Swan Song (Book Three of the Icarus Trilogy) (19 page)

“That is not the world that you want to live in.  I know this; I know that each and every one of you out there wants to live in a world of justice and equality.  As human beings we strive for the ability to live in peace.  What aggression we have comes from frustration, often in the face of being denied that equality.  And the Earth Freedom Initiative is fighting for this privilege.  Do not be confused, equality is not a right,” he said as he recalled the sorry state of the world before the revolution.

“Equality is a privilege that we have to fight for.  It is the mark of a great society when all can stand as equals and live together.  Sadly, this privilege has been taken from me.  I still live, but at a very great cost.  While I was imprisoned by the EOSF, I was tortured, my body scarred and my leg taken from me, but the worst was that their interrogator took my eyes.  I will never be able to see again in this lifetime.  I will never be able to see the smiles on my friends’ faces; I will not be able to see the pain of the people still struggling in this revolution.  I will not be able to see the day when we can finally stand free from the tyranny of the Trade Union and Jasper Montgomery,” he said, his emotion starting to interrupt some of his words.  He almost stopped then, but a fire had been lit in Douglas’ heart.

“But that is a sacrifice I would willingly give again and again, so long as humanity might retake its freedom.  I would strike out my own eyes for the chance.  And so, I come to you as a humble man, his sight taken from him, his entire world thrust into darkness.  But do not grieve for Douglas Finnegan.  It is only in the darkness that this poor soul was able to find the light.  I am a different person, now, and so I feel it is appropriate for a new identity.”

“My name is Homer.  Let me tell you a story about a thief.”

It felt odd being out in the open.  Kaspar had gotten used to walking around in his armor through these streets and ducking between shadows.  Now the sun was high among the clouds, and to all casual observers there was nothing remarkable about the average-sized man with the average hair and average clothes.

It felt like being free.

However, James was still having difficulty coping with this new existence.  He had thought it would be almost impossible to get off of Eris and now he was walking down Lavender Street with very little to care about.  He would know about the coming operation in a few hours, but Jimmy had a few hours to kill and very little to do in it.  It was the type of day for aimless shopping, but Kaspar had never had the money for that luxury.  That’s how he ended up on Eris; far too much debt for a man of his years.  The rest of his friends had turned to crime, but Jimmy tried to play it straight.  It was only a matter of time before the bank caught up with him.

So he had nothing to do and no cash to spend while walking down the sunny street.  Still, the idea of walking and breathing the polluted air of Babylon was a welcome one.  Kaspar had spent far too many days facing death and pain and misery; it was time for a quiet distraction.

He chuckled as he realized it was only quiet in relative terms.  Babylon was a bustling city, full of car horns and blaring advertisements from speakers, but when Demetri wasn’t around it was almost a serene walk through the woods.  Jimmy appreciated his friend dearly, but Urlov’s antics were a bit much for the smaller soldier to handle.  It left Kaspar little time to think on his own desires and goals.

As James walked through the commercial district he wondered what he was going to do with his life.  For now he could be a career revolutionary, but, supposing he somehow survived through the end of it all and Montgomery’s empire eroded away, Jimmy wanted a backup plan.  Even with the removal of the commercial tyrant, there would still be plenty of capitalists and money-men desperate to seize control.  Kasper wondered what role he would play in the fallout, or if he would play a role at all.  It might be nice to retire and become some sort of Nine-To-Five member of society.  Jimmy was sick of the warfare.

The thought darkened the soldier’s spirits and the sun seemed to be covered in a dull haze.  All those thoughts were based on the premise that he would make it through this revolution; make it through the operation that was going to happen in a few hours.  Kaspar had survived the Fall of Eris, but there was not much of a chance that he would make it through the entire war.  The Lions were only at half their strength; the Mastodons were down to six. 

At least most of them had made it to the planet.  Kaspar felt bad for Jenkins and the remaining Crows.  They had been destroyed by another team before they even left Eris.  He figured it must weigh heavily on the messiah figure and the stalwart old veteran by his side.  Kaspar wouldn’t have wanted to trade places with any of them.

Jimmy was about to call it a day and head back to headquarters, having had his fill of depressing thoughts, when he looked up and saw her.  Kaspar had only had a few chances at love and squandered them, but as he watched the girl smiling in the sun, the light reflecting off her black hair, James felt his chest tighten and his breath halt.  There was something present that wasn’t there before and as James stopped on the sidewalk, he couldn’t comprehend what was happening.  All he could do was watch as the young girl brushed a few strands of her jet-black hair behind her seemingly perfect ear.  James couldn’t see a single thing wrong with her, and as she continued down the street he finally noticed the color of her eyes; a dark emerald that drew him in completely.

“Why are you staring at me?”

Suddenly, James found himself in the present and realized that the young woman had walked up to him and was looking at him with skepticism.  He stammered for a bit, doing what he could to think up an excuse for gawking her as he did, but James felt a surge in his confidence.  He straightened up to his full height and looked down at the beautiful girl in front of him, secretly wondering if what he was about to say would end with him getting slapped.

“Honestly, I don’t know.  I was wandering around and trying to think up something to do for the next couple hours before an .... appointment,” he said, more than content to keep his revolutionary ties hidden.  “And when I saw you I couldn’t help myself.  I’m sorry for the staring, but after just a few seconds of seeing you I .... want to find out more about you.”

The girl looked him over while raising an eyebrow.  James felt the woman’s gaze and imagined all the criticism that she might be thinking, but eventually she looked up at his face and laughed.

“You are terrible at this,” she said, but it encouraged Jimmy to see that the ends of her mouth were curled up into a sly smile.

“I never said I wasn’t.  I haven’t had much experience talking to girls as pretty as you,” Jimmy said, smiling on the outside but cursing himself on the inside.  Kaspar had never been the most charming or most intellectual person, but he knew he had made a corny mistake.  Luckily, the young woman found the statement disarming.

“You might possibly be the most awkward man I’ve ever met,” the young woman said while shaking her head.  “And what are you, thirty?  You have a habit of hitting on girls ten years younger than you, mister?” she asked while shifting her weight to her right leg.  James was shocked at the accusation, he didn’t think he was very old, and it came through in the form of a stammer.

“Th-thirty?!  N....no!  I’m only twenty-seven and.... you’re only twenty?” Kaspar asked, not realizing how fast girls grew up these days.  He would never have assumed that the young woman was still in college or, at least, college-aged.  The girl gave a soft smile and then rolled her eyes.

“Yep, not exactly in the age range for a well-to-do man about town, am I?  It might be best for you to keep your head down, maybe head to that appointment,” the young woman said as she started to move past the revolutionary.  James was confused for a moment, but then he realized that the age difference didn’t matter.  He wasn’t as old as the numbers were painting him out to be, anyway.  He turned, followed the woman and caught up to her side.

“Look, I still don’t know your name, and I realize that it could sound pretty shallow, but after I saw you walking down the street there’s absolutely no way I’m going to let you get out of this conversation without promising to meet up with me later.”

“Hah, really?” she asked at his side, still shaking her head at Kaspar’s antics.  “What did you find so appealing about me walking down the street?  Were my hips swaying so attractively that you want to make me your third wife?  How the hell are you not being shallow right now?”

“Look,” Kaspar said as he ducked in front of her and stood in her path.  “It actually doesn’t have much to do with the way you look,” he lied, trying to find a better way for this beautiful girl to see him.  She crossed her arms and waited for him to think up an appropriate follow-up.  “It’s about the way that you were acting.  I saw you walking down the street and the way the sun hit you....”

“Ok, that’s enough,” she said while trying to move past him, but Kaspar stepped in front of her attempts.

“No, hear me out.  It was the way you smiled.  It wasn’t that you smiled; it wasn’t that you were walking down the street and I got this primal urge to make you …. my third wife.  I saw the way that you smiled and were doing what you could to enjoy the time you have; I saw the way that you’re making the most of this.  There’s a whole war, a whole bloody mess,” James said as he looked down at his feet but saw a battlefield in his mind. 

“There’s a world’s worth of injustice and suffering and so many people, so many are just giving up.  They give into Jasper and fear,” he said, unaware that he was letting on his revolutionary feelings, but the young woman wasn’t frightened by it.  She was listening intently to what the older man was saying, her breath catching in her throat.

“What I saw when you were walking down the street was a woman that hadn’t given up.  I don’t know anything about your past; I don’t know anything about what you’re trying to do with your life or why you were smiling in the first place.  But it was a bright spot in my day and a bright spot in my world when you walked down the street and I happened to see you.  And if nothing else I’m going to be eternally grateful for that, because I’ll know that maybe I can find happiness of my own.  That’s what I saw, that’s why I stared and that’s why I’m trying so hard to prove myself to you when I don’t know a thing about you.  I’ll,” he said before realizing the foolishness of what he had done.  He turned and started to walk away, his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans.  “Sorry.”

“Liz.”

James looked back at the young woman and saw her with her hands in her own pockets.  She was slightly shrugging and Kaspar could tell she was nervous.  He wondered what part of what he had said had changed her mind.

“I’m.... James,” the revolutionary said as he started to walk towards the young girl with the jet-black hair.  She brought out her left hand and motioned for him to stop.

“I’m not making any promises, James,” she said as she breathed in quickly and pursed her lips.  “But if that’s really why you were staring, I guess we can get to know each other better.”

“That’s great, I,” he started, but she repeated the stopping motion with her hand.

“I’m kinda busy now.  I’m running errands for my mom.  But how about you meet me over at Gillespie’s a couple blocks down?  Around 8?  I’ll be able to talk, then,” she said, which caused Kaspar to break out into a wide smile.

“I can.... I can totally do that,” he said, but she raised the same hand and pointed at him severely.

“No promises, Jimmy.  No funny business or anything, but I could stand to get some social life.  We’ll see what happens,” Liz said, but the only thing Kaspar could do was think about what it would be like to spend more time with her.

“That’s perfectly fine.  Ok.  I’ll see you at 8.  Umm, I gotta .... I gotta go,” James said, flustered and unable to maintain his previous confidence.  He waved awkwardly and then set down the street with his hands in his pockets.

Elizabeth watched the awkward man with the sandy hair and had to smile.  She didn’t trust him completely, but in that one instant he had seemed so genuine.  He wanted happiness or at least a chance at it.  She could understand.

She wanted exactly the same thing.

-

“Look, Teucer, I know you might not realize this, but that’s just because your puny little mind can’t understand the genius of Darrow,” the woman said over the communicator, but Norris had to shake his head at that.  He looked through his scope but found no activity, so he held his hand on his earpiece and sighed loudly.

“Puny little mind, Cass?  Are you kidding?  Just because I can’t understand the supposed depth of a fifth-wave feminist whose entire idea of mockery and social criticism is layered in passive-aggressive acts against her husband and/or father figures?  I understand it all too well,” he said as he closed his left eye to focus on the scene playing out through his scope.  “I just don’t think it’s funny.”