Authors: Nancy Springer
“They are mistaken.” Frain spoke so quietly, so evenly, that the sense of his words struck with a shock, jagged rock under still water. “It is the curse of the gods. Lord, I am entrapped. I have not been able to grow or leave anything behind in all my wanderings. Seven years and they have not helped me or healed meâit is as if I am frozen, a fly in amber. Lord, the wound smarts as if it were given but yesterday.”
For a moment there was silence. Even Trevyn did not seem to know what to say. Then the doctor scurried in, leading a servant with a steaming bowl of porridge. Frain could scarcely contain his eagerness. His hand trembled as he reached for the spoon.
“Slowly,” Trevyn cautioned, holding the bowl for him.
He ate, and not very slowly. As he sat back after eating we could see that he was in pain.
“Gut-ache,” he said. “Sorry. I tried not to gulp.” “Never mind. Lie down.” Trevyn helped him to curl up under the blankets. “Keep warm, maybe sleep. I will have someone bring you a warm brick.”
“Thank you. Truly, my lord, I feel that I shall soon be much better. Thank you for everything.”
He wanted us to leave. But Trevyn lingered, frowning thoughtfully.
“Only one more question, if you do not mind telling me. What were you seeking, that you set to sea in so small a craft, unprovisioned, and in the freezing season yet?”
“Ascalonia,” said Frain, his voice muffled by blankets. “Ogygia. The home of the goddess, if you will.”
“Is that a sunlit land? You could have gotten to it in a larger vessel, if it is, and at a more clement time of year. Or was it perhaps death you were seeking?”
“Yes, in a sense. Her name is Shamarra. But to find her I must first speak to the goddess in Ogygia.” Frain stirred tensely. “I hardly know anymore what I really seekâgrowth, death, change, endingâ”
“Who is Shamarra?”
“That is yet another question.” The daring of him, with a king he scarcely knew! But Trevyn smiled and touched his shoulder.
“Sleep well,” he said, and we left him. We did not speak until we reached the far end of the corridor.
He is a marvel
, I said finally. I sensed uneasily that he did not like me, and I wished I could abate my liking for him, but I could not.
“Ay,” said Trevyn absently. “I expected no less. And it is a good nameâcan you say it, Dair? FRAINâjust try it one sound at a time. FRâ”
Stop it!
Sudden, surprising anger snapped through me and I roared aloud,
Let me alone, I am of no use, I am fate's fool, a freak
âThe few servants within hearing fled in panic at the noise I was making, but Trevyn hugged me. I stopped my ranting, laid my head on his shoulder and groaned.
“I am sorry,” he said. “I won't badger you anymore.”
It is not you. The castlefolk talk in front of me as if I am too stupid to understand them. They call me woodwouse, wild man. I make such an oaf of a human
.
“They are frightened,” said Trevyn, and he stepped back a little, eyeing me with a smile. “You are rather awesome, you know. Face of the god of the wild thingsâI have seen gods, rememberâand strength enough for any two men, and grace coming to you already, grace learned from no human.⦔
Some of the maids beckon at me, as if I were meat for their tasting. Then they laugh at me when I refuse them. I wish I were
âI could not say I wished I were dead, though it had a fine ring to it, for it was not true. The Old Language speaks from the heart. It cannot say untruth.
“You wish you were a wolf again?”
There spoke Trevyn True King. He would not flinch from whatever was. I faced him with blinking eyes.
Yes. That is part of it. But the worst of it is
âI forced myself onward, floundering after the sour scent of truthâ
Frain. He does not like me any better than the others do
.
“He is frightened, too,” said Trevyn.
But why?
I had expected better of him, somehow.
“The essence of you, the wildness, I think. Because you remind him of somethingâor because he is frightened of things within himself.”
I had thought he would be courageous
, I complained.
“He is, he is very courageous! Look at how far he has come. And there is nothing more fearsome than what he is facing.”
I did not understand. But Trevyn spoke as one who knew.
“Perhaps he will learn a different sort of valor from you,” Trevyn added. “Perhaps that is what he has come here for, to learn from you.”
How?
I burst out.
I cannot talk to him, I can't read or write, even. Any dog could serve him better. Mother of mercy, what am I to do? He will not want me
â
Trevyn quieted me with a soft glance. We are not very different, you and I, that glance said. We are equals. I stood stunned.
“You will find your way, I am sure of it,” he said. “I was a mute, too, for a while, when I was with your mother. Perhaps you are indeed intended to continue what I have begun. Remember the words of the seeress, and await the word of the One.”
Chapter Three
Frain ate often during the next several days. When he was not eating, and sometimes as he ate, he talked with Trevyn. I would listen.
“Dair is my son,” Trevyn explained when he judged it was time. Frain looked both shocked and dubious.
“But how can that be, my lord? Are you older than you seem? I would have said that you two were nearly of the same age.”
“Nay, I am just twenty. And Dair was born only two years ago. He was a wolf. They mature faster than human young,” said Trevyn offhandedly. “There was some magic involved,” he added after a moment.
“I should think so.” Frain stared hard at me, his face like a mask. “Well, there is magic in Vale as well, though it is a harsher magic than what I sense here, and there were creatures there that were half beast, and I was not afraid of themâ”
“Magic, on the mainland?” Trevyn interrupted eagerly.
“I never really thought of Vale as part of the mainland.”
He spoke of Vale at some length. It was a place apart, turned inward upon itself because of the mountains that ringed it all around. It was ruled by canton kings and a high kingship of sacred monarchs who often went mad. Frain's foster brother Tirell was the son of one such king. Two things became clear as Frain spoke: one, that he loved his brother Tirell with a wolf's love, unquestioning. And the other, that Tirell had gone insane and hurt him badly. It was Tirell who had crippled his arm.
On top of that there was the matter of his fostering, of which he had been ignorant, that he had been given away at birth by his own parents. And on top of that there was the matter of Shamarra.
She was very beautiful with a delicate beauty, like crystal, pure and apart, like clear water. “She was the lake,” Frain explained. “Or theâbeing of the lake, the goddess of the lake. And the lake is very deep and shadowy and still, a hidden thing, it lies amid the mountains of death, what we call Acheron, where no one ever goes.”
We have seen it
, I said. Trevyn glanced at me sharply to hush me, for Frain found my voice disturbing. It took him some while to go on.
He had fallen into ardent love with Shamarra. He had looked into her lake without terror, bathed in it without being dragged down by dark fingers. Thus, all unawares, he had won his immortality. But Shamarra had loved TirellâI heard the hard undertug of anger in Frain's voice, nearly hidden by the smooth surface flow of his wordsâthough Tirell wanted only to avoid her. In the end she had offered herself to him, and in his madness he had taken her, savagely.
Raped her? The goddess? Did he really mean that? The words should have been cried out in rage or shock, but they were not. Neither of us knew how to answer Frain's unnatural calm. He stared back at us for a while and then turned away.
“She went away dishonored, with her hair streaming down over her face,” he said, and he would talk no more that day.
How Trevyn knew it of Frain, I am not sure, but it was true. Frain was frightened of the savagery within, of that which comes out in dark and dreams.
Though I had gone human, I was still a night creature by nature, napping by day, restless after dark. I roamed the castle when other folk were abed. And that night as I roamed I met with Frain. He was naked, for all folk slept naked in those days, and one glance told me he was not himself. His fair and gentle face was set in dangerous lines, and he walked like a beast that stalks its prey. As I watched, he crouched and crept his way to the great hall, and from the wall behind the dais he took a long smiting sword, an ornament that had not been used in yearsâwell, there was no need in Isle. Then he stood there with the weapon in his one good hand and his withered arm dangling. He had to lean against the sword's weight and contort himself for balance. He stood hearkening, but when I made a noise he did not hear me. He was in some other place.
“Tirell,” he breathed into the darkness. “Come and meet your doom, Tirell, for what you have done to me. Fabron, you deceiving bastardâ”
Fabron was his father who had given him away. Frain stood taut and naked holding the great sword, cursing Fabron and Tirell with every sort of punishment he or his gods could visit on them. The hatred in those curses chilled me, that and the blind stare of those clear brown eyes in the night. I fled to get Trevyn.
“Sleepwalking,” he said as soon as I had told him about Frain. He came with me, lacing his breeches as we ran. “He has been having trouble sleeping, so tonight they gave him a draught, and now he is sleeping with a vengeance. Where is he?”
Frain had left the great hall. After a few minutes we found him prowling catlike down one of the corridors. “Tirell, you coward, where are you?” he asked the night. The tone was full of threat. The sword was raised.
“I have to disarm him,” Trevyn said. “Dair, go get me one of the wooden practice swords from the barracks.”
He'll slice it right off
, I protested.
“I think not. That sword is old, dull of edge. A wooden sword will do.”
I brought it as quickly as I was able. Even so, Frain had stalked through a quarter of the castle by the time I got back, with Trevyn never far from his side, warning the guards out of his way. Frain had come out to a platform when I found them. Trevyn and a cluster of guards whispered nearby. Frain stood, no longer the coolheaded hunter, his anger pulsing hot, blood heat.
“Tirell!” He shouted the challenge, it rang from the stone walls. He had forgotten Fabron, it seemed.
Trevyn took the wooden sword from me and stepped forward to meet him. At the first touch of the mock blade to his own, Frain lunged forward, filled with lust to kill.
“Mothers!” Trevyn exclaimed, but it was not Frain's passion that surprised him. Frain was a master swordsman.
He was splendid, deadly. Even I could see that. The guards gasped, watching him. Trevyn was skillful, he had been well trained, but weapons had never been his main love. Dreaming had, and peace. There was no room for dreaming in that night.
“What am I to do with him?” Trevyn wondered aloud, breathing hard.
He had two good hands, and Frain had only one. Trevyn was trying to engage Frain's sword with his wooden one while he used his other hand to wrench it away. But it was all he could do to parry Frain's blows, far less get hold of that hilt. Frain was lightning fast, brilliant, murderous. Trevyn could not stand his ground. He gave way, circling back, feeling for advantage.
“Coward,” Frain taunted.
Hardly a coward, who faced him with a mock weapon. The guards eyed each other, wondering if they could help Trevyn without breach of honor, without hurting his pride.
“Surround him, you fellows,” Trevyn panted, forgetting pride for the time.
The guards moved to obey. But before they reached Frain the wooden sword broke with a horrible snap. I shouted with fearâFrain's sword flashed straight for Trevyn's head! He fell. But as the guards lunged forward a movement of his hand stopped them. And Frain stood still and lowered his long sword, breathed one last curse and walked away.
Trevyn waited until he was well down the corridor before he got up.
I thought you were as good as dead!
I told him, shaking. There was a welt on his head. He smiled at me.
“Praise be, I caught the flat of it. And Frain is satisfied with his revenge. At least I hope he is.”
He was. He went back to his bed and fell sound asleep. Some time later we slipped in and stole the sword away from him to take it back where it belonged. Trevyn went to see him first thing the next morning.
“What happened to you?” Frain demanded, staring. There was a bright red mark across the left side of Trevyn's forehead.
“I lost a bout to a better,” Trevyn said wryly. “How are you? Did you sleep well?”
“Iâno. Please, my lord, no more draughts. I slept, but I had the mostâterrible dream.”
“No more draughts,” Trevyn agreed readily, seating himself. “What was the dream?”
“Iâ” Frain looked down, uncomfortable. “I wasâquarreling with my brother.”
“Oh?” said Trevyn, prodding for better truth. Quarreling was hardly the word.
“Really, my lord, it was nothing, it was of no significance. Dreams are unaccountable things.” Frain looked quite pained. Trevyn had mercy on him, or a partial mercy.
“This brother of yoursâyou say he is a True King, and yet he ravished your beloved, crippled youâ”
“He was not himself,” Frain said hotly. “If you knew what he had gone throughâ” He would have sprung to sword for Tirell's sake, I felt sure of it. How odd! He who had been ready to kill him a few hours beforeâ
“The suffering comes before the kingship,” Trevyn remarked.
“Yes.” Frain gave Trevyn a wondering glance, all his heat cooled. “Yes, my lord, you know, you understand. Iâremember how he wept after he had wounded me. Then I fainted, and by the time I awoke he had come back from madness, he was better, truly better, warm and whole as I had not known him to be sinceâsince it had started. He was the brother I had always loved. He took my hand and met my eyes with love and sorrow, and the land itself hailed him, and all the people were rejoicing because the blessing of the goddess was on himâ”