The 100 (The 100 Series) (28 page)

Lilly’s lips were moving, but no sound was coming out. Clarke leaned forward and gave her a small smile. “Sorry, didn’t catch that, Lil.” She lowered her head so her ear was closer to Lilly’s mouth. “What did you say?”

At first, Clarke could only feel the soundless wisp of air on her skin, as if there wasn’t enough breath in Lilly’s lungs to push the words out of her mouth. But then a faint moan escaped from her chapped lips. “Did you bring it?”

Clarke raised her head to look into her friend’s panic-filled brown eyes. She nodded slowly.

“Now.” The word was barely audible.

“No,” Clarke protested, her voice shaking. “It’s too soon.” She blinked back the tears that had begun to fill her eyes. “You
could still get better,” she said, but the lie sounded hollow, even to her.

Lilly’s face contorted in pain, and Clarke reached for her hand. “Please.” Lilly’s voice was ragged.

“I’m sorry.” Clarke gave Lilly’s fragile hand a gentle squeeze as tears began to trickle down her cheeks. “I can’t.”

Lilly’s eyes grew wide, and Clarke inhaled sharply. “Lil?” But Lilly remained silent, staring at something only she could see. Something that filled her eyes with terror. The physical pain racking Lilly’s body was terrible, Clarke knew, but the hallucinations, the demons who were with her every moment, hovering at her bedside, were worse.

“No more.”

Clarke closed her eyes. The guilt and remorse she’d feel could never compare to Lilly’s pain. It’d be selfish to let her own fear prevent her from bringing her friend the peace she wanted—the respite from pain she deserved.

Her whole body was trembling so hard, she could barely remove the vial from her pocket, let alone fill the syringe. She stood next to the bed and clasped Lilly’s hand with one arm, using the other to position the needle over Lilly’s vein. “Sleep well, Lil,” she whispered.

Lilly nodded and gave Clarke a smile that she knew would be burned into her brain for the rest of her life. “Thank you.”

Clarke held Lilly’s hand for the few minutes it took for her
friend to slip away. Then she rose and placed her fingers against Lilly’s still-warm neck, searching for a pulse.

She was gone.

Clarke sank to the damp ground, gasping as her lungs reached desperately for the cool air, then rolled onto her side. Through the tears blurring her vision, she could make out the shapes of people standing all around her, their dark, featureless silhouettes still and quiet.

Her best friend, the only person who truly knew Clarke, who knew what she had done to Lilly and still loved her. Thalia had told her to make things right with Wells tonight—and then Wells
had held Clarke back while they watched Thalia die.

“I’m so sorry, Clarke,” Wells was saying, reaching for her. She pushed his hand away.

“I can’t believe you,” she said, her voice cold and quiet. Rage billowed in her chest, as if there were flames inside her that needed only fury and grief to blaze into an inferno. “There was no way you’d make it,” Wells stammered. “I just—I couldn’t let you go. You would’ve been killed.”

“So you let Thalia die instead. Because you get to decide who lives and who dies.” He started to protest, but she kept going, shaking with rage. “Tonight was a mistake. You destroy everything you touch.”

“Clarke, please, I—”

But she just stood up, shaking the bits of cinder from her clothes, and walked into the forest without looking back.

They all had ash in thhad ash eir lungs and tears in their eyes. But Wells had blood on his hands.

“I’ll get a ring as soon as I find one at the Exchange,” Luke said to Glass, his hand on her lower back as he guided her through the crowded corridors back toward Phoenix. Most of the people who’d assembled to watch the comet were heading back to their residential units on the lower decks, making it difficult to move toward the skybridge. But Glass was hardly aware of which direction they were heading. Her heart was still thumping with joy, and she was shaking, holding tight to Luke’s hand.

“I don’t need a ring.” She reached up to touch the locket, which seemed to be radiating warmth through her chest. Nothing could happen immediately, she knew. Although
she turned eighteen in a few weeks, they couldn’t risk getting married until the Chancellor woke up and confirmed her pardon—or never woke up at all. Her mother would understand eventually, once she saw how much Luke loved Glass. They’d get married and apply for permission to start a family, someday. But for now, just the promise of a future together was enough. “This is perfect.”

They turned out of the stairwell and into the corridor that led to the skybridge. Luke stopped short and pulled Glass to him as a dozen guards jogged by, so close a few of their sleeves brushed against Glass’s arm, although their eyes trained straight ahead. She shivered and leaned into Luke, who was watching them with a strange expression on his face. “Do you know what’s going on?” she asked.

“I’m sure it’s nothing,” Luke said too quickly, his words at odds with the tension in his jaw. But then he raised their interlocked fingers to his lips and kissed her hand. “Let’s go.”

Glass smiled as they continued walking. The thud of the guards’ boots had faded away, and they had the whole hallway to themselves. Suddenly, Luke stopped and raised her arm into the air. Before Glass had time to ask what he was doing, he’d spun her around and lowered her into a dip.

Glass laughed as Luke wrapped one arm around her waist and swept her across the empty hallway. “What’s gotten into you?”

He paused and pulled her even closer to him, then leaned in and murmured into her ear. “I hear music when I’m with you.” Glass just smiled and, in the middle of the hallway, closed her eyes as they swayed from side to side.

Finally, Luke stepped back, gesturing in the direction of the skybridge. “It’s almost curfew,” he said.

“Okay,” she agreed, sighing. They walked hand in hand across the skybridge, exchanging knowing smiles that made every cell in Glass’s body buzz with excitement. At the entrance to Phoenix, they stopped, reluctant to say good-bye. Luke ran his finger along the locket chain.

“I love you,” he said, squeezing her hand before giving her a little shove. “Let me know once you get home. I’ll come by tomorrow to talk to your mom.”

“Okay,” she agreed. “Tomorrow.”

Finally, Glass turned and began walking across the skybridge. She’d made it halfway across when a shrill beep echoed through the empty space. She looked around, startled. The cluster of guards at the Phoenix end of the bridge broke apart, and she could hear someone barking orders. Glass froze as thke sound grew louder and more urgent. She turned to look at Luke, who’d started taking a few hesitant steps forward.

“The bridge is closing,” a disembodied woman’s voice announced over the speakers. “Please clear the area.” There
was a brief pause, then the message repeated. “The bridge is closing. Please clear the area.” Glass gasped as a barrier began to descend at the Phoenix checkpoint. She lunged forward and could see Luke running as well, but they were both too far away.

Glass reached the clear partition just as it locked into the floor, slamming her hands against it. Luke slid to a stop on the other side. He was saying something, but although she could see his mouth moving, no sound reached her ears.

Tears filled her eyes as she watched him bang his fists against the wall in frustration. She didn’t understand. The skybridge hadn’t been closed since the plague outbreak in the first century. She knew if it was closing now, it might not open again.

“Luke!” she cried, the word falling uselessly from her lips. She pressed her hand against the clear partition and held it there. Their eyes locked.

“I love you,” Glass said.

Luke pressed his own hand to the wall, and for a moment, Glass could almost feel the warmth of his skin.
I love you too
, he mouthed. He gave her a sad smile and motioned for her to start walking. She paused, not wanting to leave without knowing what was going on, when she’d see him again. The alarm was still sounding overhead, ringing in her ears.

Go
, Luke mouthed, his face serious.

Glass nodded and turned, forcing herself to keep her eyes straight ahead. But before she turned onto the hallway that led away from the skybridge, she glanced over her shoulder one last time. Luke hadn’t moved. He was still standing there, his hand pressed against the wall.

Glass ran home, weaving through crowds of panicked civilians and stone-faced guards.

“Oh, thank god,” Sonja said as Glass rushed into the flat. “I was so worried.” She shoved a water pitcher into Glass’s arms. “Go fill this up in the bathroom. I’m not sure how much longer the water will last.”

“What’s going on?” Glass asked. “They closed the skybridge.”

“What were you doing near the bridge?” her mother asked, then blinked, taking in the clothes Glass had changed into after the comet viewing party. “Oh,” she said flatly, a wearied understanding overtaking her features. “That’s where you were.”

“What’s happening?” Glass repeated, ignoring her mother’s look of disapproval.

“I’m not sure, but I have a feeling…” She trailed off, then pressed her lips together. “I think this is it. The day we all knew was coming.”

“What are you talking about?”

Her mother took the pitcher back from Glass and turned to the sink. “The ship wasn’t built to last this long. It was just a matter of time before things started to break down.”

The water had reached the top of the pitcher and was now overflowing into the sink, but Sonja just stood there. “Mom?”

Finally, her mother shut off the water and turned around to face Glass. “It’s the airlock,” she said quietly. “There’s been a breach.een a br” A shout rang out from the corridor, and her mother shot a quick glance at the door before she forced a smile and continued. “But don’t worry. There’s a reserve of oxygen on Phoenix. We’ll be okay until they figure out what to do. I promise, Glass, we’ll get through this.”

Glass felt the realization dawning in her mind, twisting her stomach with dread. “What does that have to do with the bridge?” she asked, her voice so quiet it was almost a whisper.

“They’re already running out of oxygen on Arcadia and Walden. We had to take security precautions to make sure…”

“No,” Glass breathed. “The Council is going to let them all
die
?”

Sonj
a stepped forward and squeezed Glass’s arm. “They had to do something, or else no one would survive,” she was saying, but Glass barely registered her words. “It’s the only way to protect the Colony.”

“I have to find him,” Glass said, trembling. She took a
shaky step back. Her head was a frenzy of words and images that bounced off one another, creating more panic than sense.

“Glass,” her mother said, with something that sounded like pity. “I’m so sorry, but you can’t. There’s no way. All the exits are sealed.” She stepped forward and pulled her daughter into a hug. Glass tried to wriggle free, but her mother tightened her hold. “There’s nothing we can do.”

“I love him,” Glass sobbed, her body shaking.

“I know.” Sonja reached out and took Glass’s hand. “And I’m sure he loves you too. But maybe this is for the best.” She gave a sad smile that sent chills down Glass’s spine. “At least this way, you don’t have to say a terrible good-bye.”

Wells watched Clarke stride off into the woods, feeling as if she’d punched through his sternum and torn away a chunk of his heart. He was only vaguely aware of the gleeful roar of the flames as they swallowed the supplies, the tents… and anyone who’d been unfortunate enough to be left inside. Around him, a few people had fallen to the ground, gasping for breath or shaking with horror. But most were standing shoulder to shoulder, facing the inferno, their figures still and quiet.