Authors: Kayla Dawn Thomas
“I wasn’t perfect,” Chanel said wishing she’d just gone along with her aunt’s theory about teenage girls. In reality, Chanel’s shyness and drive to help at the ranch had kept her from pursuing her crushes or getting absorbed in high school drama. Which was one more reason why this whole Maddox thing was making her crazy. Chanel didn’t do drama, and Maddox Warren lived in a constant state of it.
Her aunt’s house was quickly emptying. Christine’s life had been dedicated to raising her children, and Chanel could only imagine how she felt as her purpose marched out the front door. No wonder she’d taken up with Fritz. Was there more to the affair than just easing the pain of loneliness?
Chanel pressed her lips into a thin line and took a deep inhale through her nose, looking for the courage to ask her aunt about Fritz. The ranch wasn’t that big of a place. They couldn’t keep their relationship a secret forever. She’d been onto it almost as soon as she’d come home.
“So, what’s going on with you and Fritz?” Chanel held her breath and heard the splat of an egg hitting the old wood floor.
“What do you mean?” Christine asked as she tore a paper towel from the roll mounted below the cabinets.
She’d waded in too deep to go back now, so Chanel forged ahead. “I saw him leaving here my first Sunday home. I heard you guys in the cook tent at the branding.”
Christine’s cheeks were flaming as she threw the broken egg in the trash and hurried across the kitchen to the sink to wash her hands. Chanel stepped to the side to give her room.
Finally, the older woman met her eyes, twisting a towel in her hands. “It just sorta happened. He ran across me one day last fall when I was on a walk. Jessi had just gone back to school. David and I’d argued the night before. God, it was humiliating. I was crying my eyes out. He stopped the four-wheeler to say hi. Next thing I knew, I was blubbering into his shirt.”
Chanel’s stomach did a little somersault. This sounded like a romance novel.
Christine continued. “He started coming by for lunch on days when they were working close to home. One thing led to another.” She blushed again and ran a hand through her short blonde hair. “It’d been a long time.”
A giggle escaped Chanel’s lips. Way to be mature, she thought.
Christine whacked her with the towel. “I shouldn’t have told you.”
“Sorry,” Chanel laughed. She sucked in her cheeks making a fish face in an attempt to compose herself.
“It feels good to tell someone, though. I haven’t felt this way since Gerald died, but I know David would be furious, and I’m not sure how your dad would feel.”
“I think Dad would be happy for you. And, David, well, he’s been a jerk for years. He has no right to dictate who people can fall in love with.” She was sick of everyone tiptoeing around her cousin. The world didn’t revolve around him.
Christine shrugged and grabbed a dishrag from the sink and began furiously scrubbing the counter. “He’s protective of me. He became a man too soon with Gerald’s death.” She hesitated a moment before saying, “David caught your father and I kissing when he was fourteen.”
Chanel’s knees buckled, but she caught herself on the counter with her hands. A wave of nausea swept through her stomach, and she made her way over to the kitchen table and pulled out a chair.
“I shouldn’t have told you that either,” Christine said quickly.
Chanel waved her off. There was nothing for anyone to be ashamed of. Gerald had been gone for a long time at that point, her mother two years. Mathematically, it was appropriate for Mitch and Christine to explore something together.
“It never went anywhere, honey. It wasn’t a good fit, and you kids were all so young still. David never really forgave your father.”
So many things made sense now, except for one thing. “If he’s still bent out of shape, why does he stick around?”
“Like you, he’s a stakeholder in the ranch. He loves it, and I don’t think he hates your father. Otherwise he couldn’t work for him like he does. But, he’s making noises about trying to buy his share from your dad, start his own thing. That’s what we fought about last fall. Thankfully, he let it drop, but I’m sure it’s just temporary.”
Chanel chewed her lip. There was no way her father would sell part of the ranch. He’d buy David out first, and the whole affair would be ugly. Christine squatted beside Chanel’s chair and wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. Chanel rested her head on her aunt’s shoulder and sighed.
“We’re not thinking about this today. Seth’s coming home, and for today, everything is just right,” Christine said.
Chanel closed her eyes, and it was her tenth birthday. Her mother was in Boise for her last chemo treatment. That year Margo had lost her hair before it could get its beautiful summer streaks. It had been a tradition for Chanel and her mother to drive to Boise to shop for her birthday present and have lunch at a fancy restaurant. Chanel always drank a Shirley Temple from a pretty glass. Margo indulged in a glass of champagne. She’d tell Chanel about the time her grandmother took her to New York. Chanel never tired of the story. There wasn’t a birthday trip to Boise that year, though. Chanel was staying with Christine and her cousins, and she wasn’t happy about it. She’d swung back and forth between anger and heartbreak—she knew the chemo wasn’t doing its job. She was angry that the cancer was stealing her special day, and she was terrified of her mother dying.
Christine found her sitting in the backyard watching the other kids play with the frogs along the creek bank. It was a rarity for Chanel not to be in the middle of the action. Her aunt had pulled her into her lap and squeezed her skinny body tight. “I know you’re scared and angry, but your mom wouldn’t want you thinking about her sickness today. There are a lot of hard things going on, but we aren’t going to think about them today. It’s your birthday, the sun is shining, and everything is just right. I’ve got a strawberry rhubarb pie in the oven, and David’s Super Soaker is on the back porch.”
Despite her pain, Chanel hugged her aunt, breathing in her sweet smell and allowed herself to let go for the afternoon. She’d nabbed that giant squirt gun and made a sneak attack on her distracted cousins. A giant water fight ensued, and for a few hours, Chanel had been a carefree kid. Looking back she was grateful to her aunt for giving her that simple afternoon. It turned out to be the last one for a long time.
A blaring horn startled the two women and set the dogs to barking. They looked at each other and grinned. There was only one person who would make a noisy entrance like that. Unable to help herself, Chanel squealed and raced out the back door. She hit the driveway just as the driver’s door of an ancient Subaru slammed shut.
Seth Eber beamed and held his arms open wide. Chanel sprinted into his embrace, and he lifted and spun her around twice before setting her flip-flops back in the gravel.
“I thought you’d never get here,” Chanel said still gripping her cousin’s arm.
Seth patted the peeling car affectionately, “Minnie can only go so fast these days. Gotta take it easy on her.”
“Seth!” Christine cried as she hustled up to the pair. Seth picked up his mother and spun her around just like Chanel.
“Hey, Mom!”
Seth resembled his brother with his medium brown hair—though he wore it longer—and their mother’s brown eyes. His build was slighter, where David was more robust like their father. He may have been smaller, but he was quick and athletic. Though he was a city dweller these days, he clung to his rural roots, spending plenty of time hiking and rock climbing.
After setting his mother on the ground, Seth gave each of the dogs a good rub and then reached into his car and grabbed a backpack and a duffle bag. Chanel noted the wagon was stuffed to the gills.
“Looks like your whole apartment is in there,” Chanel said.
“It is. I’ll be glad when I’m not changing residences every year,” Seth replied as they headed for the house.
“You’re moving? I thought you liked your place,” Chanel said stopping him with a hand on his arm. Christine paused with them, searching her son’s face.
Seth sighed, looking down at the luggage in his hands. “I needed a change. I’ll find something new when I go back in August.”
Chanel’s breath caught at his words. She couldn’t have heard him right. Last she’d heard, he was only staying for a few weeks.
“You’re staying the whole summer?” Christine asked, her face mirroring what Chanel felt inside.
Seth grinned at his mother and nodded.
“That’s wonderful news!” Christine pulled him into another hug, bags and all.
Chanel met Seth’s eyes over Christine’s shoulder and knew there was more to the story, but she’d have to get him alone before she heard it.
When they entered the kitchen, Seth spotted the cocoa powder and shredded coconut on the counter and let out a whoop. “Man I’ve missed your cake, Mom.”
“Is that all you missed?” Christine swatted her son lightly on the back of his head.
“No, I’ve missed everything.”
The three were silent for a beat before Chanel tugged on Seth’s backpack strap. “C’mon, go dump this stuff, so we can go for a ride before dinner.” She caught herself and looked over at Christine, “Unless you still need my help.”
“No, no, I’ve got things under control here. Just make sure you’re back by seven.”
***
Not wanting to lose time fussing with saddles, Chanel and Seth left the barn bareback, Chanel’s flip-flops dangling from her naked toes.
“This’ll hurt in the morning,” Seth said adjusting himself on the horse’s back, making Chanel laugh.
“It’s good for you to toughen up a little.”
Finally finding a more comfortable position behind his horse’s withers, Seth said, “Ah, that’s better. Okay, time to dish on the new guy.”
“Summer help,” Chanel corrected. “He’s not coming back.”
Seth shrugged and sidled his horse beside a metal gate leading to the meadow and released the latch.
“He’s screwing Lila Biggs.”
“Who isn’t besides me and you?”
“Seth, be serious.” Chanel rode Vivi through the gate, and Seth swung it shut behind them.
“I am. Why do you care who he’s sleeping with?”
“That’s exactly what Bert said. I’d hoped you’d be on my side.”
“We are on your side. You’re just all over the place and being very unreasonable. What do you want from this guy? He pisses you off when he kisses you, and you’re furious when he finds someone else.”
Chanel had no response, so she kicked Vivi into a canter and took off toward the pond in the distance. She heard her cousin’s groan when he realized he’d have to keep up. Riding bareback wasn’t difficult; in fact, Chanel preferred it to using a saddle. She liked being able to feel her horse move beneath her. It was like they were one unit. She also knew guys weren’t always keen on it, which was why she chose to bounce Seth around a little bit.
When they reached the edge of the pond, Chanel slowed Vivi and allowed her to wade in a ways to get a drink. Seth and his horse followed. Not wanting to talk about Maddox anymore, she turned the tables on Seth.
“Did you talk to Von before you left town?”
Seth sighed and ran a hand over his face. “Yeah.”
“And?”
“He moved across the country. Transferred to a school in North Carolina. I didn’t realize he needed that much space.”
“I’m sorry.” Von and Seth had been a couple for the last two years. Chanel’s heart broke for her cousin. “That explains giving up your apartment, I guess.”
He nodded as he stroked the chestnut horse’s glossy neck. “I picked it out with us in mind, had always envisioned us living there together. When I realized that wasn’t going to happen, I cut it loose. There’s no way I could live there knowing he wasn’t coming back. But, there are lots of places in Eugene. I’ll find something when I get back.”
They sat in silence for a couple of minutes before Chanel heard Seth suck in a deep breath and let it out with a whoosh. “But, whatever. It is what it is.”
Chanel studied her cousin. Despite the pain in his eyes, he sat tall on the horse. Of the two of them, he was the romantic, the dreamer. At the moment he sounded a lot like her, and it broke her heart.
“I don’t want to think about him while I’m here,” Seth said.
“Then we won’t talk about him. It’ll just be us like when we were kids. Doing our thing in our own great big world.” Chanel stretched her arms wide to indicate the mountains and trees surrounding them.
“Sounds perfect.”
It did. Too bad her problem was right smack in the middle of their private world.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The crew was scrubbed and sipping beer in lawn chairs around Christine’s backyard by seven thirty that evening. Everyone had given Seth a warm welcome, even Maddox, much to Chanel’s relief. In fact, the two had taken to each other and had been talking football for the last half hour. Feeling left out, she reminded herself Seth would be around for the next two months. Jessi hung close to the two guys. Chanel couldn’t decide if it was because she missed her brother, or if it was an excuse to be near Maddox. David’s absence was obvious, but no one mentioned it.
“Chanel, can you help me haul things out to the table?” Christine called from the kitchen.
Chanel hopped out of her chair and headed for the back door. Fritz was on her heels. When she threw him a questioning look, he gave her a sheepish grin that lifted his handlebar mustache halfway up his cheeks and shrugged. “Extra set of hands never hurt anything.”
Chanel kept a sharp eye on his hands when they reached the kitchen and bit her lip as one skimmed over her aunt’s rear end. Christine responded to his touch with a soft giggle. It warmed Chanel’s heart. No one deserved happiness as much as Christine. Chanel grabbed the giant bowl of potato salad and headed back out the door to give them a moment of privacy. She met her father headed for the back porch and blocked his way.