Stay With Me (15 page)

Chapter 19

Allie

I sit on the edge of his bed, running my fingers over the comforter.  It was only just hours ago we were making love beneath these sheets.  My tears start fresh and my vision becomes blurry, unable to see the time on the alarm clock.  I’ve already ripped the dress off me that Donovan bought with Claire’s money; the necklace he gave me is laying on the dresser.  My suitcase is packed and I’m waiting for my taxi to get here to take me to the bus station before I have to face anyone else in this family.  I wipe my eyes with my fingertips, look at the clock again, and see I only have ten minutes before the driver arrives.  I grab my things, which isn’t much considering he bought almost everything I brought with me and I left it on the floor.  I take one last look at Donovan’s room, etching it to memory.  I have no intention of coming back here, but for some reason, I don’t want to forget this room either.  Before I knew about the lying, I believed that he might actually be starting to love me.

What an idiot I am!

He can never love anyone, except himself and Claire.  I was so stupid to think he was completely over her.  If he was, he would have moved out of the house she bought for him and found something else.  Or, at least, that’s what I would do in his situation.  I would break all ties from that woman.  Then again, I’m not him.  I shudder as I release a heavy sigh, my body unable to cry anymore for that man.  The door creaks open and I exit the room.  I rest my back against the wall; I feel like I’m going to pass out.  I slide all the way down the wall, so that my bottom’s on the floor and I cradle my knees.  I gently rock back and forth, trying to soothe my frazzled nerves.

“I shouldn’t stay here too long.  The cab will be here soon,”  I say to myself.  I stand and make myself walk down the stairs to the front foyer.  I stop only to look at myself in the mirror.  The reflection isn’t the one I recognize.  This girl has red, puffy eyes and she looks utterly defeated.  Her hair is pulled into a ponytail; her blue tank top and khaki shorts a bit wrinkled.  Her heart is now broken.  I bow my head, not wanting to see anymore and quietly slip out the front door.

The sun is still too bright and I grab my sunglasses from my purse.  As I cover my eyes, I hear my name.  “Allie!  Are you here?”  It’s Donovan and it’s coming from the back of the house.

I don’t answer; I can’t answer.  I can’t look at him and turn into a sobbing, weak female.  I will not allow him to do that to me.  I park my butt on the front step of the porch and wait as patiently as I can for my ride to show up.  

“Allie!  Please, I need to talk to you!”

“Oh, now you want to talk?” I mutter under my breath.  
Isn’t that convenient for him?
  After his old friend spilled the beans on how Donovan really is, now he wants to talk?  What bullshit.  I remain quiet, hoping he doesn’t come around the front until I’m gone.  

Just then, I see the green taxi cab coming down the drive, so I stand with my bag in hand.  That’s when he comes around the corner, looking frantic and wide eyed.

“Allie?  What are you doing?” His voice is quiet as he approaches me slowly, his eyes still wide.

“Get away from me, please.  There is nothing more to say.  I know everything, okay?”  I back up a step as I try to keep the resolve in my voice; instead, it trembles and shows I’m on the verge of tears.

“Please, talk to me.  I’m so sorry.  You have no idea how much I wanted to tell you everything.” He continues walking towards me, his hand reaching out for mine.

No way, buddy
.

“The time for talk is over, Donovan.  You had a million chances to tell me about your past.  In fact, you said that I practically
begged
for answers.  But the only ones you gave me were lies,” I hiss, my tone laced with rage.  “I told you everything!  You couldn’t tell me about Claire giving you all that money for your school and whatever else you wanted.  She even bought you that house; the house where we...” I can’t do it.  I can’t talk about us making love in a house that was bought with life insurance money from her dead husband.  The taxi pulls up alongside me.  “Goodbye.”

“No, please don’t say goodbye.  It sounds so...final.”  His blue eyes are spilling over with tears and I turn my head so I don’t see them.  It only makes me feel worse; makes me think he actually cares.  

“It is final.” I grab the door handle to the car.  “I told you before, I hate liars.  That’s all you’ve done to me is feed me crap.  I don’t know what I can believe anymore.”

“I will tell you everything, I swear.  Give me a chance to explain.”  He falls to his knees and clasps his hands together.  “Please, don’t leave me.
 Stay with me
.  I’m begging you.”  His eyes never leave mine, even though my glasses cover them.  I can’t believe he’s doing this right now.  I don’t know whether to be embarrassed or flattered.  Right now, I only feel hurt and betrayal.

I look at the driver and I stick up my pointer finger, letting him know I just need a minute.  He nods, then stares back in front of him.  Thank God he’s not paying any attention to the scene outside his car.  I place my bag down and take a small step toward the man that is groveling at my feet.

“Is it true?”

He breaks the stare and looks down at the ground, his hands gripping his knees.  I already know the answer.  He opens his mouth to speak, but I cut him off.  “When you decide you want to be forthcoming, maybe that’s when I’ll talk to you.  Right now, I need to get away from you.”  I turn my back to him, pick up my things, and open the door.  I turn to look at him one more time, wanting to remember his face, his mouth, his eyes.  I know I won’t see them again, and even if he has caused me a world of hurt, I love this man.  

The man I see, on the ground looking dejected and pitiful, is not the Donovan I know.  Just like my reflection, it is someone totally different.  He’s usually confident and has a million dollar smile, making everyone swoon over him.  His eyes lock on mine for just a minute and I know there is regret and sadness there, but I can’t let that stop me from leaving.  I have to leave.  I can’t think clearly right now, and time away is what I need.  

He stands and I eye him, unsure what he’s going to do.  “Can I have one last kiss before you go?” he whispers.  

“Uh, I don’t know if that’s a good...” and before I can finish my sentence, his mouth is on mine.  He is gentle and tender, not hungry for sex.  There is something different in the way he’s kissing me and it breaks my heart even more.  His tongue parts my lips and I try to fight it.  Oh, how I try to fight it.  But it’s always the same; I give him what he wants and deep down, I want it to. But my stubbornness wins out and I find the strength to push him away before I get sucked back in.  “Goodbye, Donovan.” I turn away, slide into the seat, and shut the door.  

I watch him as the driver begins to take off, and Donovan tries to keep up with the cab.  I look straight ahead as he screams my name again, begging me to stay.  As we make our way down the drive, I can no longer hold back my tears and sob uncontrollably.  Thank God, the cabbie ignores my bawling in his backseat and turns on the radio.  I’ll be damned if that song by Hunter Hayes,
Wanted
, starts playing and I lose it all over again.  I cry the entire way to the Greyhound station.

Chapter 20

Donovan

“She’s gone?  Why?” Megan asks.  “What the hell happened?”

“Frankie was at the wedding.  He told her about Claire buying my house and paying for school.  But he didn’t tell her everything.  He only told her what he thought would hurt her, and me.”  I lay on my bed, still in my tux.  When Allie left me in the driveway, I came back in here.  I laid in the bed where we last made love and clutched the diamond pendant she left behind.  When I didn’t come back to the party, my baby sister came looking for me.  She found me like this, an absolute train wreck.

“Oh, geez, Donnie.  You never told her?” She slaps her forehead.  “All you had to do is tell her the truth.  That Claire bought you the house and gave you all the money, but all you had to do is tell her what you did to break ties with her.”

“Look, Megan.  You don’t know everything either,” I snap and I’m sorry as soon as the words come out.  If I’m going to be honest about everything, I might as well start with Megan.  With a heavy heart, I begin to tell her about the affair and when it actually started.  I told her that Frankie caught us, and told his dad.  I told her all the details, minus the sex parts.  

“So, it’s true.  You had an affair with a married woman, who is sitting in prison for killing her husband.  She got the insurance money, broke you off a piece of the cash, then placed it in a bunch of different banks?” She’s sitting on the end of the bed, staring off into space.  She does that when she’s trying to wrap her mind around something.  

“Yes, it’s true.  But can you understand why I didn’t want to tell Allie all this?  If you’re having a hard time swallowing it, how do you think she would have done?  You’ve known me your whole life, and she’s only been around me for less than two months.”

“Donnie, I understand your point of view, really, I do.  But you have to understand that Allie feels like your relationship is a total lie.  You gotta go after her and be
completely
honest.” She emphasizes the last two words.

“She doesn’t want to see me again.  You should have seen the way she pulled away from me when I tried to kiss her after it was said and done.”  I close my eyes; they are already hurting from the crying and now they sting from the new tears trying to fall.  “How do I know she will listen to me?”

“Brother, I know she will.  Right now, maybe she won’t, but she will someday.  I can tell you both are crazy in love with each other.  A love like that only comes once in a lifetime.”  Then, she lets out a giggle.  “Of course, Adam is not that guy that for me.  Did I tell you I caught him hitting on our cousin?”  Surprisingly, Megan seems calm telling me she just broke up with the guy she’s been with for over a year.

“I knew he was a douchebag.  I told you”

“Yeah, he is a jerk.  But as you can see, I’m not nearly as upset as you are.  That right there tells me you love her.  I’ve never seen you cry except when grandpa died, at the trial and right now.  You told me you didn’t even cry when our mother left us.”  Megan’s blue eyes look through to my heart and I know she’s right.  I’m not a crier whatsoever, but right now, I feel like my heart was ripped out and stomped on.  I love Allie and I have to tell her everything, even if she hates me forever.  I spring out of bed and grab my duffel bag.  “What are you doing?”

“Going after her, what do you think?”  I rush into the bathroom and shed my tux.  I quickly throw on my khaki shorts and white t-shirt.  “You’re right. I’m not going to let her walk out of my life without a fight.”

“Now, that’s the brother I know and love,” she exclaims, clapping her hands together.  “Now, go get her!”

I step out of the bathroom and ask her to return the tuxedo for me.  “And please tell Gabe and Stace I’m sorry that I had to run.”  

She nods and throws her arms around my neck.  “Good luck,  I know she loves you.”

Her words encourage me, and I pray she’s right.  I dart out of the room and zoom down the stairs.  Of course, I run into Donna.

“Donnie, dahling, where are you going?  The party is full swing.” Her voice is sickening sweet and it makes my stomach lurch.

“Not going. I’m on my way to get Allie back.  Tell Gabe I’m sorry.” I try to push past her, but she blocks my way.

“Are you going after that little bitch?” Her tone turns cold and enraged, so much I take a step back.  “Why don’t you just forget about her?  I told you last night, you shouldn’t have brought her here.  Claire would be furious.”

“You know what, Donna?  I know that you think I have some sort of obligation to Claire, but I don’t anymore.  I cut her off completely.  Why the hell do you insist that we’re going to get back together anyways?”  It takes everything in me not to slap her, but I refuse to hit a woman, even her.  Although, I’m not sure it would hurt her since her face is made of plastic.

“Because, I know you will.  She’s good for you.  Look at what she made you become!  She gave you another chance at life.  Don’t you see that?” Her hands go to her hips and her black eyebrows furrow.  

“First off, she didn’t make me a doctor, I did!  She may have funded it, but I made it through at the top of my class.  I told her I would pay her back, but she didn’t want it.  She may have bought my house.  But I had her name taken off the mortgage after I got my trust fund from Grandpa and paid it in full.”  I try to swallow the hate down that I feel for both Donna and Claire, then I continue.  “Then I donated every penny of the money she gave me to the Children’s Hospital in Atlanta.  Besides, why the hell do you care?”

Her face drops.  “You mean, you gave five million dollars away?”

“Are you kidding me?  I didn’t use it on selfish things and I didn’t just give it away.  I donated it and the hospital got a new CT scanner with it.”  I shake my head, totally disgusted by this woman.  “You got issues, Donna.  You should really seek some help for that.” I weave my way around her and head out the front door.  

“You know, she’ll be getting out soon.  She will find you when she does.  You should be ready, Donovan,” she yells after me, but I pay her no mind.  She’s just an insane piece of trash that happened to find a man that would put up with her shit; poor dad.  Claire’s not getting out anytime soon, and if she does, I don’t plan on being around.  If I thought she was nuts before she got arrested, I don’t want to think of what a few years in prison have done to her.  I shudder at the thought of her being paroled.  I hope to God that doesn’t happen.