That Summer (Part One) (15 page)

Cole: I’m outside
xx

I
take a deep breath and rake my fingers through my hair, exhaling deeply before
I make my way downstairs.

He’s
at the back door again, even though no one is home so it really wouldn’t matter
if he used the front door. I scurry across my dark living room and into the
kitchen, flinging the back door open in eager anticipation.

A
soon as my eyes fall on him, I have no idea why I was nervous. It’s
him
.
The one I’ve been fighting against since the moment I first saw him. I know it
might have only been a few weeks but it almost feels like a lifetime. The
enthralling, irresistible pull I experience whenever I’m around him is
impossible to ignore and I’m done trying to deny it.

The
gaping hole that’s always been there, the same one I’ve always been aware of ceases
to exist when I’m with Cole. He completes and ignites something deep inside of
me and it’s the most terrifying feeling I’ve ever experienced. It frightens me
but it’s addictive.
He’s
my addiction and I still don’t know how to
handle it.

“God,
I missed you.” He groans, taking me by surprise when he pulls me in for an
embrace.

“You
did?” I mumble against his chest, allowing him to hold me tightly.

“Of
course, baby. I’ve been thinking about you all day. I couldn’t get you out of
my damn head.”

“Same
here.” I admit, gazing up at him as soon as he releases me.

“Your
mum’s at work right?” He asks, slowly making his way into the living room as he
takes a look around.

“Yeah,
she does plenty of night shifts.”

“She’s
always left you alone like this?” He questions, shoving his hands deep in his
pockets as he watches me intently.

“For
as long as I can remember.” I answer truthfully, vaguely recollecting all the
nights she would leave me curled up on the sofa with a bag of crisps for my
tea.

I
guess that’s how I’ve got so used to my own company, I learnt how to take care
of myself from an early age and it’s not something I would recommend for any
child. A lonely childhood can be the worst of all.

“It’s
not right.” He retorts sharply. “I hate the thought of you spending the whole
night here by yourself. Why don’t you ask Lisa to stay over with you?”

“She
sometimes does but I don’t like to ask her all the time. I don’t want her to
feel like she has to babysit me.”

“I’m
sure she wouldn’t feel that way.” He assures me, slowly closing the distance
between us as he walks towards me. “It’s what you girls like to do, right?
Sleepovers and movie nights.”

“Well,
you and I could always have a movie night together if you wanted to.” I smile,
reaching up onto my tiptoes to I can place a soft kiss against his strong
jawline.

“Damn,
now you’re tempting me.” He whispers huskily, circling his arms around my
waist.

“Behave!”
I scold him playfully. “And make yourself at home by going through into the
living room. Would you like a drink or anything?”

“I’ll
have anything you’ve got.” He replies amiably, sounding good-natured and
light-hearted as he heads on into the sitting room.

“Orange
juice?” I call out to him, searching through the contents of our fridge.

“That’s
fine.” He shouts through to me. “Is it alright if I sit down?”

“Of
course. I want you to make yourself at home when you’re here.” I tell him,
handing him his drink once I join him on the sofa.

“Thanks.
You have a really nice house, by the way. It’s so warm and cosy.”

“I
can’t bear the cold so the central heating and fire are always on when I’m at
home.”

“My
mum isn’t what you’d call great at paying the bills.” He divulges bitterly. “We
never have the heating on at our place.”

“Are
you serious? You must be freezing.”

“Why
do you think I came over? I need
you
to warm me up.” He jokes
flirtatiously, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Ha
ha, very funny.” I say, rolling my eyes at him.

“How
was the rest of your day then? No one said anything to you, did they?”

“No,
everyone was nice to me.” I lie, deliberately averting my gaze from his.

“Did
you move your things into my locker?”

“Not
yet.”

“Why
not?” He demands firmly.

“I
just wanted to make sure it would still alright with you before I did it.”

“I
told you it was fine and I don’t want you using that piece of shit locker with
that shit scrawled over it.”

“I
told you I’m not using my old one. I’m sharing Lisa’s.” I remind him patiently.

“I
want
you to have mine. It will reassure me that no one will touch any of
your stuff from now on and it will also help people realise that we’re
serious.”

“Ok,
ok.” I acquiesce reluctantly. “I’ll switch lockers again tomorrow.”

“That’s
great. I won’t say another word about it.” He replies smugly.

I
narrow my eyes at him, equally infuriated and flattered by the idea of him
wanting to keep my belongings safe. However, I don’t appreciate him thinking he
can order me about and tell me what to do. I’m actually considering whether or
not I should ignore his instructions tomorrow and keep on sharing Lisa’s
locker.

“How
did you even find out about what had been done to it?” I ask him, unable to
control my curiosity.

“It’s
not important. What matters is I
did
find out about it.” He growls,
clenching his jaw in anger.

“And
then there’s the thing you mentioned on the phone about me not touching my
food.” I add. “How did you know that?”

“Serena,
I told you I would watch out for you today. I told you that everything would be
ok and all I did was make sure I kept my promise to you.”

It
suddenly dawns on me that he really might have been there at school today. He
must have been keeping watch over me in or around the school’s premises. This
is the one and only explanation of how he came to see the state of my locker.

“Cole,
I really don’t think I can handle you spying on me. It’s just not right.” I
confess, tugging my fingers through my hair.

“Who
said I followed you?” He challenges me, fixating those dark brown eyes of his
on my own.

“There’s
something else I want to ask you about.” I say, eager to change the subject. “I
want to ask you about Louise.”

“What
about her?”

“I
know you told her to record her apology to me and send it to you.” I inform
him. “What I don’t understand is why you would make her do something like
that.”

“I
just wanted to make sure that she said she was sorry. I knew there was a big
chance she would lie to me about it and I thought the only way I could be
certain was to have her send it to me. How the hell do you even know about that?”

“She
told me.” I explain truthfully.

“She
had no right to.” He snaps bitterly.

“Listen,
it doesn’t matter about the recording or anything else for that matter. I just
want you to be honest. I’d rather Louise say nothing to me at all than offer me
some fake apology just for the sake of it.”

“What
do you mean fake? She told you she didn’t mean any of it?” He asks me, raising
his voice in indignation.

“No,
no. She was sincere.” I lie, realising I have no choice but to try and diffuse
the situation before it gets out of hand. Even if it does mean lying to him
again. “I’m just saying… if you asked her to record something, there’s not much
chance of it being genuine.”

“I
suppose you’re right.” He agrees, somewhat begrudgingly.

He
interlaces his fingers and leans forward on the sofa, resting his elbows on the
top of his knees.

“I
always am.” I joke, nudging him playfully.

“Ha
ha, very funny.” He replies, mirroring the exact same comment I made earlier.

“So,
do you want to pick a movie or something to watch?”

“So
long as it’s not a chick flick.” He wisecracks, allowing his heated gaze to
wander up and down my body closely.

I
feel slightly uncomfortably and start to search for a film we can both agree
on. We eventually decide on watching the horror film ‘The Strangers.’ It’s one
of my scariest movies but I’ve seen it so many times, I think I’ve become
desensitised to it. We’re approaching one of the most frightening parts of it
when Cole startles me with his question.

“I
would never have guessed a girl like you would enjoy watching a movie like this.”

“I
swear to God I didn’t enjoy it when I first saw it.” I tell him, remembering
that night all too well. “I was terrified and refused to be alone for days
after I watched it.”

“Who
did you watch it with?” He asks, tightening his arm around my waist as we stay
curled up on the sofa together.

My
head is on his chest and I can hear his heart beating erratically. It’s
thrilling to know that being in such close proximity to me is enough to excite
him and the knowledge of this ignites my own arousal deep inside of me.

“Erm…
Lisa brought it round one Friday night and we stayed up late so we could finish
it. Neither of us slept properly that night.” I say, smiling at the memory of
it.

“That’s
cute.” He chuckles lightly “I would have offered to stay with you if I knew you
back then.”

“I
bet you would have and I know the reason why.” I laugh, poking his toned,
athletic stomach in a teasing manner.

“Seriously,
I would control myself, Serena. I know we’re going to have to take things
slowly and that’s ok with me.”

“Like
we did last night?” I taunt, forcing him to remember exactly what happened just
twenty-four hours previous.

“I
really am sorry about that.” He sighs heavily, as though he’s disappointed in
himself. “I got carried away and wish I hadn’t taken it so far with you so
soon.”

“Don’t
be sorry. It’s not like I regret anything.”

“You
don’t?”

“Not
a single thing.” I reply with certainty.

“That’s
good. I always say that the past is gone and there’s nothing we can do to
change it. There’s no point in carrying the weight of regret. It’s pointless.”

“You’re
right.” I acknowledging, recognising the truth behind his statement. “I never
thought of it quite like that though.”

“That’s
why… that’s why I think I should stay here tonight.” He concludes, awaiting my
reaction.

“You
think you should stay?” I repeat incredulously.

“I’m
serious. I can sleep on the sofa or on the floor in your bedroom, anything you
want, Serena. I don’t like you staying by yourself.”

“I’m
used to it by now.” I respond flippantly, as though it’s no big deal.

“I
still don’t like it. It’s not safe.”

“But
it’s not as though you can spend every single night here when I’m alone. So
what’s the point in just staying for one night?”

“Why
not? It’s not like your mum’s here to stop us.”

“Well,
it’s… it’s just not practical and I don’t want to rely on you for anything.”

“Green,
I really want to spend the night with you but only on your terms. Like I said,
I don’t mind sleeping on the floor or even on the couch. I promise I’ll make
sure I’m gone by the time your mum gets in from work tomorrow.”

“W-would
you stay in my bed if you spend the night?”

“Of
course not.” He answers too hastily, glancing at me when I stay silent. “I
mean, I would but only if you wanted me to. It’s your decision.”

“I
think I do… want you to stay, I mean. I want you to sleep with me.” I say
timidly, nervous when it comes to hearing his response to me.

“Serena…”
He warns, groaning in frustration.

He
tugs his fingers through his hair in anguish, clearly in the midst of making
one difficult decision.

“I’m
not saying I want us to have sex.” I add speedily. “I’m nowhere near ready for
something like that. All I’m saying is it would be nice if you could stay here
with me tonight.”

“I
know it would, baby.” He murmurs softly, twirling a few strands of my hair
between his fingers. “That’s what made me suggest it to you in the first place.
My only concern is if my hands start to wander in the middle of the night without
me even realising and my dick has a mind of its own. I really don’t want you to
feel like I’d be pressurising you into anything and if you feel uncomfortable
at any point, please feel free to kick me the hell out of your room.”

“Don’t
worry, I won’t hesitate to do so.” I promise, settling back down to watch the
rest of the movie.

I’m
more nervous than I thought I would be as we make our way up the stairs one
hour later. I start questioning the decision I made to invite Cole into my bed
and race through all the possible scenarios which might still happen if I see
it through.