Strength (Mark of Nexus #1) (21 page)

I stood there like a deer in the headlights, confliction dividing my will in two. Part of me wanted to obey without question, and the other part trembled at the thought of his touch.

“Please,” he added quietly, holding out his hand.

I cringed, finally giving my mind the ounce of leeway it needed. Doubt slipped in, dark and unannounced, to weigh on my emotions. Had Wallace really taken someone’s life? Looking at his outstretched palm, all I could see was blood—slick and crimson, deceitful and cruel. I’d dismissed the notion before, but now I couldn’t seem to ditch the Lady Macbeth goggles. Was he…a killer?

“Rena.” He lowered his voice, staring at me with a pitiful mix of confusion and bewilderment. It was like staring into the face of a little boy, lost and looking for someone to cling to. “What is it?”

“Nothing.” I snatched the key without asking and crammed it into the lock on my left cuff. “Don’t worry about it.” I could hear Cole laugh behind me, but I chose to ignore it. He wouldn’t help the situation.

“A-Are you…” Wallace nearly choked on the words, lifting his brows in disbelief. “Are you afraid of me?”

My hand shook as I twisted the key in the lock, and the metal arm sprang open. I discarded the broken cuff without looking and flinched when it cracked against the floor. “No.”

“Hey.” He started to reach out and froze, half-bent to meet my eye. “Seriously. You can tell me.”

I made quick work of the other cuff. “What’ll you do, if I don’t tell you?” I forced the words out, knowing I wouldn’t have the nerve to bring it up later. “Kill me?”

All semblance of life slipped from his features, and his lips parted in shock. It was like watching someone witness a car wreck in slow motion. Helpless, sick, terrified.

My heart gave a painful squeeze. “Sorry, that was out of li—”

“You know,” he muttered, straightening with vacant resignation.

I looked down, unsure of what to say. It’d become too real. His reaction, the feeling gnawing in my chest—it wasn’t just a suspicion anymore. “It’s true, isn’t it?”

“I…I’m sorry.”

I closed my eyes and the tears I’d been holding spilled from beneath my lashes. I bit my lip and shook my head, trying to absorb the information. That wasn’t what I’d wanted to hear. All of my illusions of him were shattering, ones I hadn’t even realized I’d made.

“B-But why?”
Oh God.
I sounded like I was crying.

He hesitated before speaking, his voice barely above a whisper. “Can we discuss this outside?”

Outside? Alone? With a killer?

I glanced back at Cole through a film of blurry tears.

“Is there any point taking her outside?” Cole asked, lifting his chin toward his brother. “Dead girls don’t tell secrets, you know.”

“I got that the first time,” Wallace snapped.

“So, let me ask you again. Are you gonna go with me or not?” Cole’s voice rose in irritation. “I need an answer.”

Why was I holding my breath?

Wallace stared at me for a long moment before he spoke. “If that’s what it takes, then yes—but give me a minute to deal with her first.”

Deal with her?

“Take all the time you need,” Cole said, a smile playing at his lips as he leaned back against the wall. “She’s your problem now.” When we didn’t move, he dismissed us with a flick of his hand. “Go. I’m not gonna stop you. We’ll figure this out when you’re done.”

What had I gotten myself into?

Chapter Twenty-Two

Rain pelted the ground in icy streaks, slamming against the sidewalk. Everything was slick, reflecting light and color like a greasy oil painting.

We sat on the steps of what I’d correctly assumed to be an abandoned factory, and the cool stone pressed through my jeans. Thankfully, the recessed entryway was doing its part to shield us from the elements. I couldn’t have dealt with the bitter wind, otherwise.

No one seemed to be out and about—not that they’d have any reason to. The street looked to be part of a dated industrial district with no active tenants. There wasn’t a soul to be seen in either direction.

“Are you cold?” The rich timbre of Wallace’s voice did little to soothe my nerves.

I turned to regard him with all the icy stoicism I could muster. This was not the time for small talk.

He stared at me for a moment, his eyes wandering over my body in slow assessment. Without a word, he shrugged out of his hoodie and folded it over his arm. The gesture, simple as it was, hurt me in a way I couldn’t describe. How could he still act like that, when he’d…he’d… I shivered again.
Damn it.
I took the heavy sweatshirt and draped it around my shoulders. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it.”

Rain continued to pound the sidewalk, creating static in our silence.

“I never wanted you to be involved,” he said.

“Gee, thanks.” I pressed my lips together, trying to keep my expression neutral. So I’d been right the first time. He didn’t trust me. “Well, you know what? That’s fine.” My heart clenched. “As far as I’m concerned, we can just pretend none of this ever happened and go our separate ways.”

Ah, hell.
He was giving me that hurt look again, like I was driving a blade into his chest. “What?”

“Is that what you really want?”

Ugh.
“Yes. No. I don’t know!”

“Rena.” He angled his back to the wall so he could face me. “Don’t misunderstand me. I didn’t want you to get involved, because of the danger. Look at what happened to you tonight.”

“So, why didn’t you just agree to help him to begin with?” I asked, pulling his sweatshirt across my chest. “You could’ve spared us both a lot of grief.”

Wallace shook his head and let out a sigh. “I thought he was lying.”

“Who lies about their grandmother?”

He stiffened. “You heard that?”

“Yeah.”

A car alarm went off somewhere down the block. “Let’s just say there’s more to this situation than you understand.”

“Apparently, there’s more to a lot of things,” I mumbled, kicking at a bottle cap. “Were you going to tell me about the drunk driver?”

Wallace winced. “I…didn’t know how to bring it up.”

“So, you just kept it to yourself? I shared something private with you, Wallace. I did it because I felt…well, I felt like I could confide in you. Obviously you didn’t feel the same way about me.” I frowned. “Did you tell Rachel?”
Oh shit.
I hadn’t meant for that last part to slip out.

“Rachel?” he asked, incredulous. “What does she have to do with anything?”

“She…you…well, you’re together, aren’t you?”
Smooth, Rena. Really smooth.

“What? What gave you that idea?” A thousand emotions raced past, reflecting in his eyes. “You thought we were…?”

“Well, hell, I didn’t know. You guys seemed so close, and she’s always sitting with you in the dining hall.” I crossed my arms, feeling more and more self-conscious. “I just figured—”

“We’re not together,” he said in a firm tone. “She doesn’t know anything more than you did a few days ago. In fact, she probably doesn’t even know that much.”

“Oh.” The wind howled, grounding me in reality when I wanted, so badly, to retreat into the depths of my mind.

“I do want to confide in you.” His strained voice broke me free of my musings. “But, you’ve got to understand I just…can’t.”

I shot him a hard look. The cryptic excuses were getting old. “If you wanted to tell me, you would. That’s all there is to it.”

Even though he’d confessed to it, I couldn’t bring myself to think of Wallace as some cold-blooded killer. Sure, I found myself a little nervous—maybe even fearful—earlier, but a few words from him and it all went away. I knew I was being stupid, but I wanted to feel safe around him again—even if it was a temporary delusion.

“I guess you’re right. I don’t want to tell you,” he conceded, pausing for a moment. “If you hadn’t gotten invol—”

“Ugh. Would you just shut up about that already?” I dug the heels of my palms into my temples. “Seriously, I get it. It was a mistake to interfere, and I already paid for it. That’s done. Do you understand what I’m saying? I’m already in this, Wallace. It’s too late to worry about that now.”

He stared at me for a moment, and I squirmed under the weight of his gaze. “What?” I snapped, frustrated by the sudden lull.

“I don’t understand how you’re dealing with all of this.”

I blinked. “Well, I…”
Geez.
When would he stop catching me off guard? “I don’t really have a choice, do I?”

He looked down and blew out a sigh. “You know that if I tell you, it’s going to change things, right?”

“Yeah.” Of course I knew. I’d known for a while now. How I knew, well, that was another story. That one still left me in the dark.

“Before I go on, I have to say”—he met my gaze and gave a heartbreaking smile, resigned and bittersweet—“I really enjoyed our time together.”

My nerves twitched.

“What does that mean?” I felt dizzy as I reached out and grabbed his arm. “What are you going to do?”
Was this what he meant by dealing with me?

He didn’t flinch at the contact, and I forced myself to hold on. His skin was warm and hard to the touch, taut with layers of muscle. For a moment, I felt stable, like I could brace myself for whatever was coming.

“Nothing,” he finally answered. “What I meant was, you might not feel comfortable around me after this, so I just wanted to—I don’t know—thank you.”

“Don’t say stuff like that.” I tightened my grip, swallowing the last of my nerves. “Just tell me.”

Chapter Twenty-Three

“I don’t know where to start. I don’t even know what Cole told you,” Wallace muttered, blowing out another sigh.

I let my hand fall back, limp at my side. “He didn’t say much. I think he was trying to scare me.”

“Doesn’t surprise me. He’s always been like that.” He turned and hunched forward, leaning over his knees to draw a slow breath. “It was a Wednesday night. I think we were eight at the time, spending the night with our grandparents.”

He wasn’t looking at me, but I could practically feel the latent emotion stirring inside him. Already, it was starting to poison my veins with apprehension.

“Mom was a teacher at the middle school, and they were having some kind of parents’ night. My dad went along to set up.” He paused, pressing his lips together as he swallowed. “They were on their way home when this drunk driver, Roman West, went left of center and hit them head-on. They died at the scene. I-I remember the phone rang, and Grandma started crying. I’d never seen her cry before.”

I didn’t know what to do. Comforting was never my strong suit. Should I say something?

“It’s a little blurry after that. Lots of people came to the house, and we didn’t go to school for the rest of the week. There were services and dinners and…” He trailed off. “Eventually, West was found guilty of two counts of…uh, something like vehicular manslaughter. There were a few other charges, too. Drunk driving, reckless driving, I don’t even know.”

He ducked his head down, running his fingers through the uneven tufts of hair. “He was sentenced to up to ten years in prison but got out after seven on parole. It’s like lives don’t even matter anymore. You kill two people and do less time than if you’d stolen something.”

I reached out and gingerly rubbed his shoulder. I could only guess how hard it’d been on them, especially at such an impressionable age.

“People talked. In our town, people talked…
a lot
,” he explained. “Word got around that he was working the third shift at the foundry. Someone said he was drinking again.” A muscle ticked in his jaw. “Cole and I took it too personally. We were upset and wanted to…no, we
needed
to talk to him.”

I swallowed hard and forced myself to nod. I knew what was coming.

“We told Grandma goodnight and went to bed like nothing was wrong.” He shook his head. “We thought we were so slick then, acting like it was some kind of mission. Now, when I look back on it, I think we just needed that closure. It was always going to be left undone, until we confronted him, ya know? The monster in our nightmares.”

His voice lowered as he continued, “Half an hour before his shift was supposed to end, we slipped out through the basement window, taking the back way on foot.”

Maybe I was wrong. Maybe I wasn’t ready to hear this.

“We took cover behind a dumpster in the lot across the street from the foundry. It didn’t take long. He showed up in the parking lot around six, walking some guy to his car. For a minute there, I didn’t think we were going to be able to go through with it. It wasn’t like we could face him in front of someone.”

“Good point,” I muttered in a half-assed attempt at encouragement. I wanted to throw up.