Surrender to You (2 page)

The moment Carlie's text message flashed on my phone—after four years no less—I didn't hesitate to clear my schedule. Every message she'd sent me over the years had been this simple:
flight to Boston arrives at 11 am. subarctic club at 8 pm.

Her messages always meant only one thing:
meet and fuck.

As much as I traveled, I was surprised she knew I was here.

The woman next to me in the car shifted, placing one leg over the other. My gaze drifted up the perfect curve of her calves to the place where her garter ribbons peeked out from under her short leather skirt. Grace, as she'd called herself this time, watched the brownstone buildings we passed as we drove farther into downtown Boston. In the darkness of the Maserati, I could still make out every feature. Even if I closed my eyes, I could clearly recall everything about her. The dimple in her cheek when she truly smiled. The dark shine to her olive green eyes when she saw something she wanted. But her hair color was all wrong. How she thought blond hair was better than her natural red, I didn't know, but this was Carlie, after all. She jumped in headfirst on everything. On closer inspection, I noticed she was thinner than usual. Had she been working too much?

The makeup she wore covered all the endearing light brown freckles that dotted her face and trailed down her neck and back. Countless times I'd kissed that skin, commanded her with a single glance to fall to her knees so I could twine my hands in her curly, red hair and draw her mouth to my cock. My fingers on my right hand gripped my knee tighter. The need to reach for her grew stronger. Only a few inches separated us, but now wasn't the time to make my move.

Soon enough, my lazy moment taking her in came to an end. We reached the destination Carlie had given the driver: the Fulbright Hotel. I smiled at her choice. She'd picked one of my competitors. The dark interior of the car was suddenly illuminated by all the lights blanketing the entrance.

The bellman opened the door and offered his hand to help her out. Then it was just me and her walking side by side. Every once in a while, her arm brushed against mine and a sense of déjà vu crept in. We'd walked this path before in another place and another time. The apex of these events was always the same: we ended up in bed.

And yet, standing this close to her left my stomach muscles tense, my breath quickening and my heart racing. We reached the elevator, and the doors opened not long after I pressed the button. Instead of an empty cab, a family of seven took up most of the space. The parents beckoned an older boy and what looked to be his girlfriend, along with three younger kids, to make some room. We shuffled inside and took a spot in the left corner. Ironically, we faced each other, nearly nose to nose, with little room to budge. Her back was to the wall and I practically caged her in.

She was right where I wanted her.

She looked up at me and bit her upper lip. A pout. I glanced downward, watching the way she tilted forward a bit until I could see down the front of her black blouse.
No bra this time.

This elevator was going too slow.

“
Maman,
when are we going to the aquarium?” the little girl asked the older woman in French.

“Stop asking,” the older boy grated. “We just got here.”

Carlie glanced at the boy's hand clutching his girlfriend's. A genuine smile touched the corner of her mouth and the dimple she hid most of the time with her impassive expressions appeared. Now that was the real Carlie I missed. When I'd first met her I was eighteen, she was sixteen and free in a way I never was, but that spark seemed hidden beneath the woman she became. This woman would let go of my hand if I tried to hold hers right now. Just looking at the young couple made me wonder if that could've been us if we'd held on to each other.

On the fifteenth floor, the family left. Carlie pushed forward a bit so I gave her space as we rode the elevator up to the penthouse suites. So far I wasn't impressed—for the price I'd have to pay for the room, I'd expected the kinds of perks I placed in the hotels I built. I had yet to see what the Fulbright had to offer in the suite, so I reserved my judgment. Silence filled the expansive room we entered. Instead of having a seat on one of the plush sofas or going to the bedroom, I headed to the minibar and poured vodka into a shot glass.

“Do you want one?” I asked her.

“No, sir.” Right down to business like always.

By the time I downed the shot and turned around, she had discarded her black blouse and leather skirt, exposing the beautiful curve of her back. The burn down my throat from the alcohol was nothing compared to the fiery need building inside me just from watching her. Starting at her shoulders, down to the middle of her back, a bright red tattoo of a phoenix rose as if preparing for flight. The bird's wingspan spread from one shoulder to the other, and the flames cascading from the tattoo's tail left a trail for me to follow to her lovely ass. At the dip in her back, a new tattoo consisting of Latin words caught my attention—as well as the way her thighs seemed smaller.

So she really had lost weight, not much, but enough for me to notice the deeper dimple along her buttocks. As the alcohol jolted my senses, she pushed down her panties and tossed them on the couch. Every time this happened, I captured the moment in my head. The image was crystal clear. She'd walk to me like she was now and not like all the other times when she'd walked away.

When she finally looked at me, a brief exchange of messages passed between us.

Do you want me?
her eyes asked as she ran a fingertip across her lips, then through her hair.

I took a step toward her.
I want to possess every part of you.

I won't let you catch me tonight.
She backed toward the bedroom. Oh heaven, I loved her tits. The dark pink tips, with their beautiful golden ring piercings, were one of her features I dreamt about the most. She was a polished package on the outside, but once her clothes were off, you caught her uninhibited side.

You can never escape me,
I thought as I advanced faster, eventually catching her and hoisting her in my arms until her chest was pressed against mine.

For now, I had her where she belonged: with me.

In the darkness of the suite's bedroom, I hoped Tomas wouldn't see the emotions I locked away inside of me. Every time we were together, my feelings for him welled up inside until they were overflowing.

Like when he placed me on the bed and stood over me. What I wouldn't give to stretch out the seconds into minutes. The minutes into hours.

Boldly, he waited, staring down as if he saw through me.

Does he long for me as much as I long for him?

My fingers itched to take off his clothes so we could be skin to skin.

“What would you do if I tied you up so you could never escape me?” he asked.

I froze. “I'd still escape. I'm that good.”

He closed in, and hopefully, he couldn't see the dare in my downturned eyes.

“Then I'll have to make my point.” His breath warmed the side of my face, and I squeezed my eyes shut as if such an action would drive the tiger back into its cage. “You might be brave now, but when I'm done with you, you won't be sitting for a week.”

I didn't dare look at his face. I belonged to him to do with as he wished. Without any clothes on, all the walls I'd built around myself were gone. If he looked closer, he'd see the eagerness in my eyes as he unbuttoned his gray shirt. My gaze drank in his hard pecs and the ink beautifully drawn on his light brown skin. From his pecs down to his hard, muscled stomach, a hawk with piercing gray eyes peered back at me. Lightning bolts danced along the feathers. Among the colorful tattoos on his arms and back, that particular one had always been a personal favorite of mine. He shrugged off one sleeve then another, but he was taking too damn long.

I reached for his leather belt.

“No.”
His hand locked over my wrist.

I looked up at him.

He grabbed a fistful of my hair with his other hand and yanked me forward. A delicious thrill raced down my scalp as I was forced to kneel on the carpeted floor.

“Already defiant…Grace?” he growled.

“Patience was never a virtue of mine,” I whispered.

He let go of my hair and my wrist. “Hands behind your back. Now.”

“Yes, sir.” I couldn't see him anymore, but the sound of him reaching into his pocket sent me spiraling into bliss. I didn't have to wait long for him to deftly cuff my hands behind my back with bondage hemp. I wiggled my fingers. I was comfortable, yet contained.

From his other pocket, he plucked out a small pair of portable shears. I held back my grin.

Safety first.

When it came to kinky sex between Tomas and me, there were only a few rules—the first being that there were no sexual boundaries between us, only boundaries of the heart. I, for one, had never been into the kinky club scene, and I suspected the same of him.

When we were together, I belonged to him. I was for his pleasure only and what he wanted to do was run a fingertip across my cheek, down my collarbone, and finally to the V between my breasts. Lower and lower his hand drifted, offering me feather-like touches over my quivering stomach until his finger brushed against my sex.

“Sir, you talk a good game,” I murmured as he boldly pressed his fingertip hard against my clit. “I really—oh…mmmm.”

“You're wet.”

I was soaking wet.

“Since I read your text, I've been thinking all day about touching you…” he said. With his other hand, he traced my lower lip. “I thought about fucking you…”

My mouth parted and my tongue darted out. I couldn't stop myself from sucking his long fingers, which faintly tasted like vanilla vodka, into my mouth.

He took a step away from me, tugging me to stand. Where were we going? “That mouth of yours will get you into trouble again,” he whispered. “Turn around and lie on the bed.”

“No.” My reply was swift. I rather liked this game.

He grabbed me by the hair again and had me facedown with my ass up on the bed before I could protest. I turned my head to the side—right as he smacked my left ass cheek. Hard.

I cringed. That was just a warning shot.

He smoothed his palm over the stinging skin, kneading the flesh until I almost forgot another strike would come.

“You have to control everything, don't you?” He slapped my ass twice again. The searing pain forced me to clench my fists. I couldn't bite back my cry this time. “You want to control when you come and when you go.” He leaned down to draw my earlobe into his mouth as his finger slid deep inside my channel. With each stroke of his fingers, pleasure and pain blended together into a perfect melody. “But when you're here with me, I say what goes,
Coração.
”

Oh, the things he did to me when he called me his heart in Portuguese. The nickname mocked my insistence to keep Carlie out of this room. Rarely did I hear that endearment. Only behind the doors of a hotel room.

I shuddered from an oncoming climax. Tension stretched across my stomach.
I'm almost there.

Then he stopped.

I swallowed my protest, knowing what was coming.

Tomas tortured me in more ways than one.

“You ready for one more,
Coração
? That should set you straight,” he whispered. I managed a nod and he withdrew from me.

At first, my body stiffened for the next smack, like it always did, but I immediately relaxed, ready and eager to take what he'd give me.

Tomas landed a solid flat palm against my right ass cheek.

“Damn it…” I hissed between clenched teeth. The pain was intense enough for my head to start spinning.

“That's my girl. You're lucky I didn't bring my flogger.” He drew me into his arms and I melted against him. His breaths against my forehead were as ragged as mine.

Slowly, his hands ran over my arms, his touch eliciting goosebumps over my skin. The need to reach for his belt again left me trembling. I needed him inside of me—no—need wasn't right. I
had
to have him inside of me.

But saying that out loud was something I refused to do. I'd rather use actions than words.

Face-to-face, even in the semi-darkness, I couldn't think straight with his intense gaze focused on me. Our lips hovered so close together. I'd lost track of how long it had been since we'd last kissed. Years, perhaps. Now we no longer dared to do what hurt us the most, but that didn't make the yearning go away. My heart ached from the need to kiss his lips. To place my palms over his cheeks and draw his mouth to mine.

Oh, Tomas, how I've missed you.

Maybe my hands were tied for his safety as well as mine.

Tomas finally stood and removed the rest of his clothes. All I could do was lie there and watch. We'd known each other since I was sixteen and he was eighteen. Ten years had passed, yet my heart still quickened watching his beautiful naked form crawl along the bed toward me. He was the predator and I was his prey, waiting to be consumed.

I wanted him to do as he pleased and take everything I had to offer. For one night, I was willing to do that.

Seeing Carlie curled up on her side with her arms tied behind her back did something to me that was hard to describe. Strands of her blond hair covered her cheekbones. Her full lips were parted. I loved everything about her—the way her soft green eyes followed me, the delicate flushed skin along her ass. I'd give anything to wake up with her in my bed every morning so I could fuck her again and again, but this was what I had to settle for: a night of sex until the dawn chased her away.

As tempting as it would be to sample every inch of her skin with my tongue, I knew how this game was played. I hunted and she ran.

I grabbed her legs and tugged her toward me as I knelt on the bed and leaned over her. The soft noise she made as I wrapped her legs around my hips sent the heat filling me up to a feverish pitch.

With her arms tied behind her back, I had her exactly where I wanted her. As much as she acted like a sub, half the time I wondered if she was a switch.

Sliding into the warmth of Carlie's body, I groaned with satisfaction. Her body enveloped me and every errant thought I had about leaving her behind and ending this madness faded away. That's what always happened and I accepted it.

We fit perfectly together. With each pulse of my hips, she twisted hers to meet mine. At times like this, with her thighs clenching my hips and breasts brushing against my chest as she arched her back, I fell into a place where all my worries seeped away and there was nothing left but Carlie and me.

I went faster, grabbing her ass so I could go deeper. With my face settled at the crook of her neck, I sucked in her decadent pear-like scent before I sampled the skin along her neck. From there, I loved nibbling along her mouth while she panted.

“Tomas…”

I looked at her. Those delicious lips of hers were made to be kissed. I knew every inch of them—like how her top lip was a bit smaller than the bottom.

She moaned as our bodies met again. Our pleasure was rising again. Much faster than I'd wanted. I clenched her tighter. She urged me to go faster, her hips swirling in a manner that pushed her hard against my cock. Soon enough, she stiffened underneath me, finding her climax like she always did.

All the while, I watched, wishing I could swallow her cries with my mouth and tongue. I'd tried that the last time we met, and she'd turned her head.

Only a fool got spurned twice.

I followed her soon after; my body turning to steel above hers. She didn't move and let me rest my chin against her forehead.

“Tomas?” She ended the silence.

“You all right?”

“Mmmm-hmm.” From the corner of my eye, I caught her grin. “You seemed really relaxed.”

“I am.” I was at peace.

Gently, I withdrew from her and turned her over to untie her wrists. We'd done this task so many times it seemed like second nature now for me to untie her wrists and then massage the skin along her arms. First, the palms. Carlie's hands were quite small, but from experience I knew they were strong. Her wrists were always delicate, but this time I frowned at how much her wrist bones protruded.

“You look thinner,” I said evenly. “Have you been working too much?”

She rolled her eyes. “I run a business—just like you—but I don't happen to have thousands of employees at my disposal.”

“That's no excuse. If you need—”

Immediately, she gave me the look: lowered eyebrows, a straight line to her lips, and the dimple I adored vanishing in an instant. “I don't need anything.”

She never needed anything from me until I became the last resort.

“You need to take better care of yourself,
Coração
,” I said softly.

She melted a bit, taken aback.

“I know. I've decided to change a few things while I'm back in the U.S.” She tugged me into her arms. Now that they were free, she ran her hands up and down my chest. Already, my body was responding to her bold touch.

“I plan to be a good girl,” she murmured. “Right after I get on your cock and do what needs to be done.”

I didn't sleep the whole night.

Again and again, we reached for and gave each other what we needed, but as soon as dawn threatened to come, I rolled over in bed and called for room service: I ordered our usual. No matter what, Carlie wasn't leaving without having breakfast with me.

She continued to slumber, snoring softly like she always did after we had sex all night. She'd always been a hard sleeper.

While she was lying on her side, I watched her naked back as she slept, the phoenix tattoo rising and falling with her deep breaths. Now that I was up close and personal, I could finally read the letters on her back.

FABER EST SUAE QUISQUE FORTUNAE

What did that mean? I'd never seen that quote before.

I crept out of bed and hurried to the shower, taking her purse with me for insurance. By the time I got out, the food would be here and we could eat in bed like we did last time in Amsterdam.

After a nice fifteen-minute shower, I emerged from the bathroom to see her putting her shoes on.

“Going somewhere?” I held up her purse, but she snatched it back.

“Wait a sec.” I reached for her again, but somehow I managed to stop myself. We were in a familiar play, and I knew the ending of this tragedy by heart.

“While you were sleeping I ordered pancakes,” I said sternly. Much more sternly than I'd wanted. “With fresh strawberries.”

A hint of a smile touched her lips. Did she remember how much fun we had making a mess as we fed each other? The way we died with laughter over spilled whipped cream that we eventually used to sample each other's skin?

“I have important business to handle this morning,” she declared.

There was always business separating us. “Of course.”

“I'm finally looking into that address you gave me.”

“So it's time to meet your birth parents?”

She nodded.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” I tugged on my pants as quickly as I could.

At the doorway, she paused. Her straight back spoke volumes. She was leaving—even if I commanded her back to my bed.

“I asked you for help, and I shouldn't have done that.” Her intent was clear. “I shouldn't do that anymore. Owing you anything is a burden I'm not too good at carrying.”

Owing me?
So anytime I did something for her I expected something in return? Love didn't work that way. Immediately pissed off, I took a step toward her, but her hand went up to stop me.

“I really have to go, Tomas.” Her face was apologetic as she made her final escape. “I'm sorry. It was great seeing you.”

I clenched my fists hard enough for my fingertips to cut into my palms. Getting angry didn't change a damn thing. As usual, her final words left my heart empty and waiting to be filled again.