Stray (31 page)

"No, we were just going to take you over the ship beforehand, but that can keep.  I'll send someone with breakfast for you a zelkasse before we're due out.  Go back to sleep."

I seem to have said: "Margle margle," back at her, and have no idea what I was trying to say.  When my alarm went off I didn't feel much better, but stumbled into the shower and put it on full-force icy, and was trying to do something with my hair when Lohn and Mara showed up with soup and chewy black bread and a hot, sweet milky drink.

"Nice circles," Lohn said, flicking my cheek.  "There's pl
enty of time to get to the hangar, so don't feel rushed."

"How long flight Muina?"

"Nearly a kasse, if you take into account all the pre-flight fussing and actually getting to the gate and deep-space, and then we have perhaps another kasse getting from the gate point to your village.  Maze was planning to use the time for a briefing, but I suspect he'd rather you slept than listened at this point.  He'll email you an outline."  Lohn grinned, stretching himself out on one of my couches.  "I wish I could hear whatever he's saying to Research."

"Three different teams were working with you, two specifically on the aether effect," Mara said.  "It had become something of a competition between them.  And since Muina expeditions are considered so dangerous, they appear to have felt they should do as much as they could in case they didn't have a chance to test you further."

At that point I only had a vague impression that I'd somehow been swearing at Zee, and asked: "Has First Squad been Muina before?" while I looked back at whatever I'd been saying to her.

"Just once.  Even though the Setari have a far better chance of survival than any of the previous expeditions, at the same time we've been considered too valuable to risk.  Knowing about the presence of aether is a major step toward understanding at least a few of our losses."  Mara shook her head.  "It's still a gamble though, and since half the reason we're going is to observe how the planet reacts to you, it really would help if you were more than barely conscious.  There'll be some revision of how you're assigned in future to inject some continuity and common sense."

"Don't know why tired," I said.  "Sleep all yesterday, should be too awake now."  But everything seemed a lot of effort, including trying to speak in the wrong language, so I concentrated on eating and then trying to get my hair less tangled.  Lohn chattered along blithely, but I can see in retrospect that he was watching me closely.

We headed down in plenty of time, arriving maybe twenty minutes before the marked boarding time, but I wasn't the least surprised to see a lot of people already there, if not yet on board.  Parts of Third, Fourth and Seventh Squad, for once not all standing apart in their own little groups.  The ship was either the same or very similar to the one I'd first seen on Muina, with a big boarding ramp lowered, and a bunch of greensuits fussing about.

Eeli from Third bounced over as soon as she saw me, ecstatically happy and enthused about the excursion.  I really wasn't equal to dealing with her, the stream of comment and questions washing over me as just noise, and it was only when she paused and Mara said "I'd like to hear that too," that I had any chance of catching up.  She'd been fascinated by what I'd said in the Pillar and wanted to hear the rest of the poem.

"After mission?"  I offered.  "Will try work out translation."

Eeli mainly wanted to hear it in English, apparently, because she wanted to 'feel' it with Symbol Sight, but was satisfied with a promise to recite it on the trip back.  Given I was having trouble remembering my own name, multi-stanza poetry in any language just wasn't going to happen.  But Lohn and Mara rescued me from further enthusiasm and took me onto the ship, which was called the
Litara
, only to deliver me up as a sacrifice to Ista Tremmar.

I don't mind Ista Tremmar.  She's pretty strict, but nice enough, and not one of the people who had been doing experiments on me.  Not lately anyway.  She gave me a quick, thorough exam, asking lots of questions about how much I'd been sleeping and when, and what I'd been eating and doing and whether I dreamed after passing out during the aether experiments or felt strange or bothered on days when there wasn't aether experiments.

When Maze arrived I was saying, maybe a bit shortly, that no I didn't think I was addicted to aether.

"Not for want of opportunity it seems," he said.  "What's your verdict, Ista?"

"Beyond straightforward exhaustion, and perhaps some mild anaemia, I've found nothing of note.  The best I can suggest from Harl and Luar's early results, is that the aether is acting as a stimulant."  She turned back to me.  "When you lose consciousness under the influence of the aether, your brain activity monitor doesn't show any of the patterns of sleep.  Better considered a type of paralysis, perhaps, and though I don't see any record of an energy expenditure analysis being performed, I'd be willing to bet it's more than an 'at rest' state.  In the previous tests, you've had the rest of the day for the aether to wear off, and have slept normally.  Yesterday would have represented a massive overdose of stimulant, on top of several days of steady exposure.  Your system, although not apparently negatively affected by aether, needed to rid itself of the aether's effect before you could sleep, and then of course you crashed quite severely."  She switched back to Maze.  "I don't see any reason not to go ahead.  I'll re-examine her after she's rested, but consider her cleared for duty."

"And even on schedule," Maze said and when Ista Tremmar left looked at me a long moment, then said: "This won't be allowed to happen again, but I will ask that you speak to one of us if you're being pushed unreasonably."  He didn't give me a chance to respond, just started walking, gesturing for me to follow.  "The only thing I had meant to check, before this happened, was to confirm that you had seen an entrance below the central amphitheatre, but hadn't ventured into it."

"Too dark," I said, shrugging.

"Did you have any sense of threat from it, or the amphitheatre in particular?"

"Amphitheatre where all cats live," I said, pausing in the entrance of a room with the tiered pod-seat things I remembered from my first trip.  First and Third Squad were sitting about sideways on the seats with the covers up.  "Super feral unfriendly cats.  Don't have to worry about petting them."

"I know," Maze said, and gave me one of his awesome smiles.  "You won't make the same mistake twice.  Get some rest now."

There were only the two chairs still empty, in the corner on our left.  I picked the upper tier one, smiling at Zee across the way, and then squirming as the chair began moulding itself around me.  I was too tired to care much about anything else, not even that Taarel was watching from the opposite corner.  Maze closed the cover of my seat as soon as I lay down, and I pretty much passed out instantly.

Zee woke me up with another override channel request.  "Human yet?"

"Maybe half."  I started to sit up and almost whacked my head on the seat cover, then finished the movement as Zee opened it.

"Back to medical.  I know you're looking forward to that."

"Zee's turn be comedian."  I did feel better, though.  Groggy, but no longer like I was being sucked down into a black pit.  Ista Tremmar looked me over, told me I had to eat a high-energy, high-protein diet until further notice, and pointed the way to the nearest bathroom.  Washing my face helped, and Zee nodded approval when I came out.

"Next stop, a little food.  We'll be landing in about twelve joden.  Read Maze's mission outline first, and let me know if you have any questions."

There's a hundred joden in a kasse, so that was a little over twenty minutes.  I just nodded.  I was feeling placid, really wanting another day or two of sleep, but willing to go along with whatever was asked of me so long as it didn't require too much thought.  I read Maze's email, and Zee's from early that morning about taking a tour of the ship.  It really is a big ship, with all those little 'pods' used when travelling through the gate, enough to cover a sizeable greensuit and greysuit complement.  There's the infirmary and a kitchen and canteen and laboratories and assembly areas.

The mission was pretty basic.  All four squads would go ashore in my town, split into two groups and do an initial reconnoitre and check the drones.  I would be with First and Third Squad, answering any questions it occurred to them to ask me, and their Sight talents would be paying a lot of attention to whether there was an unusual reaction from the places around me.

They were very interested in the amphitheatre, but also wary of it since the aether had drained there, so it would be part two of the outing.  We'd all meet up there and poke our nose cautiously underneath and see whether anything bit it off.  In other words, the mission outline was "wander around looking for anything interesting, try not to get killed".

Four squads makes for a lot of people in the mission channel, along with two non-Setari people staying on the
Litara
, whose names were Kensan and Tehara.  And me.  Greensuits ferried us ashore using the hovering sled things before returning to the ship, and I wondered vaguely why they didn't leave any for us to escape with as I followed Ketzaren off onto the rocky bank.

It was the same spot I'd been picked up from – it seemed like an eternity ago – and since Sonn was standing right next to me I caught her eye and said: "Full circle," but though I think she understood what I meant she was being all serious and didn't respond.

Ferus, though, was a different kettle of fish.  "What was it you were cooking here?"  he asked, nodding at the faint remains of my fires and the three massive flat bowls.  "I've often wondered if you could possibly eat that much."

"Boiling wool," I said, shrugging.  "Clean it, make blanket."  Come to think of it, I don't think I actually
cooked
anything the entire time I was on Muina.  I never managed to catch any fish, or find any eggs.  Survivor Cass was barely making a passing grade.

It was colder than it had been when I'd been living there.  Autumn-ish, with a sharp wind blowing over the lake which made me gladder than ever that I'd been rescued.  If the town has a proper European-type Winter, I would not only have needed a whole lot more wool, I'd be facing some real food challenges.

I've written all of this entry so far without mentioning Ruuel, mainly because I hadn't seen much of him.  But he was just a little way down the shore from me then, and said: "No sense of threat," and sometimes I wonder if he goes around deliberately striking dramatic poses, because whenever I let myself look at him he seems to be being particularly photogenic.  Though I guess gazing intently into the distance is part of his job description.

"We'll take the half to the left," Maze said.  "Be vocal."

I was glad the squads were divided the way they had been.  Not so much for controlling my urge to gaze at Ruuel, since I'm more or less managing that, but because that shot Forel from Seventh Squad had taken at Zan was a good way to get me to distrust her totally.  Other than looking even more cat-that-got-the-cream than usual, she was being very correct, but I was happy to be with First Squad and Third Squad.

Particularly because Eeli was very fun to watch, so overjoyed at her first time on Muina that she practically vibrated.  Occasionally a little comment would burble out, but mostly she was just eyes everywhere.  Once, Taarel touched her shoulder and gave her a little smile and she settled down a bit.  We walked about the town, not seeing anything other than small abandoned town.  Sefen, Third's strongest Place Sight talent, could see only a faint after-image of aether, just a haziness.

I spent the time reminiscing, working on a translation of "Do Not Go Gentle" for later, and wondering if Ruuel was annoyed with himself for not having seen anything significant about this town when they chased the Ddura here.

Maze's 'be vocal' apparently meant to communicate a lot as we explored, but I only heard Forel, Auron and Halla say anything from the other group.  Eventually Maze told everyone to return to the shore to collect the new drones they'd left there, and head toward the amphitheatre.

The drone left by greensuits before the last moonfall had exploded.  They'd been expecting this, since it wasn't transmitting, but spent a small age doing examinations and taking readings and putting another drone in its place.  I watched the cats, which had all retreated to the far side of the amphitheatre and were watching us back, tremendously annoyed.

While Third Squad messed with the remains of the drone, Fourth and Seventh Squad took me down to examine the extra-big central circle.  Even enhanced, none of them could make out anything more from it than an after-image of the aether.  Having me stand in the middle made no difference.

"Should we clear these animals out?"  Tsennan asked.

At the time I just thought he was a gung-ho idiot, and only glanced at him as Sonn straightforwardly said: "No threat."  It's only thanks to my ever-present log that a later review gave me a peripheral view of Forel shifting to watch me beforehand.  They were seeing if they could get a rise out of me because of Ghost.  My log also showed Ruuel turn his head in Forel's direction, but he didn't react otherwise.  Still, if I was her I wouldn't play petty games in front of Sight talents.  Particularly since she seems pretty keen on making herself look good in front of that particular Sight talent.

The four squad captains on this trip were a soap opera in the making.  Forel seems to want to impress Ruuel.  Ruuel, well, I don't know for sure, but he seems to spend an awful lot of time with Taarel.  I'm trying to pretend that doesn't really mean anything.  Taarel, at least that one time while we were out in the city, seems intense about Maze.  And Maze isn't playing romance any more.

Not having seen this at the time, I just shrugged off the whole thing and went back to thinking about poetry translations and the embarrassment involved in walking around my town with an escort of twenty-four psychic space ninjas who all seemed to think far more was going to happen than I did.  I can't say I ever held great expectations for the outing, given that I'd lived there for a month, and the Setari had already gone over the place, if only casually.  I wasn't the least surprised when we all went down underneath the amphitheatre and found no monsters, just a short white corridor which curved down to an empty circular room with a round, thigh-high platform in the middle.  I was pondering the less-than-fun prospect of returning to do this again, except with me probably having to get drunk on aether again, when Sefen from Third looked across at Ruuel and said: "I don't even begin to understand what I'm seeing here."

"It feels like a gate," Taarel said.  "But–"

"No, not a gate."  Ruuel moved to my left and touched my arm, frowning.  "Far more complex.  The Ena is tangible here."

Maze, who had been toting one of the replacement drones about with Telekinesis, lowered it to the ground by the outer wall.  "We did expect to find an outlet for the aether, after all."  He checked that the drone was stable and turned it on, verifying with the
Litara
that the ship was receiving the drone's transmission.  "If it's some sort of device in addition to that, what's your evaluation of function?"

There was a bit of shifting about, as the rest of the Place and Symbol Sight talents took the opportunity to enhance themselves and view the platform from different angles.  Maze was running scans with the drone.  To me it looked like nothing more than a platform: there were even steps up one side.

"Communication," Ruuel said eventually, and there were a few hesitant nods of agreement.

"Getting an aether reading from it," Maze commented, then said over the interface: "Orders?"

The bluesuit in charge, Tehara, said: "Take contact readings, but no more until we return.  Analysis of the scans taken in the interim may give us a better idea of how to approach it."

Between them the two Sight squads had four Place Sight talents.  "Go unenhanced, Sefen," Taarel said.  "We're still not entirely certain if there is any distortion in play for enhanced Sights."

He nodded while the other three – Ruuel, Halla and Marana – made their gloves flow back into the sleeves of their suits.  Place Sight talents often go about fully gloved, since touching an object can give them a deeper reading, like when Ruuel was handling my diary back in medical.  I've seen enough of
The Hidden War
now to know that Place Sight talents have a great deal of difficulty with the information they can sense, and avoid accidentally touching people and objects.  The actor on the show is always being fraught and sensitive and locked down.

Marana, a short but muscular girl from Third Squad, was first to try, but drew her hand back immediately.  "Aether effect," she said, frowning.

Halla and Ruuel both tried, but you could see it was hurting them just pressing their fingers lightly against the stone surface and they quickly stopped.

"Try nullifying the negative effects with Devlin while reading," Taarel suggested, but then she – everyone with Combat Sight – went on alert, saying: "Threat," out loud.

Most of them stepped back away from the platform, creating the nanoliquid blades from their suits.  I stepped back as well, aware of Ketzaren and Alay shifting to flank me, and then covered my ears at the sound which followed.  Whale song has nothing on it.

"Approaching rapidly," Maze said, fortunately in a pause in the noise.  "Overwhelming threat.  Get Devlin out of here."

Ketzaren started to move, but Ruuel was faster.  He didn't have time to be careful, just grabbed my wrist and yanked me forward, pressing my hand down on the platform.  The noise changed, just as loud, but a different pitch, and everyone reacted as if they'd missed being bitten by a shark.  Ruuel said something, eyes gone all narrow and extra-black, and I didn't even try and raise my voice to respond, saying: "Can't hear you over Ddura," even as I realised that I was the only one acting like I'd been trapped in a belltower at the wrong moment.

"It's a communication device," came in text through the interface.  "Communicate."

The logs attached to the mission report have twenty different views of the look I gave him in response.  An "Are you high?" caption would fit it well.  I was actually thinking "In whale song?"  But what was I going to do?  Say no?  Especially since everyone was acting as if the shark was circling for another run.

Being suddenly expected to do something instead of standing around was disconcerting to the max.  I bought some time closing my eyes and trying to sort out what I was hearing.  The Ddura noise was so drawn out and huge it was hard to encompass it.  But I was sure it wasn't words, not anything I had a chance of recognising.  It was repeating the same long 'hhhhuuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaa' over and over.  It felt like a question.  The Ddura had stopped attacking when I touched the platform and was asking me something.  So I tried to guess what an artificially created aurora cloud built to kill monsters would ask someone who showed up and tried to talk to it.

As always it sounded sad, mournful.  I had no idea if it really was, or if it that was its noise for growling boisterously, but the idea led to one obvious possibility: everyone on the planet had left.  If I thought of it as a big (huge-mungous) dog which had been bred to protect the Muinans, and then abandoned, then it would be all where is everyone, what should I do, I'm so lonely, please love me.  Sheer guesswork, but treating it like a dog was the only thing I could think of in the middle of all that noise.

Since the noise was apparently in my head, I didn't bother trying to speak, just started thinking over and over: "Shut up!  Shut up!  Be quiet!  Shut up!  Quiet!  Quiet!"

To my eternal surprise it tapered off, making a brief eager hhhhhaaaaaaa sound.  "Good Ddura," I thought, feeling mildly idiotic.  "Good Ddura.  Be quiet.  Good Ddura."

I opened my eyes, trying to think while my head recovered from its noise-pounding, and looking across at the Setari on the far side of the platform, who were watching me intently.  Immediately the Ddura made a hhhhiiiiiiiiiiii noise, not nearly so loud, but all anxious and fretful and then, "mmmnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn".

"Threat rising," Maze said, tersely.

"Stop!"  I thought.  "Down.  Friends!  Friends!"

It made the hhhiiiiiiiii noise again.  It wanted to protect me, I think.  And that was the problem: it didn't recognise the Tarens, it thought they were the enemy the same way the aether did.  And it's pretty hard to convince a dog that the scary strangers all poised to attack are friends.

Keeping my right hand on the platform, I reached to the left.  Ruuel had let go of me – I later found some nice bruises where he'd grabbed me – so I took his wrist and pressed his hand to the platform, keeping hold the same way I had Selkie during my aether testing.  "Friend," I thought, then carefully let go of Ruuel, watching him wince as the aether in the platform immediately began reacting to him.

"Friend," I thought, but was getting the hhhiiii noise again.  "Friend," I repeated, putting a lot of command into it.  "This is a Muinan.  He belongs here.  This is his home.  He belongs."

I felt something, not from the Ddura, but the platform itself seemed to go icy and slick beneath my hand and then settle down.  Ruuel straightened, eyes opening very wide, and he said: "It's not reject–"  but then the Ddura started going "Hhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!! Hhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!! Hhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!"  so loudly I swear every blood vessel in my head considered popping.  Ruuel didn't act like he could hear it, but he had both hands pressed to the platform and was talking, eyes still all wide and surprised.

"Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up!" I thought over and over at the Ddura and it quieted down a little, but kept going hhhhhaaaaaaa! in this mountainous burble.  A lot happier about Ruuel than it had been me.

"Everyone put hand," I said out loud, not even able to hear myself speak.  One thing about Setari discipline is they're quick to obey a command.  According to the logs, Maze said: "Do it," and everyone did, despite the pain it caused.

"These are Muinans," I thought, to the Ddura or the platform or both.  "They belong here.  This is their home.  They belong."

The Ddura exploded into hysteria – it really did behave a lot like an abandoned dog – and I had to resort to this kind of mental shriek in return: "SHUT UP!!!!" which startled it into pausing.  "Bad Ddura.  Be quiet.  Be quiet.  Good Ddura.  Yes.  Quiet.  Okay.  Good Ddura, you can protect the Muinans, can't you?  That's a good Ddura.  Protect the Muinans."  I paused, then looked over at the drone on the far side of the room.  "These drones belong to the Muinans.  Protect the drones.  Good Ddura."  I tried mentally picturing the
Litara
as well, but my head was pounding like anything, so have no idea if it was any use going on about: "This is a Muinan ship.  Protect the ships.  Good Ddura."

It started doing the hhhhhaaaaaaa thing again, far more interested in the Setari it could sense touching the platform than anything I was saying to it, so I sighed and gave up, rubbing my temples instead.

Ketzaren took my arm.  "Do you need to sit down?"