Taking Chances (The Chances and Choices Duology - Book 1 of 2 - Contemporary Romance) (16 page)

I was surprised to see Seth’s Jeep pull in as I
sat on the front porch swing. I had been preparing to see Sam first. Seth
carried a large bouquet of happy-looking daisies and colorful wildflowers,
which he handed to me when he reached the porch.

“Thank you. I’ll go put them in water.” I used
the excuse to have a minute to go in the kitchen and gather my thoughts. I
found a classic Ball jar to put the arrangement in and set them in the center
of our table. Then, I took a few deep, calming breaths before walking out to
join Seth on the porch swing.

We sat side-by-side quietly for a few moments.
Seth broke the silence by saying, “You’ve chosen Sam.” He didn’t pose it as a
question. It was more of a resigned statement.

“No,” I answered him. “I’m not going to be with
either of you. It’s too awkward. I’ve messed things up too much.”

“I thought we had something special. I thought
we were falling in love.” His words nearly broke my heart because I thought the
same thing.

As I had known would happen, Sam’s Porsche pulled
into the drive. Seth didn’t seem shocked either. When Sam eased his long, lean
body out of the low sports car, I saw that he had brought roses, dozens of
them. The brothers nodded solemnly at each other in greeting as Sam held the
red flowers out to me.

I muttered something about putting them in water
and ran for the kitchen. I busied myself finding the good crystal vase and
putting the huge bouquet of long-stemmed red roses in it. When I placed the
vase on the table next to the jar of wild flowers, tears welled in my eyes.

The flower arrangements were great
representations of the brothers. One was wild, fun and free. The other was
elegant, beautiful and dangerous.
How
could I choose between the two? I couldn’t.
The answer was as simple as
that. I strengthened my resolve to go out and tell them that they both needed
to move on. It really was the best thing for all of us.

Sam was the first to speak when I returned to
the porch. “So, you want to be with him, then?” He spat out the question. He
was standing near the porch stairs and I had stopped awkwardly between him and
the swing where Seth sat.

“No, I’m not going to be with either of you.
I’ve made too much of a wreck of things, and you both deserve to be with
someone who loves you and only you.” They were both just looking at me, so I
continued. “It would just be too uncomfortable if I was with one of you. It
doesn’t make sense.”

“This is bullshit.” Sam was angry. “We both care
about you, Abby, and we are all adults here. Choose one of us, then the other
one will go off and lick his wounds for a while. In time, we will all be fine.
No awkwardness needed.”

He was simplifying it too much, and I wasn’t
explaining it right. I couldn’t seem to formulate words that would make them
understand. I knew what I meant and that was all that mattered. As I looked at
these two identical-on-the-outside, near-perfect men, trying to explain why I
couldn’t be with either of them, I was exhausted.

“Just go. Both of you please go.” I could tell
that they were each considering putting up a fight, but I shook my head sadly,
and they both respected my request and left.

I went in the kitchen, looked at both sets of so
gorgeous, but so different flowers and sat down at the table and sobbed.

The shadows of dusk were starting to creep
across the kitchen, so I went up to shower. Then I flopped on my bed and cried
myself to sleep. I tossed and turned all night and awoke certain that I could
have been happy with either one of the dark-haired, green-eyed, sexy-as-hell
Davis twins, if the other didn’t exist.

They both did exist, though, and they were both
amazing. I cared about each of them too much to choose the other one. I had
royally screwed up any chance with either of them, so I needed to pick up the
pieces of my life and move on without them. We would all be better off without
this sick love triangle that I had inadvertently created.

I showered again in the morning and walked to
work on autopilot. A blaring horn snapped me out of my daze when I started to
cross the street in front of a car to get to Eck,
Meck
& Dreck. Annie was standing just inside the door of the shop and ran out to
get me.

“Be careful, Sweetheart!” She waved to the car
in apology as she put her arm around me and swooped me into the safety of the
shop. “No boy is worth losing your life over.”

“I’m sorry.” I wasn’t sure why I was
apologizing. She seemed concerned about me, though, and I didn’t want her to
worry.

“No need to apologize. I just love you, and I
don’t like seeing you so upset, especially not over a boy.” Then she added, “Or
two boys.
Tish
tosh.” She waved if off, as if it were
an every day occurrence for a person to fall for two men.

As if reading my mind, she went on, “You know, I
was once in love with two boys.” Her revelation surprised me. I had thought I
had heard all of Annie’s stories.

She seemed lost in thought as she continued.
“One was my high school sweetheart. Adam was kind, and sweet and wholesome and
good-looking. He was a star athlete at our little high school.” She smiled as
she described him, obviously remembering him fondly. “Everyone thought we would
end up together.”

I nodded, wondering about the other boy. She
sighed deeply before continuing. “The other boy, J.D., was a rebel. He was dark
and dangerous and handsome-as-sin. I couldn’t seem to resist the magnetic pull
I felt towards him, even though I could sense that he didn’t care enough about
me. At one of Adam’s football games, J.D. lifted my skirt, removed my panties
and stuffed them into the pocket of his jeans. Then he took my virginity
standing behind the locker room.”

She paused before continuing, lost in thought.
“It was glorious, and I couldn’t get enough of J.D. after that. We spent the
next few weeks screwing in any place where we could find a modicum of privacy.
It broke Adam’s heart, but I was so enamored with J.D. that I couldn’t help
myself. I was desperate for J.D. to love me, and I kept telling myself that he
did.”

“I let myself believe that he felt about me the
way I felt for him, until one day after school, when I ran out to jump in his
car for a ride home. I had an hour before my Mom would be home from the salon,
and I planned to enjoy every minute of it naked in my bed with J.D.”

“To my horror, I found him in the driver’s seat
of his cherry-red muscle car leaning his head back on the head rest with the
blonde, curly ponytail of the head cheerleader bobbing in his lap. He had the
audacity to smile at me as she blew him. I slammed the car door shut, and she
didn’t even stop sucking his cock long enough to turn and see who had seen
them. She was under his spell as much as I had been.”

I shook my head, uncertain what to say. I had
let lust get in the way of a wonderful relationship as well. Complete sexual
attraction to another person was difficult to ignore.
Did we all have to choose between steady, dependable love and hot,
frantic sexual desire?

Annie’s affair with J.D. had ruined her
relationship with Adam, and she had ended up losing them both. It made me
curious about why she had encouraged me to choose Sam, and I questioned her
about it.

“Sweetie, I was never going to be happy with
Adam after feeling that intense attraction to J.D. Even if I hadn’t slept with
J.D., I would have always wondered about him. You can’t deny that kind of pure,
animal lust; and if you have the chance to enjoy it, you should grab it, even
if it doesn’t last. Let the consequences be damned.”

I contemplated her words. It was true, I would
never forget my amazingly hot time with Sam, and I couldn’t bring myself to
regret it. I was sorry for the pain it had caused Seth, but if I could take it
all back, I didn’t think I would have the strength to do it.

Annie continued, “What I felt with J.D. was a
once-in-a-lifetime, sensational experience, and I wouldn’t give up those
wonderful memories for anything, even though it didn’t last. It sounds like you
feel that sense of complete
exhileration
with Sam,
and it is a rare and beautiful thing that you should enjoy while it lasts.
Besides, just because J.D. was a cheater doesn’t mean that Sam is.”

I understood now why Annie wanted me to choose
Sam. I had tasted the forbidden fruit, just like she had. There was no turning
back now. The difference was that I was the cheater in our scenario because I
hadn’t ensured that things were finalized with Seth. I had ruined my own chance
of enjoying that feeling of pure, sexual bliss for a longer duration. At least
I would always be able to relive my memories of being with Sam.

Annie had a good, fulfilling life without either
of the boys from her story. I could and would do the same.

Annie ended the story with another of her
classic, jumbled quotes, “I have found that the sky is sometimes bluer on the
other side of the rainbow; but once we experience it, it’s hard to go back.”
Then she patted my shoulder and went to the storage room in the back of the
store. I was pretty sure I had seen a tear glistening in her eye. I had never before
seen Annie cry.

I went through the next several days in a bit of
a haze. I made it to work on time, and I responded appropriately to concerned
questions; but I wasn’t fully engaged. I just wanted to curl up in bed and
sleep for a week.

When I saw Courtney walk into the shop and Annie
stepped forward, I knew they were staging some sort of intervention. I didn’t
want either of them to worry, and I was touched that they both cared so much;
but I wasn’t ready to be my usual, perky self. I tried to come up with some
words to let them know that I would be okay, but that I needed some time to
heal.

“You know we love you.” It was Courtney who
spoke. “But you have to snap out of this funk.” She moved to put her arms
around both of us and we stood in a three-way hug. The store was empty of
customers, so we were able to speak freely.

“Maybe the three of us should have a fun night
together. We could rent a movie, order pizza and drink martinis at my place.”
It was Annie’s idea. She turned to Court and asked, “Do you think Joe would
give you the evening off?”

“I’m sure I can work it out. I’ll see if one of
the other girls can cover my shift. It sounds fun.”

I started to nod in agreement, but all I could
think about was that I was suddenly overly warm. Sweat broke out on my lip and
my stomach started roiling. I tried to swallow away the nausea, but still knew
without a doubt that I was going to vomit. I couldn’t make it to the restroom
in the back, so I ran to the trash receptacle behind the counter and retched
into that.

Once I was finished, I said, “Sorry you had to
witness that. I must be coming down with some kind of flu bug.”

I saw the concerned look that Courtney and Annie
shared. Court said gently, “
Ab
, there aren’t many flu
bugs going around right now.”

I wondered what she was getting at as I put a
hand to my forehead and said, “Maybe it was something I ate.”

Both of them moved to face me on the other side
of the counter. Annie looked at Court before asking delicately, “Is there any
chance you could be pregnant?”

I shook my head automatically. “I can’t get
pregnant.” It hurt my feelings that they would ask me this, when they both knew
how much I had longed for a baby during my marriage.

Courtney talked slowly when she responded, as if
speaking to a young child. “You think you can’t get pregnant because it didn’t
happen during your marriage to that pinkie-dicked, cheating scumbag.”

“Right.” I drew my words out slowly like she
had. “His new woman is pregnant, so I was clearly the one with the fertility
problem during our marriage.”

“Unless that skanky ho-bag cheated on him.”
Court’s words made my mind reel. I hadn’t considered that possibility.

I shook my head, trying to process.
Could I be pregnant?
I had been tired
and emotional, but I thought it was just due to my love life being in the
toilet and possibly a severe case of PMS.
Was
my period late?
I tried to focus on the date and calculate how long it had
been since my last menstruation.

“Whoa, whoa here. Let’s not go jumping to crazy
conclusions, just because I threw up once.”

They looked at each other, and I could tell they
were both thinking the same thing. “Did you use any protection?” It was Annie
who voiced the question out loud.

“No, I didn’t think I could get pregnant.” I
almost screeched the answer. That was the true answer for why I hadn’t used
protection with Seth; but embarrassingly, I had been so hot for Sam that the
thought of needing protection hadn’t even crossed my mind before jumping his
bones.
How could I have been so ridiculously
irresponsible?

Suddenly, my stomach sank.
If I am indeed pregnant, how will I know who the father is?
I
voiced the fear aloud. “I slept with identical twins within a week of each
other.” The idea made me cringe with shame. I winced, but continued. “If I’m
pregnant one of them is the father and one is the uncle, but how will we
determine which is which?”

By the looks on Courtney and Annie’s faces, I
could see that I was the last one to come to this realization. For once, Annie
was the voice of reason. “Okay, let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. You
might not even be pregnant, and if you are, they might have some new-fangled
paternity testing that will tell you who the father is.”

“They are identical twins. They have identical
DNA.” My eyes were open wide as I said the words. I was stunned by my own
stupidity.
How could I have let this
happen?

“They can probably pinpoint the exact time of
conception.” Courtney reassured me. “Let’s find out for sure if you’re even
pregnant before we go worrying about any kind of paternity testing.”

Her words made sense, but I had a sinking
feeling in the pit of my stomach. I numbly went through the process of buying
the test kit at the pharmacy and peeing on the stick, but the little plus sign
only verified what I already knew. I was pregnant, and one of the Davis twins
was the father, but which one?