Sunset in St. Tropez (12 page)

“Have you seen the boat?” Eric asked hopefully, as John poured them all wine.

“I have,” Pascale confessed. “It dates back to Robinson Crusoe. I hope you can still sail it.”

“I"m sure we'll be able to get her going.” He glanced at his wife then with a smile, and Diana said nothing.

Pascale cooked dinner for them that night. Agathe had already set the dining room table, and she offered to serve, but Pascale said she could manage without her. And afterward, when she and Diana were clearing the dishes, and John and Eric were smoking cigars in the garden, Pascale couldn't help looking at her and asking her a question. She was worried about her.

“Are you all right? You"ve seemed upset to me for a while, and in New York, I kept thinking you were just tired.

Are you okay, Diana?”

There was a long pause as her friend looked at her, started to nod, and then shook her head emphatically. She sat down at the ancient kitchen table, as tears began rolling slowly down her cheeks, and she looked up at Pascale, heartbroken, and no longer able or willing to conceal her sorrow from her friend.

“What's wrong? … oh poor thing … What happened?” Pascale put an arm around her as she asked her, and Diana wiped her eyes with her apron.

She couldn't even bring herself to say the words. She leaned against Pascale for a minute, as Pascale held her like a child, and wondered what had happened to so desperately upset her. She had never seen Diana like that.

“Are you sick?” Diana shook her head, but continued to say nothing. All she could do was blow her nose in the paper towel Pascale had just handed her. “It's not you and Eric, is it?” Pascale meant the question to be rhetorical, but as soon as she saw Diana's face, Pascale knew it was. Diana sat and stared at her for a long moment, and then finally nodded. “It isn't! How can that be?”

“I don't know how it can be. I"ve been asking him the same question for the last month.”

“What happened?” Pascale looked stunned, and Diana looked devastated.

“He's been having an affair with one of his patients,” she said, and blew her nose again. In a way, it was a relief to tell Pascale. She hadn't told a soul since he had admitted it to her. It was her solitary ugly secret.

“Are you sure you"re not imagining it? I just can't believe that.” “Well, it's true. He told me. I knew something was wrong for about two months, but I didn't know what, and four weeks ago, he admitted it to me. Katherine's baby got croup and had to go to the hospital in the middle of the night, so I called Eric to ask him to meet them in the emergency room, and they told me he hadn't been there all night. He had told me he was doing a delivery. He even called me and told me he'd be stuck there until morning and would go straight to the office afterward. All of a sudden, I realized that most of the time he's been telling me he was at the hospital at night, he wasn't.”

“Eric?” Pascale's voice cracked as she said it. To Pascale, he had always seemed like the perfect husband.

Easygoing, good-humored, considerate, kind to his wife, the ideal husband and father. “Is he in love with her?”

“He says he's not sure. He said he stopped seeing her a few days ago, and maybe he did, she's been calling him at home every night. I think he's very upset about it. He says she's a nice woman. She was one of his patients, and her husband deserted her right after she had her baby. He felt sorry for her. And she must be very pretty, she's a model.”

“How old is she?” Pascale asked, looking agonized for her. It was every woman's worst nightmare. Diana looked ravaged by what she'd told Pascale.

“She's thirty,” Diana said, looking heartbroken. “I"m old enough to be her mother. She's the same age as Katherine.

I feel about six hundred years old. He'd probably be better off with her.” And then she looked up at Pascale with stricken eyes, “I don't think I'll ever trust him again. I"m not even sure I can stay married to him now.”

“You can't do that,” Pascale said, looking horrified. “You can't divorce him. Not after all this time. That would be just terrible. If he stopped seeing her, then it's over. He'll forget about her,” Pascale said, looking hopeful, but still desperately sorry for her friend.

“Maybe he will forget her. But I won't,” Diana said honestly. “Every time I look at him, I'll know he betrayed me. I hate him for it.”

“That's understandable,” Pascale said sympathetically. “But it happens to people sometimes. Maybe it could even have happened to you. If he ended it with this girl, you have to try to forgive him for it. Diana, you can't divorce him. It will ruin your life, as well as his. You love each other.”

“Apparently not as much as I thought. At least he doesn't.” There was nothing in her eyes of forgiveness, only anger and hurt and disappointment, and Pascale felt so sorry for her.

“What does he say about it?”

“That he's sorry. That it'll never happen again. That he regretted it the minute he did it, but he still did it for three months, and it might have gone on longer if Katherine's baby hadn't gotten sick that night. He might even have left me for her.” Diana only cried harder as she said the words.

“He can't be that stupid.” But he was handsome and looked terrific for his age, and he dealt with women all day long. He had more opportunities than most men to meet women. And anything was possible, even for a man as responsible and trustworthy as Eric. But she could see in Dianas eyes what it had done to her. Pascale was amazed she had actually come on this vacation, and asked her about it.

“I wasn't going to after I found out, but he begged me to come. And now he says he can only stay for two weeks, and if he goes, I"m going to think he's with her every minute.”

“Maybe you should believe him, that it's over,” Pascale said quietly, but Diana looked furious about it.

“Why should I believe him? He lied to me. How can I possibly be expected to trust him?” She had a point, and Pascale didn't know what to answer. But it broke her heart to think of them ending their marriage. “I just don't think I can stay married to him, Pascale. It will never be the same for me again, and I probably shouldn't have come on this vacation. I told him I was going to call a lawyer before we left, and he asked me to wait at least until this trip is over. But I don't think it'll make any difference.” It was a heavy burden to be taking with them on the trip, like a set of lead luggage. And it didn't bode well for the vacation. “Would you stay married to John if he cheated on you?” Diana asked her, looking her in the eye with a bitter expression. She didn't even seem like the same woman. She had always been so carefree and so happy, as had Eric. And they had such a great relationship. Of the three couples, Pascale had always thought they had the best marriage, or maybe Robert and Anne did. She and John had always had their differences, and they argued a lot more than the others. And now Anne was gone, and Diana was talking about divorcing Eric. It didn't bear thinking.

“I don't know what I would do,” Pascale said honestly. “I"m sure I'd want to kill him.” John always talked a lot about women, but Pascale never thought he did anything about it. In fact, she was sure he didn't. He just liked the aura it gave him. But it was all talk and bravado in his case. “I think I'd have to give it a lot of thought before I did anything, and maybe try to trust him again. People do these things sometimes, Diana.”

“Don't be so French about it,” Diana growled at her, and then started to cry again. She was absolutely miserable, and she was still sorry she had come on this vacation. Every time she looked at him, it upset her. She didn't know how she was going to get through the month, or even another day, with him.

“Maybe the French are right about some things,” Pascale said gently. “You have to give it a lot of thought before you do anything you'll regret later.”

“He should have done that, before he slept with that woman,” Diana said angrily. And it seemed particularly cruel that the woman was so much younger. It made Diana feel suddenly old and unattractive. He had hurt her in the most painful way possible, and she didn't know how she was going to live through it, or if their marriage would survive.

“Have you told anyone?” Pascale asked cautiously.

“Only you,” Diana answered. “I"ve been too ashamed to. I don't know why I should feel embarrassed, but I do. It makes me feel like less of a person, as though I wasn't enough for him.” She truly looked devastated.

“Diana, you know that's not true. He just did something very stupid. And I"m sure he's embarrassed too,” Pascale said, trying to be fair to both of them. “I think it was brave of you to come here.” She actually admired her for it, although it was obvious Diana wasn't looking forward to being there. She was too distraught to care about the trip.

“I didn't want to let you down,” Diana said sadly, “or Robert. I know how hard it will be for him to come here. I felt I owed it to him too. I came more for him than for Eric.”

“Maybe it will do you both good to be here,” Pascale said hopefully. But they needed a lot more than a vacation on the Riviera. Their marriage needed major surgery, not Band-Aids.

“I don't think I'll ever forgive him for it,” Diana said, crying again. “Not yet certainly. But maybe in time,” Pascale said wisely. She put an arm around her friend then, and they hugged each other, and after a while they went back to the living room to join their husbands. And when the men came back inside after their cigars, Pascale could see now the chasm between Diana and Eric. They looked at each other as though they had lost each other, and Pascale's heart ached for them.

She was still looking depressed about it when she and John went upstairs to their bedroom, and he noticed it immediately, which was unusual for him. Sometimes he was far less perceptive about her. “Is something wrong?” He wondered if he had inadvertently done or said something to upset her.

“No, I was just thinking.” She didn't want to say anything to him, unless Diana gave her permission. She didn't want to violate her confidence, and she had meant to ask her if she could tell him, but she hadn't.

“What about?” John asked, looking concerned. Pascale really looked worried.

“Nothing important. What to make for lunch tomorrow.” She lied to him, but only to protect Diana and Eric"s secret.

“I don't believe you. Is it something big?” “Sort of.”

“I think I know what it is. Eric just told me he and Diana were having problems.” John looked upset about it too.

“Did he say what kind of problems?”

“No. Men aren't usually that specific. He just said they had hit a rough spot in the marriage.”

“She wants to divorce him,” Pascale said, looking grief-stricken. “That would be just awful. For both of them.”

“Is it another woman?” John asked, and she nodded. John looked as distressed as she did.

“He says it's over, but Diana says she's too hurt to forgive him.” “I hope they'll work it out,” John said, looking concerned. “They"ve got thirty-two years behind them. That counts for something.” He pulled her into his arms then, with a gentle look, which was unlike him. Most of the time he was gruff and blustery, but beneath it, she knew he loved her. “I missed you,” he said gently.

“I missed you too,” she smiled at him, and then he kissed her. And a moment later, he turned the lights out and took her in his arms. It had been six weeks since they'd seen each other, a long time in any marriage, but he knew how much being in Paris meant to her, and he would never have deprived her of it. She lived for her time there every year.

They lay in each other's arms for a long time that night, after they made love, with a full moon shining in their bedroom window. And after he fell asleep, she lay next to him and watched him, wondering how she would feel if he ever did to her what Eric had just done to Diana. She knew how devastated she would be. Just as much so as Diana. And all she could think as she looked at him was how lucky she was to have him. He was all she needed and wanted, and always had been.

The next morning, as Pascale made breakfast for all of them, John arrived in the kitchen looking somewhat panicked. He was holding a brass handle in one hand, as Agathe drifted through, wearing a leopard bikini, platform shoes, and wearing a Walkman as she carried a dustbin and sang to herself loudly. John stopped long enough to stare at her in disbelief, as Pascale continued to scramble eggs, looking totally unconcerned by the vision Agathe presented. She had gotten used to her by then, and seemed entirely oblivious to her appearance.

“The toilet is flooding!” John announced, waving the brass handle at her. “What am I supposed to do about it?”

“I don't know. Can't you deal with it? I"m cooking.” Pascale looked vaguely amused as he continued to wave the brass handle in her direction. “Why don't you call Marius and get him to help you?” she suggested, and he rolled his eyes in irritation.

“How do I know where to find him? And how do I tell him what happened?”

“Just show him,” Pascale said as she waved at Agathe to catch her attention. She was still singing, but she finally took the Walkman off while Pascale explained the problem. But she didn't look surprised, she just took the brass handle from John and waddled off to find her husband. He appeared minutes later with a bucket, a mop, and a plunger. He was wearing shorts and a see-through T-shirt, and he looked excruciatingly hung over.

Agathe was telling her by then it happened all the time, and wasn't a big problem, and just as she said it, a thin stream of water began trickling through the kitchen ceiling. And both John and Pascale looked up in panic. He left at a dead run to return to the scene of the crime, and Marius followed him more slowly, as Agathe put her Walkman back on, and sang loudly as she set the table.

Eric and Diana walked into the kitchen then, and Eric looked startled when he saw Agathe in her leopard bikini and apron. “That's a look,” he said circumspectly, and Diana burst into laughter.

“Does she always look like that?” Diana asked, as Pascale turned off the stove and smiled at her. She was pleased to see that they both looked a little more relaxed and rested than they had the night before.