Stuck with a Spell (10 page)

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Authors: D. D. Scott

Tags: #witches, #humorous fiction, #humor and comedy, #voodoo dolls, #spellcasting, #dd scott, #david slegg, #stuck with a series, #halloween comedy

BOOK: Stuck with a Spell
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I really hope you’ve enjoyed your time
with Nicky, Sam and the rest of the Stuck with a Spell crew. D.D.
and I had a lot of fun coming up with the story, and we hope you
had fun reading it.

I grew up on a cattle farm
on the banks of the Wabash River and studied Ag Economics at
Purdue. I’ve been just about everything under the sun. When I say
everything, I mean everything. I’ve been a waiter, a research
technician, a bouncer, a salesman, a mapmaker, a bookseller, an
ultramarathon runner, an AutoCAD drafter, and an
editor
. Oh, before I
forget, I should also mention I recently earned my MLIS (Master of
Library and Information Science) from Simmons College in Boston
while living there for the past several years.

Friends have been telling me for years
that I should write a book. These urgings were not for the reasons
you might expect. Let’s just say I’ve had an unusually high number
of improbably unlucky experiences. We’re talking about the sorts of
things that you’d find humorous if they were happening to a
character in a novel but not so funny if they were happening to
you. I intend to inflict some of these situations on my characters.
Hell, it might even be therapeutic.

 

How vain it is to sit down to write if
you have not stood up to live.

~Henry David Thoreau

 

There have been many variations of the
sentiment behind the Thoreau quote above. Several successful
writers have said something to the effect that you should go out
and experience life before you begin to write. If that’s true, I’ve
got the “go out and live” half of the equation covered in
spades.

Speaking of living, I recently moved
back to the family farm. I’m actually writing this note to you in
my father’s old office sitting at his antique rolltop desk. When
I’m not writing, you can find me doing the daily tasks that come
with running a cattle farm. They include everything from mending
fence to birthing calves. I also take time to run, hike, and read
when I can.

You’ll find both the noise
of the city and the sounds of the country in my stories. There’s
also a strong possibility that you’ll meet a librarian or two along
the way. I’m really excited to be launching my career co-writing
with Amazon and B&N Top 100 Bestselling Romantic Comedy and
Humorous Mystery Author,
D. D. Scott
. It’s a real
joy to have such a great co-author who’s full of great idea’s.
We’re looking forward to more adventures in the STUCK WITH A
Series.

You can hook up with me at:

@
DavidSlegg
on
Twitter

And on
Facebook
.

I think we’re going to have a good
time. Come and laugh with me.

The Best of Ereading Wishes

David
Slegg

 

 

 

 

STUCK WITH
SLEIGH BELLS

(A Stuck with a Series -
Christmas Novella)

CHAPTER ONE

 


R
ing a ding ding, Y’All!”

And no, I ain’t ringin’ the bell at a
Salvation Army pot. Although, I do take part in that each holiday
season.

Not today, folks. Not today.

I’m jinglin’ these damn sleigh bells as
fast as my scrawny arms can shake ‘em because word has it that
doing so could have some major ramifications this time of
year.

First of all, it damn sure beats
swallowing rocks. Would you believe that’s what those stupid ass
neanderthal cave men used to do? Before they figured out how to
make bells, they swallowed rocks so their distended bellies would
jingle when they were ready to mate. How romantic,
right?

So, anyhoo...back to my bells. Oh, but
first, I’d better tell ya a bit about me.

I’m Lucy Weiss, retired from running my
award-winning Meat n’ Three Diner in Nashville Tennessee. Yep,
right there in Music City sits my diner, Lucy’s LunchBox Cafe.
Every day, we serve up the Holy Trinity of White Vegetables - mac
and cheese, white beans and mashed taters - plus the meat of your
choice, barbecued, of course. Thus, we’re a Meat ‘n Three Diner. I
never could understand why people can’t figure that out. But
anyway, I’m Lucy. Although, my friends and family just call me
Grams.

I guess I’m also a bit of what kids
nowadays call a Quant. Fancy name for one helluva computer genius -
aka hacker. I can totally rock ‘n’ roll across any keyboard. And I
can do things you ain’t never seen with a mouse.

Now then...about these
bells...

I have it on good authority that
ringing these sleigh bells with gusto can not only ward off bad
luck and evil spirits, and trust me, in this family, that’s
important stuff, but also, these bells can attract
meteorites!

Now, how cool would it be to see Santa
Claus comin’ to town ridin’ the big ass tail of a
meteorite?!

Okay. Just kidding...sort of. That’s
not the reason I’m ringin’ bells. But, for the record, I do think
Santa arriving by meteorite would be totally awesome
sauce.

I’ve also been told by one of my
sources that if I’m the first sleigh bell dingler of the season,
I’ll herald the arrival of Dietger, the Gaily-Clad King of Winter
and his Splendiferous Ice Court. Now, mind you, I’m a huge fan of
Ice Capades, but I’m thinkin’ this might even top that.

That brings me to exactly why I’m
putting everything I’ve got into shakin’ these bells.

I’ve got my own King of Winter. That
would be my significant other, Father Time, who I hooked up with
last year during one helluva hullabaloo mixed in with the season’s
holly too. But my Babycakes Father Time has some issues.

Luckily though, I’ve now got him
trained better than Pavlov’s dogs. So, in a manner of speaking,
he’ll be saved by the bell. Well, that or he’ll be salivating like
hell.

Yep, here he comes now...

Poor guy, looks like he’s in a drunk
and dazed stupor.

 

To Be Continued...

 

We hope you enjoyed this Sneak Peek at
STUCK WITH SLEIGH BELLS, which is coming this holiday season! For
all of you Grams fans...this is her story. What a hoot of a holiday
it will be with her in charge!

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