Sweet Obsession (Men of Whiskey Row Book 1) (34 page)

“Not like this, Sidra,” Jack spoke in a voice thick with emotion. “And not for a very long time.”

***

After brunch, Jack took Noelle for a drive while everyone else lounged around watching the NBA Finals. Before leaving, he asked Avery if she could help him cut some flowers and fancy them up. In her element, Avery grabbed the pruning kit that she traveled with at all times; because everybody should carry one on their person she insisted when they all looked at her like she was crazy and followed him. The bouquet she composed was stunning and colorful. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon and the weather was perfect for a drive.
Sundays are definitely for lovers,
Noelle thought, just happy to be with him as he grabbed her hand and wove their fingers together. She admired the way their complexions seemed to blend together seamlessly.

“I just want to say thank you very much for the wonderful meal again,” Jack said glancing over at her. The lower half of his face was now completely covered in scruff and his black hair was curling up all over his head. He was so beautiful to Noelle in the afternoon light, that for a moment, she forgot to breathe. His gaze quickly turned to concern. “You’re not still weirded out about the chicken thing are you?”

“Ummm…no. Well yeah, okay that
was
kind of…different, but I wasn’t thinking about that just now,” Noelle said, a little flustered to be caught gawking like a groupie. Even though he was hers for the time being, it was ridiculous how thirsty she still was for him. Jack grinned, and his white teeth were a startling contrast to the black beard and deep tan he now sported.
I want to have babies with this man really bad,
she mused.

“What were you thinking about then? Penny for your thoughts, sugar,” he said warmly and brought their linked hands up to kiss her fingers. He opened her palm and gave the center a lingering kiss and she crossed her legs tightly at the feel of his soft lips on her skin, certain that if she didn’t control herself she would jump all over his ass.

“I was just thinking about what a great time I’m having here and how I’m am really going to miss it when we leave tomorrow.” As Noelle said the words out loud, she realized it was true. She’d really grown to love the mountain town of Whiskey Row; the fresh air and the nice people she’d met, and wished things were permanent between them so she could visit more often. But the thought of being in Jack’s hometown when they were no longer an item was incredibly painful. When they were done, it was best that she walk away and leave everything in the past. “Why’d you stay away so long?”

Jack didn’t say anything as he made a left turn and pulled the car over. Noelle glanced over to her right and saw a cemetery. “I think it is better I show you, so that you have a better understanding.”

He got out, grabbed the flowers, and came around to open her door, helping her out also. His chivalry was just one of the many things Noelle loved about him. Silently they walked through the cemetery, being respectful of those eternally resting. The many cemetery rows were arranged from smallest to largest tombstones. Jack grabbed Noelle’s hand as they reached the back row and stood before a large granite heart shaped tombstone. It read:

Here lies Moira Aileen Sullivan,

Beloved mother to Jackson, Darby and Casey.

May you rest in eternal peace.

You are gone but never forgotten for

death leaves a heartache no one can heal,

while love leaves a memory no one can steal.

Underneath were her birth and death years; and as Noelle looked at the dates, she realized how young the boys were when they lost their mother. Jack cleared his throat and lovingly touched the heart, before stepping forward and speaking. Noelle was surprised to hear his deep, southern voice slip into an Irish accent.

“Hello, Ma. It’s been awhile since I’ve come to visit ya’ and for that I’m sorry, truly I am. I hope you’re not that mad, ‘cause I’ve brought me beautiful wife Noelle with me. You’d really like her. She’s smart, funny, kind, and makes chicken just like you, Ma. It took me back today, and I almost started bawling like a babe and so did the
boyos
. Even Alexei was caught up in the moment. I wish you coulda seen him shoveling it into his mouth! You know me and the other two haven’t eaten it since you’ve been gone. Could never find it just the way you made it.” Jack took a deep breath, struggling for control; and when he spoke again, Noelle could hear the thickness of the tears he was trying to hold in. “She made it just right too, so crisp and juicy, my wife did. It’s time for me to tell her our story. So that she kinna better understand. Dinna fash yourself, I won’t tell her how you used to twist our ears.”

Jack gave a raspy chuckle and leaned over to kiss the heart, lips lingering. “Well, that’s it for now; I just wanted to come pay my respects to my best Galway girl before we leave ‘The Row’. I know I was a real shite not to visit sooner.
Mo ghrá, go deo agus i gcónaí ag
(My love forever and always).
Until next time, Ma.”

Tears flowed freely down Jack’s face and he made no effort to wipe them away as he placed the huge bouquet below the headstone. It was a cleansing process for him to be able to talk to her after so many years of silence. For so long, the pain of losing her had been a gaping hole in his chest that all the therapy in the world wouldn’t fill. The regrets of not being able to do more to help her made him the man that he was today. Noelle came to rest her head on his shoulder and slip her arm around his waist. Gently her fingers wiped away his tears. Together they stood like that under the warm sunshine until he was able to compose himself and lead her away. Before going, she pulled away to kiss the granite heart as well. “It was a pleasure to meet you, Ma. Don’t worry, I’ll look after your boys.”

Chapter Twenty-Six

The drive back to the house was a quiet one. Jack was deep in his thoughts, and Noelle was hesitant to disturb him. They arrived to find a note from Darby; everyone had gone over to Holt’s for a game of Bocce, and they were welcome to join them. The silence was driving Noelle crazy so she decided to keep busy by making them cappuccinos.

When she was done, she placed them on a tray and brought them to the living room, where Jack was staring pensively out the window. She sensed he needed time to get his words together and sat down on the sofa, patiently waiting for him. Finally, he came over and sat next to her on the couch. He spoke, keeping his head down and focusing on his hands.

“My father Patrick Sullivan was nothing more than a sperm donor. He was a monster that death was too good for. He’s buried at the top of Devil’s Hill, and I personally named it after him. My mother was a beautiful young woman from Galway, Ireland. She came to the states to attend the Catholic University of America in Washington D.C. where her father’s childhood friend was a professor. She lived with him and his wife while attending classes there. She was at university for two years before she met Patrick and Ian in study hall. All three hit it off immediately.

“Her family disapproved of my mother having any male friends, and her guardian gave my mother an ultimatum, which if you’re Irish, you know is the equivalent to raising a flag in front of a bull. The ultimatum was that she discontinued her friendship with her male friend or risk being sent back to Ireland; so Patrick and Ian helped my mother get financial aid and become a U.S. citizen. Next Patrick helped her to get a place to stay. The smooth bastard introduced her to an ex-girlfriend who needed a roommate, and then he charmed himself into Ma’s bed,” Jack said bitterly and clenched his fists.

“My parents were inseparable, and her family desperately tried to get her to go back to her guardian’s house, but she wouldn’t hear of it. To hear Ian tell it, Patrick wanted to spend all his time with Ma, and his grades started to suffer.” His hard tone turned to one of pride. “Not Ma’s though; she thrived in the academic environment, and her success started to put a strain on their relationship. When he started to lash out at her verbally, she finally decided to distance herself from him, and moved in with Ian’s family.” Jack looked down at his hands.

“Patrick got kicked out of school due to his poor grades, so he went home to Whiskey Row and his wealthy grandfather. Four weeks later Ma found out she was pregnant.  She went to see him despite her family and Ian’s protests, and he promptly proposed despite his grandfather’s objections. Determined to do right by her child, she said yes.”

Noelle’s stomach was doing somersaults as she waited for Jack to finish. Her heart was aching for him; he looked physically ill and sweat was beading his forehead. “So they got married, and her family disowned her. I was born seven months later. Darby arrived a year and a half after that, and school was now just a memory for her. By then, Patrick had started to show his true colors of being an angry, abusive piece of shit, and my mother knew the truth about him.” Jack looked away towards the windows, his hands shaking slightly, so Noelle grabbed one and held on tight, letting him know she there for him. He took a steadying breath before continuing.

“See, Patrick’s parents were killed in a car crash when he was two. He lived with his paternal grandfather who sent his only grandson away to school because he was such an embarrassment to the family name, just like his older sister who ran off when she was fourteen. Patrick had an alcohol problem that was discovered when he was fifteen, and there were rumors of him sexually assaulting several girls in Gatlinburg by the time he was seventeen. When he came back home after being kicked out of school, his grandfather gave him a job in the family mill as an accountant and let him live in the guesthouse. Then my Ma showed up with me in her belly. Old man Sullivan was so livid that he’d gotten some little immigrant pregnant, he immediately disowned Patrick.

Patrick got a job as a bank teller but lost it due to his temper that he couldn’t control. After that, he had trouble keeping any job. My Ma got a job as a waitress and then took in miners’ laundry on Fridays when they came down the mountain on the weekends. She supported our family singlehandedly while Patrick drowned his sorrows in bottle after bottle of whatever liquor he could get his hands on and refused to help support his family. Ma was too proud to turn to her family or Ian for assistance.”

Jack stopped again; and his expression this time was so enraged, that for a moment, Noelle felt a fission of alarm run through her body. He looked like he wanted to hurt something or someone, but at the same time, he looked like a scared little boy. Bending his head, he rubbed his face in frustration and tried to control himself. Noelle grabbed his face and made him stare at her until his eyes became focused. “Breathe, Jack! It’s okay; I’ve got you.”

Jack’s smile was ugly as he talked about the father he loathed. “No, you need to know. My father Patrick Sullivan was such a stellar human being that instead of getting sober for his family and helping to support us, he began to accuse my Ma of having affairs with the men whose laundry she took in. First the abuse was verbal, but escalated quickly into physical where no one could see, because even though he’d been disowned, Sullivan’s didn’t do things like that. His moods shifted from blaming her for the life he had to raging that she belonged to him. His sick jealousy knew no bounds, and he eventually started to take his abuse out on Darby and me even though Ma tried to protect us as best as she could.”

“The first couple of years in public, we were the perfect family- scrubbed clean and attending mass on Sunday, but it was a different story behind closed doors. My Ma refused to sleep with Patrick, so he then began raping her. When she found out she was pregnant again, she went to an OBGYN in Nashville to take care of the problem. It was there that she met Vivienne. They hit it off immediately in the waiting room, and my mother ended up confiding to her the real reason that she was there. Then Viv’s boyfriend came in to pick her up, and he was none other than Alexei Romankov.

Needless to say, my mother was scared of word getting back to Patrick, so she didn’t have an abortion. Instead, she went to old man Sullivan and blackmailed him. She told him she’d continue to keep quiet about his grandson’s behavior if he gave her enough money to open a laundromat. They struck a deal, and it became one of the most successful businesses in town. For once we didn’t have to struggle, and Ma could finally breathe easier. Seeing how much she didn’t need Patrick loosened the lock on his ugliness, and he became the town embarrassment, ranting and raving for everyone to see his craziness.

“I was thirteen when my mother decided to put her plans to leave him in motion. She started to stash money away and slowly bring our stuff to the laundromat. Viv would box things up for her and pack them away in a truck that she kept at her home; but they had to be very discreet about it because I’m ashamed to say, Patrick Sullivan was also a big, racist asshole who refused to interact with anyone who wasn’t white.” Jack felt Noelle’s sharp gaze on him, but refused to look at her as he revealed his shameful past. “He felt that affirmative action was the reason he couldn’t get a job, not because he was a lazy- ass drunk who felt he was better than everybody else.”