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Later teachings of Turess, now considered more of a recommendation than a law
By the time the sun was high in the sky, Ilarra had already been standing by the window for a long time. Her rest had consisted of closing her eyes for about an hour, and then spending another hour watching Raeln dozing uncomfortably near the door where he had fallen over post-meditation. She could only imagine he was as nervous as she and had drifted from his intended meditation to a fitful sleep by accident.
Once dawn appeared, lighting the room around her, Ilarra had gone to the window and stared at the city outside as it came to life. She lost herself in watching the city go about its early morning rituals.
Lantonne had always fascinated Ilarra and somehow still managed to, even after all that had happened to her. Nowhere else in the world had she ever heard of a town so open to all people, accepting anyone who could claim to be a free man. People did what they wanted with who they wanted, without interference from government or their fellow citizens. There were some who disapproved of one thing or another, but it was not the way of Lantonne to encourage that mindset.
It was the antithesis of all that the Turessians constantly yammered in her mind, demanding that she hate Raeln and his kind and denigrating most other races as inferior. Even her own race was somewhat frowned upon, but they made exceptions for elves that they did not for wildlings.
Hearing how elves and every other non-human were beneath true Turessians often made Ilarra feel like less than a real person. The intent pressed against the back of her mind at all times, even though there were no words to the feelings. With the ever-present desire to speak ill of even her own people, it was difficult for Ilarra to feel like anything more than another tool of the Turessians. Which made it all the more appealing to watch the free Lantonnians outside, going about their mundane and often pointless days.
Often in recent weeks, Ilarra had wondered why they kept acting like nothing was happening in the world around them. They seemed ignorant of the war that had already conquered lands in all directions. Even if they were unaware of the happenings elsewhere, surely they must know Altis would be at their doors within days or weeks.
After spending time watching them from her window each day, she had come to the conclusion that they probably knew what was coming: the undead would soon march into their lives and possibly end those lives brutally. They chose to ignore that fact in favor of enjoying each day as they had the one before, refusing to give up what they had.
Ilarra could only envy the people of Lantonne. Unlike them, she could never ignore the threat of the Turessians. They were very real for her. If she tried, she would begin to feel their influence pushing her toward awful things they wanted her to do to help them.
Looking over at Raeln, Ilarra could feel the desire of the Turessians pushing against her will, demanding she slit his throat while he slept. That wish had grown stronger since his return, and she had actually caught herself eyeing a knife fastened securely to Greth’s hip during the night. She had already figured out how to take the weapon and kill Greth silently before she realized she had even been thinking about it. Another week or two and she had no doubt that she would attack Raeln, no matter what she wanted, even with Nenophar’s help. The pressure to act on behalf of the Turessians was growing stronger. Even without her magic fully returned, they could push her to kill—as proven by her attack on Greth the day before. Thankfully, he had said nothing to Raeln. It was only a matter of time and she would never stop trying to kill the two men. Until then, she wanted Raeln to believe that she was still the foolish girl he had spent his life protecting.
“Are we charging in the front door after Therec, or are we going to be more careful?” asked Greth, making Ilarra jump. She had not noticed him open his eyes; he was watching her through narrowed lids. He spoke softly, likely to keep from waking Raeln. “I’m not opposed to fighting my way through city guards, but it’s going to be a long day if we’re fighting from the front doors all the way to the top of the tower. We do have limits.”
“I don’t anymore,” admitted Ilarra, looking away. “If enough of my magic is back, I cannot die. Nothing anyone in the tower can do will keep me down for long. Normally, I would say this is a curse, but under the circumstances…”
“Then let me rephrase: how do the two lowly wildlings survive going into that place?”
Ilarra stared up at the tower, rising high and casting its shadow over the western part of the city and the walls beyond. Therec could be anywhere in there, meaning they would need to go floor by floor to have any chance of finding him. Even if they could get past the few guards at the doors, there would be dozens if not hundreds of soldiers running to stop them while Therec hid or fled.
Greth and Raeln would be dead before they reached the second floor. Ilarra was not even certain what she had become would be enough to fight through those odds without exhausting her, especially in her weakened state.
“The two of you,” she said, “will sneak me in through one of the side entrances. I will go alone from there.”
“Ilarra…” Greth began, but apparently could not find a valid argument to continue.
“I’m not sending you away, Greth. I want a distraction while I find Therec. The more soldiers that leave the tower, the better my odds.”
Raeln’s voice behind Ilarra made her cringe, having hoped he would sleep through the explanation of her ideas. “We still don’t know what happens if they try to kill you.” Raeln still had his eyes closed when she looked back at him. “You might get back up, but I probably won’t. Once I die, your struggle will be far greater. We should go together to protect each other as we always have.”
Ilarra turned from the window and walked over to Raeln. Once she got close, he opened his eyes and studied her with a nervousness she was not used to seeing in him. He was genuinely afraid for both of them.
“There’s only one way I can protect you the way you’ve always protected me,” she told him, kneeling in front of him. Ilarra took his hands in hers. “The bond has to go away. Sooner or later, the magic the Turessians put on me will destroy us both. I don’t want to see it do to you what it’s done to others.”
“My mother,” said Raeln, a tremble of his hands the only indication of any feelings on the topic. “Tell me she’s dead.”
“She is. She fought it to the end.”
“Then when you go mad, Greth will kill me before he leaves,” he told her, and Ilarra saw Greth sit up sharply from the corner of her eye. “We both know the bond can’t be broken once it’s made. We’re stuck with it, so we need to do what we can to keep each other as we are for as long as we can.”
“Raeln, give me a moment to get my thoughts together.”
Letting her eyes unfocus, Ilarra slowly began to see the threads of magic that drifted around the room. Faint shapeless tendrils of light flowed like clouds all around them, feeding spells like those Ilarra could cast. She had never seen them until she had become one of the Turessians, but now they were always there, even when she was without the ability to form it into spells.
Among the clouds of energy, she could also see magic that was active in the form of a spell or enchantment. Foremost among those was a constant band of light coming from somewhere north, passing through the walls of the building and flowing into Ilarra’s chest. A great many smaller bands fanned out in all directions, connecting her to all the other Turessians, wherever they were. It was an eerie reminder that others like her were spread across many lands.
Ilarra forced the general magical aura of the world to fade into the background, followed by the energy connecting her to the other Turessians and them to her. Soon, the room had darkened—at least to her eyes—to the point where Ilarra could see more subtle magics at work. Among these were ambient energies that constantly whirled about her as a result of the magic sustaining her, though it was far weaker than the first time she had noticed it back at Nenophar’s cave.
Ilarra sought the pattern of energy drifting lazily between herself and Raeln in a pair of lines resembling glowing cobwebs. One fed her life energy into Raeln, while the other brought his calm and stability to her, something Nenophar had emphasized the importance of.
Ilarra shifted her vision again, this time bringing back the ties to the Turessians. Though stronger, those bonds appeared identical to the ones between herself and Raeln. When she had cut herself off from Dorralt, one distinct band of light had faded dramatically, but she had been unable to fully sever it. The ones between herself and Raeln were much weaker, and looking at them as she was, she thought they looked downright fragile.
Something out of place caught Ilarra’s attention as she studied the threads. The bracelet she had been meaning to ask him about had vanished. Normally, anything mundane would still show itself in dull colors, but the bracelet was completely gone. Not knowing what it meant, she ignored it, but decided she would try to find more information as time allowed.
“Raeln, what would you do with your life if you were free of me?” Ilarra asked eventually, eyeing the strands of energy created by her bond with him. “We’re facing death, so I would like to know where you would go if you had no ties to me anymore. Tell me your honest wishes.”
Sighing and leaning back against the broken door, Raeln glanced over toward Greth, then caught himself and looked back to Ilarra. “I would probably die fighting to keep this town free of Altisian control,” he admitted, scratching at the bracelet. “There is nowhere else left to go. If I fled, I would be back here within the week. Better to fight for a city I barely know than to die out there alone.”
“Would you try to have a life…find someone and settle down?”
“You know I can’t do that, Ilarra. I try not to think about it, since it doesn’t matter. I’ve lived my whole life protecting others. I doubt I could stop now.”
Gently, Ilarra reached out and caught the threads of light between herself and Raeln with her fingertips. She knew Greth and Raeln only saw her holding her hand in front of her, but she tightened her grip on those bits of energy.
“Raeln,” she began again once she had the strands held firmly, “when you survive this war, promise me you will find a way to be happy somewhere. Even if Lantonne falls, promise you will find a new life.”
“Ilarra, I can’t…”
As he spoke, Ilarra snapped the strands of magic and severed the bond between them. Instantly, the weight of dozens if not hundreds of Turessian minds pressed down on Ilarra, making it difficult to breathe. She struggled to keep from falling over, but it took all her willpower. She found herself clinging to Raeln’s hand for support with the one she had not used to sever the magic.
“What did you just do?” Raeln demanded, his hand trembling in hers. He panted heavily and pressed his other hand to his forehead. “My skin’s burning and my heart is racing.”
Greth came quickly to Raeln’s side and tried to check his pulse, but Raeln shoved him away and grabbed Ilarra’s jaw, forcing her to look at him.
“Tell me what you did!” he growled, pulling her up as he stood.
Ilarra struggled to catch her breath, made more difficult by Raeln shifting both of his hands to her shoulders and clutching her so tightly she thought he might break her bones. Suddenly, Raeln’s shaking of her and the pain in her shoulders vanished, and she collapsed.
Looking up, Ilarra saw Greth had wrestled Raeln off of her and had pushed him against the wall. Greth kept Raeln held there until Raeln stopped trying to shove past him to get at Ilarra. Once Raeln did relax, he slid down the wall and curled into a ball on the floor, covering his face with his hands and pulling his legs up to his chin. Within seconds, he openly wept, digging his claws into his fur as he shook with each sob.
“Will he be okay?” Greth asked Ilarra, sitting down and watching Raeln nervously.
Ilarra could feel the same rush of emotions and confusing sensations across her body as Raeln, but the strain to keep the Turessian influence out vastly dwarfed it. She felt sick, like the whole scene was playing out somewhere distant and she was watching through a haze. “I think so,” she mumbled, though she worried she might be wrong. “It will take time. We’ve been bound for most of our lives. This…I think…it should be easier than if one of us died. It won’t be easy, but it will fade.”