The Clan MacDougall Series (120 page)

Aishlinn laughed until her eyes filled with tears. “Please, Nora! It hurts to laugh!”

While Nora did not envy Aishlinn her discomfort, she did envy Aishlinn’s life with Duncan and the life they created, even though he seemed intent on never leaving his mother’s womb.

“Aishlinn, what does it feel like?” The question was out of her mouth before she realized she had even thought it.

Aishlinn rubbed a hand across her stomach and smiled. “’Tis a good feeling most of the time. More the thought of having a babe to hold in my arms is better than actually carrying him around.”

Nora looped her arm through Aishlinn’s and they began walking again. Nora longed to know what it felt like to have a good husband to share her life with. Aishlinn had everything that Nora wanted: a good husband, a happy life, and a babe on the way.

It wasn’t jealousy or envy that Nora felt. It was a sense of longing. Longing to have a life similar to what Aishlinn and Duncan had together.

She wanted a home of her own, one where she could raise John and Elise. But she also wanted to share her life with someone. Someone like Wee William. A good, kind man.

Aishlinn sensed there was more that Nora wanted to ask or say. “Nora, what are you thinking?”

Nora gave a slight shake of her head as if to say her thoughts were of no importance.

“Nora, are we not friends?” Aishlinn asked.

“Of course we are! Don’t be silly,” Nora said with a smile.

“Then please, tell me what is on your mind. I fear we talk more of my problems and life than we ever do yours.”

Nora giggled. “That is because your life is far more exciting and happy a thing to discuss than mine.”

“That isn’t true, Nora.”

“Oh, but it is, Aishlinn. You are the chief’s daughter. You’re married to a most wonderful man who loves you so very much. You’ve a quaint home and a babe on the way. You see? Far more exciting and happy than my life.”

Aishlinn gave Nora’s arm a gentle squeeze. “You need a husband.”

Nora laughed aloud at that statement. “Aye, a husband would be a fine thing to have. But I fear that will never happen.”

“Why do you fear that? You’re a beautiful woman, Nora. And you have so much to offer a man.”

“That is very kind of you to say, Aishlinn. But I fear not all women are meant to marry. I tried it once, remember? It was an abysmal failure.” Nora did not like thinking about her marriage to Horace and her smile quickly faded at the memories.

“That is because you were married to the wrong man!” Aishlinn exclaimed. “I think you would feel differently if you were married to a kinder man, one with a heart!”

Nora smiled and nodded her head in agreement. “That is probably true. But what man would want to take on a widow and her little brother and sister? That is an awfully large burden to ask any man to bear.”

“It isn’t a burden when you are doing things together, Nora. It isn’t a burden when you are in love.”

Nora snorted. “Love? I think love is far too much to hope for. I’d settle for a husband who didn’t beat me and would let me keep John and Elise.”

“So that is all you want in a man? One who won’t beat you? And one who will let you keep your brother and sister?” Aishlinn shook her head and clicked her tongue in dismay. “You deserve more than that, Nora. You need someone who will love you like Duncan loves me.”

Nora felt that the love Aishlinn and Duncan shared was a rare and special gift. Aye, she might secretly wish something like that for herself, but knew the probability of ever experiencing such a thing, was as rare as a unicorn.

“What do you think of Wee William, Nora?” Aishlinn asked.

Nora felt her face grow hot and her heart skip a beat at the mention of his name. “What of him?” she asked, hoping her feelings for him were not too obvious.

Aishlinn grinned and cast a sidelong glance at Nora. “He’s a very nice man, Nora. He’d make anyone a fine husband.”

Nora cleared her throat but remained quiet. She believed that Wee William would make any woman a good husband. He was kind, warm, and generous, but Nora believed he needed a woman with more to offer than what she could.

“You could ask my father to help you find a husband,” Aishlinn suggested.

“Find me a husband?” Nora asked incredulously. Did Aishlinn believe she was incapable of finding one of her own accord?

“Aye,” Aishlinn answered. “If all you want is a man who will not beat you and allow you to keep John and Elise, then it shouldn’t be too difficult a task. I’m sure you could turn away anyone he might suggest, if the man wasn’t to your liking.”

They had finally reached the keep and paused outside the kitchen door. Nora pondered Aishlinn’s suggestion. She had no desire to continue to live in the women’s solar. John and Elise needed a home to call their own. They had been through so much in the past year. Mayhap a home of their own would help John to get over his anger and resentment.

Aye, she not only needed a husband, she wanted one as well. She wanted babes of her own someday and she was not getting any younger. Enlisting Angus’ help could only help her gain that which she so desperately wanted faster than she could accomplish on her own.

“I think that is an excellent idea, Aishlinn,” Nora said.

“Ye want me to do
what
, lass?” Angus was not sure he had heard her correctly the first time.

“I’d like you to help me find a husband,” Nora repeated. She was doing her best to sound more enthusiastic than she actually felt about the decision she’d made. She needed a husband.

It was true that she’d been a widow for less than a month. With no discernible skills to offer, she felt she would be better off trying to find a husband than a position with another castle. Besides, she was now an official member of the clan. Certainly that afforded her not only Angus’ protection, but his help as well.

More than a sennight had passed since the ceremony in which she’d become an official member of the clan. She could not understand why she was made to swear an oath of secrecy, but she’d made the solemn oath nonetheless. Daniel had explained the oath was necessary to ward off evil spirits. She supposed it was part of Gaelic traditions and superstitions, so she swore the oath.

In the days since the ceremony, some things had changed. She was learning to read, alongside her brother and sister. They were fully recovered and now allowed to play out of doors along with the other children. Elise had no problems making friends. John, however, was a bit slower to warm up to the idea of Scotland being their new and permanent home. Nora could only hope that with time and kindness, he would eventually adjust.

She had moved into the women’s solar, along with Elise. Their pallets were side by side and the room was in sharp contrast to the women’s solar at Castle Firth. This one was bright, sunny, and warm. The walls were draped in beautiful tapestries; the women were kind and graciously tried to teach Nora and Elise a few words in Gaelic.

But other than that, nothing else had changed. She had noticed that all the men did their best to stay completely away from her. She found that very unsettling and could not fathom why they behaved in such a manner.

Where the women were fun, generous, helpful, the men all acted as though she carried a pox! All save for Wee William, Daniel and David, and the other men that had brought her to Gregor. They were the only men to speak to her.

So here she was, standing before Angus McKenna, asking for his help. She held no idyllic notions that she’d ever find a romance like the one between Aishlinn and Duncan. She needed to think logically about the entire thing. Mayhap, if Angus were to spread the word that she was in fact seeking a husband, the men might treat her differently.

“A husband?” Angus looked positively baffled. “Ye want me to find ye a husband?”

Nora could not understand why her request seemed so foreign to Angus. It wasn’t as if she had asked him to pull the moon down from the sky so that she might have a better look at it. For a moment, she began to wonder if she weren’t breaking some Scottish social protocol that frowned upon such a request.

“I am sorry, m’lord, if my request is out of order,” she demurred. She had her hands clasped in front of her and prayed he could not see them tremble.

Angus blinked again and looked at his council. Fergus had a peculiar grin to his face, and the other men looked as though they were fighting to keep from laughing. Nora found the entire ordeal very unsettling. She was about to beg for their forgiveness and run from the room when Angus stood up.

“I see. Ye want a husband. Do ye have a particular man in mind?”

Nora shook her head ever so slightly. Truth be told, she’d rather Wee William were the one to offer his hand. But since he’d not shaved his beard or showed any outward signs that he wished to be anything more than friends, she assumed he had no romantic intentions toward her.

“Nay, m’lord. There is no one in particular.”

She took note of the glances that were cast between the men on the other side of the table. They whispered to each other in Gaelic and a few of them chuckled. Nora wasn’t sure she wished to know what they were saying and decided there was, perhaps, bliss in being ignorant.

“What kind of man do ye seek, lass? What kind of husband do ye wish fer?” Fergus asked.

Nora swallowed hard and gave his question some thought before answering. “Well, m’lord, I’d prefer a man who will not beat me.”

Her statement caused a bit of an uproar. There was much growling and scowling. One of the men stood up and said something to her in Gaelic. Though she had no idea what he was saying, there was no mistaking his anger.

Angus ordered them all to be still. “Lads!” he boomed. “Remember, the lass is Sassenach. She comes from a land where men beat their wives far more often than they bathe!”

Nora took offense to his statement. “M’lord, I can assure you that not
all
Englishmen beat their wives! My father never laid an angry finger on my mother.”

Angus looked and sounded sincere in his apology. “Fergive me, lass. But we find beating a woman or a child a most disgusting action. Such a deed is not only frowned upon here, ’tis grounds for expulsion. To suggest there be a man among us that would hit a woman, well, ’tis about as likely as yer king voluntarily givin’ Scotland her freedom.”

Nora regretted the fact that she had insulted the men. However, she did not regret the fact that she wanted to make it abundantly clear that she wanted a kind husband. “I do apologize, m’lord. I meant no disrespect. Please, forgive me. I was married to a very harsh man for more than a year. He thought nothing of beating me, for even the slightest transgression.”

She truly disliked admitting that fact openly to this group of strangers. Nora wanted to leave that part of her life far behind her.

“I can understand yer worry lass,” Angus voice had softened. “Ye can rest assured that no matter what MacDougall man ye might marry, he will no’ lay an angry hand to ye. Ye have me word on that.”

Nora thanked him with a smile before continuing on with her list of requirements. “My other requirement would be that he would allow my younger brother and sister to live with us.” That would be the only deal breaker she could think of, that would keep her from marrying someone. “And I want his promise in writing, before we’re married, that he would allow it.” She would not be tricked into marrying another man who would quickly turn John and Elise away.

Angus nodded his head as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I do no’ see where that would be a problem. Do ye have any other wishes?”

Aye, I wish for a man who can make the roof of my mouth tickle when he kisses me,
she thought to herself. There would be no way she could say those words out loud. “He must be kind and want to have children.”

Angus nodded. Thus far, her demands could easily be met by any number of available men. “Anything else?”

Nora could think of several other things she’d wish to find in a husband, but could not put them to voice. “Nay, m’lord. I have nothing else.”

“Well, then,” Angus said as he rubbed the palms of his hands together. “I shall spread the word that ye be lookin’ fer a husband. Yer a bonny lass. I do no’ think it will take long to find ye one.”

Nora hoped that he was correct and that when the men learned she was seeking a husband, they might begin to treat her differently.

She thanked each of the men and left the room, feeling a bit better than she had when she had first entered.

Fergus was the first man to break out into raucous laughter and was quickly joined by the rest of the men in the room. “How do ye think Wee William will respond to this bit o’ news?” he asked Angus.

Angus was not able to answer the question. He was too busy trying to catch his breath. The lass hadn’t a clue what her request was going to do to Wee William. “I dunnae! But I wish to be there to see the look on his face!”

“I wonder how many men are brave enough to offer fer her!” Thomas Gainer said with tear filled eyes.

Wee William had come to see the clan council a week ago, asking for a bit of land to call his own. He was quite willing to pay for it. The clan had refused his offer of money and instead gave him a piece of land not far from Aishlinn and Duncan’s home, as a reward for his many years of fealty and service to the clan.

When they had inquired as to why he wanted the land, Wee William explained that he was not getting any younger and that he would not always be able to fight as a warrior. He was simply making plans for his auld age. And he was absolutely adamant that it had nothing to do with thoughts of marriage.

The laughter finally began to subside and wagers were placed as to just how many days were left before Wee William shaved his beard. Others placed bets on whether or not Wee William would have an apoplexy at the news.

Angus gave it four days before Wee William shaved his beard, where Fergus gave him a week. “He’s too damned stubborn fer his own good, I tell ye. He’ll be able to hold out fer a week, but no’ a day longer.”

Angus called for a messenger to let the men in the clan know that a certain young woman was actively seeking a husband.