The Billionaire Single Dad (11 page)

BOOK: The Billionaire Single Dad
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He'd meant it. Another week, maybe two, and he could easily find himself in love with her.

Thinking back on it, those moments were dreamlike. His chest ached and Carter rubbed at his sternum as though he could banish the emotions that continued to torture him in the harsh light of day.

“I want to make you breakfast.” Tess's breathy murmur only served to harden his cock and she angled her hip to glide against his erection. The softness of her skin branded him.

His panic resurfaced and Carter rolled away from her with a harsh exhale. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and looked over his shoulder at Tess to find her studying him, her expression a mixture of curiosity and hurt. How could he have ever thought they could do this and come out on the other side unchanged? Unhurt.

“Nate will be here any time,” he said. Realization dawned and Tess sat up in bed, bringing the sheet with her. Carter wanted to tug it away, to bare her gorgeous breasts to him one last time. That would be playing with fire, though. If he started there, he knew he wouldn't stop until he was once again buried inside of her.

“We should probably get up and get dressed, huh?” He didn't miss the disappointment in her tone, and Carter's mood soured. Goddamn it, he didn't want to be the responsible adult. For the first time in his life, he wanted to be more like Travis. To care only about himself.

That's not who Carter was, though. He'd never be that guy. “Maybe I could get a raincheck on breakfast.” His heart plummeted from his chest and landed at the bottom of his gut. “It would probably be best if the girls didn't come home and wonder what you're doing here so early in the morning.”

“Right. Of course.” Tess averted her gaze and Carter had never felt like more of an asshole.

This was only one of the reasons why he'd avoided jumping back into the dating pool. He refused for his girls to see a revolving door of hookups walk in and out of their lives, and likewise, Carter wasn't going to be the sort of single parent that constantly sent his daughters away so he could get laid. Tess didn't deserve this.

Carter stood and retrieved the pair of workout pants he'd left on the floor last night. His gaze wandered to a dresser in the far corner of the room and the framed family picture of him, Steph, and the girls that they'd taken by the lake when Jenny and Jane were two years old. Guilt flared in his chest, squeezed his lungs until he couldn't take a decent breath. Steph was gone and Tess was right here, warm, willing, and so caring. And instead of letting her stay to greet the girls with him and share a nice breakfast, he was kicking her out as if he was ashamed of her.

Carter wasn't equipped to deal with any of this. He felt as though his heart would explode at any minute. He didn't want to hurt Tess but damn it, he didn't know what else to do.

“Maybe after the girls get settled back in, we could do lunch or something? I could make sandwiches and we could do a picnic down by the water so the girls can play in the sand.”

God, even now Tess was trying to salvage the day. Carter pulled his pants up over his ass and turned to face her. “Yeah, maybe.”

Her hopeful expression fell. Her lips turned downward and Carter wanted to kiss away her disappointment and the sadness that glistened in her deep blue eyes. He had to think about Jenny and Jane, though. He had to do what was best for them.

Is this what's best for them … or you?

Carter reached for the dresser beside his bed and searched for a T-shirt. He tried to not notice as Tess slipped out of the bed to dress. His gaze lingered on the smooth skin of her back, the curve of her waist, and the perfect globes of her ass that he'd cradled in his palms.

“We don't have to do a picnic.” She glanced over her shoulder at him as Carter pulled his shirt over his head to keep from meeting her gaze. “We can do whatever you want. We don't even have to do lunch if you want to spend the afternoon with them by yourself.”

A pang speared his chest, and Carter tried to rub it away. She was too damned understanding. Too compassionate. Considerate. So fucking sexy as she glanced at him over the creamy skin of her bare shoulder. The same shoulder he'd sunk his teeth into as he'd taken her from behind. Carter took a deep breath in through his nose and let it out slowly through his mouth. He couldn't bear to hurt her, but he didn't think he could open himself up to more heartache.

“We'll see.” It wasn't an outright “no” but he could tell from Tess's expression that she'd gotten the gist. Carter's gut knotted up so high he swore it had retreated into his throat. “The girls might be tired since I doubt Nate put them to bed at a decent hour.”

“That's fine.” Tess's voice became so small that Carter had to strain to hear her. “I'll be home either way.”

Carter stared at the wall as Tess continued to dress in silence. He couldn't bring himself to take even a step away from his spot on the other side of the bed because he knew his damned traitorous feet would take him straight to Tess and he'd do everything in his power to assuage her. This was for the best. They'd agreed there didn't need to be any strings attached.

“You guys can come over if you change your mind.” Tess headed for the bedroom door and Carter's jaw clenched. “My door's open.”

Silence and loneliness swallowed him, and his muscles tensed to the point of pain. He'd turned his back on Tess, made her feel as though what happened between them meant nothing. In guarding his own heart, he'd damaged hers. He was nothing more than a selfish asshole who didn't deserve her.

Steph would be so proud.

*   *   *

“Daddy! Daddy! We rode in a helicopter!”

“We saw a giraffe!”

“A goat tried to eat Jane's shirt!”

The girls' excited voices carried from Carter's patio. Tess listened through the screen as she poured herself a cup of coffee. The hurt of her exclusion sliced through her and she let out a shaky breath. No walk of shame she could ever conjure in her imagination could have compared to the flare of heartache when Carter suggested she leave. As though she wasn't good enough for his brother and his fiancée to meet. As though she wasn't good enough for Jenny and Jane.

Tears stung at Tess's eyes as memories of the previous night flooded her. Of Carter's heartfelt words when he'd whispered in the dark,
I think I could love you, Tess
. She knew better than to believe the things men said post-orgasm. She'd lost count of the times Jared had said the same sorts of things. He'd told her she was the only woman he'd ever love. The only one he'd ever want. In the meantime, he'd been enjoying a little side action with her best friend.

It's not as though she'd wanted to move in with Carter, play house, and be a mom to his girls. She'd known him for a little over a week and yeah, the past twenty-four hours had proven that they were more than sexually compatible, but that didn't make for a relationship. She'd simply wanted more than his not-so-casual brush-off.

Morning gave way to afternoon and before Tess knew it, the sun had set. She sat in her living room, the furniture and floors still covered with drop cloths while she drowned her sorrows in a monster bowl of four-cheese mac 'n cheese and a glass of red wine. In the background, she barely noticed the episode of
The Following
she'd been trying to watch. Not even FBI agent Ryan Hardy could hold her attention tonight.

The soft sound of someone knocking at the back patio door sent a shock of adrenaline racing through Tess's bloodstream. She checked the time on her phone—almost eleven. She went to the kitchen, her heart in her throat. Four palms and two little faces were pressed against the glass. Good lord. It was a wonder any part of Carter's sanity remained intact with those two around. She let a slow sigh and tried to calm the racing of her pulse as she slid the door open to let them in.

“I know for a fact your dad doesn't know you're here.”

“He thinks we're in bed,” Jenny said, sounding only a little guilty.

Jane jumped in to finish her sister's thought, “But he wouldn't let us come over earlier and we got something for you at the zoo.”

“I think he's back to being cranky,” Jenny said.

Jane gave an exaggerated sigh. “He should have come to the zoo and maybe he wouldn't be in such a bad mood.”

“You're going to make him even crankier if he goes to check on you guys and finds out you're gone,” Tess chided. She wasn't even their parent, yet she felt like grounding them both. Her house might have been next door, but little not-quite-six-year-olds had no business wandering around late at night. “Come on, let's get you two back in bed.”

“Wait!” Jane held out her little fist. A silver chain with a tiny penguin pendant dangled from her grasp. “Uncle Nate let us get this for you.”

Jenny added, “The penguins were our favorite part.”

“You two are the sweetest,” Tess crooned. She took the necklace from Jane and secured it around her own neck. “I love it.”

They beamed and their sweet expressions nearly did Tess in.

“Okay, back home with you two.” Their wide smiles transformed into pouty frowns. Tess took one of their hands in each of hers and escorted them across the lawn. She lifted them over the fence and then continued through Carter's lawn and onto the patio. Before she even had a chance to knock, he noticed them through the window. His scowl caused Jenny and Jane to squeeze Tess's hands tighter. She gave them each a reassuring squeeze in return. “He's not mad,” she said, “just worried. You can't sneak out of bed and leave the house. Especially this late at night. Got it?”

“Okay.” Their synchronized response coaxed a smile to Tess's lips, but she tucked it away.

She brought her gaze up to the window and as Carter approached, her pulse kicked into high gear. He slid open the door and looked down at his daughters. He definitely had the intimidating dad routine down and it reminded her of their first meeting. “Both of you, upstairs and get in bed. I'll be up in a second to talk to you.”

They took off like a shot through the kitchen. Moments later the muted thud of their tiny footsteps on the stairs could be heard and then the slam of a bedroom door. Carter kept his gaze locked on Tess, the expression so heated and intense it made her break out into a sweat.

“Sorry about that.” Apparently, they were back to being nothing more than neighbors. It might have been easy for Carter to pretend that the past twenty-four hours hadn't happened, but that wasn't so easy for her.

“You know I don't mind. I talked to them about sneaking out of the house, though. They shouldn't be running around at night.”

“I can handle them,” Carter said.

The curtness of his words stung. “I know you can,” Tess said. “I was just trying to help.”

Carter's expression softened. “Thanks. I need to go talk to them before they try to throw a sheet out the window and escape again. Good night, Tess.”

Once again, her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach like a stone. “Good night, Carter.”

She turned to leave. A strong hand gripped her upper arm and spun her around. Before Tess could right her careening world, Carter put his mouth to hers. The kiss was desperate, frenzied, so full of unspoken emotion that it nearly shattered her. When he pulled away, she was breathless and shaken, her body humming with awareness of this amazing man who affected her with only a look.

“You said you could love me.” Tess didn't care if she sounded desperate. She didn't want to give up on the prospect of a relationship with Carter before it even got a chance to get off the ground. “Would it really be so bad to see what might happen if we gave it a chance?”

“I shouldn't have misled you, Tess.” His words gutted her. “I—spoke in the heat of the moment. I lied.”

“No. You were being honest last night, you're not now. Can you really just let this go, Carter? Can you stand there and say that you don't feel a single thing for me?”

“I don't love you. What happened was just sex. An itch that we both needed to scratch. We agreed that emotions wouldn't get in the way, and I can't help it if yours did. We had a great time and that's all there is to it. It's over. I have to let it go, Tess.” His voice broke with the words. “I can't give you what you want.”

“What about what you want, Carter?”

He reached out and traced the line of her jaw with the pad of his thumb. “There can't ever be anything between us. What happened yesterday won't ever happen again. Good night, Tess,” he said again before turning and going back into his house.

Tess swallowed down the sob that threatened to break loose from her throat. That kiss, those words, were good-bye.

Twelve

Almost a week and a half had passed since Carter kissed Tess good-bye on his patio. His mood had spiraled into a cranky, antisocial state that caused the girls to seek refuge in their bedroom rather than spend time with him.

He sat on the patio, hoping to get a glimpse of Tess. Which was stupid because he was acting as though she was the one who'd cut off contact with him when it had been the other way around. His torture was self-inflicted, so if he was pissed, he had no one to blame but himself.

He hadn't stopped thinking about her, hadn't stopped replaying the memories of their time together in his mind. Those almost obsessive thoughts took up space in his brain that had been solely occupied by Steph up until now and it scared the shit out of him.

“Daaaaaad!” Jane called from inside the house. “Uncle Travis is on the phooooone!”

Carter cast one last hopeful glance toward Tess's house before going inside. Jane handed him the phone and then headed back into the living room where she and Jenny were watching
Frozen
. He swore if he had to listen to
Let it Go
, one more time, he was going to snap the DVD in two.

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