Survivor (49 page)

It was after nine, and a beautiful warm
evening, when she walked back to the nurses’ home. She was very hungry, but
she had missed the evening meal and
would have to make do with a sandwich. She wasn’t going to dwell on the
unpleasantness with Miss Wainwright, or the repercussions it might have.

She would deal with that tomorrow.

But after several days with no reprimand
for being rude to Miss Wainwright, Mariette assumed that the older woman had decided
not to complain after all. She was just as frosty as before, but she ordered
Mariette to go back on to the wards and check with each of the soldiers to see if
they wanted any help or advice about anything.

‘Of course, it’s the
army’s responsibility really. If they were in Netley, an officer would have
already been round to see to them,’ she said airily. ‘But you can do it,
until someone else comes.’

Mariette didn’t know whether Miss
Wainwright was just giving her a job she didn’t want to do herself, or if one
of the ward sisters had suggested Mariette. But, however it came about, she was
glad. It was far more satisfying to write a letter home for a soldier who
couldn’t hold a pen than to type out reports and requisition forms. Many of
the men had questions about their future now they were seriously wounded, and
although she didn’t know the answers to their questions, she could get the
right person to come and discuss matters with them.

But the men were mostly just glad of
someone to talk to. And for men who had already had a limb amputated, it helped them
a little to hear from her how long it took to get used to a prosthetic limb, and
what it felt like.

On 12th June, there was news of a new
kind of pilotless bomb which appeared to be launched from France. People took it for
a plane at first, because it had wings. But it wasn’t
long before there were many more arriving, by night and
day, throughout the south, and targeted on London. The bombs sounded like a
motorbike, with an engine that would suddenly cut out prior to falling and
exploding. They had clearly been designed to create terror, and they did.

Two old ladies who lived together were
brought into the hospital after one of these bombs, which people were calling
‘doodlebugs’, fell into their garden and caused their bungalow to fall
down around them. Apart from many cuts and bruises – and one lady had a broken arm –
they weren’t too badly hurt, but the shock had been enough to give them a
heart attack.

‘We knew what to expect in the
Blitz,’ the older of the two said to Mariette, her voice quavering. ‘But
you hear this, then it stops, and if you are underneath it you don’t stand a
chance. What are we going to do now without anywhere to live?’

It was tough on anyone bombed out of
their house, but for the elderly it was particularly cruel to lose belongings
collected over a lifetime – especially if, like these two old ladies, they had no
money to replace anything. Mariette said she’d contact someone to help them,
but she knew priority was being given to families, so she doubted these two old
dears would get anything more than one room in a shared house.

She told Morgan her concerns about
housing when he came over to the Borough to see her. They sat on a bench outside the
nurses’ home because it was a warm evening.

‘I despair for everyone,’
Mariette sighed. ‘They will need thousands of houses to replace all the bombed
ones. And it’s going to take years to repair all those with just missing tiles
and broken windows. I can’t imagine life here after the war, it certainly
won’t be anything like it was before. Thank goodness I’ll be going
home.’

Morgan didn’t reply.

When she turned
to him, she sensed that her last remark had upset him. ‘Come with me?’
she said, taking his hand in hers. ‘I don’t want to go without
you.’

‘What would I do for a
living?’ he asked. ‘From what you’ve told me, Russell is too small
for a hospital.’

‘There is the Bay of Islands
hospital in Kawakawa, that’s not far away,’ she said. ‘Wounded
servicemen went there in the last war, and it’s been pretty busy in this one
too. It’s also a TB hospital.’

‘I doubt they’d want a male
nurse.’

‘You, Morgan, can be very
negative,’ she said lightly. ‘Do you want to stay here without
me?’

He made a gesture with his hands. She
knew exactly what he meant by it, that he wanted to be with her, but he
wouldn’t commit himself to it, not the way he was now.

‘What would your parents say about
bringing home someone like me?’ he said.

‘You spoke to them on the phone
when I first lost my leg, so you know how grateful they were to you for helping me.
They know you’ve been burned, that won’t make a scrap of difference to
them.’

‘But I’m not what they
would’ve wanted for you.’

Mariette felt herself growing angry with
him. ‘I’m sick of this! They aren’t the kind of people who go by
looks. I’m not going to ask you again, I’ll just go on my
own.’

She got up to leave, but Morgan caught
hold of her arm and pulled her back on to his knee.

‘I’m afraid,’ he
said.

‘Afraid of what?’ she asked,
exasperated with him.

‘We met when we were both perfect.
We thought it was love, but we didn’t have long enough together to be sure of
it. Then we meet up again five years later, and we’ve both got something wrong
with us. How can we be sure we aren’t just
making do because we know it’s unlikely anyone
else will want us?’

‘Making do!’ Mariette
exploded. ‘Is that what you are doing with me? Better to have an imperfect
girl on your arm, than no one?’ She jumped up from his lap so fast, she forgot
her leg and nearly fell flat on her face.

Morgan caught hold of her and pulled her
back to him. ‘I wasn’t talking about my feelings for you, but how you
might feel about me.’

Mariette looked at him in bewilderment.
‘Why do you think such things? You were the one who abandoned me. You knew I
cared for you.’

Morgan dropped his eyes from hers.
‘I behaved shamefully outside the Ritz. You were everything I wanted in a girl
– smart, sexy, beautiful – but at the same time I felt I was going to lose you
because I’d told you I could barely read or write. So I was rough with you;
that’s what I’d seen so many gypsy men do to women when they felt second
rate. If I’d been able to write better, maybe I could’ve explained how
it was. I tried to forget you; but I couldn’t. I was one mixed-up idiot,
wasn’t I?’

‘If it’s any consolation, I
wasn’t that sweet and kind then,’ Mariette admitted. ‘I liked the
way Uncle Noah lived, I wanted that kind of life for myself. I was in two minds
about meeting you that day in Trafalgar Square, because I didn’t think
you’d fit into my plans, but I couldn’t quite let you go
either.’

‘Did you ever think of me, after I
stopped writing?’

Mariette nodded. ‘A great deal. I
even thought of you while I was going out with other men. None of them ever made me
feel the way you did, and I haven’t slept with any man since you.’

Mariette wasn’t sure why she
admitted that.

‘And I
haven’t had another girl since you either,’ he said. ‘Over in
France I never got a chance. And then the fire put paid to it all.’

Mariette held his face in her two hands
and kissed him lingeringly. ‘I don’t see your burn any more,’ she
said as she broke away. ‘To me you are just Morgan, and I do love
you.’

Suddenly they heard that dreaded
motorbike sound of a doodlebug coming closer and closer to them. Morgan picked her
up in his arms and ran towards the air-raid shelter with her. As he ran, nurses came
charging out of the nurses’ home, some overtaking them. They had just got the
door of the shelter open when they heard the doodlebug’s engine cut out.

‘
In!
’ Morgan
yelled, pushing Mariette and the other nurses inside and quickly following them.

The crash as the doodlebug landed was so
loud that the ground shook. ‘The nurses’ home!’ one of the nurses
exclaimed. ‘Did everyone get out?’

Morgan struck a match and found a candle
by the door to light. There were seven nurses in the shelter. When he questioned
them about missing girls, it seemed they had either gone into town or were on
duty.

‘I think we can open the door
now,’ Morgan said, and gingerly opened it a crack to peer out.

They were all expecting billowing brick
dust, and a scene of utter devastation. But to everyone’s surprise Morgan
laughed.

‘The nurses’ home is fine.
The bomb landed on the waste ground, beside the garden. There’s a huge
crater!’

Everyone began giggling with relief.
Mariette realized she’d been holding her breath from the moment they first
heard the bomb. And there it was, at the bottom of a deep hole, a wisp of smoke
rising from it.

‘If it
had fallen on the hospital!’ one of the nurses said as they all came out of
the shelter to view it.

‘That doesn’t bear thinking
about,’ another one added.

‘Not our night to die,’
Morgan whispered in Mariette’s ear. ‘I’m really glad of that as I
have some unfinished business.’

‘What?’ she asked.

‘Come with me,’ he said,
taking her hand and leading her away from the group of nurses who were all still
staring at the deep crater the flying bomb had made.

He led her round the other side of the
hospital, through a gap in a fence and into a small wood.

It was getting dark now, and Mariette
was always nervous about walking on uneven ground in darkness as she felt she might
trip. ‘Where are you taking me?’ she asked.

‘Here,’ he said,
‘where there are no prying eyes, and hopefully no more doodlebugs.’

Mariette laughed as she realized what he
meant.

He pulled her into his arms and kissed
her. The kiss went on and on, their bodies pressing into one another’s, arms
clinging tightly. Mariette wasn’t sure if Morgan was aroused, but she
certainly was. If he chose to throw her down on the ground now and have his way with
her, she wouldn’t try to stop him.

‘My darling,’ he whispered
as he broke off. ‘I do love you, more than I ever thought I was capable of.
And I think my problem seems to have rectified itself.’

‘That’s good to hear,’
she whispered back, rubbing her nose gently against his. ‘So what are we going
to do about it?’

‘We’ll plan a weekend
away,’ he said, ‘in a hotel. We’ll do the Mr and Mrs Smith thing.
Or even Griffiths, if that appeals to you.’

‘It does,’ she said.
‘Does that mean you’ll come back to New Zealand with me?’

‘Well, I
couldn’t let you go on your own, could I?’ he laughed. ‘But
I’ve got to get back to Netley now, so we’ll plan it all next time I see
you.’

‘The next time I see
you …’ Mariette murmured the words Morgan had said that evening in the
woods, and wondered when on earth that would be.

She hadn’t seen him for weeks.
He’d sent her letters, and twice he’d managed to get her on the
telephone at the nurses’ home. But Netley was snowed under with casualties
from France, and he couldn’t get away.

‘Think of the six weeks on the
ship sailing to New Zealand,’ he’d written in one letter. ‘You
will be stuck with me morning, noon and night. You’ll be screaming to escape
me after two weeks.’

She was really busy too as the Borough
was full to capacity, not just with war casualties but with everyday things such as
people having their appendix out, giving birth, and having heart attacks too. Almost
every one of these patients had some problem they needed help with. Life went on
despite the war.

It was now early September, and there
was no doubt the Allies were winning. German generals had made an attempt on
Hitler’s life, but to everyone’s disappointment it had failed. The
Allies had taken Cherbourg, liberated Paris and freed Belgium. Over in Italy,
Florence had been captured, and the Poles in Warsaw had risen up too.

Mariette felt very relieved to hear that
both her brothers were still in Italy, and unhurt. A letter had come from them,
saying how much they were looking forward to a family reunion once the war was
over.

But although there was so much to be
optimistic about, Hitler had sent a further surprise, even worse than the
doodlebug. It was the V2 rocket. It
couldn’t be intercepted and flew faster than the speed of sound. The
destruction it could cause was enormous, and the damage to public morale was
terrible.

With rationing becoming more severe
every month, the number of people who were homeless or living under appalling
conditions growing ever larger, and the casualty lists ever longer, there
wasn’t much to be cheerful about. Sometimes, when Mariette heard of one of
these new rockets taking out fifty people or more in a single blast, she really
wondered how much more England could take.

But she had a rosy glow within from
thinking about Morgan. It really did seem plausible that, next year, they might be
home in Russell for Christmas.