Surviving Raine 02 Bastian's Storm (19 page)

“
You don’t know that,” she said again. “Bastian, you can’t promise that!”

I untwisted my arms from around her and took her face in my hands, forcing her to look at me.

“
I
can
,” I told her as I stared into her deep, brown eyes. “I
can
fucking promise you that! I’m going to do this, and I’m going to fucking win. I never lose, Raine—
never
. I did it for the fucking money before. Do you really think I won’t win when it’s you and my kid on the line? No one will fucking touch me. No one. I’ll wipe them out in the first day, you hear me?”

Tears fell to her cheeks again, but she nodded.

“
You understand me?” I asked.

“
Yes,” she whispered. “Bastian…”

“
Shhh.” I released her face and embraced her again. I kissed the top of her head as I held her, and she clung to my shoulders. Her audible cries stopped, but I could still feel her tears on my skin.

“
If anything happens to you,” she said, “if you get hurt, or…or…”

“
I’m going to be fine,” I repeated.

“
Not if something happens to you,” she argued. “I’d die.”

“
Nothing will happen to me,” I said. “Not you, either.”

She let out a long breath, and the air tickled my skin. I felt her relax against me, and I tilted my head to kiss her gently on the side of her face.

“
I’ve got you,” I whispered against her cheek.

Eventually her breathing evened out, and I knew she had fallen asleep on me, emotionally exhausted. I closed my eyes and tried to figure out how I was going to make good on my promise to her. I had meant every word of it, but I also knew this would be like no other tournament I had fought before. It wasn’t money or my reputation on the line—it was Raine and my son. She was my world, and now, so was my son. I wanted him to be a part of it, too.

Alex.

I had to win. There was no question about it. I couldn’t even entertain the possibility of another outcome. To win, I was going to have to know exactly what I was up against. I had to know each and every one of my opponents, what they were capable of, their weaknesses, and exactly what I needed to do to defeat every last one of them.

I needed to do some research.

The decision was made. At least for now, I had to prepare myself to fight.

I woke early in my usual position: my arms wrapped tightly around Raine with my body partially on top of hers. I had one leg tossed over both of hers as well, and her head was tucked securely against my shoulder. There were fading thoughts of dreams in my head, but I couldn’t remember their nature.

Looking down on Raine’s face, the anger, fear, and passion from the night before had transformed to an unusual sense of peace.

Pushing a little strand of hair off her forehead, I stared at her closed eyes and thought about her list of reasons she loved me. She always listed my strength first. I planned to keep her safe through my physical strength and my skills as a fighter, but I knew I needed more. I needed the strength of mind to overcome what was happening.

I needed to plan, which wasn’t exactly my strong point. I usually acted more impulsively, responding to the situation as it unfolded as opposed to setting the stage to ensure the outcome I chose. Offing a major crime lord wasn’t going to be something that happened without a precise plan, and I knew that. I was going to have to devise a way to give me access to Franks long enough to kill him and get myself back out alive.

Raine would have to be kept in the dark about all of it. There was no way I was going to let her in on my plan to kill Franks. I didn’t want her to be even more worried than she already was, and I was afraid of giving her too much information about what was going to happen. She already knew enough, and she hated what the inescapable future held. My Raine valued people’s lives in a way I wasn’t accustomed to, and she wouldn’t like the idea of me taking any additional lives to ensure the continued safety of her and my son.

I still wasn’t sure what to do about Landon, but that was secondary. I would prefer to find some way out of it all without having to kill him, but I wasn’t sure if that was going to be possible. Ultimately, he was still the father I never had.

I’m a father.

Every time I thought about Alex, I tried to create some kind of picture in my head of what he might look like. I wondered if he looked like I did at the same age, and that reminded me that I didn’t even have a picture of myself from when I was a kid.

Raine stirred a little, and as I glanced back at her, I wondered how it would sound if she added “you’re a good father” to my list of positive traits. The thought warmed me, and I held her a little closer as her eyes fluttered open.

Like most mornings when there wasn’t an immediate need to get out of bed, we spent time just looking at each other. I pushed her hair away from her face and stroked her cheek softly, and Raine smiled up at me, closed her eyes to my touch, and sighed.

“
You’re beautiful,” I said quietly.

“
I doubt that,” Raine snickered. “I’m always a mess in the morning.”

I had to correct her.

“
A beautiful mess.”

Raine smiled. I was about to kiss her, but my phone buzzed with a text from John Paul.

Wakey wakey! Eggs and fuckin bakey!

I rolled my eyes.

“
Who is that?” Raine asked.

“
JP,” I said. “I have to get up.”

I took a quick shower. When I was done, I found fresh coffee waiting for me in the kitchen. Raine had her own cup in her hand, and she held onto it tightly without drinking.

“
What happens now?” Raine asked. The tension in her voice was plain.

“
I’m going to train with JP,” I said. “That will be for the next few days. After that, Landon said three weeks of training.”

“
Where will you go for that?”

“
I don’t know for sure,” I said. “Landon’s being in Miami makes me wonder if the tournament will take place somewhere around here, which would mean we stay close—in the same atmosphere. It’s best to train in the type of environment where you’re going to fight.”

“
Where will I be?” Raine asked quietly.

Fuck. So much for my planning skills.

“
I haven’t gotten that far,” I admitted. “I’ll talk to John Paul.”

“
I could stay with Nick and Lindsay,” Raine suggested.

“
No,” I said. “They can’t protect you.”

“
We could go on a trip or something,” she said. “Stay out of the way?”

I shook my head.

“
I want to know exactly where you are,” I replied. “If you’re not where I expect you to be, I won’t know if you’re safe or not.”

I was teetering on scaring her, which I didn’t want to do, but I wasn’t going to let her far from my sight if it could be helped. I moved closer and wrapped my arms around her. Raine placed her head on my shoulder and sighed.

“
I hate this,” she whispered.

“
I know,” I said. “I hate it, too. This time next month it will all be over, and you, me and Alex…well, we have to figure that part out.”

A thought occurred to me, and I leaned back and placed my palm on her cheek.

“
I need you to help me figure that shit out,” I said. “I need you to get whatever the hell we’re gonna need with a kid around. I don’t know anything about that shit.”

“
You think I do?”

I think you need to focus on something that isn’t about me killing people.

“
I think you have a better chance of understanding it than I do. If you can put up with my childish ass, you can probably deal with a six-year-old as well.”

Raine gave me a tight lipped smile as another text from John Paul told me to come and meet him at the front door.

“
I’ll be gone a while,” I told Raine, “just to the gym upstairs. Keep your phone close, and don’t open the fucking door for anyone, even if you think you know who it is.”

“
Okay,” she said as she bit down on her lip.

“
I’ve got you,” I said again, and she nodded.

I kissed her softly before we parted, and I went downstairs to meet John Paul at the entrance to our building. We headed up to the gym and started working out.

“
Funny how old patterns fall back into place,” John Paul remarked as he watched me do leg presses on the machine. “It’s just like old times, isn’t it?”

“
You knew about this the other day, didn’t you?” I accused.

“
Maybe,” John Paul said as he winked at me. “Couldn’t say anything, but glad you took my advice anyway.”

“
I thought it was an order,” I muttered. I pushed out another set of leg presses and then switched to dumbbells.

I kept it up until sweat was pouring off of me, and every muscle in my body ached. I was glad I had been spending some time at the gym lately because John Paul was ruthless on the weight training. I could keep up, but only barely.

I wasn’t about to let him know that, though.

So I pushed myself as much as humanly possible. It was territory I knew—push beyond your limits and never stop, never let go. I ached, I sweated, and I burned through sets like a maniac just to show John Paul that I could.

He knew exactly what I was doing.

“
Is that all you got?” John Paul snorted. “You’re a wuss.”

“
Fuck you,” I said as I slammed the weights down to the floor. “I don’t see you pushing out this many reps.”

“
Not my training, bro.”

I extended my middle finger toward him as I completed another set of curls. At least I hadn’t lost much strength in my biceps, but I’d neglected leg workouts, and even I had to admit my gut was a little flabby from lack of ab work. I never should have let myself go so much. Now that Raine had to count on my strength, I wasn’t at my best.

I had to rectify that.

I also had to make sure she was safe even when I wasn’t around.

“
I need Raine protected,” I said to John Paul as I shifted my weight on the bench and switched arms. “I want someone I trust around her all the time when I’m not.”

“
Not sure who that would be,” John Paul said. “Is there anyone you trust?”

“
You,” I said simply.

“
You want me looking after your chick?”

“
Who else?”

John Paul scratched his arm, looked up at the ceiling, and considered for a moment.

“
Can I fuck her?”

I stood up, dropped the dumbbell to the floor, and punched him in the face.

He stumbled backward from the blow but righted himself quickly as he laughed and rubbed at his chin.

“
I guess that’s a no.”

“
Fucking right it’s a no,” I said as I glared at him. “Don’t you fucking touch her.”

“
Duly noted.” He laughed again.

We finished our session, and John Paul came with me back to the condo. Raine had her school books spread out on the couch and coffee table, but I could tell she wasn’t getting any actual work done. I sat down beside her and tossed my arm over her shoulder, pulling her close, as John Paul helped himself to a bottle of water.

“
Ugh!” Raine groaned as she placed her hands on my chest and pushed me away. “You stink.”

“
You should have smelled him back in the day of booze and whores,” John Paul said.

Like I really needed him to bring that shit up.