The Beast (18 page)

She went to bed shortly before midnight and wondered what Dimitri was up to at that exact moment.

*****

She slept
in; her depression probably had more to do with it than any other reason. Without Dimitri she felt listless, unable to even fake interest in anything outside of her own little ball of misery. She was still wearing the same clothes from Dimitri’s when she left the house. She couldn’t bear to take them off just yet. It was a little chilly for such a light dress and jacket, but she didn’t care. She wanted him with her. She missed the platinum cuffs on her wrists, even though she’d had them for such a short time.

She decided to walk to the bank, check her account and have her card replaced. She knew without going that she was now a very wealthy woman. Even though she wouldn’t give him her information for a money transfer, she had a feeling he would have already tracked her down and stayed true to his word.

She was going to move out and take Eden with her. That was the only way she could happily leave as long as her father was alive. She couldn't leave Eden alone no matter how much she wanted a life of her own now.

As she stepped onto the sidewalk, she heard her name being called. Stuart was standing under a tree a
short distance down the street; he was holding her purse.

“Hey Stuart,” she said as she approached him. She didn’t know what Dimitri had done to her, but seeing Stuart now made her previous crush seem like a ridiculous attempt at normalcy. She wasn’t his kind of normal though, she
preferred her and Dimitri’s way of seeing things.

“Oh my god, Col! Where were you? We’ve all been frantic about you. What happened?” Stuart said as she reached him.

“It was the craziest thing. It turns out it was the wrong guy, can you believe that? I ended up hiding out for a bit, then hooked up with one of the kitchen crew. I’ve been at his place for the last day,” she lied right to his face.

He clearly didn’t buy it, but he shrugged and chose to believe her. “Here,” he said and held her purse in her direction, “you left this in my truck.”

“Oh yeah, thanks. This saves me a lot of trouble, I was just about to go replace my cards.” She looked at him and saw him through different eyes. He was such a boy. How had he ever sent her heart racing or entered into her fantasies? Dimitri would be able to crush him like a twig. She turned to leave and said, “Ok, thanks for this, see ya,” as she moved away.

“Listen, about that night in the truck. I feel horrible, I reacted like an idiot, I am so sorry,” Stuart said and grabbed her arm, “Is there any way we can start over?”

“What about Debbie?” she asked as she turned back around to face him. “I’m not going to start anything with somebody else’s boyfriend. I just had too much to drink that night.” She was reaching for any excuse to throw him off without hurting him.

“I broke up with Debbie, yesterday,” he said, “I wanted to show you how much I care about you, so I did it. Now we can be together, like you’ve always wanted.”

His face was so sincere and so ridiculous that Columbia had to suppress her laughter. She felt nothing towards him now, perhaps some sympathy at his misguided attempt to prove his interest in her. Debbie was a bitch though, so in the end Stuart was better off without her. “Stuart,” she started and sighed, “It’s just that-”

He cut her off, “Don’t go on. I need to say this. That night in the truck, I felt your arm, I behaved like an asshole. I’m sorry, I don’t care what’s wrong with you, I am willing to forget about it and just get to know you.”

“That’s just it Stuart, there is nothing wrong with me,” she told him with a small smile. “I’ve recently realized that I
am
normal, I am beautiful and there is really absolutely not a damn thing wrong with me.”

“I didn’t mean that,” he pleaded, “it came out wrong. I just want you to know that I accept you no matter what that is.”

She yanked the sleeve of the jacket and showed him her arm. The cold made the scars stand out an angry red against her pale skin and the criss cross patterns were beautiful. Dimitri thought they were beautiful. “This is what it is, it’s nothing. I cut myself, that’s it. I don’t have some kind of disease or something that needs your acceptance. It just is, a part of who I am. You might find it disturbing but there are people in this world who find such things appealing.”

“I...I…” Stuart stuttered his response, “I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry you hurt yourself, that you feel like you need to.” He looked nervously at their house, knowing the source of her apparent psychosis, but terrified to name it. Her father would have Stuart pissing himself before he got a word out. Columbia didn’t know why she ever thought he could be her saviour.

“It’s ok Stuart,” she told him and pulled the jacket down. “I’m fine now, I’m happy. But let’s face it; you need to find yourself some sweet young environmentalist who cares about the city as much as you do. Eat your vegan meals, ride your bikes, go to your rallies and save the planet. That girl is not me, but you will find her.” With that she turned and walked away. He called to her as she hit the end of the block, but she didn’t turn back. Stuart was a nice guy, and he deserved a nice girl. Columbia had the sneaking suspicion that after being with Dimitri, she would tear a nice guy like Stuart apart if she ever decided to take him up on his offer.

She hummed all the way to the bank where her suspicions were confirmed. Her account now contained a number with more zeroes behind it than she thought possible. The bank teller’s eyes widened in shock when she saw the amount and slid the print out across the counter at her. Columbia took out a few hundred dollars just to have, but didn’t know what she’d do with the rest. Life didn’t feel like much of a consolation prize when she didn’t have Dimitri in it. She wasn’t suicidal, she was just...empty.

She went home and decided to have another nap. The last thought on her mind as she slipped into sleep was of Dimitri’s incredible eyes, the way they burned as he plunged himself into her and wrapped his hand around her throat.

*****

The alarm went off indicating her father’s imminent return. She went into the kitchen and found Eden actually doing homework. She smiled, ruffled her hair and said, “Hey, there might be some hope for you yet.”

Eden pulled back, looked her up and down and said, “Seriously, dude, what is wrong with you? Are those the same clothes you were wearing yesterday? Gross!”

“I just love you, remember that,” she told her little sister, “Now how about we order some pizza?”

“Oh my God, are you serious?
Wow, ok, can I get that ham and pineapple we had at Auntie Lizzie’s house?” Eden asked with sudden enthusiasm for Columbia’s apparent changes.

“Yes, you can order anything you want,” Columbia told her, “chicken wings, pasta, garlic bread, dessert, drinks…the whole shebang!”

“Oh my god, this is crazy...ok, let me grab the menu,” Eden said and studied the folded paper flyer with the intensity of a grad school candidate. Columbia understood how exciting it was though. They weren’t exactly poor; they just never had any money. Her mother barely scraped by after she spent her paycheques on gambling and drinking...and possibly drugs. Columbia had never bothered to ask. Her father made decent money on the docks, but they rarely saw that either. He paid the mortgage on the house, gave Columbia a couple hundred bucks a month for groceries and spent the rest on himself.

Pizza was a rarity, so much so that the pizza place didn’t even have their number on file. They had never delivered to their little house.

After the order was placed, Columbia turned the TV on and called for Eden to watch a silly teen drama.

Her father came home just after the pizza got there. Columbia
had tipped the kid with an extra twenty and laughed when he wouldn’t stop thanking her. They laid their feast out on the counter and dug in.

“What the fuck is this?” her father asked after he took his boots off and grabbed his two dinner beers. “Where the hell did this shit come from?”

Eden swallowed the piece in her mouth with a gulp and lowered her eyes. Columbia looked him square in the eyes and said, “I bought it.”

“How the fuck did you pay for this? Is this about the other night? That guy friend of yours? He pimping you out now, making a little money off your slutty ass?” he demanded, took a long pull off the bottle and slammed it into the table.

Columbia could feel her heart beating faster and she clenched her fists. Her father’s face was red with anger and distorted as he kept screaming accusations at her. She turned to Eden and said, “You should go to your room.”

“But-” Eden protested, she hadn’t finished her first slice of pizza yet.

Columbia didn’t even look at her, she gritted her teeth and hissed, “Just go.”

Eden stood up and took her plate with her, grabbing the cardboard container of wings and a can of Coke along the way. They were never allowed to have food in their rooms, but even Eden sensed that things were be
ing done differently around their house now.

Her father had gone quiet and was watching her with squinted eyes. He took another long swig of beer and set the bottle down with a thud. “So you gonna explain to me what the fuck is going on around here all of a sudden?” he snarled.

“I don’t have anything to say to you,” Columbia replied in a steady voice. “I will be taking Eden and moving out. I can’t live with you anymore, the sight of you makes me sick.”

“You’re the sick one, always coming on to me, crying for me to stick it in you. Asking me if you could suck it,” he said, matching her tone. “You’ve been a freak from day one, and a little slut too.”

Columbia stood up and turned to walk to her room. She heard his chair scrape the floor behind her as he pushed himself away from the table. She turned, as if in slow motion, and saw him coming for her. His fist connected with her face and everything turned to red.

The most difficult thing he’d ever done was let her go. He watched on the monitors as she left his apartment and got onto the elevator. As she walked away, he felt his entire existence shrink, like the air had been sucked from the room. He walked to the guest room where she had spent the night and curled up on the bed. He held the pillow against him, it still smelled like her. He fell asleep like that, pathetic, sniffing a pillow, curled on a bed that was too small for him...and feeling lonely.

When he woke up he tried to imagine what she was doing. It was evening, so he went into his office and sat at his desk, trying to summon her to his side through sheer will alone.

He knew it had been the right decision; she was fragile and unable to survive in his world. He knew she had a fire in her, but that would take years to develop...if she survived his nightly rages.

He’d never slept with anyone, so he never knew what he did in his sleep. Most mornings he woke covered in sweat, the sheets twisted around his body and the bed a mess. It never occurred to him that he was haunted by Sergei in both worlds, waking and sleep
ing.

He found her information with ease, and tracked her bank account. He set up a transfer from an offshore business account of his, entered a number, thought about her tinkling laugh and her velvety cunt and added an extra zero to the total. Money was nothing to him, more of a means to fuck with Sergei than anything else, but he knew in her world it would make a difference. He never wanted her to make bad choices based on her
finances; at least he could give her that.

Perhaps in time, once he eliminated Sergei and took control of the
Bratva
himself, he would be able to come back for her. If they could sleep in separate beds, she should be ok. He wasn’t sure running the
Bratva
was the thing he wanted to do though, but if it meant keeping her safe, he would do it.

Until then,
Sergei would delight in finding out about her, finding out about Dimitri’s major weakness.

His transactions done, he texted the concierge. It was
Thursday; he would be home in the morning. Most likely he was in the air at the moment, but Dimitri needed to connect with somebody else to rid himself of the feeling that he was the last person in the world.

“Followed your advice, ready to jump on time,” is all he wrote. He knew this would please the concierge, but it still made him feel sick to his stomach.

He got up and went to the gym, a few hours in there would clear his head and help him ease the pain of losing Columbia, his little dove.

*****

“Excellent choice,” the concierge said as Dimitri pointed at a random colour on a paint palette in his hand. “That was the last decision, I will get these off to the designer at once.” He shot him a side-glance as he left the room, but Dimitri barely noticed.

He was in a funk. That’s what the concierge called it anyhow. They had been going over the plans for the penthouse in Hong Kong and Dimitri couldn’t recall a single thing he chose. He would not
be surprised if every colour led back to something that reminded him of Columbia. Her black, thick hair showing up in the black leather furnishings. Her green, sparkling eyes in the jewel tone paint. He simply didn’t fucking care about his surrounding unless she were with him. He felt like letting her go had been the worst decision he’d ever made.

He sat in a club chair in the middle of his bedroom...their bedroom...and stared out at the mountain. He remembered Columbia’s delight with the windows and the view...and his cock. He craved her on his
cock; he craved being inside of her. He was beginning to wonder if he would ever be the same.

“Let’s discuss packing, what will you be bringing from this place?” the concierge asked as he returned to the room. “I have compiled a list if you would like to go over it. The Renoir from the Library, for example. I know you love that piece.”

Dimitri waved his hand towards a small pile of clothing on his nightstand. “I’m taking that,” he said.

“What is that?” the concierge asked, his nose in the air. “Do you want me to pack it now?”

“No!” Dimitri growled and stood up. “I will keep it with me.” He strode to the bed and picked up the pile. It was the hoodie, tights, bra and underwear from Columbia’s first night here. The things he’d taken from her when she broke in. He held them up to his face and inhaled her scent. He knew he looked like a crazy man, an insane idiot, but he didn’t care. Everything was meaningless without her by his side.

“Are you ever going to tell me what happened?” the concierge asked, concern on his face.

“I don’t know if I can ever explain it,” Dimitri replied, “it was...I don’t know, my friend. I’ll only know I’ll never be the same.”

“You made the right choice though,” the concierge reassured him, “she would have been a walking target. You saved her life by letting her go before Sergei’s people made the connection.”

“I know,” Dimitri agreed, “but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.”

The concierge stood wordlessly for a moment, then launched into a detailed explanation of their travel plans. Dimitri didn’t hear a word the other man said, but was eternally grateful for the distraction. His old friend knew exactly what he needed to make it through the next few hours...days...years...however long it took him to be able to breathe without thinking of her face with every beat of his heart.

*****

The concierge shook
him sometime during the night. “You need to wake up, you need to see this,” he told Dimitri.

Dimitri slowly surfaced into consciousness and sat up in the bed. He took a moment to gather his thoughts and said, “What is it? Are we in danger?”

“No,” the concierge said, “but your friend might be.”

“What friend?” Dimitri asked, cleared his throat and went on, “What is going on?”

“Your girl, she’s at the front. I didn’t know if I should let her in or not,” the concierge told him, “I needed to ask you first. This is entirely up to you, but you know I think she doesn’t belong with us.”

“She belongs nowhere else,” Dimitri said and pushed himself out of bed. “Go, let her in! Send her back! She has returned to me.”

The concierge left in a hurry and Dimitri pulled some loose pants and a tee shirt on. He suddenly felt bashful in front of Columbia and didn’t want to greet her in the nude.

He paced at the end of the bed a few times when he heard the concierge in the hall. “Don’t just go in there, let me tell him you’re here.”

Columbia clearly didn’t listen, the door swung open and she was there, a glorious vision in yellow and red. She stopped and the concierge appeared behind her. “I tried to tell her-” he started to say, but Dimitri waved him off, the concierge left and shut the door behind him.

He noticed the blood then. She was wearing the same yellow dress she’d left in, but she was covered in blood. Her hair looked matted with it, her face was smeared with it and there were huge sprays of it down the front of her dress. Dimitri had killed enough people to know that she had been involved in a bloody and violent struggle.

“My god,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper, “Columbia, what’s happened? Are you ok?”

She started to cry, her tears running down and streaking through the blood on her cheeks. She walked towards him, slowly, on trembling legs. He noticed a cut above her left eye
and a spreading bruise. He never hit her there; he knew this was fresh. “I killed him,” she cried out as she reached him. He opened his arms and cradled her against his chest. He could do nothing but hold her close as she sobbed.

“Who did you kill?” he asked, but already knew the answer.

“My father,” she said, her voice muffled by his chest, “I took a knife and I stabbed him. I stabbed him so many times. There was so much blood...I never knew there would be so much blood.”

“Shhh it’s ok,” he told her and stroked her hair. He could feel the dried blood there, she smelled of it too, pungent and tangy. “You did the right thing, coming to me, I can help.”

“I can’t go back,” she sobbed again, “I can’t go home, the police will take me.”

“It’s ok,” he said, trying to soothe her, “It’s ok, it’s all over, and soon you won’t remember a thing. It will be all in the past.”

She raised her head and looked at him, her face streaked with blood and tears, her eyes shining and fierce. She grabbed his arms and gripped hard, her face intense and she said, “That’s just it, Dimi. I don’t want to forget. I liked it...I liked it so, so much.”

His heart swelled to hear her speak those words. The one thing that had kept them separate now cleaved them in ways he could share with no other. He recognized her killer’s heart, and knew she would match him in the art of assassination. He had met his match, from head to toe, through and through, she was the one for him.

“My love, little dove, my heart...to hear you say that,” he said and kissed her. She had her lips parted, waiting for him, and he could taste the tang of her father’s blood mixed with the salt of her tears. She was fierce and magnificent, and she would survive in his world.

“I need you
,” she said and stepped back, tore off the blood soaked dress, dropped it to the floor and kicked off her boots. “Fuck me,” she told him, “don’t make me beg.”

He pulled his tee shirt off, it was now red with the blood from her fresh kill, and threw it on top of her clothing. She couldn’t
wait; she pulled his pants down and stood in front of him, her face full of hunger.

He lifted her and took her to their bed. He was entranced with her beautiful blood-streaked face, like a proud warrior queen of old, fresh from battle. She was smiling as he pushed her legs apart and climbed between them.
“Don’t ever send me away again,” she said as he ran his hands all over her body, marveling that she was in front of him. “I can’t survive out there, without you. Please let me stay.”

“I will never let you go,” he vowed to her and slid upwards to find her entrance. He knew in that moment, when he pushed inside of her for the first time since realizing how much he needed her, that he would never destroy her. He might have his dark predilections and urges, but her love, this pure, savage love would keep her safe in his arms. Together they would walk through the night, rolling and twisting like titans in each other’s arms, bu
t in the morning they would be whole and better for having faced the dark by each other’s side. “I love you,” he said and held still inside of her tight heat. His cock pulsed against her cunt as they stared into each other’s eyes.

“I love you too,” she replied and held onto his arms. “I love you more than I ever imagined possible. I thought I was dead before you, you gave me life.”

“This must be love,” he said and leaned down to caress her neck while he withdrew his length from her pussy with excruciating precision. He thrust himself back inside of her, back where he belonged and felt her cunt tighten around him, pulling him further inside.

“Yes,” she said with a sigh and let her head fall to the side in absolute bliss, “Yes, this is love.”

He increased his pace and her body reacted under him, she pulled herself up towards him and hung off his broad shoulders. He sat up and brought her with him, impaling her further on his cock, slamming into her. They were entwined and upright, she wrapped her legs around his hips and clung to him in her need.

“I love you so much,” he whispered into her ear and wrapped a hand around her throat. At first she gasped and leaned her head back to accommodate his large hands. He was gentle with his grip, aware of how sore she must be after the other night.

After a moment or two he could feel her need building and knew she is going to come at any moment. He waited for it, the anticipation building his pleasure almost as much as the act itself.

Perfectly timed,
she pulled herself up again, turned her blood-streaked face towards his forearm, replied, “I love you too,” and latched her teeth on.

They came together, pain and blood and sweat and tears a testament to the bond they were forging in that moment. Something deeper than love, something bigger than either of them, and something so far beyond the realm of normal that it was almost mythical.