Taking Flight (11 page)

She answered quicker this time than she had before, but I could hardly hear her, it was so noisy wherever she was. And she had to shout into the phone to hear herself. “Hello!?”

“Caitlyn, it’s me,” I told her, but she didn’t reply at first. The noise around her got a little quieter.

“What?!” she repeated, and I heard her exhale heavily against the phone. Finally, the noise stopped, and it was silent. I felt strange, like I’d interrupted her fun.

“Sorry. Um, it’s Lauren.”

She squealed so loudly into the phone I had to move it away from my ear. “Lauren! Oh, I’m sorry for that.” She laughed, loudly and obnoxiously. I realized she was probably drunk, at least to some degree. “I’m at a party, but I went outside so it’s okay now. Whatcha doin’?”

“Watching a stupid movie in a truck bed,” I told her. “But they left me here so I stole the son’s cell phone. I’m not sure when they’ll be back.”

“So no one’s listening?” She laughed. “That’s awesome! Now you can tell me about the hot girl you’re gonna hook up with.”

“I’m not hooking up with her; she has a boyfriend.”

“Oh, come on. That’s never stopped you before.”

“Caitlyn, I called you because I miss you,” I told her, frustrated. “Not because I want to talk to you about stupid shit.”

“Okay,” she replied, but she seemed distracted. “What did you want to talk about, then?”

I sighed, my heart sinking in my chest. I should’ve known she’d be out on a Friday night. “Just… never mind, I guess. You’re busy.”

“No way. Look, you might not get the chance to talk to me again without people listening to you. Let’s talk.” Her words were slurred, but I could tell she meant it. And I supposed talking to a drunken Caitlyn was still better than talking to anyone else.

“I just… I don’t know what I’m doing anymore,” I admitted. “I thought I wasn’t gonna care what these people thought, and I’m kind of thinking I’m starting to.”

“Dude, you don’t care what anyone thinks,” she pointed out with a giggle. “Now you suddenly care about this redneck family?”

“Well, I mean, it’s always bothered me when people talked shit in school and all that, but obviously we both know to just brush that stuff off. It’s different when it’s your roommate for five months.”

“So it
is
the daughter,” Caitlyn said. I paused.

“Why do you say that?”

“Well, she’s the one you’re rooming with, right? You didn’t say it was different when you’re
living
with someone for five months, like the family. You specifically said ‘roommate’. You care what she thinks.” She laughed, suddenly. “I don’t blame you, I guess, if she’s hot.”

I sighed, rolling my eyes to myself. “She’s just the one I’ve talked to the most. I think maybe we’re friends. If we’re even that.” I sighed again and changed the subject. “I just feel like I’m not doing things the way I thought I would and now I feel really uncomfortable about it.”

“Well…” Caitlyn trailed off, and I knew she was trying to think of something to say. I wished she was sober. “Okay. Maybe there’s a time to be an asshole and there’s a time to not be an asshole? Like if they try to force you to go to church: asshole time. If they try to force you to go to school and graduate: not so much asshole time. If therapist guy asks about your mom: asshole time. If he asks about your day: ixnay on the assholery. And not being a total bitch all the time doesn’t make you a pushover, right? Like, maybe you just didn’t feel like putting up a fight that day.” She exhaled loudly, and I could practically envision the grin on her face as she added, “Damn, I give good advice drunk.”

“How about this one?” I proposed, somewhat satisfied with her answer. “We can talk about the hot girl.”

“Finally, yes!” she retorted. “Tell me about her.”

“She’s the only one I’ve gotten to really know so far. I mean, the brother’s alright, the dad’s annoying but he could be worse, and the mom’s that totally fake ‘bless your heart’ type. But the girl’s cool, I think. Kind of high-strung sometimes, but… anyway, her name’s Cammie.”

“Do you like her?”

I shrugged, and then realized she couldn’t see it. “Not really like that. I mean, we’ve already established her hotness, so it’s not like I’d say no, but she’s definitely straight and she’s off with her boyfriend right now. Anyway, that’s not exactly what I wanted to talk about.”

“Okay?” Caitlyn replied, sounding confused.

“The thing is, I’m not sure she likes her boyfriend. I’m kind of not sure she likes anything she says she likes.”

“What does that mean?”

“Well, her mom really likes this guy she’s dating, but she just keeps telling me that he’s ‘nice’. And she’s a cheerleader. Guess who really likes cheerleading?”

“This is my shocked face,” Caitlyn deadpanned, and then after a pause, added, “I’m not making a shocked face, by the way.”

“The weird thing is that she seems totally confident about it all most of the time. Like, they’re totally that couple that’ll win Homecoming King and Queen and all that shit; she has this town locked down.”

“Get her to teach you her ways,” Caitlyn joked. “You, too, can have a popular boyfriend and be on a team your parents approve of. It beats the team you
do
play for.”

“Very funny.”

“Seriously, though… What’s with the over-analysis? She’s just some girl you’ll never see again in five months.”

“Yeah, I know. Maybe it’s just wishful thinking, or something, but I guess I was just hoping I was living with someone sane. It’d be nice if she turned out to be really cool.”

“She could still be cool without having some massive hidden whatever you’re trying to dig up,” Caitlyn said. “Maybe she’s a hot country girl with a boyfriend she’s ‘meh’ on but doesn’t wanna dump for her parent’s sake, and she knows how to work the high school social ladder. Sounds pretty badass to me.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I’m always right. Now how’s your whole hookup plan coming? Since you so
obviously
are gonna be able to get laid in Collinsville?”

“I’m working on it,” I told her, rolling my eyes.

“You have a target yet?”

“Gross; I’m not manipulative enough to call her a ‘target’, Caitlyn. Jesus.”

“So there is a girl?”

“She’s in my Physics class. She shaved like half her head and—”

“Gay,” Caitlyn interrupted.

“Not by itself; Rihanna did it,” I reminded her with a grin. “But I’m getting vibes anyway. And I think Cammie might know something, because she’s getting super uncomfortable with me hanging out with this girl, and she made some weird comment about how I should be more socially savvy or something.”

“Maybe she’s jealous.”

I let out a dry laugh. “Maybe you’re too drunk for this. Listen, I’m gonna try to get us uncensored calls from now on, okay? I’m making friends who might let me borrow their cell phones if I can ever get some time alone with them outside of school hours.”

“I want constant updates. Even if you can’t give me them uncensored,” she told me.

“Deal. Look, they might come back soon, so…”

“It’s cool. I’ve got a party to get back to. And I’ll have to update you on what’s going on here soon too. You’ll never guess what Daniel Hunter and Jaime Lyons did.”

“I’m gonna guess it involves sex.” I sat up in my seat and looked around, checking to make sure no one was coming back yet.

“Ah, you’re too smart for me.” I heard Caitlyn giggle.

“Drink some water. I’ll call you soon.”

“Okay. Love you, girl. Bye!”

The call ended with a click and I spent a minute figuring out how to erase all traces of it from Scott’s phone. Another minute later, I was back in the truck bed, alone.

I picked a good time to end my conversation with Caitlyn, because it wasn’t long before I heard footsteps heading back toward the truck.

It was Cammie, and she was by herself. Her hair was mussed just slightly; I wouldn’t have noticed it had I not known to look for it. It was the same for her crinkled skirt. I realized with muted surprise that she’d had sex with Peter in his car. “Hey,” I greeted her, trying to take her rather clear lack of virginity in stride, but it was hard to hide my shock. It honestly had never occurred to me that Cammie wasn’t a virgin.

“Hey,” she replied quietly, and I wondered if she was aware of how exactly she looked. I wasn’t sure if I was just used to spotting those same traits on myself, or if it was actually obvious to anyone with eyes what she’d just done. Either way, it was probably better that she not look the way she did by the time Scott got back here.

“Where’s Peter?” I asked her as she collapsed beside me in the truck bed.

She answered with a sigh. “He went home. He said he didn’t really like the movie.”

“Oh. Okay.” I moved my purse onto my lap and dug through it for a moment, then pulled out a tube of lip-gloss and offered it to her. She stared at it. “I thought you might wanna reapply. The lipstick you had on earlier’s gone.”

She took it from me, and I saw her cheeks redden even in the darkness. “It’s that obvious?”

“To someone who’s had a lot of sex, yes.” I reached up and pressed my thumb to the corner of her mouth, rubbing slightly. “You have a tiny smear, here, too.” I took my thumb away a moment later, and saw the smear was still there. “It’s gonna need to be wetted; I’m guessing you don’t want my spit on your face, so.”

She forced a laugh and wiped it away herself, then used the tube of lip-gloss I’d given her. “Anything else?” she asked when she was done.

“Straighten the skirt and the hair,” I murmured, reaching up to fix her hair myself, and I don’t think she took her eyes off of me the entire time I worked. When I was finished, I leaned away from her and eyed the top half of her body critically. “I think you’re good.”

“Okay.” We sat in silence for a few seconds, and I turned back toward the movie, but I didn’t register what was on the screen at all. I was trying to wrap my mind around what I’d learned. But it was no wonder now that Cammie hadn’t looked like the typical innocent Southern belle when I’d met her. She
wasn’t
that girl.

“So you don’t seem that surprised,” Cammie finally muttered. “Did you always know?”

I looked over at her to see her gaze glued to her lap. “Know what?”

She let out a dry laugh. “That I’m a total slut.”

“You’re not a slut for having sex with your boyfriend,” I said. “Girls just use that word to try and shame other girls who are hooking up with the guys they want for themselves. And guys use it because they’re bitter they aren’t the ones being hooked up with, and because it makes them look cool around their douchebag friends.”

Cammie didn’t reply to that at first, but it didn’t seem to help, either. She didn’t take her eyes off of her knees.

“You’re not gonna tell my family, are you? Even Scott doesn’t know.”

“They all think you’re a virgin?” I asked, dumbfounded. David and Wendy were believable – Wendy in particular – but Scott was a surprise. I didn’t have a sibling of my own, though, so maybe it really wasn’t something they typically shared.

She nodded. “Yeah. Scott graduated before…” She paused then, like she’d changed her mind about telling me something.

I retreated into my own thoughts. Scott was twenty years old. Three grades above Cammie and me. He graduated at the end of our freshman year.

“I lost my virginity when I was fourteen,” I told her abruptly, and she fixed her gaze to me. I stared straight ahead at the ground between Scott’s truck and the car in front of us, thinking back. “I made friends with the wrong people my freshman year of high school. They got me a fake ID, got me into this club I wasn’t supposed to be in. I met this… this guy there.” Girl. “He was gorgeous… handsome, you know? Said all the right things. I wasn’t really that naïve or anything, you know. I didn’t feel like a victim. And he was seventeen, and hot, and charming. So I went for it.”

“In a club?” Cammie interrupted, a look of disgust on her face.

I laughed a little. “No. Um, he drove us back to his house. He was kind of nice about it, actually. It really wasn’t a bad first time. I was just… young.” I sighed, embarrassed for myself as I continued my story. It all seemed so silly now. “So of course I thought I was, like, totally and completely in love the next morning, being fourteen and just having had great sex with this older guy. He dropped me off at my house, he kissed me goodbye, and I never saw him again.” I paused. “Actually, I take that back. I saw him two years later at the same club, but I don’t think he remembered me. And then that night I pulled the same stuff he’d pulled on me to get someone into my bed.”

Cammie was silent for a while, taking my story in. Finally, she asked, “Do you tell them you love them?”

“No.” That was true. I’d never said those words to anyone but my parents and Caitlyn. “I don’t lie. And I don’t really fall in love, so.”

“Anyone can fall in love.”

“You watch too many movies,” I told her. “Anyway, I just wanted to make you feel better. In case you thought you lost it too young.”

She forced a smile. “Well… you do have me beat, at least.”