we perfected kissing each other, so there’s no hesitation here. Just complete desire.

My hands tangle in her hair and no part of her mouth is left unexplored. Her lips are so soft and she tastes better than anything I have ever tasted. My need to completely devour every part of her is overwhelming.

Lying down next to her, her hand moves from my hip, across my stomach, and lower. There’s no hiding how much I want to be with her. Tentatively her fingers brush against me and then she cups me through my jeans. I push into her hand. It feels so good to be touched by her.

At the same time, I gently caress her outer thigh, pushing her dress up and out of the way. Slowly, my fingers drift to the inside of her legs. Her reflexes have her attempting to close them for a breath, but she opens up wider for me.

Higher and higher my fingers slide up her smooth skin, until I reach the lace edge of her underwear. Placing my hand on her, I run it over her backside, and then move to the front. She lets out a sigh as my fingers drift down over the sensitive parts of her.

Pulling away, I look into her beautiful eyes, and smile.

She smiles back, while unbuckling my belt. The leather easily gives. She undoes the button and lowers the zipper.

I can’t believe this is about to happen and then it does. Her hand finds its way into my pants and wraps around me. I’m momentarily frozen as she explores all of me and then begins to move her hand up and down.

She snuggles in a little closer to me and my fingers slide down between her legs. This snaps me out of my trance.

Gently pushing her underwear to the side, my fingers brush over her and take their time memorizing every detail. Slipping in and out, she’s so soft and responsive. If I thought she was going to be uncomfortable with me touching her, my uneasiness is put to rest by the serene look I find spread across her face.

I’m not sure how much time passes, while we lie here learning and enjoying the way each other feels and how we react to each other’s touch. Her hand moves at the perfect speed with the perfect amount of tension, and her mouth as she kisses me, makes me delirious. I’m so close to going over the edge and I can feel the same from her. Mirroring the movement with purpose, her breathing picks up.

Turning her head, she tucks it into my neck, and her hand comes to a stop. Rolling her hips against my hand, her back arches, and she breathes out a small moan. Every muscle in her tenses and so do I.

I stand corrected, this is the sexiest sound I have ever heard.

Her body is on fire. I can feel every one of her pulse points throb against me at a thunderous pace. Her neck where she’s lying on my arm, her wrist as it sits against my lower abdomen, and of course my hand. A smile stretches across my face, and a swell of pride surges through my system that I can make her feel this way. Leila owns me, she always has, but in this moment, right here, right now, I feel like she belongs to me too. She’s finally mine.

She eventually relaxes, and I sit up. I can’t take it anymore. Moving between her legs, I sit back on my heels and look down at her. Her lips are swollen from being thoroughly kissed, her cheeks are flushed, and she’s breathing hard. Her eyes are so big and bright, if I didn’t know any better, I would swear that there was love shining out of them.

Reaching under the skirt of her dress, I hook on to her underwear, pull them down and off. I don’t know which one of us is trembling more. Grabbing a condom out of my wallet, she watches my every move as I slip it on.

“Are you sure about this?” I ask her as I lean down over her.

“Yes,” she whispers.

The tip of me brushes against her and I think there’s a good possibility that I might die in this moment.

Easing into her just a little bit, she closes her eyes, and lets out another moan. “Beau, that feels so good.”

Wrapping my hands around her head, her beautiful blue eyes open and lock onto mine. She knows what’s coming and I hope she can see that I’m sorry I’m about to hurt her.

Slowly, I move in and out, letting her adjust to me, pushing further each time until finally, I slide all the way into her and through that last barrier. She feels incredible and my body is screaming for me to move, but my heart has me paused as I’m realizing that just when I’ve made her mine, she’s leaving. A lump forms in the back of my throat and she stiffens underneath me. I stop breathing to keep us completely still.

“Are you okay?” I ask her, just barely in a whisper. Her eyes are squeezed shut.

“Mmm hmm. Just give me second.” Her voice shakes.

A second. I would give her forever.

She shifts slightly as she begins to relax underneath me, and I’m struggling. “Lei, you need to lie completely still, or let me start moving because I don’t think that I’m going to last too long.”

She opens her eyes again and gives me a small smile. “That’s okay. I’ve already gotten what I asked for . . . you.”

Lowering my head, my lips brush against hers.

“Leila . . .” My chest aches.

“I know Beau,” she says with tears in her eyes.

Tucking my head into her neck, I slowly slide back out. She feels so good. Instinctually, I want to grab on and move, but this isn’t about just me, and this moment is so much bigger than an instinct. Gently, I begin making love to the only girl that I have ever loved, under the stars.

Her moves match mine like we were born to be together this way. The feel of her, her touch, her taste, the sounds she’s making, I know I will wake up in the middle of the night remembering and reliving this moment with her.

Kissing Leila, I don’t know where one of us begins and the other ends. We are completely connected. In my mind it’s like we are a circle, a ring, we are two complete halves that make a whole.

She lifts her legs, wraps them around my waist, and I’m done for. I couldn’t stop if I tried. Together we move exactly the way I need us to.

Every part of me is tense to the point it’s almost unbearable. The need for this, the need for her, I’m chasing release in so many different ways. Keeping one arm next to her head to hold my weight up, my other hand slips under her to tilt her hips up, and my world explodes.

As always with Leila, my world bursts into different colors and those tiny sparks one by one land on my skin.

Slowing down to ride out this accomplished sensation, Leila squeezes her legs around me to hold me in place.

“Don’t pull out yet, please.”

“Okay, I won’t.” I’m still breathing hard and I lay my head on the blanket next to hers. Wetness hits my cheek, and I turn to see Leila’s eyes closed and tears are leaking out. I kiss my way up her face, over the tears, and lace my fingers through hers.

“Thank you,” she says to me, and all I can think to say back is the same.

“Thank you.”

I’m not sure how long I end up lying there with her wrapped up in my arms. This night is permanently etched not only in my mind but in my heart: the sound of the water, the sea oats as they sway in the breeze, and endless amounts of stars against the midnight sky.

At some point while sleeping, Leila moves off of me, and rolls onto her side facing me. It was this movement that woke me leaving me feeling completely vulnerable. Never in my wildest dreams did I think tonight would end like this. Surely, it should be our beginning.

The moonlight is bright enough that I can memorize every detail of her beautiful face. There’s a slight breeze blowing and her hair keeps fluttering across her skin. Her eyelashes are resting on her cheeks and her lips are slightly parted. She is breathtaking to me. There isn’t a person on this planet that could ever compare.