The Art of Manliness - Manvotionals: Timeless Wisdom and Advice on Living the 7 Manly Virtues (31 page)

CHAPTER SEVEN
HONOR

I
n its most primitive form, honor is simply the status or reputation of a man in the eyes of others. In the past, honor primarily focused on “saving face,” often through the use of violence. If a man tried to diminish your status through insults or physical attacks, you hit back, and hit back hard. Might made right, even if you were in reality the guilty party. In the
Iliad
, Achilles unleashed his wrath on Hector to defend the honor of his fallen friend Patroclus. Up into the late nineteenth century, gentlemen would meet on the “field of honor,” dueling to defend any slight (however petty) another man made towards him or the woman he loved.

But over the millennia, the meaning of honor has changed from being primarily about outward appearances to focusing on a man’s inner qualities. It isn’t enough that others
perceive
a man as being virtuous or truthful, a man must
actually
be good. While vestiges of the primitive form of honor still exist today, honor, for the most part, now means being a man of
integrity.

The word
integrity
is related to the roots of words like
integrate
and
entire
. In Spanish it is rendered
integro
, meaning “whole.” Integrity therefore implies the state of being complete, undivided, intact, and unbroken. We have thus saved this virtue for last because honor pulls and bonds together all the other virtues; it is the mark of a man who has successfully integrated all good principles. His life is a unified whole.

The man of honor is loyal, faithful, and true; he keeps his promises and fulfills his duties. His word is his bond. He does the right thing, even when no one is looking. The man of honor is who he says he is and does what he says he will do. He doesn’t deal in rationalizations or excuses and is always willing to own up and take responsibility for his mistakes and failures. He doesn’t waver when called upon to make the tough choices. He can go to sleep at night with a clear conscience and look at himself in the mirror without flinching. The man of honor knows who he is and where he is going. In short, the honorable man enjoys the supreme confidence and unsurpassed happiness that comes with having every aspect of one’s life knit together in a unity of purpose.

In a world that has lost trust in some of its most sacred and important institutions, honor is the virtue most needed and yet in shortest supply. More than ever, we need men of honor who will step up and stand for truth and right. We hope this final chapter solidifies your desire to integrate the manly virtues more fully into your life and to become a part of the growing movement of men seeking to revive the lost art of manliness.

The Cadet Code defines the “minimum standard of ethical behavior that all cadets have contracted to live by.” Cadets are expected to strive to live the Spirit of the Code, which goes beyond this standard to encompass a life of full honor and integrity. The three rules of thumb are designed to help cadets decide whether an action is honorable or not.

“A cadet will not lie, cheat, steal, or tolerate those who do.”

a. Does this action attempt to deceive anyone or allow anyone to be deceived?

b. Does this action gain or allow the gain of privilege or advantage to which I or someone else would not otherwise be entitled?

c. Would I be satisfied by the outcome if I were on the receiving end of this action?

The Boy Scouts of America have been pledging the same oath and striving to live the same law for one hundred years.

A Scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, and reverent.

The oath taken by King Arthur and his band of noble knights, as imagined by Howard Pyle in his retelling of their legendary tales.

Then all the knights arose, and each knight held up before him the cross of the hilt of his sword, and each knight spake word for word as King Arthur spake. And this was the covenant of their Knighthood of the Round Table: That they would be gentle unto the weak; that they would be courageous unto the strong; that they would be terrible unto the wicked and the evil-doer; that they would defend the helpless who should call upon them for aid; that all women should be held unto them sacred; that they would stand unto the defence of one another whensoever such defence should be required; that they would be merciful unto all men; that they would be gentle of deed, true in friendship, and faithful in love. This was their covenant, and unto it each knight sware upon the cross of his sword, and in witness thereof did kiss the hilt thereof.

F
ROM
T
HE
S
UCCESSFUL
M
AN IN
H
IS
M
ANIFOLD
R
ELATIONS
W
ITH
L
IFE
, 1886
By J. Clinton Ransom

Passing along the paths of a cemetery and reading the inscriptions upon the tombstones, one is impressed with the fact that men are soon forgotten when they die. They are laid to rest and their names chronicled upon slabs and statues to mark the place where they lie. But the statues do not preserve their names any more than they do the lifeless limbs slowly crumbling to dust beneath. Only one, or perhaps two, in a thousand dead will live in the memory of those who come after. Only these are deemed worthy to have their names written upon the page of history. The other countless dead are all forgotten almost as soon as the grass grows green upon their graves. The few live on in worthy deeds, the many die because there is nothing to live for. This persistence of worthy living in the memory of men is a good illustration of the eternal persistence of character. In life, people never fully understand the workings of this law.

But character is only the final result of life. It is the end attained after life’s activities are over. It is the culmination of principle carried into deeds. It has been forming since we drew our first breath, and shall be forming until the dews of death have fallen upon the eyelids. And at last the character is the measure of the man. All that a man is and does; his habits and appetites; his imaginings, reasonings and memories; his faith, his hope, his love, are blended together in character, as wires are sometimes united under a trip-hammer into a bar of steel.

Character is, then, a blending of many elements, a composite growth of principle, action and sentiment, and when complete it represents that which is permanent in the life of a man. Then character comes to have a reflex action upon life; its effect is cumulative and tends to become settled in certain fixed lines of principle and duty. It is this that makes character the final test of manhood, and gives it a value in successful life; for when these lines of duty are once definitely marked out the man does not easily depart from them, and men come to have confidence in his integrity and ability. When a man has shown that he acts right under a given emergency, such is our confidence in this permanence of character, that we instinctively believe that he will continue to act rightly to the end of life. Good character then is a priceless possession and the best possible exponent of a good and honorable career. It is, indeed, according to the stability and might of this character that one succeeds or fails. No matter how ingenuous the toil of labor, or how transcendent the accomplishment to one of trivial character, if there be no force behind them, both are thrown away and wasted. Character is the force behind the keen-edged tools that accomplishes the work. If it be founded upon principles of eternal truth, it is well.