Talk a Good Game (47 page)

I nodded. “Yes, I can’t hide from
my mother forever.”

She gave me a look like she’ll
believe it when she sees it but I ignored her and headed over to
the coffee pot.

“
You doing the Sunday brunch this
morning?”

Janelle nodded.
“April took the
day off to spend it with her husband
’s
family. So
I
’
m gonna hold it down today.” She
usually had the day off but every now and again Janelle covered for
her. I filled a cup with coffee then reached for the creamer and
headed over and slid onto a barstool at the island.

“
Have you spoken to
Frankie?”

She shook her head and for the first time I saw
something on her face that was so unusual for
Janelle—frustration.

“
Girl, just call
him,”
I
urged her.

Janelle took a sip for her mug
then looked over at me. “Frankie
’s
not having it.
I either come correct, or don’t come at all.”

“
Okay so
what
’s
stopping
you?”

She tried to look like she had no
idea what I meant. Then her expression softened.
“
I
don’t
know. It wasn’t until Frankie gave
me that damn ultimatum that I realized how much he really means to
me. And that
’s
what really scares me. I
thought I was in love with Kaleb, but now I think I feel sorry for
him and CJ more than anything else. I just don’t know
anymore.”

I leaned forward. “So what does
your heart say?”

Janelle gave me a sad smile.
“That
’s
the problem. I don’t trust my
heart. I’ve always operated on what I wanted, not what I needed.
Now I just don’t know which way to turn.” She sounded
exasperated.

“
That
’s
easy. Crazy or
sanity?”

Janelle gave me one of her
Kool-Aid grins. “You know I like them crazy.”

I blew out a long breath as I
stirred my coffee. “I know and that’s the problem. At some point
you need some stability in your life.”

“
That
’s
what you thought you had with
Jeremy and you see how that turned out.”

I turned my head, avoiding her
gaze and took a sip. “
True.
”

“
The beautiful thing is I don’t
have to make any decisions about my life. You married your crazy
mothafucka, I didn’t,” she replied with a hand at her
hip.

She was right again.

Between sips, she looked at me
with skepticism. “I’ll be honest. I am really feeling Frankie and I
don’t want to lose him but at the same time I feel like Kaleb,
especially CJ needs me. There is something more going on with that
boy. Kaleb said he was too young when his mother died but CJ says
he remembers his mother reading and singing to him. I really think
his problems…, all that rocking shit, has something to do with
her.”

My brow rose. “And you wanna save
the day?”

She looked like she was trying to
digest the idea. “Yeah, actually I do. I went through a lot growing
up. More than I’ve ever shared with you. Frankie knows my pain but
not too many others. I know the scars a past can bring. For some of
us those wounds never heal.”

My eyes shot open wide. “You
really do have a heart.”

She pointed a finger at me. “Yes
and you do too. So do you, bitch, and follow your heart. Nothing
worse than living a life of regret. I’ve been regretting shit for
the last twenty years.”

There was something sad in her
eyes. “Is it something you wanna talk about?”

“
Girl, no.
That
’s
a closed chapter in my life,”
she said and waved her hand like she was dismissing me even though
something distant in her eyes said her demons were far from gone.
Whatever it was I hoped someday she would share with me. “If Jeremy
is where your heart is then take his crazy ass back and work
through your problems, but he
’s
gotta quit all that
lying! Damn! Ain’t nothing worse than a liar.”

Her eyes met mine and I nodded.
Janelle was right but I was starting to think that Jeremy had been
lying for so long he didn’t know what the truth was anymore. And
that was a damn shame. “
I don’t
know anymore.
Like Mama always said just turn it over to the Lord and
that
’s
what I
’m
planning
on doing.”

Janelle nodded. “I better get out
of here.” She put her mug in the sink then grabbed her Prada purse
off the counter and left the house.

I arrived at church a little
earlier than usual. Daddy was up on the front row with all of the
deacons but Mama was sitting in her usual spot fanning herself.
Knowing her, she had been shouting this morning and worked up a
sweat. I decided to seat on the end of the pew near Ms. Chapman. I
knew my mother wouldn’t dare say anything about Jeremy in front of
her friends.

“
Good morning, Ms. Chapman,” I
said, with a wide grin, as I scooted past her and took a seat on
the other side.

“
Good morning, Nyree,” she said
softly.

I waited until I was seated to
look over at my mother. She just smiled like everything was right
in the world.
Maybe Jeremy hadn’t called
her.
Or maybe she was putting on a good
front. Either way I was sure to find out by the end of
service.

I waved and lowered my purse to
the floor in front of me and got ready for the choir to perform.
Within minutes they had the entire congregation off their feet and
rocking to the rhythm of the music; I was listening to every word
of Kirk Franklin’s,
Imagine
Me
. By the end of the song, I looked over
at the door and gasped as I saw Jeremy walk into the church,
holding hands with two beautiful little girls. Anyone could see
they were his. They had the same chocolate complexion and big brown
eyes. I couldn’t move as I watched him point in my direction and
then the girls came over.

“
Hi, Ms. Nyree,
” they both
said, and had members close by laughing and
smiling.

“
Hi sweethearts,” I answered and
patted the spaces beside me. Jeremy took a seat on the other side
of Caitlyn. I refused to look at him and focused on the minister as
he spoke. Halfway through service Jasmine fell asleep. She was
resting her head on me and I draped an arm around her. I truly
didn’t think I had room in my heart to fall in love with two little
girls but I already felt protective of them.

While praying, Jeremy reached over and took my hand
in his, and instantly I felt that electrical charge. I turned my
head and our eyes met.

“
I
’
m sorry,” he mouthed, with tears
streaming down his cheeks.

I squeezed his hand and bowed my head, and prayed to
the Lord for guidance.

After church I stayed long enough to talk to the
girls and Jeremy, as he introduced them to my parents. Of course my
mother was already in love. Jeremy promised to bring them by
later.

“
You have time
to go with the girls and I to McDonald
’s
?” he
asked, searching my eyes, trying to get a sense of what I was
feeling. I nodded then climbed in my car, and waited until he had
already pulled off before I texted him and told him I couldn’t join
them. I know it was the cowardly thing to do but I didn’t know how
else to handle the situation.

I got back to the house, let Honey
out and then took a shower. Once I was under the spray of water, I
started crying until I couldn’t cry anymore. My heart hurt on so
many levels. I loved that man so much and his girls were so
adorable I wanted nothing more than to be a part of their lives.
But—not if I had to live a life of lies.

While I was lying across the couch I must have dozed
off because I woke up hours later when I heard Honey barking.
Someone was at the door.

I pulled the door open and there was Jeremy.

“
Can I help you?”

He extended his hand and I looked down at it with
curiosity before meeting his eyes again. And gasped. There was
something there I had never seen before.

Determination.

“
Hi, my name is
Jeremy Anthony Lee Samuels, Jr. I
’
m broke, I have
six kids, three ex-wives, and I only have an associate’s degree.
I
’
m intimidated by my fourth wife
and have insecurity issues, but I have so much love to give, but if
she’ll give me another chance I promise to stop trying to be
someone I’m not.” His lips trembled and his eyes were so full of
remorse; I was so choked up I could barely speak as I shook his
hand.

“
Hello. My name
is Nyree Gail Dawson and it
’s
a pleasure to finally
meet you.” I was laughing and crying at the same time. I then threw
myself into his arms and kissed him.

JANELLE

I saw a crowd gathering right
outside FoxTrot. I tried to see what was going on without drawing
too much attention to my guests, but then I couldn’t take it
anymore and I had to go out and see.

I pushed out the door and noticed
the police cars up and down the street.
What the hell?
My eye scanned the
crowd and I spotted Uncle Todd standing off to the side. I made my
way over to him.

“
Uncle Todd!
” I
cried.

He turned and his expression
softened at the sight of me. We had yet to speak since I’d seen him
at the hospital. I figured we
’
d have to talk
eventually, especially since Mommy mentioned the two were talking
about moving in together.

“
Hey Jae.”

As I moved toward him, a cop
brushed past me and headed inside Frontline. I looked to my
godfather for answers. “What
’s
going on?”

He shook his head.
“It
’s
a sad sad day. Things like this just don’t happen
in our small town.”

“
Things like what?” I said ready
to hear the juicy details.

“
Suicide.
”

“
What? Suicide? Where?” I asked
and then followed the direction of his nod to the clothing store
beside my restaurant. “Who? Alphonso?” I asked although I was
suddenly afraid of where this conversation was going.

“
Yes. The owner,” he said and drew
another breath. “They found him hung in his office.”

“
Alphonso?
” I know I kept
asking the same thing, but I guess if I kept asking eventually
he’ll say someone else
’s
name.

“
Yes, Alphonso Rucker.”

I couldn’t respond because my
mouth was hanging opening. Alphonso was dead. I couldn’t believe
it. Just yesterday, I had cussed him out for stealing my parking
space out back.

As Uncle Todd explained how a
sales clerk found him swinging from the ceiling in his office, I
stood there trying to wrap my mind around the fact that Alphonso
was dead. It just felt unreal yet I couldn’t tear myself away from
the scene that had unfolded out front. The police were trying to
get the crowd back out of the way, then seconds later I watched in
shock as they wheeled his body out of the store in a black bag. I
felt myself stumble and luckily someone was there to catch
me.

“
Whoa, you okay?”

I swung around to find
Frankie
’s
hand at my waist. “No, I’m
not,” I mumbled still in a daze.

“
Here, why don’t I help you
inside,” he suggested and I nodded. Sweeping the area, I spotted
Uncle Todd talking to one of the officers. I would call him
later.

Frankie helped me inside the
restaurant and I ignored the curious stares. It was so unreal.
Visions of Alphonso hanging from the ceiling danced before my eyes.
I don’t even remember walking to my office or Frankie helping me
into my seat.

“
You okay?” he asked again as he
leaned against the edge of my desk.

I couldn’t get the image out of my
head of the medical examiner
’s
office wheeling him
out of the shop. “
The guy next door committed suicide.
”

“
Damn. No shit?”

Frankie listened as I told him
what I knew which wasn’t much.

“
Are you going to be okay?” he
finally asked.

I flinched slightly then reached
for a bottle of water I had next to my desktop and took a long
swallow. I would have preferred something stronger but it would
have to do for now. “I
’
m fine. Really.
It
’s
just a shock to hear that someone I know killed
himself.”