The Barn House (30 page)

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Authors: Ed Zotti

BOOK: The Barn House
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I had nothing to do with the block party, but I knew a few of the people involved in organizing it. Many were graduates of the University of Notre Dame or St. Mary's College, its neighbor in South Bend, Indiana.
Growing up, I confess it had never quite sunk in that Notre Dame was in Chicago's orbit.
82
I realize this bespeaks a certain obliviousness on my part. I had of course heard of Notre Dame, Ara Parseghian, and the golden dome; I'd seen
Knute Rockne: All-American
, with Pat O'Brien and Ronald Reagan. Just for that reason, I thought of the school as a remote national icon, like the Washington Monument or Fort Knox. This impression was undoubtedly reinforced by the fact that Notre Dame was in Indiana, which Chicagoans from childhood (to be precise, from their first car trip to Michigan) regard as a primitive backwater on a par with Chad or, perhaps more aptly, the desolate reaches of eastern Germany—a wilderness of swamps, rusting industrial infrastructure, and deserted towns, overhung by a stench that would kill a goat.
83
South Bend, it's true, was a pleasant enough hamlet well beyond the most toxic industrial zone, but that only heightened the sense of antipodean isolation. My mother had taken me on an excursion to Notre Dame when I was nine or ten; it might as well have been on the banks of the Seine.
I was obliged to take a different view of things on graduating from college and settling on the north side. Domers, as Notre Dame alumni called themselves, were an inescapable part of the Chicago social scene—far more so than graduates of my alma mater, Northwestern, or the University of Chicago. This stemmed in large part from their indomitable will to party, which Lord knows wasn't a major motivator for the U. of C. Maroons.
Sociability, of course, isn't unusual among the collegiate set; what distinguished the Domers was their ability to put it on a commercial basis. At some point during the 1980s I became acquainted with what I thought of as the boat people, the nucleus of which consisted of two Notre Dame graduates who shortly after moving to Chicago had begun entertaining themselves and their many friends by organizing parties. Several of the more memorable events were held on rented boats, which spent the evening plying the local waterways. Cruise boats in Chicago were not then numerous. As I heard the story, which may have been colored a bit by beer, the principals found themselves beneath a table toward the end of one of these revels and vowed to establish a boat company so they could have waterborne junkets whenever they felt like it. A week later, sobriety evidently having done nothing to diminish the charm of this notion, they flew down to Florida to inspect a boat they eventually bought. A year or two after that they commissioned the construction of a custom party . . . well, yacht would be putting things too grandly, but it was a nice little craft. In 1987, Mary and I, by no means party people, nonetheless thought it would be a hoot to get married on this vessel.
84
Today cruise boats in Chicago constitute a sizable fleet.
These were the people Jack Wall had enlisted to help revive his tumbledown parish. They were well suited to the task, and not just because of their proclivity for parties. If gays and artists were the shock troops of gentrification, Domers were the occupying army. They filled entire apartment buildings in downtown Chicago. (Well, maybe not entire buildings, but I know of one where they were so numerous it was commonly known as the dorm.)
A few Notre Dame alums didn't merely live in downtown apartments, they built them. In the mid-1980s a large downtown housing project had been constructed a couple blocks from Old St. Patrick's by a team of local developers, one of whom was a former Notre Dame football star. The venture was a typical Chicago production from beginning to end, involving massive public subsidies, a mortgage default, and years of protests after the developers tried to evade federal rules requiring that some apartments be set aside for low-income tenants (they coughed up a few in the end).
But eventually the buildings filled up. Virtually no one had lived in the area previously; now it was home to several thousand people, at least a few of whom were children. In 1989, Father Wall hired a Roman Catholic sister named Mary Ellen Caron to begin preschool and kindergarten classes for thirty-five youngsters in two rooms in one of the apartment towers. The school grew with surprising speed. By the time we enrolled our kids just five years later, more than four hundred students attended and classes were being held in multiple buildings—some preschool classes were conducted in a former Catholic high school on the near north side that had shut down a few years previously. Starting a few days after we moved into the Barn House, Mary had been taking Ryan and Ani there each morning on the L, after which she continued downtown to work.
The school was everything we could have hoped for, with a bright, enthusiastic staff, a well-thought-out curriculum, and an exemplary commitment to diversity. Though the majority of children in the school came from upper-middle-class families, the most popular kid in preschool was Francisco, whose parents were cops—the dad, a mounted patrolman, rode over on his horse one day and let the kids pet it.
I ought to emphasize that Father Wall, a deeply religious man, was trying to attract people back to the church in organizing the school and other parish programs, and hadn't had as his primary aim the resuscitation of Chicago. That was just how it worked out. I should also clarify that not everyone who played an important role in the resurgence of the parish and its school was a Domer, Irish, or in some cases even Catholic. (The original group organizing the world's largest block party, for example, had gone to Marquette University, a Jesuit school in Milwaukee.) Better simply to credit the city-guy mafia. The essential fact remains that, at a time in our lives when our children's education had become a matter of urgent concern, and the thought of the suburbs might have wafted through our minds, a first-class school had materialized out of thin air. The speed with which things had come together evidently surprised Father Wall, too. Without really meaning to, and with no scheme of empire in mind, he had tapped into Chicago's formidable Irish Catholic-dominated establishment. An early effort to attract young adults involved asking prominent Chicago Catholics to speak on the role of faith in their lives; you can guess where that led. The mayor and his wife became supporters of the school at an early stage, sent their kids there, and were honorary cochairs of the school's annual fund-raiser—we watched with fascination during the silent auction as a clutch of real estate developers outbid one another to join the mayor's foursome for a round of golf. (The winning bid, if memory serves, was upwards of $10,000, a small sum in some circles but impressive in Chicago.)
The school, eventually renamed the Frances Xavier Warde Schools and popularly known as FXW, was the first real indication we had that trying to raise a family in the city might not be the nightmare we had feared. We became friendly with the parents of our children's classmates. Some were rehabbers like us; others lived downtown, either in lakefront high-rises or new close-in residential developments, many built on old railroad yards. Some were professionals; one couple owned a legendary Italian lemonade stand on the west side not far from our old town house. Quite a few, it occurs to me now, were traders.
We were fortunate the school thing was working out, because the house still monopolized much of my attention. In November the floor finishers showed up. We moved out while they were at work, having been warned that the noise and dust were intolerable, but I returned each day to the house to move radiators and such and keep an eye on things. As always, the workers were Polish, although these men weren't the same breed as the carpenters—anyway, the firm's owner wasn't. He showed up on the first day accompanied by a much younger blonde in a fur coat, tight jeans, and high-heeled boots, evidence to my eye of a different set of priorities. He spoke minimal English, but his manner suggested that a certain amount of time had been allotted for the project and delays wouldn't be cheerfully brooked.
It was my project and my money, of course, and I indicated via Tony, who was on hand to translate, that certain repairs were essential. Assurances were duly made, but after the bosses departed it was just me and four men whose English was mainly limited to
okay
and
reparation
, which I took to mean “repair.” With hand gestures I managed to communicate with the group's carpenter, who turned out to be an adherent of the right way—one learned to recognize the brethren through secret signs, in the manner of early Christians—and we got as much done as we could.
It helped that I'd planned ahead. In the front hall, for example, there were those two large holes cut in the handsome heart-pine flooring for heating registers, then inelegantly patched with mismatching wood after the registers were removed. Early on I'd noticed that a peninsula of heart-pine planking extended from the front hall a few feet into the rear hall, presumably a vestige of some forgotten room reconfiguration. Soon after the commencement of work I'd had the peninsula sawed off even with the hall doorway and the excess planking removed and stored. Now I had the flooring-crew carpenter use the salvaged material to replace the ugly patches, which he did with admirable precision. When later refinished, the patched sections were indistinguishable from the rest of the floor.
Once repairs in a given room were complete, sanding immediately commenced using massive floor sanders having the appearance of vacuum cleaners designed by the Russian army. Fat cables sprouting from the handles trailed across the floor and down the basement steps. A friend experienced in such matters had warned me not to inspect the electrical hookup:
You don't want to know
. But of course I did. I found that the floor guys had removed the front cover from the main electrical panel and jammed giant screwdrivers into the 240-volt terminal blocks above the main breaker; the sander cables were hooked to the screwdrivers with enormous alligator clips. The nearest circuit protection was in the alley; an accident would not only vaporize one or more floor guys, it'd kill the power to half the neighborhood. I retreated back up the steps.
The final step in finishing was applying stain and varnish. I'd selected a common stain called golden oak. Calling me over to consult, the floor guys gave me to understand that they thought the color was a little dark—they wanted to know if I wanted to dilute it with mineral spirits.
Sure
, I said. They mixed up a batch and poured some on a section of newly sanded floor. It looked like India ink. Did I approve? They might as well have been brain surgeons asking my opinion of the sutures.
Go ahead
, I said, hoping not to be appalled. Once rubbed in—the process was extraordinarily fast—the stain proved to be indeed dark, but not objectionably so. Charlie, who visited later, went further: “It's perfect,” he said. Though I had had the impression of having narrowly avoided disaster throughout, when the job was complete I had to confess the workmanship was impeccable.
 
Y
ou'll excuse me, but we have a few practical matters we need to discuss before proceeding further:
■ Something we didn't realize till too late during our work on the radiators was that there had been a simple solution to our problem heating up the larger pipes, had we been alert enough to notice it. MAPP gas—the letters stand for methylacetylenepropadiene—is a hydrocarbon mixture with a higher combustion temperature than propane, making it much easier to sweat a joint. Cheap and safe, MAPP gas is sold in the same aisle in the home improvement store as propane and comes in bright yellow cans—they could scarcely have been more conspicuous if I'd tripped on one. I'm consoled by the thought that, had I known about such things at the outset and so avoided the trials here described, this would be a pretty boring book.
 
■ Admirer of radiators though I am, I admit they have a significant drawback: They make for a dry house during heating season, which among other things manifests itself in staticky rugs, dry skin, gaps in the floor planking, and pianos that go quickly out of tune. When I was a kid my mother sought to rectify these problems by hanging humidifiers behind the radiators in our house, skinny open-topped metal tanks filled with water that evaporated when the radiator heated up. How well these worked I can't say, because we never remembered to fill them. Portable electric room humidifiers have the advantage of bright lights and noise to remind the forgetful but still need refilling at short intervals, making one long for the simplicity of the auto-filling humidifiers used on forced-air systems. I've read about auto-filling ductless central humidifiers that supposedly work on the basis of Dalton's law of partial pressures, which is a grandiose way of saying the humidity spreads around the house on its own, but I can't say from personal knowledge that it actually does. All of which is to say I don't have a solution for this vexing issue, so be prepared to deal.
 
■ Two things you need to know about paint. First, only the uninformed, or those without children, use flat interior paint, because while it may initially hide the defects of your lumpy and irregular walls, it shows every fingerprint thereafter and can't easily be cleaned. Paint having a slight sheen to it—one manufacturer calls its semi-shiny finish “pearl”—washes up much more readily. Second, for exteriors you want 100 percent acrylic paint. Painting your wooden siding won't be any cheaper, but at least you won't have to do it every three years.
 
■ I'm not saying it ought to be a major design driver, but home appraisers often have the idea that a room must have a closet for it to count as a bedroom. In fact there's no national standard and many older houses have closetless rooms where people routinely sleep, but if you don't put in closets when you have the chance, don't be surprised if you get an argument later.
 
■ I've intimated this a couple times already, but now state it as scientific fact: Whereas everyone notices the difference between an eight-foot ceiling and nine-foot ceiling, thinking the former ordinary and the latter luxurious, hardly anyone notices the difference between a nine-foot ceiling and a ten-foot one. This means you can drop a ten-foot ceiling ten or twelve inches to accommodate pipes and ducts in the serene confidence that no one will know. I acknowledge this falls into the category of things most people don't need to be told. I just wish someone had told me.

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