Suzy P and the Trouble with Three (6 page)

Danny pushes his fringe back sheepishly and smiles
the slow smile that makes my tummy flip over. Only it’s not directed at me. He’s smiling at Isabella.

Wait a minute. Exactly what’s going on here? Are they flirting?

“Uh oh. Trouble at twelve o’clock,” Jamie mutters. “Don’t all look,” he says, as we turn around.

When I do, my heart sinks.

It’s Jade and Kara.

My nemesis. Or is it nemisi, when there are two of them? I never really understood that cactus, cacti thing. Anyway, earlier this year, Danny and I broke up because of this huge misunderstanding, and Jade and Kara were at the centre of it all. They’d bet each other that Jade could go out with Danny for a month. Although they succeeded in splitting us up, we cottoned on to what they were up to and sorted everything out. Jade and Kara weren’t best pleased about the whole thing. And let’s say they’re not exactly people you want to be on the wrong side of.

Although, now I come to think of it, Isabella would probably get on really well with them. They’re much more her type than we are.

As they stalk past, the two girls shoot us dagger-glares that could kill.

“Friends of yours?” Isabella asks.

“Long story,” Jamie says.

“It’s fair to say they hate us,” Millie adds.

“But we don’t like them much, either,” I say. “They’re kind of evil.”

My phone bing-bongs with a text, and when I check the message, I see it’s from Mum.

Ugh, that woman is such a snorefest.

“We need to leave,” I say to Isabella. “I promised Mum I’d be home in time to finish my packing.”

Isabella huffs.

“I need to go too,” Millie says, looking stricken. “Oh, you guys, I can’t believe this is the last time we’re all going to hang out together for ages.”

“Look on the bright side, at least you’re getting a holiday,” Jamie says, as he sweeps Millie into a huge, enveloping hug.

Danny shuffles his feet awkwardly. He’s got a bit of a thing about displaying affection in public. He’s loads better than he used to be, but he’s still kind of weird about it, especially with someone like Isabella watching him.

“You are coming over to say goodbye tomorrow, aren’t you? Millie says. She’s clinging to Jamie like he’s her lifeboat on a sinking ship.

“Sure,” Jamie says. “But you’re not going away for that long.”

“It’s forever,” Millie wails dramatically.

“It’ll go really quickly, you’ll see,” Jamie says.

“I suppose you’re right,” Millie says, cheering up. Typical Millie. She’s never down for long.

“Bye, Suze,” Danny says. He leans over to give me a gentle kiss. His lips are soft against mine, and he tastes of mint. I realise with a pang how much I’m going to miss him until we get back.

“You will text me while we’re away?” I say.

“Course,” Danny says. “And I’ll email you. Every day. But I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He gives me a quick hug, and another kiss on the cheek, and I’m trying not to cry, because I don’t want Isabella to think I’m pathetic.

“Come on, Suze,” Millie says, swinging one arm around my shoulder, and the other around Isabella as we wave goodbye to the boys and they head off out of the other exit. “I guess it’s like Jamie said. At least we’re getting a holiday. We’re going to have a great time.”

I’m not convinced. And somehow, I don’t think Isabella is, either.

Mum wakes
everyone up at 6 a.m. with a cheery, “Holiday time!” bellowed into our bedrooms. Apparently we need to leave early to beat the traffic, and ‘make the most of the day’. Everyone’s grumpy and bleary-eyed as we head downstairs for breakfast.

“Are we all excited?” Mum says, buttering a huge stack of toast and sliding it into the middle of the table. “We just need to finish packing the car before Clare and Millie get here.”

“Where’s Amber?” Dad asks.

“Upstairs, with Mark,” Mum says. “She’ll be down in a minute.”

“And where are Millie and Clare?” Dad asks, pacing agitatedly. “They should be here already. We’re going to be late.”

“Calm down, we’ve got plenty of time,” Mum says,
then clocks Isabella screwing her nose up at the toast. “What’s the matter?”

“Do you have anything else I could eat?” she asks. “Like, maybe a croissant, or a pastry?”

“Um, no, sorry, I’m afraid not,” Mum says.

“In that case, I think I’ll just have an espresso, please,” Isabella asks, oblivious to the looks we’re all shooting her. “Where’s the coffee machine? I haven’t seen it yet.”

Mum laughs awkwardly. “Sorry, we don’t have one. You’ll have to have the instant you’ve been drinking since you got here.”

Isabella makes a face like Mum’s suggested she drink her own urine.

Mum puts the butter away and adds the cool box to the huge stack of food bags she’s packed, which are piled next to the door waiting to go into the caravan.

“Don’t they have supermarkets where we’re going?” says Dad.

“They do, but the campsite is about twenty minutes from the nearest village,” Mum explains, grabbing a jar of jam from the cupboard. She hesitates for a moment before also selecting honey, Marmite, peanut butter and marmalade.

“Is there anything actually left in the cupboards?” Dad asks, pulling open one of the cabinets. It’s empty apart from Harry’s wand.

“Hey, that’s mine,” Harry says. “I wondered where that had gone. Did you put it there?” she asks me suspiciously.

I shrug, innocently.

I totally did.

“Just how much have you packed?” Dad asks. “Everything in the kitchen?”

“It’s good to be prepared,” Mum says. “And there’s no point buying things down there when we’ve got it all here. You’re the one always banging on about saving money. Go and put the food in the caravan.”

“Clare and Millie have arrived,” Dad says, staggering under the weight of the bags. “At last. Only an hour late.”

“Sorry. Blimey, how long are we going away for?” Clare laughs, as Dad heaves the multitude of carrier bags down the path.

“Don’t ask,” Dad calls over his shoulder. “Is Martin not coming to see you off?”

Millie inhales sharply and Clare shakes her head with this weird expression on her face.

“No. We said goodbye at the house. Anything I can do?”

“Give me a hand getting the duvets off the beds and sticking them in the caravan?” Mum says. “Then I think we’re pretty much there.”

“I packed a whole case of jelly babies,” Millie tells me, patting her bag protectively. “I didn’t know if you could get them abroad.”

“Mills, we’re going to
Wales
,” I say.

“Abroad,” Millie says firmly. “We’re crossing a border and the signs are all in foreign. I’ve seen it on TV. It’s best to be on the safe side.”

Upstairs comes the sound of a loud wail, followed by sobbing.

“What’s that?” Millie asks.

“Mark. Still crying because Amber’s going away.”

Millie snorts as Mark and Amber walk into the kitchen, holding hands tightly. They’re both puffy-eyed and red-cheeked.

“God, I thought we were bad leaving the boys yesterday,” I mutter to Millie. “We’ve got nothing on these two. Hey, speaking of the boys, there they are,” I say, spotting them out of the window. They chat with Dad for a moment, then head inside.

It’s getting pretty packed in this kitchen, what with all of us and the luggage. There’s hardly any room to move.

“Danny, Danny, watch my magic trick I’ve been practising,” Harry says. My sister adores my boyfriend. Given the opportunity, she’d swap me for him in a heartbeat. She produces a pack of cards. “Pick one.”

Danny does as he’s told.

“Look at it and then put it back,” Harry says. “Don’t show me. I’ll tap the pack with my wand like this, throw them at the fridge, and your card should stick to the door…”

Harry hurls the cards at the fridge and, surprise, surprise, they all fall to the floor.

“Oh,” says Harry. “I don’t understand why it didn’t work. Was this your card?” She picks the top card off the pile and shows it to Danny hopefully.

“’Fraid not,” Danny tells her, shaking his head. “Keep practising.”

“Nobody told me that damn dog was coming.” Dad storms back inside. “Clare, what’s Murphy doing in the back of your car? Please tell me you’re dropping him off at the kennels.”

“That dog’s
massive
,” Isabella says, peering outside.

She’s not wrong. Murphy’s the size of a small horse. He’s also insane. A giant bundle of crazy mutt. Millie absolutely adores him, but the rest of us? Not so much.

The thought of him, and a tent, and small enclosed spaces… Oh good Lord.

This is never going to end well. They can’t be bringing him… Can they?

“He’s coming,” Clare confirms, and the whole
room groans in unison. “Blame Millie, not me,” she says, holding up her hands in protest. “I’d have happily left him at home.”

“Dad’s working so much and Sophie’s at summer school and I couldn’t put him in kennels,” Millie says, tears brimming in her eyes. “I just couldn’t do it to him. He’ll be fine with us, he’ll behave, I promise. I didn’t want him to be left behind and lonely…”

She lets out a huge sniff, and Dad looks alarmed. He doesn’t handle crying well at the best of times. Mark and Amber’s waterworks already have him on edge.

“Please, Mr Puttock,” Millie pleads. “Please. Pretty please. He’ll be good. Don’t make me leave him behind…”

“All right, all right, he can come,” Dad says. Millie jumps with joy, then runs over to give him a huge hug. Dad flushes as he awkwardly pats her shoulder.

“But you’ll need to keep him under control. At
all
times. I know he has a tendency to be a little, erm, wild.”

“I will,” Millie promises. “You’ll hardly know he’s there, I promise.”

“Hmm. I’ll believe it when I see it,” Dad says. “Right, can we have everyone who’s coming on this holiday in the cars, please?”

Everyone apart from Mum troops outside. She’s still busy running around, unplugging every electrical item
in sight, and checking she’s locked all of the windows about eighty times.

“Mark’s staying in the house,” Dad says in exasperation. “He can keep an eye on all this for us.”

“I know,” Mum says, “but you know what he’s like. He’s not exactly…” She peers around to make sure Mark and Amber aren’t listening. “…
reliable
.”

“I call shotgun!” Harry shouts, running to yank open the front passenger door. “See you, Danny,” she calls over her shoulder.

“So…” Danny says to me. “I guess you’re going.”

“I can’t believe you’re leaving us behind,” Jamie says miserably.

“Yeah, well, that makes two of us,” I say.

“Suzy, we’re going to have a blast,” Millie says.

“I suppose we’ll have a laugh, won’t we, Isabella?” I say, attempting to be friendly and include her in the conversation. She doesn’t even look up.

“You’ve changed your tune from yesterday,” Jamie says.

“You know we’re going to miss you,” Millie says. “But a holiday will be cool. New things to do, new people to meet…”

“You won’t talk to any boys, or anything, will you?” Danny asks nervously.

“Why?” Millie teases. “Worried something will happen?”

“No,” Danny says. “It’s just… y’know… I…” Then he shrugs and turns red with embarrassment.

“You’re going to miss us too, I know,” I say.

Danny nods his head as he shoves his hands deep into his pockets and stares at the floor. “Yeah.”

“Jen, would you
please
hurry up!” Dad shouts.

“Coming,” Mum replies, dashing out with another four carrier bags crammed with food. She carefully locks the door, then immediately reopens it, saying, “I don’t think I locked the back door…”

“You did!” everyone says.

“I want to be sure…” And off she disappears again.

Mark pulls Amber close – well, as close as he can in her current state – and then gives her a huge kiss, tongues and everything, which goes on forever. Crystal Fairybelle, squished between them, wriggles and yelps and struggles to get free.

“I’ll miss you, Markymoo,” Amber says, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I love you. So much.”

“I’ll miss you too, Ambypamby,” Mark says, equally
tear-sodden
. “And I love you too. And Crystal. And our precious babies. Look after Wolf and Rainbow for me.”

“Wolf and Rainbow?” Danny says, incredulously.

“You’re not calling the babies that, are you?” Jamie asks.

“Just trying them out,” Mark says, pulling a tissue out of his pocket and loudly blowing his nose.

“Look, you two, nobody’s dying,” Dad says. “Turn off the waterworks, hey? Mark, man up, for God’s sake.”

“But I’m not going to see my wife for such a long time,” Mark replies. “Her, or the bump, or the dog. I’m going to be without my entire family.”

“Lucky bugger,” Dad mutters. “It’s ten days. Ten! It’s not long. And those babies aren’t going anywhere. Now where’s Jen? Jen? Jen! Come on!”

Mum rushes outside. “All fine,” she says, then immediately looks worried. “I did shut the bathroom window, didn’t I?”

“Yes!” we all shout.

“Maybe I should double-check,” Mum says, but Dad grabs her arm.

“Get in the car. The house will be fine. Everyone got everything?”

Dad slams the boot shut, but not before I get a glimpse of Isabella’s designer bags nestled next to our battered cases. They look very out of place. In fact, they’re probably worth more than the car.

“You won’t work too hard, will you, Marky?” Amber says. “And you’ll ring me, every day?”

Mark nods. “And you’ll ring me too?”

He grabs Amber in another hug and leans his head onto her shoulder. He looks hilarious, leaning over with his bum sticking out to avoid her bump. The two of them stand like that, swaying softly, lost in their own dream world as Dad shakes his head in despair.

“Stop it, Chris, it’s sweet,” Mum says, swatting at him. “You’ve forgotten what it’s like to be young and in love.”

“Hmmm,” Dad says. “More like I want to get going. We’re going to hit the traffic now.”

“Bye, then,” Jamie says, pulling Millie close for a cuddle. He gives her a kiss before whispering something that makes her giggle. “Love you. See you soon,” he says. “Text me later, yeah?”

“Bye,” Danny says. “Have a good time. I’ll speak to you later.”

“Is that all I get?” I say, teasingly.

Danny clears his throat. “Um, no.” He leans forward and gives me the quickest kiss possible, turning scarlet again.

From the car, Harry wolf-whistles, and Danny goes even redder as Dad frowns out of the car window.

Sometimes I can’t believe he actually gatecrashed my sister’s wedding to dedicate a song to me in front of my entire family.

“For the love of God, we’re going on a short break, not
moving to flipping Siberia,” Dad says. “Break it up, you lot. Now.”

Danny leans in close. “Love you. I’ll miss you heaps,” he whispers in my ear, sending shivers down my back.

“I’ll miss you too,” I tell him softly, as he drops a kiss onto my forehead.

Dad hoots the horn impatiently, making us jump.

“Harry, get out of the front seat. Amber’s going to sit there,” Mum says.

“Aw, that’s not fair. I called shotgun,” Harry whines.

“Shotgun or not, that bump of Amber’s will never fit in the back. She needs all the space she can get.”

Harry reluctantly surrenders her front seat, muttering darkly while she transfers to the back, and Clare wanders over.

“How are you feeling about the towing?” Clare asks Dad.

“Absolutely fine. It’s going to be a breeze,” Dad says, not sounding entirely convinced. He glances nervously at the caravan attached to the back of our aging Volvo, which seems tiny in comparison.

“Fantastic,” Clare says. “Right, who’s going in front? Have you got satnav?”

“Satnav?” Dad scoffs. “Who needs satnav? I’ve got an excellent sense of direction. I’ve studied the maps and
know exactly where we’re going. Why don’t I go in front, because I’ll probably be a bit slower than you, and we don’t want to lose each other?”

“Sure,” says Clare, shrugging. “Whatever you want to do. Who’s coming with us? Suzy? Isabella?”

Isabella takes one look at the caravan, registers Dad’s apprehensive look, and her sense of survival clearly kicks in. “We’ll come with you,” she says.

“Do you want the front or the back seat?” I offer, kindly.

“I’ll go in the front,” Isabella says, hopping into the MPV’s passenger seat.

“Okay, I’ll get in the back with you, Mills,” I say.

Clare peers into the car. “I’m really sorry, but I’d forgotten I dumped all our stuff in the back. We’ve not got much boot space because of Murphy. I’m not sure there’s going to be enough room for both of you…”

“Couldn’t we rearrange it a bit?” I ask. “Your car’s massive. I’m sure if we jiggle some things around I’ll fit.”

“Suzy, get in, we need to leave,” Dad bellows, revving the engine.

“I’ll see you when we get there,” Millie says. “Sorry, Suze.”

Despondently, I trudge over and get into the car with the rest of my family. I’m squished in the middle between Mum and Harry.

“Ugh. It’s raining,” Harry says as we wave goodbye to Mark, Jamie and Danny.

Dad drives off nervously, the caravan snaking dangerously behind us.

Something tells me this is going to be one long journey.