The Bastard (9 page)

Because
Concepcion
was so thin, the child she carried distorted her body by the fourth month. Diarmid moved to another bedroom, telling her it was for the child's sake. By the sixth
month
she looked so grotesque he could hardly bear the sight of her and her touch sickened him.

On the first Sunday of November, Manuelo left for
San Diego
and his wedding, planning to bring his bride back with him at the end of the month. Don Francisco was in
Mexico City
with his sister.
Diarmid,
deprived of both the don's and Manuelo's company, grew progressively more irritable and distraught. Finally, unable to bear his situation any longer, he decided he must rid himself of
Concepcion
.

The first step was to remove her from the rancho on some pretext
she'd
believe was only temporary. Once she was gone,
he'd
make certain she didn't return. On the third Sunday of November, he asked her to join him in the don's study.

"I want you to visit your father," Diarmid told her as soon as
she'd
maneuvered
her swollen body into a chair. "I won't be able to come along."

Concepcion
's eyes widened. "You're asking me to leave you?
To go without you to El Cuidad de Mexico?"

"Think of the child. There are doctors in
Mexico
City
,
you won't have to depend on an old midwife like
Rosa
."

"I trust
Rosa
with my life!"

Diarmid sighed. "That's not the point.
I'd
feel better if you had the child in
Mexico City
. Your father and your aunt are there, you wouldn't be alone."

Concepcion
frowned. "My place is here, with my husband. I belong by your side and here I'll stay."

"I don't want you here!"

She tightened her lips. "Is that why you ride every week to El Doblez?"

He
hadn't
thought she paid any attention to his comings and goings. Damn it, what he chose to do was none of her business! "What I do in El Doblez has no bearing on you going to
Mexico City
," he said coldly.

"You never touch me anymore!" she cried. "You have another woman, some cheap
puta
in El Doblez. But I'm your wife and I won't leave you."

Diarmid took a deep breath, fighting his rising anger. How dare she refer to Angelica as a whore?
He'd
never so much as kissed the lass, he only went to see her and talk to her.

"I have no other woman," he told her. "I'm thinking of your own good--yours and the child's.

"I don't believe you. How can you ask
me
to make such a long and arduous journey in my condition? You know how miserable I feel, how sick
I've
been.
Rosa
understands
,
she takes care of me." Her accusing eyes told him that was more than he did.

"Damn
Rosa
! Take her with you if you can't do without her."

"I'm not going!"

Fury at this ugly, screeching woman thrust Diarmid to his feet. "If you won't go willingly, I'll send you away." He threw the words at her.

She glared up at him, tears swimming in her eyes, her hands gripping the wooden arms of the chair. "You can't force me to leave. If you try I'll tell about Myron's murder and how you hid his body."

Diarmid froze.

"I was at the cove that morning but I kept silent for love of you
,"
Concepcion
sobbed. "I heard Myron curse you for deserting his sister and now you try to rid yourself of me." She flung her arms wide. "Kill me as you killed him but do not ask me to leave your side.
I
will not go.
Ever!"

Someone tapped at the door. Diarmid strode over and threw it open.

"Does she need me?"
Rosa
asked
,
her eyes averted from his.

"Get the hell out of here!" Diarmid snarled, slamming the door in
Rosa
's face. He whirled on
Concepcion
. "Go
ahead,
tell the world what you know!"

She stretched her arms toward him. "I don't want to, I love you."

He turned away from the sight of her blotched, tearful face and her distorted shape but he
couldn't
close his ears to her pleading whine.

"I'll do everything you want, I swear I will," she said brokenly. "Anything except leave you. Didn't I lie for you and tell that man from
Los Angeles
I never heard of anyone named Myron?"

Diarmid grabbed her arm. "What man? What are you talking about?"

Concepcion
dabbed at her eyes with a lace-edged handkerchief. "He arrived on one of the days you were in El Doblez. Inquiries came from
San Francisco
, he said, about a missing man thought to be on his way here. He told
me
the name. It was Myron.
I
said such a person had never come to the rancho. The servants all agreed this was true."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You're hurting my arm," she said.

He let her go. "Why?"

"Because I knew the truth and didn't want to cause you worry. Just let me stay by your side and I'll never breathe a word about Myron for as long as I live."

Diarmid
didn't
move for long moments, his mind whirling as rapidly as a dust-devil and to as little purpose.
Concepcion
had him stymied. He controlled the urge to shake her until her teeth rattled.
He'd
never dreamed she was so devious.

No
doubt
the servants reported every move he made to her, she probably even knew he carried one of Angelica's handkerchiefs in his vest pocket.
Rosa
was the worst of the lot, always creeping around the place, outwardly meek as a mouse. He was sure she hated him and had from the first.

Damn it, he
didn't
have to put up with being spied on and he wouldn't. He already had a market for the avocado crop,
he'd
have that money coming in, he could afford to hire decent servants. Much as he hated to admit it,
Concepcion
was right about a long journey in her condition being dangerous. In his eagerness to get rid of her, he
hadn't
thought the plan through. He
couldn't
afford to have her miscarry the child that would guarantee him the rancho.
She'd
have to remain here until the baby was born.

"You'll stay with me," he told
Concepcion
curtly. "Rosa and the rest will go. I'm hiring new servants."

"Not
Rosa
!" she wailed.

"There's a midwife in El Doblez, I'll have her come to you."

"But
Rosa
is not like a servant, she's my friend."
Concepcion
clutched at his hand. "Oh, please--"

"Do you love
Rosa
more than you do me?"

"No, no, how could I?" She began crying again.

"
Rosa
hates me. Why should
I
be forced to put up with someone like that in my own house? Out she goes with the rest of them."

Ten days later,
Concepcion
watched Diarmid ride toward
Los Angeles
. True to his word,
he'd
sent away all the servants, some she'd known since her childhood, and hired three women from El Doblez, one a midwife. He was going to
Los Angeles
in search of male workers because it had proved impossible to find men from the fishing village who wanted to work at the ranch.

The two vaqueros had left on the first of the month because Manuelo was bringing new cowboys, relatives of his bride, with him from
San Diego
.

Concepcion
wrapped her arms over the vast bulge that was her stomach and tried not to weep as Diarmid, without once turning to wave, disappeared from sight. With the new servants, the house no longer felt
like her own
. Though they obeyed her orders, she knew they were afraid of her and she had no idea why.

How she missed
Rosa
!

“I'll come if you need me, never mind what he says
,"
Rosa
had assured her. Much as
she'd
have liked to believe Rosa,
Concepcion
feared she'd never see her again.

Why was Diarmid so cruel to her? She
didn't
want much, only to be with him for the rest of her life.
Wasn't
she his wife?

Sighing, she turned and walked slowly back to the house.
She'd
noticed the slightest exertion made her short of breath now and it upset her.
Also
, she could only get her feet into one old pair of slippers. When
she'd
mentioned her worries to the midwife, Anna, the woman had merely shrugged.

Concepcion
was resting upstairs when the young messenger rode in at noon, asking for the midwife. She reached the head of the stairs in time to hear the youth say bluntly, "Maria Gomez's baby is stuck inside her. If you don't come, they'll both die."

"I'll come,"
Anna
agreed.

"But what about me?"
Concepcion
called down the stairs. "What if I need you?"

 
“Isn't Maria my friend?"
Anna demanded. "Would you have me let her die? You aren't due to have your baby for another month--why would you need me
tonight?
In any case, I'll be back in the morning."

By the time
Concepcion
returned to her room for her slippers and descended the stairs, Anna was gone. Not only Anna, but the other two women as well, evidently taking the chance to ride home and see their families.
Without asking her!
How dare they?
Perhaps because they didn't mean to return?

Madre de Dios
!
Concepcion
thought,
I'm
all alone.
She'd
never been left alone in her life. Terror skimmed along her spine and she dropped to her knees in the corridor by her father's study and rested her head against the wall. "Mother Mary
have
mercy on me," she prayed between sobs. "Help me."

She wept until no more tears came and could hardly drag herself to her feet afterwards. She stumbled into the study and eased into her father's favorite chair. "Oh, papa," she whispered, "I wish you were here."

Inside
her
the child moved sharply, somehow kicking her in two places at once. "Be still, little one," she murmured, stroking her stomach.

The reminder of her baby soothed her. She must be strong. Whether she felt like it or not, she must find food and eat for the child's sake. However afraid she was,
she'd
survive alone, she and the child, both. Anna had said
she'd
be back tomorrow.
And
even if she didn't return, Diarmid would.
He'd
promised.

When the shadows lengthened into the winter dusk,
Concepcion
's small flare of courage dimmed.
I'll
light all the lamps, I'll light extra candles, she told herself.
There'll
be no darkness inside the house.
Nothing to be afraid of.

Once
she'd
carried out her plan, the casa took on a deceptive air of festivity, as though for a party. With a
shock
she realized the Christ Child's birthday was almost upon them. Recalling
childhood
Christmases when she was secure and happy and loved brought tears to her eyes but she blinked them back determinedly.
whatever
she did, she must not begin crying again. It
wasn't
good for the child.