Tainted Love
Authors: Cate Lockhart
Tainted Love
by
Cate Lockhart
Tainted Love
by Cate Lockhart
Published by Epiphany Books
Copyright © 2015 Cate Lockhart
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author.
All characters in this publication are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
Table of Contents
Abbi hit snooze for the third time, and knew that she was way past pushing her luck to get to work on time.
Mondays! Ugh
. Abbi could hear the shower running, and smell the heavenly scent of coffee. She would never understand how Ben did it. She loved her fiancé, but, seriously, it just wasn’t normal to be up and singing in the shower with the coffee made before the alarm clock went off on a Monday. Or any day for that matter. Groaning, she sat up and was proud of her progress. Honestly, if she didn’t work for her mother, she probably would have been fired long ago. Now she just got reminded of that fact once a week or so, but still collected a wage. Small price to pay really.
‘Good morning, beautiful, you look like you’re raring to go,’ Ben said as he entered the bedroom. He still did that. After two years of living together and knowing that she hated being spoken to as soon as she woke up, he would still tease her first thing in the morning. Abbi glared at him but he laughed and strolled over to the wardrobe to select his clothes. It wasn’t personal. She would have glared at Santa Claus first thing in the morning. She reached forward and petted Buddy, their Yorkshire terrier who was still sound asleep on top of the cover.
‘You’re the only beautiful one around here,’ she said as she scratched under his ear. Buddy cracked an eye open and thumped his tail at her. She smiled, and made her way out of the bedroom and down the hall towards the aroma of coffee.
The coffee pot was already half gone, so Ben had been up for a while. The news played quietly in the living room, and Abbi figured Ben could already tell her everything that had happened over night. He had always been like that, staying caught up on current events. At least as long as she had known him which was almost eight years now. In fact, that is how they met. Ben had been on the junior debate team when Abbi’s mother had decided that she should be more social and get involved at school. Abbi was new at Chesterfield High School and was having a hard time making friends. Abbi’s family had moved back to London when her grandmother had become very ill. Abbi’s grandfather had died quite suddenly two years earlier at seventy-six years old. Her grandmother had taken the shock so very hard and now her health was failing as well. Abbi’s family ran a chain of antique-restoration shops and decided to settle back at their main shop in Kensington, London to be more of a comfort and help to her lonely and ailing grandmother.
Abbi was not much for athletics, but she liked to read and play chess. There wasn’t a chess club at this new school, so the next closest thing to her interests was the debate team. Abbi wasn’t sure about speaking in front of people, but she did like to have interesting and thoughtful conversations, and she certainly leant on the side of being opinionated. She knew that she should have some school involvement on her CV for university as well, so she went to a debate club meeting and met Ben. He was standing at the podium leading a current events discussion when she walked into the classroom for the meeting, and she immediately had a schoolgirl crush on him. He was tall and lean, and had beautiful dark brown hair. With his school tie and glasses on, he looked so professional and mature as he argued his point with his deep articulate voice. Abbi felt herself blush when he momentarily hesitated, and watched her find a place to sit down. She saw a half-smile creep across his face when their eyes met, and then he continued his debate.
Now eight years later, he still looked lean and professional in his shirt and trousers as he walked into the kitchen and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He had one more year to go on the foundation programme, followed by several more years of vocational training. Eventually Abbi would be married to a fully qualified doctor.
She really was very proud of him. The years of medical school had been long and arduous, but he never complained, not once. Abbi had tried university, but she found out quickly that academic life was just not for her. She still loved to read, but she couldn’t stand having to write about what she read. Why couldn’t she just read and talk about it? That did not go over so well with her professors, so after two long and frustrating years, Abbi decided to go into the family business, which thrilled her parents completely. Honestly, their daughter working in the family and engaged to a doctor? Not to mention, her parents adored Ben since the first day he had come over to take her to a movie. He had brought her mother flowers, and asked her father first if it was ok for him to take his daughter out. ‘Now that’s a fine young man, Abbi,’ her father had beamed at her when she came home that evening promptly at 9pm, her curfew.
Abbi was always good, and had never been a troublemaker or daring. She always thought she would be the one to get caught if she tried to bunk off school or smoke weed behind the school shed like most of the other kids did. No, for Abbi, the closest she ever came to being rebellious was not wanting to spend a weekend writing an essay on Macbeth when she could just as easily talk about it for an afternoon. But she still wrote it, and then withdrew from university at the end of her first year.
‘Are you at the hospital all day?’ she asked as Ben sat down at the table with a bowl of cereal.
‘No, I have a meeting with Dr. Hertz first. Then hopefully, I can make the last of the rounds.’
Dr. Hertz was Ben’s academic advisor, mentor, and boss. Abbi thought he looked like had been practicing medicine since they had used leeches, but Ben raved about the man’s knowledge and tremendous bedside manner. ‘This guy,’ he’d excitedly tell Abbi at the end of his long days, ‘Can make a parent who is watching their child die feel better, for just a minute. What a gift! I hope I can do that.’
That is what Ben wanted to do. He wanted to be a paediatric oncologist. Abbi could not imagine doing a job like that. To spend your day with dying children and their suffering families. She knew she couldn’t handle that. To be honest, she didn’t even really like to hear Ben talk about it too much. She was aware it took a special kind of heart and spirit to spend a life dedicated to this particular field. Abbi was honoured to have such a kind and compassionate fiancé even if she didn’t understand him at times. How do you come home and be normal after a day like that?
She wondered sometimes if it would change him. And change him how? Her mother told her she worried too much. That Ben was the catch of the century. That they were perfect together, and were going to live a long comfortable life together. That sounded about right for Abbi. She had always played it easy and comfortable. Ben had been her first real date and then boyfriend. In fact, even though they had split up a couple of times through high school and university, these break ups had never lasted, and Abbi had never been with anyone else. She had certainly fantasized about other guys. But who didn’t do that and what was the harm anyway? Abbi loved Ben, but sometimes she couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like with someone other than Ben. To kiss and feel another man’s touch? Sometimes, she admitted to herself that she felt maybe a little old. Maybe she was just bored. She was only twenty-four, and her life was pretty much already in a set routine. She worked Monday to Friday at the antique shop doing some restoring and invoicing. She chatted with customers about their projects and went to auctions to look for deals for their shop.
In the evening, she made dinner, folded laundry and either read or watched a movie. Ben had held irregular hours for at least the past two years, so she was usually on her own because even if he was home, he was studying or trying to catch a few hours of sleep. On the weekends, she would usually take Buddy out to the park and watch him play and idly gossip with the other owners. Abbi didn’t have many friends, but she was alright with that. She was close to her family. She had Ben and Buddy.
Abbi and Ben had talked about starting a family once they were married, so a new family addition would give her more responsibility and entertainment as well. Was she lonely? Maybe occasionally. That was when she would lay back and dream of being absurdly rich with a glamorous lifestyle. Her powerful handsome husband would take her on long cruises in their personal yacht and they would make love in the sand of their own private beach. Sure, Abbi liked to fantasise. Who didn’t?
So today was just like any other day. Ben finished eating and put his bowl in the sink. Abbi was leaning against the counter drinking her coffee, and halfway listening to the morning news still trying to wake up. Wrapping his arms around her, Ben smiled warmly. She made every effort to smile back at him. She absolutely adored him, but she absolutely wished he would leave her alone first thing in the morning. A morning person she was not!
Ben rounded on her and pressed his body up against hers. It took less than two seconds for Abbi to realise what he had on his mind.
‘No way,’ she said laughing as she pressed her palms against his chest and pushed him away.
Ben took a step back. ‘Oh, come on, babe,’ he pleaded with a pout more suited to a two-year-old child. ‘There’s nothing to stop us having a quickie.’
‘Ben, I’ve barely got the energy to get ready for work, let alone have a shag.’
A smirk spread across his face. ‘But what am I going to do about Teddy,’ he said, pointing towards the obvious bulge in his trousers.
‘Take a cold shower or …’ She reached up and pinched his cheek. ‘Think about the time you saw your Aunt Frieda in her birthday suit.’
‘Oh, yuck.’ Ben’s expression turned into a scowl. ‘Talk about killing the moment.’
‘Go on go, off to work now,’ she said, shooing him away with a flick of her hand.
He laughed as he took a step forward and kissed her forehead. ‘I love you.’
‘You too. Let me know if you’ll be home for dinner.’
‘Um, sure.’
She ran the tip of her finger down his chest. ‘I’ll serve it in bed,’ she teased. ‘We can play doctors and nurses afterwards if you like,’ she added suggestively.
Ben raised his brows, his eyes suddenly hopeful. ‘In that case, I’ll definitely be home for dinner.’
Abbi playfully slapped his shoulder. ‘Oh, so you’ll make time in your busy schedule for sex but not for one of my home-cooked meals,’ she said, feigning insult.
Ben grinned. ‘Abbi, we both know that cooking is not your strongest attribute. Whereas sex …’
‘Well, I’m sure Buddy would be glad to have your share of a home cooked dinner,’ Abbi said, as Buddy made a sudden appearance.
‘Oh no he won’t! Will you, you little scoundrel.’ Ben bent over and scratched the back of Buddy’s ears.
They had got Buddy last Christmas. This year he was going to be two years old and they both adored him. He was playful and smart, and without a doubt Abbi’s loyal companion following her around the house wherever she went. Buddy was a local favourite at the antique shop, and he was going to turn into twice his size soon if people didn’t stop bringing him in treats.
‘You don’t need it anyway, do you, Bud?’ Buddy rolled over to have his belly scratched in response.
Ben stood back up and stretched. Abbi thought he looked tired, but he would never admit it. Ben was so driven and dedicated. She knew he lived for his work, but sometimes she wondered how he planned to fit her and a family into his life filled with sick and dying children.
Ben glanced down at his watch. ‘Oh crap. I didn’t realise it was after eight already. I’d better go.’
‘Okay, see you tonight,’ she called after him as he grabbed his coat off the back of the chair and hurried down the hallway. ‘Have a good day.’
‘You too.’ And then he was gone.
Buddy looked at the front door then back to Abbi.
‘I’d better get ready for work myself,’ she said to him, and headed to the bathroom. As she undressed she looked at her reflection in the mirror. At five feet seven, with a slender build and a heart shaped face, she was happy with her outward appearance. The only clue to the turmoil that was going on inside was the lifeless look in her green eyes. The saying that a person’s eyes was a window to the soul, was definitely true – in Abbi’s case anyway.
An hour later, and a good thirty minutes late leaving for work, which was actually on time for her, Abbi left for the train station. She was planning on running to Tesco after work for some shopping, so Buddy was staying at home much to his displeasure.
Hurrying towards the station a dull ache settled in the pit of her stomach. Her life really
was like Groundhog Day: it was the same routine over and over again. What did she expect? Nothing out of the ordinary ever happened in her life, so why would today be any different?