The Bad Judgment Series: The Complete Series (25 page)

“
A
re
you sure you trust this guy?” I asked Walker. We were holding hands and walking down Melcher Street in the heat of midday, heading towards downtown. Being this close to my old office, the law firm of Proctor & Buchanan, LLC, was making me nervous.

That wasn’t the only thing that was making me nervous.

“Trust him?” Walker asked. “I don’t trust anyone except you. But we’ve run out of options, Nic.”

“That’s a massive understatement,” I said.

“I love it when you say the word
massive
,” Walker said, and smiled at me. Desire rushed through me when he looked at me like that, making me blush.

“It reminds of the good old days,” he said. “Well, they were sort of good — we were in my nice, clean house. That was good. But you wouldn’t sleep with me. That was bad.”

I shook my head at him. “I think we’ve made up for lost time,” I said, and we both laughed. We’d had to tear ourselves out of bed this morning to go meet Levi; every chance we got, we’d been exploring each other’s bodies. I’d had more orgasms this past week than I’d ever had combined, in my whole life. I felt myself blush even more furiously just from thinking about it.

I’d officially crossed the line with my client. I’d crossed the line so many times, in so many ways, that my Massachusetts Bar Admission certificate had probably burst into flames back in my old office.

My old office.
Thinking about it made me feel so strange. The last time we’d been there, I’d almost rejoined the firm. David Proctor had offered me so much money I couldn’t see straight. And then, in a moment of clarity, I’d doubted him. And I’d handed that file to Mandy.

And now poor Mandy was dead.

I sighed, an aching, guilt-ridden sadness washing over me. That car had been meant for
me
. Mandy had taken my place and I would never, could never get back to that moment where I could save her. That moment where I could warn the driver. And the poor man who’d delivered our pizza, shot because someone wanted my information. I couldn’t make it right. I couldn’t go back and save any of them.

So I was just going to have to avenge them.

Adrenaline surged through me at the thought, and all my senses were heightened. We were getting closer to downtown with each step and the crowd was starting to thicken around us. We kept close to the inside corner of the sidewalk, near the buildings, so that we could press our backs against the walls if we needed to. So at least part of us was protected. Walker had taught me to do that.

I squinted at the people on the sidewalk, scanning their faces, wondering if any of them were a threat. Walker looked straight ahead now, his hand clamped over mine in an iron-like grip. I knew he was watching, too, ready to protect us, ready to throw himself in front of me if anyone moved towards us.

Could we be recognized right now?
I wondered. We looked different than the images they were using on the news, but was it different enough? I was still five-foot-six and I still had the same face. My hair was short and bleached blond now, spiky with gel, and I was dressed very differently, but still….

The people who were looking for us weren’t going to be easily fooled.

Walker strode beside me, his powerful chest jutting forward, his shoulders massive and his enormous biceps on full display in his tank top. He was probably the real problem. The giveaway. All six-foot-two of his gloriousness could not be disguised by a buzz cut and cheap sunglasses. I felt certain that he could be recognized by his biceps alone.

But as far as we knew, we weren’t being followed. There’d been no sign of the Range Rover or the Lexus, the blond soccer mom or the lanky man with the dog. And no sign of anybody else — anybody that we could see, anyway. We’d been hiding in plain sight for the past week. No cellphones, no internet, no going out in public. What little we’d seen of the news was on the boxy television in the threadbare apartment we’d rented in Southie; it only got two local stations, but that was enough. We knew they were looking for us — federal agents, local police, and Lord knew who else — so we’d been extremely careful, only going out at night to run to the corner market and once to a superstore in Dorchester to buy a prepaid phone.

Walker had used that phone to call Levi. But we couldn’t call his sister, Adrian, and we couldn’t call my father. It was too dangerous, for them and for us. I hoped that my old friend, Attorney Mimi Johnstone, followed through on her threat and called Richie when I hadn’t called her back; I had no idea what she could say to make it better, but it would still be a comfort to him.

I didn’t know what the people we’d left behind were thinking. On the news, they said that Walker and I might have set off the bomb as a distraction so that we could escape. They said there was evidence that we’d been planning something, that we were having an affair and were trying to run away together. There were reports that I’d taken a flight from Boston to Las Vegas and that Walker had just vanished, his GPS bracelet briefly disabled and left in the men’s room at Logan Airport. That bathroom was stormed by Federal agents and Federal Marshals not too long after we’d left.

We’d also seen the footage of the scene outside of my law firm after the bomb went off. Swarms of police and emergency workers were trying to clean up the mess. Then there were scenes of the airport being partially shut down and swamped with officers. That was the one piece of luck we’d had. Everyone — including the people who’d been following us — had been so busy with the explosion that we’d had a precious few minutes to make a plan and escape. So I bought a one-way ticket to Vegas that I had no plans to use, and Walker turned off the GPS on his bracelet for one nanosecond, slid it off, and stuck it in the men’s room.

Of course, to call it luck, with Mandy and the driver dead…well, none of it was
good
luck.

But still. We’d had that brief window and we’d used it to run. On foot, no cellphones…just the cash that we pooled between us, which admittedly wasn’t much. We had just enough to rent the crappy apartment for the week and buy some food. But that was it. That was it, and we didn’t dare use a credit card or try to get money out of one of our accounts.

I finally had a boyfriend who was a billionaire and I was the poorest I’d been since law school.

My mind went back to the people we’d left behind. Richie, Tammy, Adrian, Mimi…I even briefly thought of Alexa. The people we loved, what did
they
believe? I wondered if they were worried if we were alive…if we were in danger…if we were ever coming back.

I wondered if they were worried that we might be guilty.

“This is it,” Walker said, motioning with his chin towards a cafe and breaking me out of my reverie. He looked around briefly and squeezed my hand. “Levi is sort of a weird guy. He’s been living off the grid for a while. But he’s going to help us, and I don’t think he’ll talk afterwards. That’s what matters.” Even though his comments sounded casual, he looked tense. This was the first time we’d met someone from the outside world since everything had happened.

“It’ll be okay,” I said. I hoped.

“As long as I keep you safe, it will be,” he said. “I can handle just about anything else that comes our way.” He pulled me through the doors to the busy cafe; Levi had suggested that we meet him on a Tuesday, during lunch time, when a lot of people would be around. He’d told Walker that we’d be safer then, less noticeable. I hoped that Levi was just weird and not crazy. I also hoped he was right.

Walker guided me towards a corner table where a lone man was sitting. He was wearing a blue-checkered shirt that matched his cloudy blue eyes. His hair was light brown, shaggy, and hung over his collar a little. He looked too young to look as old as he did. He saw us and smiled, and the smile changed his face, making the lines that crisscrossed it seem pleasant instead of sad.

“It’s been a long time,” Levi said, standing up and shaking Walker’s hand.

“It’s been years,” Walker said, and clapped him on the shoulder.

Levi turned to me. “You must be the lawyer,” he said quietly. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m not going to use your names since I shouldn’t. And I won’t use your new ones ‘cause you don’t know them yet.”

We all sat down, an uneasy silence at our table, in contrast to the lunchtime bustle around us. I wondered what my new name was going to be and, rather stupidly, if Walker was going to like it.

“Did you buy us lunch?” Walker asked. I could hear some hope in his voice. We hadn’t been eating well this last week — dinners had been boxed macaroni and cheese or pasta with cheap, sugary marinara sauce from a jar. I heard his stomach rumble and I reached over and rubbed his back. Levi watched me carefully, but I didn’t care.

“No time for lunch,” Levi said. “You should probably get used to roughing it a little, buddy. I’m sure it’s been a while since you had to skip a meal.”

“I’m adjusting,” Walker said, and his stomach gave one last, desperate snarl. “Are you still moving around a lot?” he asked, changing the subject, studiously not watching the people carrying large, delicious looking salads and sandwiches to their tables.

“I never stop,” Levi said. “I prefer the mobile lifestyle.”

“I remember,” Walker said and smiled at him. A look passed between them and I wondered what they knew about each other. Walker had said that they’d served together on a tour of Serbia, but he hadn’t gone into more detail.

“I expect that you’re going to have to go mobile soon, too,” Levi said.

“As soon as we’re out of here,” Walker said, taking me by surprise. I knew it was going to be soon, but I didn’t know it was going to be
now
.

Levi pushed an envelope across the table to us. “This doesn’t have anything but a key and a set of instructions,” he said. “It’s to a safe deposit box. Everything you requested is in there.”

“So I’m going to pay you lots of money — lots and
lots
of money when I can get it — and you’re giving me a key? And that’s it?”

“Yup,” Levi said. He leaned back and crossed his arms across his chest. “You’re going to have to trust me.”

“I understand that. I just don’t know if I can,” Walker said.

“Well, I’m taking an IOU from you, and that’s good enough for me,” Levi said. “Think of that key as an IOU. I owe you my loyalty. I’m not going to tell anyone that I saw you. The government is offering a reward, but I’m not interested. There’s no such thing as a free lunch, you know what I mean, buddy? I’m done with my service. You, I’ll make an exception for.”

“So my money is good enough for you, but not the government’s?” Walker asked.

“That’s right,” Levi said.

“I hope that doesn’t change,” Walker said, taking the envelope.

“I don’t see it changing anytime soon. Or ever,” Levi said, and his face was back to looking lined and tired. “The papers should be good. I couldn’t get you a credit card or anything, but you have licenses and some other stuff. I left you a present in there, too.”

“Thanks, Levi.”

“You’re welcome. You need to read the paper in that envelope — it gives you the name to use to get into the box. I named you as a co-renter, but I didn’t use your real name. And I didn’t use your new name. I left my new number for you in there, too. I tossed my phone after you called,” Levi said.

We all stood up and the guys shook hands. “Good luck. And get the hell out of here soon,” he said, motioning to Walker. “It’s too obvious you’re you. You’re eminently recognizable.”

I sighed and watched Levi as he sauntered out; from a distance, he looked casual and relaxed.

“We need to go. Now,” Walker said, grabbing my hand and squeezing it. “We have more to do than I thought.”

“
T
his is
for a bank close to here,” Walker said, looking at the paper Levi had given us. He looked around the crowded street.

“I think we need to wear hats, or something,” I said nervously. “I’m starting to freak out that we’re out here in plain sight. And you’re eminently recognizable, like Levi said.”

He laughed and in the light of midday, I saw how the lines in his face had deepened since we’d met. “Levi always could turn a phrase.”

“I didn’t expect him to have a vocabulary that included the word ‘eminent,’” I said. “What’s he like, anyway? I mean, he seemed nice….”

“I’ll tell you later,” Walker said. “Right now, we need to be ‘eminently’ unrecognizable and we need to get our stuff from the safe-deposit box. Then get the hell out of here.”

I saw a kiosk across the street, next to the bridge that led to downtown Boston. I tugged on Walker’s hand and we went over. He got a green
Celtics
hat and I selected a black
Bruins
one, using the last of the cash that I had in my pocket.

“What are we going to do if Levi just screwed us over?” I asked, panicking, thinking about the amount of money I had left — which was none. And Walker had mentioned he had about eight dollars remaining.

“I know him. He wouldn’t do that,” Walker said. He was reading the note from Levi. He folded it back up and turned to me. “But if this doesn’t work out, there are other options.”

“Like what?” I asked. I wasn’t aware of any other options, and I didn’t like the tone of his voice. It was dark and edgy. And rebellious.

“Later, Nic. We’ll talk about it later,” he shushed me. “Keep your head down.”

We made it to the bank, which was located one block past the bridge, right at the beginning of the Financial District. We waited for a teller and when it was our turn, I felt a cold sweat start to run in rivulets down my back. I tried to be normal like Walker was being. He took his sunglasses off but kept his hat pulled low when he spoke to the teller. He also slouched, which he never did in real life; it distorted his posture and his height. I didn’t know what to do besides sweat, so I just looked at the ground.

“The name on the account?” the teller asked.

“William Gray,” Walker said, casually.

“Okay, Mr. Gray,” she said, and she seemed calm, professional and slightly bored. Not at all suspicious. “Go back through those gold doors. The safety deposit boxes are on the right, listed numerically. There are separate rooms back there so you can view the contents privately.”

She was innocuous, polite. I truly hoped that she didn’t recognize us from the news and wasn’t pressing a secret buzzer somewhere, alerting the authorities to our presence. I continued to sweat as Walker grabbed my hand and led me through the doors. I knew he was watching everyone, taking everything in, but he appeared normal, casual in his Celtics hat, tank top and cargo shorts.

I was going to have to take some lessons in casual from him. My heart was pounding and my breathing was harsh. He squeezed my hand, sensing my discomfort. “It’s okay,” he said quietly, while he was searching for the number that matched the key. He found the box and pulled it out, then motioned to a curtained-off room in the corner. We went in and closed the curtain behind us, not speaking. I felt certain that we were being recorded by the bank’s surveillance. Probably all the other customers were, too.

We just happened to be a little more interesting than all the other customers.

Walker unlocked the box. Inside was a large plastic bag that held all of the contents; he peered inside without taking it all out. He pawed through it for a second and removed a neatly folded canvas bag. He unfolded it and placed all of the contents directly inside. We could look through it back at the apartment, where it was safe. Or safer, at least.

He grabbed the bag and my hand. We left the bank without looking back. The whole way home, I was worried that there were eyes on us. It was our first visit back to civilization, and it had left me rattled.

“
F
ive thousand dollars
. That’s it,” Walker said, counting the money again.

“That’s not enough?” I asked, trying to sound encouraging and failing by a mile.

He looked up at me, his eyebrows raised over the blue eyes that already knew me too well. “Don’t play dumb, Nic. You can’t pull it off.”

“Well, I know we can’t get very far on just five thousand dollars,” I admitted. “What else did he give us?”

“Papers for both of us, including licenses and passports. They say we’re from Florida; we can memorize everything on them in a little bit. I’m William White and you’re Vera White.”

“We’re
married
?” I practically squealed, and then I clapped my hand over my mouth.

He looked at me and grinned. “Yes, Mrs. White. I’m sorry the honeymoon isn’t going to turn out quite how we planned.”

“Ha-ha,” I said, recovering myself. “What else do we have?”

“Two guns. Two TracFones. A laptop. A note, which says that he stripped the laptop of any location services. But that it still gets internet. Fuck that,” Walker said. He picked up the computer and smashed it on the ground. I jumped at the noise. Then he took out a small metal piece from within it and smashed it on the countertop with a pan, breaking it into smithereens. I jumped again, but he didn’t even flinch.

“I know my tracking,” Walker said. “Any internet and they could find us.”

“You should tell Levi that,” I said.

“He should have known better,” Walker said. “He’s been off the grid for a long time. Maybe he’s just getting lazy in his advanced age. Or maybe he doesn’t have enough people chasing him.”

“Or maybe he’s trying to get us caught?” I asked, worried.

“I doubt it. Levi has no love of the government. It’s more likely that he thought he did everything to strip it. But being in the business, I happen to know it’s not enough. Anything that connects to a satellite, they’re going to be able to find us, eventually.”

My mouth went dry. Whenever he talked about
eventually
, I had no idea of what was coming before that. “Are we safe right now?” I asked.

He looked at me and smiled. “Nic, you haven’t been safe since you met me. But unless Levi told someone about us, no one knows about the computer he gave us.” He stated cleaning up the pieces of the laptop from the floor.

My stomach churned again. “Walker,” I said, trying to keep my voice light, “when do you think this is all going to be over?”

“When I hurt everyone who’s hurt you,” Walker said. “And everyone who’s tried to tear apart my company, my family. My life.”

“What do you mean by hurt, exactly?” I asked. I had no love of the people who’d killed Mandy and the others. I wanted justice. But could I kill people? Could I aim one of the guns that Levi had given us and shoot it at someone? Even if they were a killer?

I didn’t know the answers to those questions. And I didn’t want to find out.

“I don’t know what I mean by it, yet,” Walker said, studying my face closely. “But I can promise you, you might not want to be around when I figure it out.”

“Please stop saying things like that.”

“Like what?” he asked. He was checking the chambers in one of the guns. Watching him with it gave me the chills. His hands moved over the weapon with skilled assurance and absolutely no fear or apprehension. It was the opposite of how I would touch a gun.

“Like we’re going to be separated. Like you’re going to leave me, and try to do this alone,” I said.

He looked up at me and there was a flash of dark pain on his face. “I
should
do this alone. You’re too good for this sort of stuff. You’re innocent, Nic. You’re young. You got dragged into this by accident.”

“It’s no accident,” I said. I’d told him that I loved him so many times, and he’d said it back…but I wondered sometimes if he understood how much I meant it. I’d left behind my whole world — my apartment, my family, all of my obligations — to be with him.

It was the biggest risk I’d ever taken, and I’d never been one to gamble.

I went over to him and tentatively ran my hands over his bristly head. He buried his face in my shirt, and although I relished the closeness, I could feel the remorse rolling off him in waves. “Just don’t say things like that anymore,” I whispered. “I made a choice. I chose to be with you. Don’t try to undo it.”

I saw a mixture of guilt, longing, and sadness on his face. Then he gave up and just looked sheepish. “I can’t say no to you when you’re touching me,” he said, hugging me back, breaking the tension. “I become useless. As soon as I can feel you, I melt.”

I laughed too, but it was a little ragged. He must have heard it in my voice, because he raised himself up and pulled me tenderly into his chest. “What a sucky time for me to fall in love,” he said. “I finally meet the right person, and now I’m putting her in mortal danger.” He kissed the top of my head and I let myself relax a little against him, feeling his arms around me.

“You have to promise me,” I mumbled, my face still buried in his chest. “I mean it, Walker. I can’t do this if I feel like you’re going to pull the rug out from under me and leave me behind.”

He released me, taking a reluctant step back. “Nic, you have to understand a couple of things,” he said, sitting back down at the table. I made a sound in protest, but he held up his hand, stopping me. “First of all, I can’t change how I feel about this — these people are after
me
. I am the problem, here. Mandy is dead because of me, and so are those other people. The government is after my technology. Lester Max and your firm may or may not be involved in this because they are after my money. Those people who were following us were after me. Not you. Can you at least admit that?”

“Yes, but….”

“There aren’t any buts to what I’m saying,” he said. “I need you to understand how guilty this makes me feel. I feel like
shit
, Nicole. Because this is my fault, all of it. And I can’t ask you to leave.” He looked at me for a beat and ran his hands over his shaved head. “I should leave you behind, and I can’t. Because I love you. And that selfish fact is putting you in even more danger.”

“Well, I love you too, and I don’t want to leave. So it’s a non-issue,” I said.

“But it’s not,” he said, and now he sounded miserable. “I’m doing the wrong thing here, and I know it. If something happens to you because of me, I’ll never forgive myself. You should leave, Nicole. You should run far away from me. I’ve brought nothing but trouble to you. You’re brilliant. You’re supposed to have a long and illustrious career. And I’m taking that from you. Every second you’re here with me, every second that the authorities and God knows who else is looking for us, is time I’m taking away from you and your normal life. And maybe you won’t ever be able to go back.

“It’s wrong. It’s wrong and I’m the one doing it to you. You’re not supposed to do bad things to people you love.”

I sighed and grabbed his hand. “Walker, I understand what you’re saying. But it’s shortsighted.” He looked up at me and raised his eyebrows and I raised mine right back at him. “I understand that our situation’s…risky. But it’s better than the alternative. Do you know what would happen if I went back? I’d be in Federal custody before I even put the key in my lock. And they’d question me, interrogate me, and I wouldn’t talk, and my career would be over for sure.

“Now, let’s say you had spared me all the trouble, and just left me back at the airport while you ran and hid. Do you know where I’d be?” I asked him. I could feel the adrenaline rolling through me as I warmed to the topic.

“I wouldn’t be in Vegas, that’s for sure. I never would have made it through security. I’d probably be dead by now. David or Norris or the blonde in the Range Rover would have arranged my execution nicely. Maybe with a bomb. Or maybe with something a little less ostentatious, like a gun fitted with a silencer. Or a knife.” I watched as he shuddered.

“Stop,” he said.

“No,” I said, and instead of fear, it was anger that had me shaking. Anger at the people who’d done this. “If you want to feel guilty about something, feel guilty that the people who tried to kill me are still out there, free. Feel guilty that they’re between us right now. Feel guilty that Mandy’s dead and people think we’re responsible for it. We can’t let them win, Walker. We can’t let them take everything.

“The most dangerous thing for us would be to be separated,” I said, quietly. “They already tried to kill me. If they got me now, they’d just torture me, first.”

He looked up at me, his eyes dark. “I just want to go back in time. So I could do something different, so that this didn’t all happen to you. And I didn’t ruin your life,” he said.

“You didn’t ruin my life,” I said. I was pretty sure I’d only been living a half-life until I’d met him. Some part of me had woken up, filled with desire and determination, since we’d been together. “I wouldn’t go back, even if I could. I chose
you
, Walker. As far as I’m concerned, it was meant to be.”

“Nicole.” He pulled me onto his lap and held my face in his hands. “The part where we’re together —
that
was meant to be. The part where you almost got blown up because you were helping me? The part where you’re throwing your life and career away because people want to ruin me? I can’t believe that’s part of the plan,” he said.

“It’s only the beginning part,” I said, trying to sound cautiously optimistic. “We have to see what happens next.”

He gave me a lopsided smile and then tentatively kissed me. I wrapped my arms and legs around him and kissed him back, not tentatively at all, and I felt him stir beneath me.

“Well,
I
know what happens next,” he said, and he sounded more like his normal self. “But seriously — I’m yours for as long as you’ll have me,” he said, tucking my hair behind my ear. “Now please, will you have me? And will you be on top? I feel like I need to let you have a little control….”

He picked me up and carried me over to the bed. I tried to climb on top of him, but he gently grabbed my wrists and moved on top of me.