Summer's Edge (21 page)

"So much freedom!" Jules said. "Literally no one telling me what to do any more."

"Except for your parents."

"They’ll ease off assuming I get all my A-levels."

"The results don’t come out until August," Becky said.

Alice wondered what the wait was going to be like. Once the euphoria of finishing the last exam and leaving school had died down, would it hang over their summer like a dark, oppressive cloud? They would have to find some way to forget about it. Focusing on a really solid Plan B might help.
 

But she didn’t really want to do anything except veterinary science. Plan B was repeating her exams and having a second shot, though that also mean saying farewell to her travel plans. And to visiting Australia.

* * *

Back home Alice braced herself for the worst. Her mother, as she had anticipated, was more worried than angry. And more angry with him than with Alice.

"What kind of a man can he be, Alice, to go after a girl your age?"

Alice tried to explain that Stewart was the one who had held off while she had pursued him, but her mother was unconvinced.

"He still had a choice. Divorced as well. Why can’t you find a nice boy your own age?"

The fact was that Alice hadn’t really been looking for anyone. What with A-levels and her summer plans, it was the worst time to meet anyone, least of all seriously. She tried to explain this to her mother.

"This just happened, and I didn’t know I was going to feel this way. But it doesn’t change anything. I’m not about to emigrate like Becky is," Alice said.

Her mother was not convinced. "Richard thinks we should meet him and I agree. You may be eighteen and free to do what you like, but while you live here we would like to be aware of who your friends are. We’ll have him over for dinner next week."

Alice really did not want this. She imagined it could only be hideously awkward but she didn’t have much choice.

"I’ll see if he’s free."

"I just hope this hasn’t affected your exams," her mother continued. "You know how important this term is. You’re far too young to be dating this man, especially at a time like this."

It was no point arguing the last point. "My exams are going fine, honestly," Alice said. "We revised exactly the right material for Biology and all the questions I was hoping for came up. And Chemistry was fine too."

Her mother looked at her. Her face showed her usual love but also concern. It made Alice feel guilty as she hated worrying her mother.

"I just don’t want you to be unhappy, darling. Something like this can’t end well."

"Why not?" Alice asked.

But her mother wouldn’t give a reason. "Let’s meet him first and we’ll talk about it later."

He rang her later that evening and fortunately Alice was the one who picked up the phone. It was in the hall which gave her some privacy.
 

"How are you? I wanted to see you earlier but I was worried it would get you into more trouble. What did the Head decide?" he asked.

She loved hearing his voice. His accent, his tone. After one of the worst days of her life she no longer felt alone. "I’m not expelled. Nearly, but Richard - my stepdad - saved the day. I’m completely forbidden from any contact with you though. At least until after Thursday."

He laughed. "I think I can possibly wait that long."

"What about you? They didn’t fire you?"

"No. A rap on the knuckles, though I offered to resign."

Alice asked if Mr Francis had told him who had seen them.

"He just said 'one of the staff'."

Exactly as Alice had thought. It would have been all round school if it had been another pupil, though probably would be by Thursday anyway. These things always got out. She wasn’t sure how she felt about everyone knowing, but so close to the end of term maybe it didn’t really matter.

"I’m sorry I couldn’t be there for you," he said.

She told him it was fine. She was just happy that he had wanted to be there though she didn’t tell him. "Another thing, my parents want you to come over for dinner next week." It was a statement not an invitation as she was anxious he would refuse.

"Which day?"

Alice felt hugely relieved. She wasn’t sure how she had been expecting him to respond but he sounded as though he didn’t even see it as a problem. But she thought she should better warn him. "They want to check you out."

"Of course they do. I’m thankful it’s dinner and not a shotgun."

Once again she was relieved and impressed by how he just took things in his stride. Nothing seemed to faze him. "So do all the other staff know?" she asked him.

"Not that I know of. I’m sure word will get around," he said.

She felt bad. "I’m sorry." After all, she got to escape in a few days. He still had to face everyone.

"It’s not your fault. And in case you’re worried, I don’t regret a thing."

Something in his voice thrilled her but also scared her a little. It was the enormity of it all, what she had brought them both to. She wished she could be with him now so he could put his arms around her and make everything ok. She wanted to close her eyes and shut out the rest of the world. How she longed for this week to be over.

The first Economics exam on Tuesday went reasonably well. So Alice was surprised when Jules wasn’t in school on Wednesday. It was their last Economics revision class before the final exam so where on earth was she?

No one at school seemed to know, and as Alice was trying to keep a low profile herself she didn’t like to ask any of the teachers.

So she went round to Jules’ house after school to discover Jules a tear-stained lump of misery in her bedroom, with all the curtains closed.

"What’s wrong? You weren’t on the sick register."

"I’m not sick, I’m broken," Jules said.

It was Leafy. Unbeknownst to Jules he had also been seeing another girl and had been quite blithe about it when Jules found out. "Apparently he thought I would have known. Free love or some such bullshit like that."

Alice, who had been fearing that Jules had got pregnant or something worse, was privately slightly relieved.

"Maybe that’s just what all those people do," she said.

"Her name was Petal, can you believe it? Not Petal like a nickname or something, I mean her parents actually christened her that. Petal. What a stupid name." Jules was working her way through a large box of tissues that were crumpled all over her bed.

"Is she a crusty?" Alice asked.

"No, even worse, she looks totally normal. I met her once, before I knew he was screwing her. She’s all petite and perfect with glossy dark hair. She looks like that girl off The Wonder Years." Jules herself was tall and her reddish brown hair defied most styling. Alice thought she had beautiful hair, it was so thick and wavy, but Jules had always wished it was straight and sleek.

"She lives on a canal boat, for god’s sake," Jules continued. "In Tewkesbury. And she has a kid."

It was unclear from her tone which of these things offended her the most.

"It’s not his though? The kid?"

"God no. Not unless one of his ancestors is a Rasta or something."

At least this meant any of Jules’ plans of joining the alternative community and ditching her degree were hopefully over as well.

"You could still do something environmental, you know. Maybe specialise in environmental law?" Alice said.

"Sod that. Working pro bono for a logging company is more like it."

Alice went to open the curtains. "It’s a really nice afternoon. Come out for a walk."

Jules vowed she was never going out in daylight again.

"You can become a recluse after tomorrow. Just one more exam. Let’s go to the garage for some chocolate and then we can go through the notes from today’s class."
 

There was a petrol station two streets from where Jules lived. Open 24/7 it was a popular snack stop after a night out. Reluctantly Jules dragged herself up. "I look like hell. I haven’t got any make up on."

"Just wear sunglasses."

Jules obeyed which was rare for her. She truly was broken down, Alice thought.

Outside the weather was flawless. Surely this would lift Jules’ spirits.

"I never asked about how you were going," Jules said. "Anything more happen regarding your lover boy?"

It had been a huge relief to Alice that even if all the staff knew none of the pupils had managed to find out. She was pretty sure she had detected certain glances and looks of disapproval from various teachers though it could have been her paranoia imagining it. But if it had got round the school she would have had grief from Maddy and other. Happily they had said nothing.

"You got very lucky then. Though I suppose it doesn’t really matter now," Jules said.

"Still embarrassing with all the staff knowing, if they do. I always thought it would be cool if they found out but somehow it all makes me feel like That Girl."

"Most are probably jealous," Jules said. "He’s the best looking staff member at Fairmount in years. Possibly ever. Pretty galling that he’s seeing a sixth former rather than one of them."

They crossed the road to the service station. Mid-afternoon, in the early summer heat, everything seemed hazy and quiet. There weren’t any cars there filling up.

"That’s what I thought it would be like. But it’s not, it’s as though they think less of me," Alice said.

"I shouldn’t worry about it. I bet most of them don’t even know. Francis and the Padlock would want to keep it hush if they didn’t actually expel you."

* * *

Much chocolate and revising later, Alice returned home. She was feeling fairly relaxed about the final exam tomorrow. And also excited. It was a bit like Christmas Eve: waiting for the very last day of school.

One more exam, and then… nothing. Some of the other Economics students were planning to go to a nearby restaurant with a licensed bar for lunch and start the pub crawl early. Alice had other plans.

At least Jules was in a better mood by the time Alice had left. With luck the loss of Leafy wouldn’t drag down her entire summer.

Her mother was making supper when Alice entered the kitchen. "Did you find Jules?" she asked. "Was she ill?" Alice had stopped home briefly to change out of her school uniform before heading to Jules’ place.

"Yes, and no. Sort of. She had a heartbreak thing going on," Alice said. "But she’ll be fine for tomorrow. You know Jules." Jules was resilient.

Her mother sighed. "You girls. Why can’t you all just finish your exams and leave the complications for later? You have all the time in the world."

But it just didn’t work like that. Things happened when they happened. Neither Jules, Alice nor Becky would never have planned to fall headlong in love in the middle of their A-levels if they had any control over things.

Alice remembered someone once telling her that you always met someone the night before you went on holiday. Or at a leaving party. Either because it was Fate throwing a spanner in the works or because you gave off a special unavailable vibe that made you irresistible. In actual fact Alice didn’t think it was either of these things. It was simply bad timing.

"It all just happened," she said. Not without a twinge of guilt since she knew she had actively pursued Stewart.

There were a lot of what ifs. What if he hadn’t kissed her in the pavilion that first time, might she have given up? What if he hadn’t been at the barbecue? What if he’d never come to the rave at Selsley? Actually the more she thought about it, it was as much him as it was her.

This wasn’t something she planned to tell her mother though. "Is Richard back?" she asked.

"He’s in his study."

Alice still felt she owed Richard hugely for his role with Mr Francis and Mrs Paddington that week. She wasn’t really sure how to repay him. But that currently mattered less to her than his good opinion. It wasn’t something she had thought about before but now she was worried he thought less of her.

Richard looked up from some papers as she hovered at the door. "Ready for the final day?" he asked.

She took this as an invitation to come in and sit down. "We’ve revised everything possible. I just have to try not to forget it overnight."

"I’m sure you’ll do admirably. Your mother and I are both very proud of how well you have always done at school. Whatever your results come August, you have a bright future in front of you."

This meant a lot coming from Richard. Her mother was modest about his virtues but Alice had come to realise over the years that he was very highly respected in his field and possibly even brilliant. This was despite never knowing exactly what he did. The research he carried out in his study was for his private interest since he couldn’t bring his actual work home.

She wasn’t really sure what to say except to thank him.

"I always wanted a daughter," he told her. "I realise I can’t take the place of your own father but I feel very blessed to have you as well as the boys."

Alice was unexpectedly moved. He had always just been Richard to her, an uncle-like figure whom she was very fond of. She had barely seen him as a stepfather let alone a father.

"I never knew my father so there isn’t really a place to take," she said. "My mother and then you are all I’ve really known." She hoped this conveyed what she wanted it to.

He smiled, so hopefully it had.

"If you are ever in trouble I hope you will feel able to let me know. Should you run into financial difficulties on your trip, for example."

Alice could see that there was something that he didn’t feel quite able to say but she guessed what it was. He didn’t want her feeling that she had to rely on Stewart or anyone else, that he and her mother were still there for her.

"I will, I promise." She suddenly felt incredibly lucky. There were so many choices and options in front of her but they were good choices. She was safe.

"School’s out!"

Jules and Alice were finally done. Becky had finished a couple of days earlier, but she was meeting them at the school gates to celebrate along with the rest of those who had just finished Economics. They were off to the nearby restaurant and happy hour lunchtime cocktails.