Bad hormones. “Easy for you to say. You didn’t
have a stampede outside your window.” Not to mention the all-day attempt to fix the ice machine. The spray of gravel as the pickup trucks and animal trailers moved out.
I pushed to my feet and walked over to peek around the blinds. Sure enough, there wasn’t a calf in sight.
Back to normal.
Elmer’s voice echoed in my head and I realized that the rodeo must have opened their temporary holding pens for the animals.
The last few rays of sun sizzled across one of my fingertips. A wisp of black smoke spiraled up into the air and pain bolted through me. I snatched my hand away. Normal. Sure.
“What are you talking about?” Ty’s voice drew me away from the window.
“Nothing.” I sank back down on the bed. “It’s my neighbors,” I heard myself say. “They must have been having a party.”
“Funny, but I thought you were the one having the party.”
“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about.” That’s what I said. Meanwhile my brain scrambled for a very lengthy and painful death for my not-so-fave brother.
“You’re the only one. You could hear the music down the block. Rob is one hell of a host.”
Uh-oh.
“He and Nina broke up, so he’s at my house mourning the loss.”
“Sugar, he didn’t mourn the entire time I was there.
He danced a lot. And fell on his ass a few times. And annihilated a few of your lamps. And I even saw him stand on your coffee table and do several AB+ shots. But that was it. No crying. No depression. Nothing.” He grew silent for a long moment while his news sent me into a complete mental freak-out.
My coffee table?
My lamps?
Oh, no, he didn’t.
“Why don’t you tell me what’s really going on,” Ty finally said.
“I think they’re both just really stubborn,” I blurted before I lost it and launched into a description of exactly how big an ungrateful, inconsiderate, clueless asshole my brother really was. “She loves him even if he is an ungrateful, inconsiderate, clueless asshole.” What? I can’t vent? “But she doesn’t realize it and he loves her but he doesn’t realize it, and neither one of them will say it.”
Not unlike someone else I know,
I added silently.
“I’m not talking about Nina and Rob. What’s going on with you? Where are you?”
My stomach tied itself into several knots and guilt crept through me. “Didn’t you, um, get my message? I’m in Arizona.”
“See, that’s the funny thing.
I’m
in Arizona and you’re nowhere around.”
I contemplated the possibility all of five seconds. “You’re not in Arizona,” I finally told him.
“And neither are you. You lied to me.”
“I did not. I mean, technically, you might call it a lie but I’m supposed to be escaping from the world. This retreat is really important to me. I want to get the full experience, so I figured it was better if I kept my actual whereabouts a secret. That way I won’t have any distractions.”
“This doesn’t have to do with Esther, does it?”
“Esther who?”
“I’m serious, Lil. You need to stay out of it. Merlin and his men already have the situation under control.”
“By
under control
you mean he’s sitting around on his ass, waiting for the ax to drop, while Esther suffers.”
“The ritual doesn’t call for an ax. It’s a knife. An ancient Mayan dagger used to sacrifice victims to the gods.”
My stomach pitched. “What ever. The point is, nobody cares what happens to her.”
“They’ve got rules to follow. That’s the way it works.”
“That stinks.”
“Lil—”
“I mean, it
would
stink if I weren’t a self-centered, narcissistic vampire who didn’t give a shit about anyone or anything except my fantabulous self. But I am, so it’s all good. I could care less and there’s no way in the world I would take matters into my own
hands,” I rushed on, “and look for Esther on my own. Not this vamp.”
“Merlin and his men will destroy anyone who tries to stop Mordred from making the sacrifice. They want to put him away for good and this is the only way to do it.”
“Which is exactly why I’m staying far, far away from Texas and minding my own self-centered business.”
“Yeah.”
“Really. Geez, would you look at the time? I’m late for
Dieting Tips to Slim Down Your Overweight Clients.
Can’t miss that. Gotta run.” I killed the connection before he could ask me any more questions.
And
before he could add anything like
Please be careful
or
I miss you
or
I love you.
If he’d wanted to, that is.
No sooner did I switch my phone to vibrate than the dial-up on the nightstand started to ring. I had to hand it to Ty. He was fast and per sis tent.
A tiny thrill went through me and I barely resisted the urge to snatch up the phone. Come on. It’s not like he was calling to declare his devotion. He was going to chew me a new one.
I knew that and so I was
not
picking up the phone.
Then again, it might not even be Ty. It might be someone with a tip about Mordred. I’d handed out cards to dozens of people. Maybe it was finally paying off.
I snatched up the receiver. “Lil Marchette.”
“Meatloaf sandwiches and fried pickles,” Elmer said. “Just delivered. You in?”
“Pass.”
“Best meatloaf in town,” he added.
According to the
Lonely Fork Gazette,
no doubt.
“I’m not really hungry.”
“City folk,” he murmured. “It just ain’t natural living on carrot sticks and whole wheat and all them fancy schmancy protein shakes and such. Gimme real food any day.”
And gimme a friggin’ break.
“Just so’s you know,” he went on, “the lobby will be closed tonight. I’m playing Bingo over at the VFW.”
My worry faded in a rush of excitement. “You have a date?”
“Does Tallulah Pierce count?”
“That depends on the circumstances. Did you ask her out?”
“Not exactly. I have to pick her up on account of I’m the only one at the VFW who’ll let her sight dog ride in the front cab of their pickup. He’s old and a little incontinent.”
“Aren’t we all?”
“That’s what I always say. Anyhow, I give her a ride every week to Bingo, so I guess you might consider it a date.”
“Do you kiss her good night?”
“I shake her hand and sometimes I scrape poop off her shoe if she steps the wrong way before the dog can stop her.”
“That doesn’t really qualify her as a love interest.”
“Then I guess I’m flying solo.”
Not for long. I slid the phone into its cradle and reached for my cell. I entered my password and checked my voice mail. Tonight was the night. I was going to get a break in Esther’s case. A witness who’d seen someone fitting Mordred’s description. A concerned neighbor who smelled rotting vampire. An innocent bystander who’d heard screams or crying or something.
I held tight to the hope as the first message echoed in my ear.
“I’m at Pollo Loco,” Mandy said. “Where are you?” I ignored a spiral of guilt and hit
DELETE.
Message two. “I’m at Crazy Jimmy’s,” my mother said. “Where are you?”
Delete.
Message three. “I’m still at Pollo Loco. I’m giving you fifteen more minutes. In the meantime, I think I’ll have the nachos.”
Message four. “I’m still at Crazy Jimmy’s and I’m drinking Bloody Marias all by myself. I’ve tried calling Mandy, but she must be on the phone because it’s going straight to voice mail.”
Delete.
Message five. “I know you’re up to something—” Ty started. I hit
DELETE
before he could finish.
Message six. “You’re getting in way over your head—”
Delete.
Message seven. “Stay out of it—”
Delete.
The end.
So much for helpful tips.
I punched in the number for Golden Acres and asked for Tara.
“Sure, she’s here. But she can’t come to the phone. She’s playing Bridge and she gets real mad when anyone interrupts her. I can have her call you when she’s finished.”
I’d already gone that route yesterday. “Why don’t you just give me directions instead?”
I was through waiting around for a return phone call. I would fly up to Austin and talk to Tara in person.
Not that I had any illusions that it was going to bring me any closer to finding Esther, but I had to
do
something. The waiting for someone to call with a tip and the worry over Esther was driving me nuts.
I walked into the bathroom, peeled off Ty’s T-shirt and climbed into a hot shower. I was just rinsing shampoo out of my hair and envisioning a massive break in Esther’s case (finding Mordred playing Bridge with Tara while Esther crouched in a nearby closet) when I heard the rattle of the dead bolt and the twist of the doorknob.
What the—
The thought struck just as a hand gripped the shower curtain and ripped it to the side. A scream burst past my lips as I whirled. Shampoo ran in my eyes, but I forced them open anyway, to see Nina One standing on the bathmat.
Her blond hair was pulled back in a ponytail and she had no makeup on. She wore a rumpled Juicy sweat suit and flip-flops (we’re talking the plain, plastic kind). I knew right then that something bad had happened.
“What’s wrong?”
She started to say something, but when her mouth opened, all that came out was a high-pitched squeak.
“Is it that bad?”
More squeaking and a fierce nod.
“Is it your father? Your mother?”
She shook her head.
“Nina Two?” Panic bolted through me. “Did she get hurt?”
She shook her head. I was definitely biting at the wrong artery, so I decided to switch victims.
“Your dad took away your credit cards?”
Another shake.
“Your credit cards got stolen?”
Another frantic shake.
“They’re closing Barneys?”
She shook her head and relief pumped through me for a split second. But then Nina squeaked again and I was back to Guess That Tragedy.
“Your favorite Prada bag bit the dust?” When she
did a frantic side to side, I added, “Come on, Nina. You gotta give me something.”
She nodded and seemed to fight for her control. She cleared her throat. Her trembling lips parted and she said in a tense, strained voice the very last thing I ever expected to hear.
“I—I’m pregnant.”
“Y
ou’re
what?”
I braced a hand against the tiled wall as my knees went suddenly weak.
She licked her lips. “I’m pregnant.”
“Pregnant?”
“Pregnant.”
“Pregnant?”
“Pregnant.”
She held up a hand when I opened my mouth. “If you keep saying it, I’m going to heave.”
“But I don’t understand.”
“Pregnant,” she repeated, “as in PG. Preggo. Stuffed full of tiny vamp spawn.”
“I understand what it means.” I grabbed a nearby towel and wiped at my burning eyes. “I just don’t understand …” I shook my head. “How?”
“He kissed my neck and then I nibbled the skin
over his pulse beat and that made him go nuts. The next thing I knew, I was flat on my back and he was—”
“I don’t mean how as in a detailed play-by-play,” I cut in, wrapping the towel around me and stuffing the edge under my arm. “I mean
how
as in how could you let this happen? Haven’t you ever heard of a condom?”
“Are you kidding? I practically own stock in Trojan. They’re great for the occasional human encounter or when I pick up a made vampire. They even worked like a charm when I did that werewolf back in ’77. You remember him. The one who taught me how to do the hustle that time at Studio 54.”
I shook my head. Anything that involved polyester and a Dorothy Hamill bob I’d much rather forget.
“But condoms are powerless against born vamp sperm,” Nina went on. “Those suckers just bit right through it.” She shook her head. “I am so screwed.”
Born vamp. Pregnant.
The facts echoed in my head and reality struck. “Rob’s the father?”
“Nah, it’s Brad Pitt. He snuck away and left Angie with the kiddos while we did it on top of the Empire State Building. Of course it’s Rob’s. That’s why I’m so freaked.”
“Because you don’t love him and the thought of being saddled with his spawn is too much to handle, or because you do love him and you’re afraid if you
go crawling back now he’ll think it’s just because of the baby?”
“How did you know?”
“I’m a professional, Nina. Understanding vamp nature is what I do for a living.”
“I thought you were a matchmaker.”
“I am, but in order to be successful at my job I have to understand the nuts and bolts of the vampire psyche.”
“Now I am going to heave.” She turned and walked into the bedroom and I followed. “What am I going to do?”
“First you’re going to tell me whether or not you love him.” Because while I’d obviously hit it on the head, I’d been whacking both sides so I had no clue which nail we were talking about. “You do love him, right?”
“I didn’t think so. In fact, I was pretty sure I didn’t. But then I’m in the bathroom the night before last and I’m feeling really sick. I’m thinking maybe Ernesto had the flu or something and I just had some really bad Mexican. But then I woke up yesterday and I was still feeling sick. I called Nina Two and she told me to take a pregnancy test. I thought she was crazy, but the more I thought about it…” She sniffled again. “I figured I’d take one and put my mind at ease.” Her gaze collided with mine. “I took five of them and by the time that fifth plus sign appeared, I knew it was true.”