Susan Mallery Fool's Gold Series Volume One: Chasing Perfect\Almost Perfect\Sister of the Bride\Finding Perfect (89 page)

Raoul's kiss.

No matter how many times she told herself he hadn't meant anything by it, she couldn't get her gut, or her heart, to believe it. That one little second of contact had changed everything. Suddenly he wasn't just Raoul, someone she knew, he was a
guy
. And because he was
a guy, she had to be careful around him, which she didn't like.

Awareness was everything, she thought grimly. Two days ago, he'd been everyone's definition of tall, dark and handsome, but she hadn't really cared. He'd witnessed her at her hysterical best, had dealt with it winningly and she'd thought of him as a friend.

Now she found herself thinking about that stupid kiss two or three hundred times a day. She'd wondered why he'd done it, wished he would do it again, imagined him doing more than kissing her. It was pathetic, not to mention a waste of time.

She didn't have a type, but if she did, it wasn't him. He was too perfect. In all her “happily ever after” fantasies, the guy in question had been normal. Maybe even boring. Boring was dependable. With boring, a girl had a shot at the guy not leaving. But Raoul? He was heartbreaker material even when he wasn't trying.

“It was just a kiss,” she whispered to herself. “Let it go.”

Good advice. And someone, somewhere, would probably take it. Just not her. Not when she could feel the light brush of skin on skin, feel the heat of him and wish…

She lightly bumped her head against the wall, hoping to gently pound some sense into herself. Maybe the problem wasn't that Raoul was not her type, maybe the problem was more generic than that. Maybe if she'd had more kissing in her life, she wouldn't feel like she had to read too much into what had happened. Maybe she should date.

Pia rolled her eyes. “Oh, please. Like
that's
going to happen.”

If she went ahead with the embryos implantation, her dating days were long over. Besides, she'd never exactly excelled in the man department. They always left, and for the life of her she couldn't figure out what she was doing to drive them away.

The door to her office pushed open. Pia glanced up and was surprised when Raoul strolled in.

He looked good, she thought, telling herself to make sure
she
looked cool and sophisticated. Barring that, she should try to avoid appearing desperate or needy.

“Hi,” she said, going for cheerful. “I haven't had an emotional crisis today so we can't possibly have an appointment.”

Instead of seeming impressed by her sparkling wit, he stared at her with an intensity that made her wonder if she'd dropped a bit of breakfast on the front of her shirt. As casually as she could, she glanced down. All seemed well.

“Pia,” he said, moving toward her. “We have to talk.”

Not exactly words one expected to hear from a macho guy. “Okay,” she said slowly. “What about?”

Maybe he'd been as rocked by the kiss as she had been. Maybe he wanted to kiss her again and make her his love monkey. A week or two of intense male attention would probably cure her allergies.

“I've been doing research on in vitro fertilization,” he said.

She plopped down on her chair and held in a sigh. So much for the love monkey invitation. “That's more than I've done,” she admitted. “Is that what we're going to talk about? Because if it's anything gross, I don't want to know. I have a weak stomach.”

He moved toward her desk. “It won't be bad. You take some basic tests, then your body is prepared to receive the embryos.”

She hadn't liked the sound of that when she'd read the brochures the lab guy had given her, and she didn't like it now. “Prepared, how?” She quickly raised a hand. “Never mind. Are you going to sit?”

He placed his hands on her desk and leaned toward her. Apparently sitting wasn't on the schedule, either.

“Pia,” he said, his dark gaze intense. “You can't go through this alone. You need someone to take care of you, and I want to be that person.”

CHAPTER SIX

T
HE WORDS SWIRLED AROUND
in Pia's head. This was even crazier than the kiss.

“I haven't decided I'm going to have the babies,” she whispered.

“Sure you have. Are you going to walk away from them?”

“No, but…”

If she hadn't been sitting, she would have collapsed. Was Raoul right? Had she already made her choice?

She closed her eyes. There was no way she
couldn't
have them, she thought with some finality. Whether or not she was the best person, she was the one Crystal had picked. It was crazy and scary and life-changing, but it had to be done. Her friend was depending on her.

She opened her eyes. “Oh, God. I'm going to get pregnant.” She sprang to her feet, as her chest tightened and her heart rate zoomed into triple digits. “I can't breathe.”

He came around the desk, took her hands in his and held on tight. “I'll help.”

“This has nothing to do with you.”

“I want to help. Be your…” He seemed to be searching for a description of what he was offering. “Pregnancy buddy. I'll drive you to the doctor, go get you pickles, whatever you need.”

“I don't need pickles,” she told him, ignoring the warm feeling of his skin against hers. This was not the time to indulge in weakness. “I don't really like them. Not enough to binge on them.” A pregnancy buddy? “Maybe you took too many hits to the head when you were playing football.”

Despite her tugging on her hands, he didn't release them.

“Pia, I'm serious. You don't have any family here. You have friends, but they all have lives. You need someone to depend on for the next nine months. I'm offering to be that guy.”

Did kissing come with the offer, she wondered, before pushing the thought away.

She managed to free her hands and take a step back. “You can't know what you're saying. Why would you give up nine months of your life to help me?”

“Why would you offer to have Crystal's babies?”

“That's different. She was my friend.”

“Fair enough. I didn't know her, but I did know Keith. These are his kids, too. The man died in my arms, Pia. I was there. I owe him. Helping bring his children into the world seems like the least I can do.”

That almost made sense, she thought. Given that everything about their conversation was beyond believable.

“Okay, maybe,” she conceded, “but maybe you could just donate something to charity instead. You're a rich, famous guy. You have a life. Probably a girlfriend.”

“I don't have a girlfriend. I wouldn't have kissed you if I did.”

Which begged the question of why he had, but she
would deal with one weird incident at a time. “Raoul, you're really sweet, but no.”

“Why? Don't you trust me?”

She frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I'm not going to offer this, then change my mind. I'm not going to leave.”

She did her best not to wince at his words. He knew enough about her past to guess that being left was one of her issues. Slowly, she returned to her chair and sank down. After drawing in a breath, she looked at him, as if she could find the answer in his handsome features.

There was nothing new there—just the same large, dark eyes, high cheekbones, perfect mouth.

He pulled up a chair and sat facing her. “I mean it, Pia. I want to help. For you and for Keith. You should let me try. I'm good at getting stuff done. All that quarterback training. What you're doing is important. Let me help.”

She might not be willing to accept a man she barely knew would do this for her, but she could almost get that he would do it for Keith.

“What does being a pregnancy buddy mean?” she asked cautiously.

“Whatever you want it to mean. Like I said, I'll drive you to the doctor, go on craving runs, listen to you talk about how your ankles are puffy.”

Something passed through his eyes—a dark, scary emotion that made her wonder about his past. But before she could ask, the emotion was gone.

“I'll be there for you, Pia. In whatever capacity you want. No expectations, no rules. You won't have to go through this alone.”

That sounded perfect, she thought wistfully, wonder
ing if it was possible. Could she really depend on him, trust him, know that he would be there for her?

Leaning on other people hadn't been a big part of her life. Not since high school, when both parents had left her—in one way or another. As she and Raoul weren't involved emotionally, the situation was completely different from what it had been with her boyfriends. If he chose to leave, it wouldn't be a big deal. Right?

Which was what it came down to. Depending on someone she wasn't sure would come through for her.

“It's an interesting idea,” she began. “And I appreciate it. But why would you do this? What's in it for you?”

“I'll be there,” he said firmly, “because I like you. And because you're doing a good thing. Maybe because there are things in my past that didn't work out the way I wanted them to, and this will make me feel better about them.”

“How do you know what I'm thinking?”

“I just do, and I'll be there.”

A part of her wanted to believe. Being able to depend on someone, especially while she was pregnant and worried about giving birth to three kids and raising them, would be heavenly. But the rest of her knew that leaving was what most people did best.

“Look at it this way,” he said. “Use me shamelessly. Then if I do walk away, you get to be right. A win-win.”

An interesting point. He sounded really sincere. Not totally sane, but sincere.

“Okay,” she said slowly. “Maybe.”

“I'll take it.” He leaned in and brushed his mouth against hers.

Again, the light kiss had her entire body reacting.
She wanted to haul him against her and have him put some back into it. Instead, she contented herself with remembering to breathe.

He stood. “Let me know when it all starts and I'll be there.”

She wasn't clear on the implantation process, but she was pretty sure it was something she didn't want him to see.

“In the waiting room,” he amended at her look of squeamishness.

“Okay. That would be fine. I'll let you know.”

He left.

She continued to sit on her chair, feeling both stunned and a little relieved. Maybe this would be for the best, she told herself. Having someone else to help. Having someone else looking out for Crystal's babies. And if he got bored or distracted and walked away, so what? She'd been abandoned in ways Raoul couldn't begin to imagine. He couldn't possibly hurt her. So she was safe. And being safe was really what mattered most.

* * *

R
AOUL TRIED TO BE UP
at camp nearly every day. He timed his visits for recess or lunch so he could spend time with the kids on the playground. It was fun to toss a ball around with them. For the most part they were a little small to throw or catch a football, but a baseball worked well and Josh's sporting goods store had donated several balls and mitts.

When he arrived, the kids were still eating lunch. He went to see Dakota.

She was one of those neat people who had trays and color-coded, arranged files. Sort of like Pia's office, but
without the huge calendar or the posters proclaiming Founders Day and Kissing Booth—$1 a kiss.

“How's it going?” he asked.

“Great.” She motioned for him to enter.

He took the chair next to her desk.

“All the classes are in place and the kids are settled. We're okay on desks, still a little short on blackboards and books. So there's some creative sharing going on. It's probably good for the students to see that life means being flexible.”

He chuckled. “Disaster as a teachable moment.”

“Sure. Why not?” She pulled out a folder and glanced through it. “We should have an estimate on the cost to repair the school by the end of the week. If you hear a collective groan about ten Friday morning, it's the school-board-and-city-council joint meeting, where they get the actual numbers. I don't think it's going to be pretty.”

“Isn't there insurance?”

“Sure, but it's unlikely to make the school whole again. I'm sure there's state money, too, but I see a lot of fundraising in our future.”

He remembered the fun Saturday afternoon in the park. “Pia puts on a good party.”

“She has a lot of experience.”

A group of yelling kids raced past her open office door. “Lunch must be over,” he said.

“Apparently.”

More kids ran by.

“Does the noise bother you?” he asked. “Do you want an office somewhere else?”

Dakota laughed. “I'm one of six. I'm used to noise.”

“Loud, happy childhood?”

“Absolutely. The boys came a couple of years apart, but when we were born, Mom got smacked with three babies at once. I can't imagine how she did it. I know my dad helped and the neighbors pitched in, but triplets? Somehow she managed.”

He thought of Pia. She would have the three embryos implanted at the same time. If all of them survived, she would be looking at triplets, as well.

“So you're used to the chaos,” he said.

“I don't even notice it. There are complications with a lot of kids, but as far as I'm concerned, the positives far outweigh the negatives.”

“Planning a big family?” he asked.

She nodded and laughed. “I should probably get started, huh?”

“Is there a guy in all this?”

“I'd prefer it that way.” She wrinkled her nose. “I know—how boring. I want to be traditional. Get married, have kids, a yard, a dog. Not anything a famous football guy would find interesting.”

“What makes you think I don't want the same thing?”

“Do you?” she asked, tilting her head as she studied him.