Sweet Harmonies (21 page)

“
No, it's no big deal,” he said, “It
was a long time ago. She was killed in a car accident, the spring
that I was 14. She was 12. That next summer was the summer I came
and stayed with Sue Ann. My parents didn't think it was healthy for
me to be knocking around the farm all alone all summer, when the
two of us had always spent our summers together. We were
inseparable. They thought it would be better for me
here.”

“
Was it?” Karina asked
gently.

Ryan shrugged again, “I guess. I mean, Sue
Ann was as sad as I was. Callie was her granddaughter. So it's not
like she cheered me up or anything. But, at least we had each
other.”

He laughed shakily, “Man, I've never talked
about this with anyone before. Do you have some sort of magical
power over me, Karina Blackstone?”

She laughed sadly and laid her head on his
shoulder. He turned and kissed the top of her head. They sat there
for a while like that, eating their ice cream cones in
companionable silence, until Karina had a thought that made the
hair on the back of her neck stand up.

She lifted her head and looked at Ryan,
“Wait, Ryan...the summer we were 14...that was the summer you came
to stay in Hope Falls, and it was the summer I was at music
camp...”

He nodded.

“
Ryan,” she said slowly, “That was the
summer I started eating my ice cream like this. I remember, because
it just popped into my head one day in the dessert line at music
camp. That exact way of phrasing it, too...that the rocky road
needed to be on top because the mint would pollute the chocolate. I
remember it specifically, because I started ordering it that way
every single night at dinner that summer, and the kids would tease
me about it. And I've never eaten my ice cream cones any other way
since then, I've never even wanted to try another way, this way
just feels so right. Do you think...I mean, I know it sounds
crazy...I mean, do you even believe in spirits, or life after
death?”

Ryan looked at her, “Do you mean, do I think
it's possible that my cousin's spirit found you, years before we
would even meet, and left an impression on you that she knew would
be meaningful to me one day?”

Karina nodded, almost reluctantly. It was
such a crazy theory.

Ryan looked thoughtful as he considered it,
and he was silent for so long that Karina almost felt compelled to
apologize for having said something so disrespectful. But when he
did speak, it was gently, “Callie did always think she knew what
was right for me. And she usually did. So, if it was possible that
she found you then, and gave you this gift, as a way of telling me
years later that YOU are what is right for me. Then yeah, I think
that sounds exactly like something she would do.”

Chapter 14

Karina could not help but feel butterflies of
anticipation as Ryan helped her out of her side of the truck and
walked her up to her front door, his manner reserved and
formal.

Ever since their little adventure in his
office, she had not been able to stop thinking about a repeat
performance. She couldn't believe it herself. It wasn't like her at
all. Of course, she wasn't a prude, far from it. But she had always
looked at sex kind of like she looked at great food – you enjoy the
hell out of it when it's put in front of you, but it's not like you
spend a ton of time obsessing about it when it's NOT right in front
of you. And, then, sometimes you get a craving. You fill it. It
goes away.

That had not been her experience with Ryan.
No sirree, Bob. She had been craving him like mad ever since the
moment they touched in his office. She was eaten up with desire for
him. Her mind would randomly fill with the image of his tongue
snaking its way into her mouth, or his hands consuming her breasts,
and all of a sudden she would be flushed and breathing hard, her
skin tingling, and her center wet and aching. Snap. Just like that.
In a flash.

That was the power that this man held over
her.

But, you know what? She was done fighting
it.

She had spent the time that they had known
each other – scratch that, WASTED the time that they had known each
other – puzzling over her intense attraction to him, when she
realized now that she should have been celebrating it.

So, in a sense, she had been right when she
told Sam that what she really needed to do was sleep with him. She
had been wrong about the result of that step, of course. He was
quite far from being out of her system. She didn't know if he'd
ever be out of her system, and she was equally unsure if she ever
wanted him out of her system.

But making love to him had opened up her eyes
where Ryan was concerned, that part was true enough. She now
realized that this crazy roller coaster ride she was on with him
was not something that she was going to be able to figure out with
logic, it was not something that she was going to be able to talk
herself out of, and most of all, it was not something to moan about
and be aggrieved over.

No. She was on a runaway horse, and the only
thing to do was to grab onto the reigns and hold on as tightly as
possible. To try to steer it, control it, was a good way to spook
it, and get thrown. No. She needed to just surrender to it, heart
and soul, and see where that took her.

Was there a chance that she could get her
heart crushed? Good Lord, yes. She couldn't deny that. But, what
kind of an artist could she claim to be if she lived life in her
secluded little ivory tower, never getting too involved, never
letting life get too messy, and keeping herself safe from the more
dangerous emotions? That was no way to live a life of passion! That
was no way to live a life worth writing about, and worth making art
about!

If she got her heart crushed, so be it. She
would write songs about it. That was what she did.

She smiled to herself. No matter. The one
thing she knew was that the possible heart stomping wouldn't be
coming tonight.

No. Tonight was just going to be some good
old-fashioned lovin' – some skin-on-skin fun of the variety that
she hadn't been able to get out of her mind for 48 solid hours.

With that thought, as her brain had been
doing with even the slightest provocation these past two days, she
had yet another mental flash of her and Ryan in the office the
other night, this one of her lying back on his desk, and of Ryan
whispering naughty nothings in her ear.

She caught her breath as her heartbeat
quickened, and this happened to be at the exact instance that she
and Ryan turned to face each other at her doorway.

His eyes flashed with concern, “Are you
okay?”

She nodded.

This didn't assuage the concern she still
read in his face, “Are you sure? You look like you've seen a
ghost.”

She didn't even bother to answer, in fact she
barely heard him. Instead, she slipped her arms around his neck and
raised her lips to his, kissing him gently and softly at first, but
quickly giving into the rising passion she felt building inside of
her.

Ryan slipped his powerful hands around her,
sliding them under her shirt so that he was encircling her bare
waist. His fingertips almost met in the back, and she loved the way
that his big, strong hands and body made her feel so fragile and
delicate in his grasp.

Karina felt the desperation in her growing,
her arousal was reaching a fever pitch. With a small hop, she
jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist, never breaking the
connection of the passionate kiss they were sharing.

She felt his hands slide down to her butt to
support her, and she used that leverage to begin grinding her hips
in rhythm against him.

She felt the vibrations of the groan that
tore from his throat before she even heard the sound, and this was
the final straw for her, it put her desire over the edge.

As she slid down his body placing her feet
back on the ground she trailed kisses down his neck. Between kisses
she heard herself pleading, “I want you Ryan. I want to feel you
against me. I want you to kiss every inch of me, and I need to kiss
every inch of you.”

The heat of Ryan’s labored breaths enveloped
her senses. She could feel the pulse in his neck throbbing against
her lips and tongue. He held her firmly against him, the delicious
pressure of his fingers gripping her hips was causing a perfect
storm of pleasure to build inside of her.

She forced herself to pull away from him,
“Let me just get the door.”

She turned and fumbled with the front door
lock, lightheadedness making her fingers thick and clumsy.

She heard Ryan take a deep breath behind her
and sensed him take a step back.

She turned to face him, “Seriously, it'll
just take a sec,” she assured him.

But what she saw in his face was neither
impatience, nor even desire anymore. What she saw was a very
disconcerting combination of regret and determination.

He sighed, “Karina, I can't go inside with
you tonight.”

She was flabbergasted, “Wait, what? Why? What
do you mean?”

He shook his head, “This isn't on the table
for me, not until our relationship is on more solid ground in the
commitment department.”

She stepped back, puzzlement drawing her
eyebrows together, “What do you mean? Sex? We already had sex. It
was already on the table,” she smirked, “Or rather, on the
desk.”

He smiled affectionately and tucked her hair
behind her ear, “And I don't regret that. It was beautiful, and I'm
glad we shared that. But it's not who I am. I want to get to know
you now. I already feel very strongly for you, I might even be
falling in love with you. I think I probably am.”

The furrow between her brows deepened, “Then
why...”

He smiled again, “Because, sweetheart. For
me, that's even MORE of an incentive to take it slow, and do things
in the right order.”

He placed a slow, gentle kiss on her forehead
– an affectionate and sweet token that, to Karina, was all the more
erotic for its pure intentions, which mirrored Ryan's own. And with
that, he turned and sauntered off down the driveway.

“
If you think that making your ass look
particularly cute as you walk away is going to torture me, you're
wrong!” she called in a teasing tone at his retreating
back.

He laughed and raised his hand in a goodbye
wave, but did not break stride or turn around. He got into his
truck and looked at her. For so long, in fact, that it finally
became awkward. Finally, he rolled down his window and called, “I'm
not leaving until I see that your cute ass is safely inside the
house, Karina!”

She smirked playfully, “Well, maybe I'll just
stand out here on my porch all night, then!”
He laughed and shook his head in exasperation, “What am I gonna do
with you, woman?”

She smiled, and called back, “Fine, then. If
you insist on being a gentleman, then I guess I can't stop
you.”

And with that, she blew him a kiss, turned
around and unlocked her front door, and stepped inside. Well, this
is a fine state, she said to herself. My legs feel like jelly, I
can't catch my breath, and I definitely can't seem to get rid of
this persistent throbbing down under. Is there such a thing as
female blue balls?

She leaned her back against the inside of the
front door and slowly slid down, until she hit the floor. Then,
sitting on her entryway floor with her legs splayed out in front of
her, she began to slowly and methodically bang her head lightly
against the front door. It truly felt like a metaphor for her
situation.

At that moment, she felt the door shake
against her back and heard an insistent pounding.

She smiled wickedly. I knew it, she crowed
victoriously to herself, I knew he couldn't stay away.

She scrambled up, brushed herself off and
patted her hair into place, and flung open the door.

“
Miss me?” she cried out with a wide
smile.

“
Kind of,” replied Sam, shrugging as
she walked past Karina into the house, “It's only been a few
hours.”

Karina's shoulders drooped.

“
Great, thanks” she said
despondently.

“
Well, don't take it that hard. I did
say KIND OF,” Sam replied.

Karina sighed, “It’s not that. So what, were
you like, watching my front door in order to sprint over here the
minute he left?”

Sam smiled wickedly, “Affirmative. I got a
nice little show, too. Your moves were bordering on acrobatic.”

Karina laughed, “Dance training, my friend.
So, I suppose you came over here to get the lowdown on how the date
went.”

Sam shook her head, “Nope. I mean, don't get
me wrong, I do want the play by play, just not right now. I came
over here because you weren't answering your phone, and I've been
calling you for hours.”

“
I was on a date.”

“
Right, well, you weren't answering
your phone.”

“
We've established that. Why were you
trying to reach me, anyway? I thought that the only
discussion-worthy occurrence around here was my dating life, and
since I was actually on the date at the time, what could there be
to discuss?”

Sam pulled her smart phone out of the back
pocket of her jeans and shoved it in Karina's face.

“
Have you seen this?” Sam
demanded.

Karina's eyes crossed, attempting to focus on
the screen, which Sam was holding mere millimeters from her
nose.

“
I can't even see it now,” Karina
replied, pulling Sam's hand and the phone it carried a reasonable
distance away from her face and attempting to focus on
it.

Sam snatched her hand back, just as Karina's
view of the small screen had unblurred itself.