“I like your shirt,” he said. Beneath her partially zipped
black hoodie, the tight gray T-shirt fit snugly across her amazingly full
breasts—reason enough for the compliment—and the picture on it made him grin. It
showed a C-130U Spooky II firing its 105 mm Howitzer with the words
You
can
run
,
but
you’ll
only
die
tired
. True enough, he thought with a surge of
admiration. That aircraft was damned amazing, and so was she, except for the
too-uptight thing.
Man, he’d give anything for a chance to unravel her. A
smoldering sensuality lay beneath that cool exterior. Many times over the past
few weeks he’d imagined her beneath him, those dark eyes glazed with pleasure as
he surged in and out of her. The mutual attraction was there. He just hadn’t
found a way to capitalize on it yet.
“Thank you.” She sipped at her coffee and took a nibble of what
looked like a bran muffin. Probably because she hadn’t eaten very much before
he’d joined her earlier in the chow hall. Casting a quick, uncertain look at
him, she focused on Cam instead and offered a soft smile. “How’s Dev? I haven’t
talked to her in over a week.”
Cam gestured for Ryan to go ahead in line before he stepped
aside to answer. “Great, thanks.”
Ryan reluctantly moved up with Jackson to order coffee for him
and Cam, listening with half an ear while Cam outlined Dev’s progress with rehab
and how long it would be before Cam got back stateside to see her.
“What about you?” Cam finished. “How long you have left for
this deployment?”
“Sixteen weeks.” She chuckled. “Not that I’m counting or
anything. You guys been out a lot lately?”
“Always.”
Ryan watched her covertly. The shadows under her eyes seemed
even darker today. And maybe she was a bit pale, too. Gunship crews were
generally out all night on patrol and slept during the day, routinely working
twelve- to sixteen-hour shifts. Not only was she not sleeping now, she was
getting coffee, and he’d lay money on it not being decaf. Why was that? She was
the most conscientious pilot he’d ever met. And given her discipline, it didn’t
make sense that she wouldn’t at least be trying to get a solid day’s sleep.
When he got back to base after operations he usually crashed
the whole next day. Granted, he was often out in the field for days at a time,
but still. He didn’t like the thought of her being tired. Fatigue could dull a
person’s reflexes and decision-making ability. Not a good thing for a
front-seater, especially when they were deep in enemy territory and under threat
of taking hostile fire.
Moving closer, he eyed her steaming cup, waiting for a break in
the conversation. “Is that decaf?”
“No.” This time her tone held the edge of a bite, so he let it
go.
She went back to her conversation with Cam, effectively
dismissing him. She knew he was watching though. Every so often her eyes would
dart his way, and she would shift her stance slightly as though she was nervous.
He was convinced she had absolutely no clue how sexy she was. That was
attractive in itself.
Jackson returned a minute later with their coffees and a
paper.
“Thanks,” Ryan said, inhaling the scent of rich, dark roast.
Since Candace’s attention was captured elsewhere, he glanced at the headline
splashed across the page, letting out a snort of disdain when he saw the
headline and picture of Virginia’s Democratic senator giving a speech. “Another
senator arguing against the war in Afghanistan, wanting to pull the troops out
of a ‘losing situation’? Gotta love the politicians.”
“Yeah, but at least this guy knows what he’s talking about,”
Jackson said.
“How’s that?” Anyone wanting to pull them out before the war
was won needed his head examined and a strip of duct tape slapped across his
mouth, high-ranking political official or not. The damn politicians back home
had to decide once and for all if the conflicts they were contemplating were
worth American lives. If not, don’t send him and his fellow servicemen into
battle in the first place. If so, back off and let them get the job done.
Period.
The paper crinkled as Jackson opened it further. “He was a
lifer in the Air Force.”
Ryan was unimpressed. “Yeah, doing what?” Probably
administration or something.
“Says here he was a jet jock.”
Didn’t mean anything. “See any action?”
“Yep. Vietnam and the Gulf War.”
Ryan’s respect for him grudgingly rose a fraction, but he still
didn’t like the man’s politics. Politicians did a lot more harm than good, and
that went double for decisions they made about the military.
“Apparently his kid’s in the Air Force now,” Jackson added,
scanning the article.
He grunted. “Yeah, probably some desk jockey back in D.C. who’s
never left CONUS because his daddy arranged it that way.”
“Why do you automatically assume it’s a son?”
Ryan jerked his head around to meet Candace’s stare, not
realizing she’d been listening, let alone standing behind him. Her dark eyes
flashed with irritation, something he was coming to realize was her default
expression around him, and after a moment he dipped his head in acknowledgement.
“Okay then, because
her
daddy arranged it.”
“God, you are
so
arrogant.”
She wasn’t the first to say so, though it bothered him she saw
him that way because he got the impression he was fast becoming one of her least
favorite people on base. Not the role he wanted. He held up a hand in
self-defense, ready to lay it all out so she couldn’t misinterpret his
standpoint. “Hey, no disrespect to you, because you’re over here putting it all
on the line with the rest of us. I’ve already told you how much I admire your
guts and capability. I wouldn’t be standing here right now if it weren’t for you
and your crew, and I’m the first to admit it.” How could she not realize how
much he admired her? After a heartbeat of surprised silence, her dark gaze
lowered to her coffee cup and her cheeks turned a soft pink. What, he couldn’t
even give her a sincere compliment without making her uncomfortable? She was
unlike any woman he’d ever met. The light scattering of freckles across the
bridge of her straight nose made her look adorable. And way too innocent for the
things he did to her in his fantasies.
“You shouldn’t judge someone just because that person seems to
have different beliefs than you,” she said quietly. “That’s how wars start.” She
had a knack for making him feel like a second grader being scolded by his
teacher. His really built,
hot
teacher, but
still.
Trying to come up with a response, Ryan had the awful sense he
was waist deep in quicksand and sinking fast. He looked at Jackson for a show of
support, but the quiet PJ kept his nose pointedly buried in the paper. Cam
merely watched him with his brows raised in amusement.
Yeah
,
Went
, his laughing blue eyes said.
Talk
yourself
out
of
that
one
.
When he looked back at her, Candace was still spearing him with
that intense gaze. He let out a deprecating half chuckle. “Okay, I think I know
where you’re going with this. You believe he has the right to free speech, et
cetera, et cetera, and that we’re over here defending his Constitutional
rights?”
One golden brow arched upward. “Something like that, yeah.”
“Fair enough.” Much as he liked sparring with her, he didn’t
want to piss her off to the point that she avoided him completely. That wouldn’t
be any fun and it wouldn’t get him any closer to her. Because he wanted to get
much closer. He nodded at her coffee, which she’d already polished off. “Can I
get you another one? Maybe a decaf this time so you can sleep?”
Inexplicably, the flush in her cheeks deepened. “I can take
care of myself, thanks.”
“Whoa, I never meant otherwise.” Jesus, she really
did
think he was an asshole.
Cam coughed and looked pointedly elsewhere. Jackson seemed to
be hiding a wince behind his paper. Ryan rubbed the back of his neck, again
struggling with the feeling he was about to go under and neither of his buddies
were coming to his aid. Pretty bad when a couple of Pararescuemen wouldn’t lift
a finger to help him.
Before he could figure out what the hell to say to diffuse her
annoyance, she squared her shoulders and stepped past him. “I’d better get
going. Excuse me.” She didn’t look at him but nodded at Cam. “See you later.
Tell Dev I send my love.”
“Will do. Take care of yourself,” Cam answered, shooting Ryan a
you’ve-got-to-be-fucking-kidding-me look.
Ryan stood there floundering like an idiot while she walked
away, totally bemused by her reaction.
Sipping his coffee, Cam shook his head in pained amusement.
“Wow. How’s that foot tasting, Went?”
Ryan glared at him. “I didn’t say anything to get pissed off
about. She’s so damn touchy.”
“Yeah, you’re a real smooth-talking Casanova, man.”
Well, he used to be, until Candace. He was pretty sure he’d
never had this kind of effect on a woman before. Ryan didn’t like it one bit. He
jabbed an accusatory finger into Jackson’s shoulder. “Thanks for the help,
bro.”
“Hey, even as a ‘woman whisperer’ there was nothin’ I could do
to save you from that train wreck.” The Texan’s black eyes danced with silent
laughter.
“Whatever,” Ryan huffed. He glanced back over his shoulder,
totally distracted and off balance. When Candace turned the corner and
disappeared behind a warehouse, an unfamiliar sinking feeling settled in his
belly. Dammit, he couldn’t let her go like this. “Ah, shit.” He thrust his
half-full cup at Cam and started after her.
“You’re gonna make it worse,” Jackson called out in warning.
“You want my advice so bad? Give her time to cool off.”
Ryan ignored him, though he was secretly afraid the first part
might be true. Every time he opened his mouth around Ace, it was like tossing a
phosphorous grenade on a fuel tanker.
“Well good luck with that,” Cam called after him, and the
fucker was clearly strangling on a laugh.
Ryan raised a middle finger at him behind his back and hurried
down the busy street, stopping twice to let vehicles by. She was already halfway
to the barracks when he finally spotted her. Urgency to fix the situation
thrummed inside him. He broke into a jog. “Hey.”
She glanced over her shoulder and dismissed him with a single,
cutting glance.
Shit. “Hey, wait up.”
She didn’t even break stride. If anything, she walked
faster.
“Ace—” He gritted his teeth and broke into a fast lope. Fine,
he’d go the formal route if that’s what she insisted on. “Captain Bradford.”
At his observance of military courtesy, her pace faltered.
Slowed.
“Wait, please.” He didn’t even care that he was practically
begging for a moment of her time. This was more important than his bruised
ego.
After a few more steps she finally stopped and faced him, her
eyes warning him to keep his distance. “Leave me alone, Sergeant. I’ve asked you
nicely. Now stop pushing me before you make me say or do something I can’t take
back.”
He ignored the rebuke and loped right up to her, stopping a
foot from her. They were alone in the alleyway for the moment, but probably not
for long. He had to make this fast. She had her arms wrapped around her waist as
she faced him, her expression guarded. He regretted having upset her. He hadn’t
meant to. “I just—”
“Wanted to argue with me some more? You’re hoping one of my
superiors sees us? What?”
“No, I—” Damn, he’d never meant to do that to her. He freaking
hated that she seemed determined to think the worst of him.
“Well? You’ve managed to demand my attention once again. What
do you want?”
The unexpected hurt in the depths of her dark eyes hit him
square in the gut. He had to ball his hand into a fist to keep from reaching for
her, drawing her close until she accepted his apology. “I’m sorry. I never meant
to offend you.”
She continued to stare at him as if she didn’t believe a word
he’d said. “Then why do you keep doing this? You know it can’t go anywhere.”
He was at a loss for words. How the hell could he answer that?
He didn’t understand his own instinctive reaction to her. For most of his life
and especially since he’d entered the service, women had always fallen into his
lap without much effort. But not her. So many things about her fascinated
him.
He liked the way she conducted herself, even while her rigidity
made him itch to shake up her controlled world. He liked the way she moved, with
such confidence and a sense of purpose. He wanted to get to know her better. The
real her, not the reserved professional she showed the rest of the world.
Beneath that cool facade lay a soft vulnerability that lit up every protective
instinct he possessed. And she was worried about more than being seen with him,
whether she wanted to admit it or not. Something that was keeping her from
sleeping. The most primal part of him demanded he hold her, make her feel safe
and cherished.
Most of all, he wanted her to know he cared.
Ryan opened his mouth, struggling for something to say to erase
the damage he’d done and start fresh. Trouble was, he didn’t know what to say,
since his instincts had been dead wrong with her so far.
As the silence lengthened, her left eyebrow rose in censure.
“So what is it? I’m just too much of a challenge for a guy like you to resist? I
bet you’ve never been turned down before, right? Well, I can assure you, I’m not
playing hard to get. I’m not here to be anyone’s entertainment, and I’m not here
to flirt. I have a job to do—a job that I take very seriously, and I’ve worked
my ass off to get where I am. You think it was easy for me to get into AFSOC?
For once and for all, you need to understand that I will not allow anyone to
jeopardize my career or my reputation, let alone a man who likes to live on the
edge and gets led around by what’s between his legs.”