Surrender to Me (18 page)

With
literally nowhere to go, I figure if I get this over and done with quickly, she
will let me out of this makeshift prison.

“I dunno, V. He
just said I’m the real Ava… whatever the hell that means. You know Jasper,
always the conundrum.”

V
shakes her head and pins me with her gaze. “No babe, I agree with him. This,”
she says, flicking my t-shirt between her fingers. “This is the real you. Not
the other crap you were wearing. Or the distant attitude you had. That’s not
the Ava we know. That’s the Ava Harper wants, and quite frankly that Ava blows
ass!”

I
cough back a laugh because V is always so articulate in her speeches.

“Okay
fine whatever. Can we just get out of here, I am seriously gagging.”

V
throws her arms around me, and I huff out a breath with the force of her
squeeze.

“I’ve
missed you, so don’t you dare change. And I mean that literally.”

“I’m
not going anywhere,” I reply with conviction, because for once, I mean it.

“Good.
Now let’s get the fuck out of here before I catch a disease.”

I
laugh, and we thankfully exit the stall in under three minutes.

As
we walk out of the bathroom, I don’t know what smells worse, in here or back in
the restroom. There are so many sweaty bodies in here, awaiting P.O.E, and that
thought makes me nervous for some unknown reason.

I
need a drink.

We
quickly down a few quick shots which go straight to my head, and as V and I
demolish our sixth shot, the lights dim and I know the boys are ready to play
their set.

They
start with their usual introduction, prepping the crowd for the arrival of
Jasper, and I get a little giddy because I have missed seeing him perform. I am
anticipating his arrival and almost fall flat on my face when he takes to the
stage. He is a sight for sore eyes in his ripped at the knee, black jeans and
grey muscle tank. His muscles are illuminated under the soft lights, and I
can’t help but notice how much bigger he’s gotten. His obliques are rippling
with each movement, and as he reaches up to adjust his guitar strap, his biceps
flex firmly.

He
nods in time with the beat, and when he finally joins in with his guitar, the
crowd goes wild and I smile widely, because I am so proud of him. Looking
around, I realize P.O.E have quite a following, and I miss not being around to
witness them acquiring all these new fans.

V
is standing near me, beaming as usual at Lucas. They are so in love that it may
borderline on being sickening, but when I witness their worship for one
another, I feel nothing but happiness for them.

Jasper
has started singing, and of course I am humming along with him, as I know every
word. I see him scan the crowd often, and I am hoping he is looking for me.

As
I peer around the crowded room, I notice Harmony standing off to the side,
staring at Jasper adoringly, and I feel sick to my stomach. V observes my
object of fascination and bumps into me with her shoulder, shaking her head
while mouthing, “He’s yours.”

I
shrug and play it off, but deep down I hope she’s right.

After
they play a few songs, I finally catch Jasper’s eye and he gives me a dimpled
smile, his tousled hair falling into his perfect cerulean eyes. Giving him a
small wave, he winks in acknowledgment, and once Jasper identifies where I am,
he seems to be directing his performance my way. Disregarding that as my
slightly inebriated brain playing tricks on me, I ignore the thrill it gives me
if that indeed holds some truth. But when he hushes the crowd and looks my way,
I know I am right.

“Hey
guys, we are going to do something we have never done before, so if it sucks,
please don’t tell anyone,” Jasper says with a small smile.

The
crowd lets out a loud chuckle, and Jasper turns around quickly, talking to
Lucas. I look over at V who looks just as baffled as I.

“Okay,
can I have thirty seconds of your time?”

The crowd
roars their consent, and Jasper smirks. “Naw, you guys rock.”

Jasper
is holding his pic between his thumb and forefinger as he cups the microphone
seductively, and I think the ovaries of every female in the room have just
exploded!

“We’re
going to play a cover.”

The crowd lets
out a playful ‘Boo,’ and Jasper clutches his heart teasingly.

“If
you don’t like it, then now is a good time to go get a drink or go to the bathroom,
whatever. But there is one person who needs to stay where she is, because this
is for her.” He openly looks at me and I gulp nervously.

They
start with a rocky tempo, and as soon as Jasper starts singing the first line,
my whole body breaks out in goose pimples. He has chosen, I Just Died In Your
Arms Tonight by Cutting Crew, and I don’t know what to do, because I feel like
I am about to pass out. V clutches onto me, and I lean into her for physical
and emotional support.

He
doesn’t take his eyes off of me for the whole song, and when he starts singing
the chorus, he emphasizes each word passionately.

His
messy hair is drenched in sweat, and his grey tank is sticking to his chest,
outlining his torso. I am salivating at the sight of him, but it’s the look on
his face that is getting to me.

I
can see that Jasper is just as conflicted about us as I am. He feels it too.

So,
what does this mean?

It
means I am totally screwed, and need another drink… or twenty.

After
Jasper finishes the song, he gives me a quick wink and continues on like
nothing happened. I signal to V that I am going to the bar, and push my way
through the crowd.

As
per usual the line is too long, and luckily Jasper’s voice is keeping me
entertained. I am bopping away, totally lost in his sensual voice, when I feel
someone yank on my upper arm.

“Owwww!”
I look over at a pair of cold blue eyes, assessing me bitterly.

He
is hurting me, so I attempt to shrug out of his grip.

“Ow
Harper, you’re hurting me,” I squeak as his grip tightens. “Let me go.”

I
try not to make a scene, but Harper has other ideas as he pulls me roughly into
him. “We’re leaving.”

I
look up at him and shake my head. “No, you can leave. I’m having a good time
and I am about to get a drink, so please let me go.”

“
I think you've had more than enough,” he sneers. 

He has a sharp hold on my upper arm, and I wince as he tightens his
hold even further.

Again I attempt to pull out of his grasp, but he won’t budge.

“I said you've had enough.”

The grip on my arm is so tight, I know it will leave a bruise, but I
stubbornly don’t move.

“Come on Ava, we're leaving before you embarrass yourself further.”

The look in Harper’s eyes actually scares me, and I know he is angry
because he has witnessed mine and Jasper’s exchange. I don’t know how much he
has seen, but it is enough to leave him seething.

I rummage around the room, desperately searching for Jasper, but
he's nowhere to be found as P.O.E have finished their set.

I don’t have much of a choice as Harper won’t let me go, so I huff,
“Fine!” as I finally shrug out of his grip, storming out the bar with Harper in
pursuit.

I explode outside and stumble slightly when I lose my footing on the
gravel.

Harper latches onto my arm, spinning me around to face him.

“What is the matter with you?” he snarls, spitting in my face in
anger.

“What are you talking about?” I reply, trying to shake him off me,
but to no prevail.

“You are better than subjecting yourself to that cheap nasty
alcohol.”

Looking at Harper, he looks more like a parent reprimanding their
child, than he does my fiancée.

“Oh please, listen to yourself. I'm twenty three. I'm supposed to be
getting drunk on nasty beverages. So should you, so lighten up.”

“Excuse me?” Harper’s face is one of pure annoyance, but I don't
take the hint.

“You're my boyfriend, not my dad, so stop acting like a jackass!”

I am on a roll and really shouldn’t be provoking him

when he is this angry.

“Are you serious? I’m you’re fiancé, not boyfriend, and I am only
trying to protect you from looking like a drunken whore.”

I flinch at the harshness of his tone, and also his choice of words.

“I beg your pardon. A whore? That's what you think of me?”

Harper can see he has hit below the belt with his unjust comment,
and his face softens slightly.

“Ava, no, of course not. I meant you were obviously affected by that
deadbeat singer and behaving quite loosely.”

I am no longer mad at his debasing comment directed at me. I am more
so furious at his undignified remark about Jasper.

“He is not a deadbeat,” I sneer. “And his name is Jasper.”

“I don't give a fuck what his name is,” he bites back, pushing me up
against a brick wall.

Feeling trapped with him pinning me against the scratchy surface, I
attempt to push him off, but my efforts are fruitless. 

“Let me go, Harper,” I shakily say, afraid of the crazy look in his
eyes.

“No,” he replies, lowering his face to mine, his eyes daring mine
coldly.

Pushing at his chest, which doesn't budge, I suddenly feel very
afraid of what he might do next.

“Let her fucking go.”

Both Harper and I turn to see my white knight.

Jasper.

*****

“You heard her. Let her go you pompous dick.”

Harper has a malicious grin on his face as he turns to face Jasper.
I quickly duck out of my Harper prison, afraid of the look in both his and Jasper’s
eyes.

“Excuse me? Who the hell are you to demand such things? This is none
of your business.”

Harper approaches Jasper menacingly, but Jasper stands his ground,
not intimated by him.

“I think it is,” Jasper replies as he crosses his arms over his
chest.

“Oh yeah?” Harper forebodingly sneers, getting into Jasper’s face.

“Yeah,” Jasper mocks.

I can feel the hatred pass over the both of them, so I quickly
intervene.

“Stop it,” I utter hysterically, afraid of the death stares they are
giving one another.

Attempting to wedge my way between the two of them, Jasper has other
ideas as he places a protective arm around my waist, shielding me behind him.

“Stay out of this, Ava,” he says while reaching for my hand, and
latching onto it.

Harper attempts to reach for me, but Jasper slaps his hand away.

“You lay a finger on her, and you'll lose it,” he warns, menace
clear in his voice.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” Harper says, clenching his
fists.

“I'm someone who wouldn't manhandle a woman.”

Harper’s nostril flare and I see pure rage reflected in his blue
eyes. I attempt to move, but Jasper tightens his grip.

Harper looks down at the connection and scowls. “Hands to yourself
vermin.”

“Harper!” I gasp, appalled at his offensive choice of words. 

“Unlike your buddy, I think my hands are welcomed.”

Harper gives me a heated look over Jasper’s shoulder.

“I'm leaving. Do you choose to stay here with him?”

I can feel Jasper’s grip stiffen, afraid of my reply.

I'm given a choice with who I will choose.

But there is no competition.

It’ll always be him.

“Yes,” I whisper after a moment of uncomfortable silence.

Jasper’s shoulders sag and I hear him breathe a relieved sigh.

I guiltily glance at Harper, who has a miserable look on his face,
he looks vulnerable and hurt and suddenly I feel really guilty. I think about
how he helped me survive my time apart from Jasper, and I feel horrible. What
kind of person am I? To do this to someone who helped me when I needed someone
the most.

“Very well, you know where I am if you change your mind. I will
always be here for you, Ava,” and he backs away, head bowed.

Only once he's gone, does Jasper loosen his hold on my hand. He
doesn't turn to face me though. His shoulders are hunched, and his head is
downward.

Apprehensively, I reach out to caress his shoulder, and I feel him
tense under my touch.

“Are you okay?”

Jasper shakes his head slowly.

Lightly running my fingertips over the wisps of hair curling at the
base of his neck, Jasper groans softly, and the sound does amazing things to my
insides. I bite my lip as I bravely run my hand through his messy locks, and
the silkiness of the thick strands under my fingers, leaves me salivating in
pure need.

It's been so long, but the emotion feels so familiar, it feels like
home.

Jasper breaks my daydream by slowly turning towards me, and I miss
the feel of him.

He tongues his lower lip, his eyes heated. “Why are you with him? I
can't believe he is the guy you have wasted your tears over. I can’t believe he
is the guy you chose over me?”

You gave me no choice! I internally scream.