Taking Passion by Storm (5 page)

He
thought her hesitation right now was because of what they’d experienced on the
surface. It would be easy to let him continue along that line of thinking, but
she didn’t want to become the subject of gossip that would make him look bad
among his procurement teams or any of the Storm Troopers. “It’s not only the
storms.”

“
I suppose all this must be awkward for you. Being
holed up in a bunker with strangers. We know each other so well, but you just
met everyone today. Well, except me of course, but it’s not like you and I have
had extensive conversations all these years.”

That,
too, would be an easy way out of this. To let him believe she was so quiet
because she was with people she’d only just met. “I know Merrill, too.”

“
True.”

“
But overall you’re right. I’m the new kid on the
block.”

He
nodded several times. “I realize that. I’ll be sure to make an effort to
include you.”

“
Thank you.” She had to set him straight. They might be
on the surface for weeks, and she couldn’t keep allowing this kind of awkward
conversation to go on. It was already making her feel guilty, and the longer it
went on, the worse she’d feel.

She
hadn’t stopped thinking about spilling her guts to him since Saturday, so there
must be a damn good reason why she felt compelled to do so. It was time to tell
him what had happened to her, and she’d just have to deal with the
consequences.

Chapter
Five

Nadine
realized that she couldn’t hear the group in the other part of the bunker.
Maybe she’d been wrong about the walls here? She and Addison were isolated.
What if no one could hear them, no matter what they said or did in this room?

As
soon as that thought took shape, she let the erotic images of making love to
him surface. Almost immediately, panic tried to overwhelm her, but she pushed
it down. Addison would never hurt her. His longtime friendship with her father
assured that. Plus, he wasn’t that kind of a man. Sure, he dated around, but
that didn’t make him a rotten person who would take advantage of a woman.

When
he reached up and brushed a strand of hair from her face, she tried not to
flinch, but it happened before she could stop it. She knew her reaction stemmed
from the direction her thoughts had taken, not because she hadn’t enjoyed him touching
her, but he didn’t know that. The hurt and confusion on his face mirrored the
look he’d given her Saturday morning.

“
I have to keep reminding myself that you’re Dixon’s
daughter.” His voice was soft but so damn sexy it took her by surprise, as did
his cryptic remark. “I suppose this is the worst possible time to tell you
this, but I have to say it. The longer I hold it in, the worse it’ll be, and we
might be on the surface for weeks. I need to get this out.”

A
shiver ran down her spine as she realized his words eerily echoed her own
decision only moments ago.

“
Nadine … shit. Please don’t be upset with me for
saying this.”

What
the hell was he about to tell her? It couldn’t be any worse than the secret
she’d been holding inside for four years. “I won’t be. Just say it.”

“
Okay. I’ve always had a thing for you. Ever since you
were legal.”

Holy shit.

“
Um, let me rephrase that so it doesn’t sound creepy. I
didn’t lust after you when you were a kid. That’s not what I mean.”

She
swallowed hard and nodded because her voice seemed to have disappeared.

“
I kept it to myself for your father’s sake. I don’t
mean because he told me to stay away once you were out of high school. He
doesn’t know I still feel this way. I mean out of respect for him. Otherwise I
would have asked you out again, and I would have kept asking you out until you
said yes.”

She
was stunned into silence. He looked so expectant, so unsure of her reaction,
and she realized what an effort telling her that must have been for him. But
the muscles in her mouth simply would not move.

“
I know. Don’t say it. I’m a giant shit for telling you
all this now. I don’t even know why I did. You just looked so … I don’t know.
Vulnerable, I guess, and lost. I had this overwhelming need to protect you, and
I realized you had a right to know how I feel.”

“
Addison, I…” She what? How on earth could she tell him
this now, after what he’d just confessed? But if not now, when? He had to know.

He
brushed a finger along her hair, and she let out a shaky breath. The mere act
of touching her again sent her hormones racing. She had to get this out so he
could stop thinking he’d done something wrong. She wanted him, but Nadine knew
she had a shitload of mental work to do before she could ever reach that stage.
She wasn’t even sure she
could
reach
it. She hadn’t tried in four years.

This
sure as hell wasn’t the right time to find out, was it?

He
cupped her face, and this time she gasped softly. “It’s all right. You don’t
have to say anything if you aren’t comfortable doing so. It’s enough to see
that look in your eyes.”

What look? Shit. Time to speak.
It’s now or never.

Nadine
took a deep breath. She didn’t think about what she was going to say. She
merely let the words come out. “Addison, I think you’re the most drop-dead
gorgeous man I’ve ever seen.”
All true.
“Under better circumstances, it wouldn’t matter if I was my father’s daughter.”
True again. Now for the hard part.
“I
have to be honest, though.”
He won’t like
this.
“I don’t want to be just one more woman who makes the gossip columns
with you.”

Coward.
Talk about taking the easy way out.

He
shook his head. “I don’t want that either. I swear it. I was like that. I admit
I was, but I’m not that man anymore.”

And there goes your last defense.
Karma, baby. Serves you right.

“
I know that’s hard to believe. I’ve played around for
far too long, but no more. It’s not what I want.”

She
hadn’t been expecting him to say that, but hearing it sent a thrill through
her. “What do you want?” she whispered.

He
gave her such a look of longing that she nearly cried. This was so normal. It
was what she’d hoped for and had never been able to let happen. Even so, the
images that popped into her head suddenly weren’t of Addison. They were of
that man
.

Would
he understand the way she’d kept him at a distance when she told him? Maybe he
knew someone who could finally help her deal with this in a real way? In a way
that would allow her natural instincts to take over, instead of this hesitation
and uncertainty.

She
watched his full lips that begged to be kissed, and then her gaze drifted over
to that damn sexy stubble on his chin. He was probably an amazing kisser. He’d
certainly had enough practice. Would that mouth on hers make her forget, or
would it only make things worse?

He
moved one hand off her face to brush his index finger along her lips, as if
reading her mind. His lips curled up at the corners. “What do I want? I want
you, Nadine. Only you.”

Nadine’s
pulse raced as he bent his head to kiss her. She held her breath, determined to
let this happen so she could find out whether it was possible to react to a
kiss from a seductive man in a normal way.

Just
before his mouth touched hers, the door burst open and Lee stood there with a
knowing grin on his face.
Shit.
God
only knew what they’d all been saying about her and Addison. “Hey … um … lunch
is ready.”

Addison
gave her a quick look of regret, and then he took her hand. She rose with him,
waited until Lee turned around, and then squeezed his hand. He glanced down at
her and opened his mouth as if to say something, but she beat him to it,
whispering so Lee didn’t hear her.

“
There’s something I have to tell you as soon as
possible. It’s very important.”

He
frowned. “All right. Do you want to tell me now?”

“
No. I don’t want any speculation among your friends.”

A
shadow of pain crossed his face. “Are you seeing someone? Oh, God. I’m such an
ass. It never occurred to me. I assumed—”

“
No.” She cut him off. “I’m not seeing anyone. It’s
nothing like that.”

The
look of relief on his face almost forced up a smile.

“
Okay. We’ll talk after we eat then. Agreed?”

She
sighed. “Yes. Thank you.” It would be okay. She’d tell him, and everything
would work out.

****

Addison
wasn’t hungry now, but he ate anyway. It wouldn’t do him any good not to keep
up his strength. He and Merrill were the oldest ones on this team, aside from
George who was older than any of them. Addison suspected George could run
circles around all of them combined.

As
he ate, he watched Nadine carefully. Lee kept glancing toward her with the same
stupid grin on his face. Addison would need to do something about that. Nadine
felt awkward enough, that much was obvious. She didn’t need to be teased for
speculation on top of
it.He
was the one who had
nearly kissed her, not the other way around. This was his fault. He’d have to
be careful. The walls were thick in the bunker, but if anything happened
between him and Nadine, everyone would know about it regardless.

There
were no secrets on these missions. They lived in quarters that were too close
for that, when they had quarters at all. More often than not, they were in
sleeping bags on the floor of a cave or in one of the shelters. When they
slept, that was.

He
was out of his fucking mind to be contemplating something like this, but the
words had come tumbling out before his filters kicked in. This woman had an
effect on him that was unlike anything he’d experienced before. He was
incapable of rational thought when he was this close to her.

So stay away from her.

Right.
Like that would be so fucking easy now, after what he’d told her.

“
Nadine, what was it like growing up with a father
who’s a genius?” Alesia sounded genuinely interested, and Addison was grateful.
She was one of the youngest Storm Troopers in the country, but she held her own
and was fearless.

“
I never got away with not doing my homework.”

The
others laughed, and Addison smiled. Nadine adored her father, and he loved her
fiercely. That was enough reason to stay away from her. He respected Dixon, and
Nadine needed her dad. They had to find him. They simply had to.

“How
is it you didn’t end up in the same field?” asked Suzanne
.
“I’d have
thought he wouldn’t give you much choice.”

She
shook her head. “He wasn’t like that at all. This is his passion, but he always
encouraged me to do what made my heart sing. That’s how he phrased it. Do what
makes your heart sing.”

“
What makes your heart sing?” asked Addison. He held
his breath as he watched the emotions cross her face. What was rumbling
underneath the surface? Did it have something to do with what she wanted to
tell him? She was in pain, but from what? What the hell had happened to this
girl?

“
I don’t think I’ve figured it out yet.”

“
You have plenty of time. Maybe this adventure will
reveal something to you?”

Merrill
cleared his throat loudly
,
and it was at
that point Addison realized how sexually provocative his comment sounded,
especially in light of what Lee had come across earlier. He thought about
saying something else, but realized that would only make him look guilty.
Instead he simply waited for Nadine to speak, hoping she hadn’t interpreted his
comment the same way Merrill had.

“
I can’t see myself doing what you all do. I was
terrified up there when that storm came up so suddenly.”

“
We all were,” said Suzanne. “Don’t let our actions
fool you. There’s nothing predictable about any of this, and we know that.
We’ve simply been doing it for a while and know what to look for, but we’ve
been fooled plenty of times and had to scramble to reach safety.”

“
And the radar isn’t always available,” said Gina. “The
satellites are all fucked up, and sometimes we have to go on without it.”

“
Then why do you do it?” asked Nadine.

“
I’m doing it for the same reason Addison and the other
Weathermen have teams looking for the hackers,” said Alesia, her voice quiet
but commanding. “To take back our planet. I hate living underground. It’s like
I can’t breathe.”

“
Same here,” said Merrill. “This is my home, and I’m
not going to let some two-bit assholes who figured out complicated code force
us all to live like moles. Fuck that. I’ll walk into those damn storms and
collect data, and will likely die doing so one day, but at least there will be
data for someone else to analyze.”

“
I guess that leaves us,” said Lee. “The procurement
teams.”

“
What you do is no less brave,” said Nadine.

He
grinned and bowed his head slightly. “Thank you for saying so. We take a lot of
shit at times for being what some call pirates.”

“
No one here would call you that,” said Addison,
quietly. Lee wasn’t someone he’d been working with very long, but he’d chosen
him for this mission because Addison had never seen him rattled. However, he
didn’t like the way the guy was now openly flirting with Nadine. He’d have to
speak to him, soon and privately.

“
No, no one in this room would, but I’ve heard others
do so.”

Addison
narrowed his eyes. “On my procurement teams?”

Lee’s
face colored slightly. “No … no. Rumors, you know. You hear things.”

“
Ignore the rumors. I’ve never heard of any open
animosity between what you do and what the Storm Troopers do. Regardless, we’re
all here for the same purpose right now. To find Dixon. Let’s concentrate on
that, all right?”

Lee
leaned back in his chair, his gaze challenging. “You’re the boss.”

Addison
decided to ignore the comment for now. He listened to and watched everyone as
the conversation turned toward The Madeline Project, the Tommy Twister virus,
and what weather data the Storm Troopers had been able to collect so far.
Nadine asked questions of Merrill and Alesia, and it was clear that Dixon had
taught her more than she likely realized. She understood so much about what
they did.